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Lacking enthusiasm- any similar? One for over 60s.


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Posted

Just a part of growing old I'm afraid. It's referred to as 'weltschmertz' in German; a mental depression or apathy caused by comparison of the actual state of the world with an ideal state.

By the time you're into your sixties you've seen almost everything before, and tried most things that are legal or feasible, and even maybe a few things that aren't legal.

That's why politicians are so irritating when you grow older; they just come up with the same old ideas and half-baked solutions to the world's problems that you remember from last time round.

All you can do is try to find something that makes you happy even if only briefly and that does not hurt anyone else.

On the other hand, are you on beta blockers? They certainly take the excitement out of life.

Nope, not on beta blockers.

Posted

My mom used to say....boring is as boring does.

Not really, but the truth is, you are boring to yourself. It is easy to make fun. If you sit home and think to yourself that your day would be complete if there was toilet paper in the bathroom and a museum to visit...you are indeed a boring person.

Most things that you can do in your homeland, can also be done here. There are gyms, healthfood stores, mountains, rivers, boats, bicycles, camping, hiking, fishing, classes, volunteer work, car shows.....well the list goes on.

If you are bored here, you would be dull anywhere. Sometimes you just need to pick yourself up and do something. The more you go out and network, look around and travel, the more people you run into and the more ideas you get. Sitting in one place does nothing for you. That is why I always was reluctant to give money to a wife/gf to buy a house for me here. It is much better to rent...and when the mood strikes you...move on. One sunrise and sunset if a new location can change your attitude.

Sorry, but you seem to have missed the point. I'm NOT "bored". I lack enthusiasm, which is not the same thing. I have loads of things that I do- I just fail to get excited about anything.

Posted

To the OP -- it's certainly not easy to give you any helpful advice. From what you've told us, it's fairly

obvious that your circumstances are very real and daunting for you. My ideas may not help at all, but

over the last 7 years since I retired I have had brief periods when I felt very much like you describe.

Of course, everyone is different, but some of the solutions I've found may give you some useful ideas.

The term libido comes to mind. An elusive term which is sometimes described as the center of male

enthusiasm. Some men take Andriol Testocaps to boost their libido, which is often used to mean their

sex drive, but actual a boosted libido significantly affects other male drives, such as enthusiasm, energy

and desire to accomplish something useful.

You might ask your doctor about Andriol Testocaps, which is not a drug but doses of testosterone, a

naturally occurring hormone in all mammals.

I have True Vision cable TV, but I watch TV very little. Other than a few science/nature/educational type

programs, for me most of the programming is a huge waste of time, provides absolutely no "satisfaction

in accomplishment" and adds very little to my quality of life in retirement.

I started out making long lists of things I wanted (or needed) to accomplish; here are some examples --

(1) write an adventure novel based on my own experiences

(2) reorganize my bookshelves

(3) reply to a stupid letter from the IRS

(4) Set up a filing system for all my important papers

(5) Tidy, sort and file all my accumulated papers

(6) Write letters (snail mail) to old buddies who lack email addresses

(7) Write to XYZ Bank about their recent very poor customer service

(8) Sort, tidy and file papers

(9) Prepare materials to study Thai, Japanese and Ilonggo with my wife

(10) Research performance & price of SUV tires (Nitto, Ohtsu, Sumitomo, etc)

Then I started dividing my "Items to Accomplish List" into short-term and long term. Then at least once or

twice a week, I update my list, add some new items and delete those that are completed.

The end result is, I have no time to get bored. I'm always doing something. If I get tired of a project bcoz

it is taking to long, I simple choose another. I'm the owner of my list and since the content is totally at my

discretion, I control all my own activities and pastimes in my daily life. Of course, when making my list I do

confer with my wife about what she wants accomplished and any scheduling issues.

For me, it's important to be in charge of my own life -- I don't want to have doctors or drugs in control of

my life like millions of my fellow countrymen. Being in control of my own life give me the satisfaction of

taking charge of my own happiness and my own future.

I simply do the things that satisfy me. And my main reward is satisfaction in accomplishment.

Hope this helps... even a little.

I am surprised to hear you relieve boredom by doing things I would consider boring. Of course, that only goes to show the differences between peoples.

Hmmmmm. I actually think

(1) write an adventure novel based on my own experiences

(2) reorganize my bookshelves

(

(4) Set up a filing system for all my important papers

(5) Tidy, sort and file all my accumulated papers

(

(7) Write to ......... about their recent very poor customer service

(8) Sort, tidy and file papers

were the sort of things that I found interesting ( along with all the other things I did outside the house ) in the past.

However, nowadays it takes a lot of effort to get around to doing my filing due to lack of interest.

I definitely have a couple of books in me as well, if only I found the enthusiasm to make the effort to write them.

Posted

To the OP -- it's certainly not easy to give you any helpful advice. From what you've told us, it's fairly

obvious that your circumstances are very real and daunting for you. My ideas may not help at all, but

over the last 7 years since I retired I have had brief periods when I felt very much like you describe.

Of course, everyone is different, but some of the solutions I've found may give you some useful ideas.

The term libido comes to mind. An elusive term which is sometimes described as the center of male

enthusiasm. Some men take Andriol Testocaps to boost their libido, which is often used to mean their

sex drive, but actual a boosted libido significantly affects other male drives, such as enthusiasm, energy

and desire to accomplish something useful.

You might ask your doctor about Andriol Testocaps, which is not a drug but doses of testosterone, a

naturally occurring hormone in all mammals.

I have True Vision cable TV, but I watch TV very little. Other than a few science/nature/educational type

programs, for me most of the programming is a huge waste of time, provides absolutely no "satisfaction

in accomplishment" and adds very little to my quality of life in retirement.

I started out making long lists of things I wanted (or needed) to accomplish; here are some examples --

(1) write an adventure novel based on my own experiences

(2) reorganize my bookshelves

(3) reply to a stupid letter from the IRS

(4) Set up a filing system for all my important papers

(5) Tidy, sort and file all my accumulated papers

(6) Write letters (snail mail) to old buddies who lack email addresses

(7) Write to XYZ Bank about their recent very poor customer service

(8) Sort, tidy and file papers

(9) Prepare materials to study Thai, Japanese and Ilonggo with my wife

(10) Research performance & price of SUV tires (Nitto, Ohtsu, Sumitomo, etc)

Then I started dividing my "Items to Accomplish List" into short-term and long term. Then at least once or

twice a week, I update my list, add some new items and delete those that are completed.

The end result is, I have no time to get bored. I'm always doing something. If I get tired of a project bcoz

it is taking to long, I simple choose another. I'm the owner of my list and since the content is totally at my

discretion, I control all my own activities and pastimes in my daily life. Of course, when making my list I do

confer with my wife about what she wants accomplished and any scheduling issues.

For me, it's important to be in charge of my own life -- I don't want to have doctors or drugs in control of

my life like millions of my fellow countrymen. Being in control of my own life give me the satisfaction of

taking charge of my own happiness and my own future.

I simply do the things that satisfy me. And my main reward is satisfaction in accomplishment.

Hope this helps... even a little.

I am surprised to hear you relieve boredom by doing things I would consider boring. Of course, that only goes to show the differences between peoples.

I agree with you about the differences between people.

You may consider writing a novel or studying languages boring, but for me watching football, baseball or basketball is super boring.

Or watching fishing or golf on TV -- for me, about as exciting as watching grass grow... but to each his own.

Most amazing is to see adults who spend huge amounts of time doing things like computer games or sitting in a bar drinking beer

everyday. I ask myself -- If I did this my whole life, would I die any smarter than when I was born? If the answer is no, I purposely

avoid those kinds of activities. But some folks seem to be happy with that.

A lot of my fellow Americans can't speak anything but English, and even in English cannot write a grammatically correct sentence.

Nor can they find London on a map, but if they're satisfied with that level of mental acuity, why should we bad-mouth them?... LOL.

Agree with you about watching sport on tv- I'd slit my wrists if I had to watch golf on tv, but some people obviously love it.

I did use to play computer games- I was trying to become world champion at Pacman back in the early 90s- but happily I realised it was an addiction, and stopped. Now I'd never play a computer game again. It's bad enough being addicted to tv and internet forums, but they do fill in the gaps when I'm just too unenthusiastic to do anything meaningful. Also, I refuse to have internet in the house, as having to actually go to the IT cafe means I have some interaction with other people, and I get to see those cute Thai girls riding on their m'bikes.

Never been a bar person, so at least that's never been a problem, though Gogos don't count as a problem.

Posted

I assumE you live in the uk, as all your tests have been free on the NHS????

Or maybe you only live part time in Thailand

I would be depressed at 63, living in UK, but here in Thailand i feel years younger,energetic most days,can even have sex twice, sometimes three times i one night,the only stimulant is my thai missus

Oh Lucky Man.

Had the tests in The UK before I retired to Thailand.

<I would be depressed at 63, living in UK>

Pretty depressing at any age. In London anyway.

Posted

Something others may have noticed too is how much interest you are taking in this thread by your regular response to suggestions etc.

Are you not feeling some sort of enthusiasm – at least about finding a solution to your problem? smile.png

Posted (edited)

I have two thoughts (well sometimes even more!)

One was brought on while reading the the OP and my eye fell on the tube on the desk UHU The All Purpose Adhesive:)I don't think it necessarily helps to have lots of things do.Boredom and tedium can come as much from routine activities even if they fill a day. It would seem that in some way you have lost a 'sense of purpose'. If you made the decision to come to Thailand you must have had a purpose in doing that and were presumably enthusiastic to do so? I am priviliged to have youngish children. It is impossible not have purposes with them around. Also I see my wife building her businesses with determination and enthusiasm; and we all laugh a lot.

The second thought is that while you may be pretty healthy, I wonder if you are not just tired?

Life here can be quite enervating. No accident you see Thai people asleep at all kinds of moments. While I love the early mornings and the sunsets I have learned to make sure I get enough sleep

Just thoughts

Edited by laolover88
Posted

Something others may have noticed too is how much interest you are taking in this thread by your regular response to suggestions etc.

Are you not feeling some sort of enthusiasm – at least about finding a solution to your problem? smile.png

Not exactly "enthusiasm" as such. More like intellectual interest.

I know that I used to be enthusiastic and that something is wrong now, so it's worth making enquiries in hope of getting my "mojo" back, but it's not as though I get out of bed and rush down to the internet cafe to see what has been posted.

Actually, this is an example of why TV is so great. There is nowhere else I could go to get the vast range of responses that have been posted on here, and there have been some really good suggestions.

Cheers.

  • Like 1
Posted

I have two thoughts (well sometimes even more!)

One was brought on while reading the the OP and my eye fell on the tube on the desk UHU The All Purpose Adhesive:)I don't think it necessarily helps to have lots of things do.Boredom and tedium can come as much from routine activities even if they fill a day. It would seem that in some way you have lost a 'sense of purpose'. If you made the decision to come to Thailand you must have had a purpose in doing that and were presumably enthusiastic to do so? I am priviliged to have youngish children. It is impossible not have purposes with them around. Also I see my wife building her businesses with determination and enthusiasm; and we all laugh a lot.

The second thought is that while you may be pretty healthy, I wonder if you are not just tired?

Life here can be quite enervating. No accident you see Thai people asleep at all kinds of moments. While I love the early mornings and the sunsets I have learned to make sure I get enough sleep

Just thoughts

I was initially going to say that my life is far from routine, but perhaps I need to consider the deeper meaning and see if it's applicable.

Thanks.

Posted

If you really still have to go to an internet cafe to get online, then you need a challenge: get a home connection. What's stopping you?

Posted

If you really still have to go to an internet cafe to get online, then you need a challenge: get a home connection. What's stopping you?

I'd rarely leave the house, and I'd just be on the internet all day. Not good.

  • Like 2
Posted

Seeing your TV posting history, the answer's now plain to me. You have no intellectual stimulus from 'real' people. You won't find any respite continuing to live where you are with a Thai wife as you probably have nothing meaningful in common. Move somewhere else, even back to the UK, but choose a different area like the south coast and reestablish contact with a few people from your past life.

Posted

Please keep us posted. Pick up the thread again after a while, let us know what you tried. i can relate to this - not quite the same, few different factors, but...yes.

Stuff i must check, or modify:

- Too much coffee, not enough sleep. For years.

- Vitamins, i dunno, better to improve the nutrition. ayurved? ...need a genuine one, bona fide.

- Thyroid and testoterone. i wonder whether i can get those tests done with the medical insurance paying.

... - Exercise.....becomes more possible when i'm in Thailand than where i am now. // retirement - yes please, month to go.

  • Like 1
Posted

To the OP -- it's certainly not easy to give you any helpful advice. From what you've told us, it's fairly

obvious that your circumstances are very real and daunting for you. My ideas may not help at all, but

over the last 7 years since I retired I have had brief periods when I felt very much like you describe.

Of course, everyone is different, but some of the solutions I've found may give you some useful ideas.

The term libido comes to mind. An elusive term which is sometimes described as the center of male

enthusiasm. Some men take Andriol Testocaps to boost their libido, which is often used to mean their

sex drive, but actual a boosted libido significantly affects other male drives, such as enthusiasm, energy

and desire to accomplish something useful.

You might ask your doctor about Andriol Testocaps, which is not a drug but doses of testosterone, a

naturally occurring hormone in all mammals.

I have True Vision cable TV, but I watch TV very little. Other than a few science/nature/educational type

programs, for me most of the programming is a huge waste of time, provides absolutely no "satisfaction

in accomplishment" and adds very little to my quality of life in retirement.

I started out making long lists of things I wanted (or needed) to accomplish; here are some examples --

(1) write an adventure novel based on my own experiences

(2) reorganize my bookshelves

(3) reply to a stupid letter from the IRS

(4) Set up a filing system for all my important papers

(5) Tidy, sort and file all my accumulated papers

(6) Write letters (snail mail) to old buddies who lack email addresses

(7) Write to XYZ Bank about their recent very poor customer service

(8) Sort, tidy and file papers

(9) Prepare materials to study Thai, Japanese and Ilonggo with my wife

(10) Research performance & price of SUV tires (Nitto, Ohtsu, Sumitomo, etc)

Then I started dividing my "Items to Accomplish List" into short-term and long term. Then at least once or

twice a week, I update my list, add some new items and delete those that are completed.

The end result is, I have no time to get bored. I'm always doing something. If I get tired of a project bcoz

it is taking to long, I simple choose another. I'm the owner of my list and since the content is totally at my

discretion, I control all my own activities and pastimes in my daily life. Of course, when making my list I do

confer with my wife about what she wants accomplished and any scheduling issues.

For me, it's important to be in charge of my own life -- I don't want to have doctors or drugs in control of

my life like millions of my fellow countrymen. Being in control of my own life give me the satisfaction of

taking charge of my own happiness and my own future.

I simply do the things that satisfy me. And my main reward is satisfaction in accomplishment.

Hope this helps... even a little.

I am surprised to hear you relieve boredom by doing things I would consider boring. Of course, that only goes to show the differences between peoples.

I agree with you about the differences between people.

You may consider writing a novel or studying languages boring, but for me watching football, baseball or basketball is super boring.

Or watching fishing or golf on TV -- for me, about as exciting as watching grass grow... but to each his own.

Most amazing is to see adults who spend huge amounts of time doing things like computer games or sitting in a bar drinking beer

everyday. I ask myself -- If I did this my whole life, would I die any smarter than when I was born? If the answer is no, I purposely

avoid those kinds of activities. But some folks seem to be happy with that.

A lot of my fellow Americans can't speak anything but English, and even in English cannot write a grammatically correct sentence.

Nor can they find London on a map, but if they're satisfied with that level of mental acuity, why should we bad-mouth them?... LOL.

well, research, writing and studying are two of the things I do; but the filing, replying to stupid letters and poor service, reorganizing bookshelves, tidying and sorting papers (twice), writing snail mail, etc., I find boring. My files/books are digital, I phone dinosaurs, and I circumvent stupidity. I can pass the time through research and writing, and even watching sports. However, I need to get out to avoid boredom.

Looks like you have a good plan...

However, you would play hail trying to circumvent the stupidity of the Internal Revenue Service. And you can't call dinosaurs if

all you have is their snail mail addresses. Also, if you get too far behind in your filing sooner or later you're sure to find yourself

deep kimchee when you can't find an important document you need.

I'd say your plan still has a few loop-holes.

Posted

A lot interesting things here, but what is holding you off to check Testosterone, Free Testosterone, maybe Estrogen, Thyroid hormones and posting them?

Anyway no one knows your real name. Than we could focus on that or exclude it.

Posted

What you describe sounds like mild depression.

Do check your testosterone levels as this can sometimes be linked to low T.

If not, you might consider counseling -- some short term therapy to help you deal with the depression. It may have to do with the particular challenges this phase of life presents. At this age, you know most of your life is behind you and you have also seen through a lot of the things that used to attract you/seem like a source of happiness. You can't get excited about them because you know their limits already. ..been there/done that/not all it's cracked up to be.

That's natural. But you need to find other avenues of meaning for yourself to successfully navigate late middle age/start of old age.

It is especially hard due to the tremendous emphasis on youth our culture places. It doesn't really offer us any solutions other than to try to stave off aging/look and act as young as possible, which is not really the healthiest approach. It was easier in traditional societies which accepted aging and put value on older people's experience of life.

The problem you describe is the "inability to suspend disbelief", in the field of literature.

Yes, we do see through things that we once were not able to see, unless we were able to see them when we were young.

These existential angst issues have been prominent in my thinking throughout my life.

For the OP, I would not be so quick to say that this is depression. Somehow, one needs to come to terms with life after 50, or 60, or 70. FIrst, to do this, one must come to terms with the idea of endings.

You do know what Sophocles said, I hope:

SOCRATES: Never mind him, said Socrates. Now for you, my jury. I want to explain to you how it seems to me natural that a man who has really devoted his life to philosophy should be cheerful in the face of death, and confident of finding the greatest blessing in the next world when his life is finished. I will try to make clear to you, Simmias and Cebes, how this can be so.

Ordinary people seem not to realize that those who really apply themselves in the right way to philosophy are directly and of their own accord preparing themselves for dying and death. If this is true, and they have actually been looking forward to death all their lives, it would of course be absurd to be troubled when the thing comes for which they have so long been preparing and looking forward.

SIMMIAS: Simmias laughed and said, Upon my word, Socrates, you have made me laugh, though I was not at all in the mood for it.

(55555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555)

Posted (edited)

And, please do not forget:

You really do need to find something, and pursue something, that you are passionate about.

Screw the testosterone/estrogen/glop.

This is not as important as finding that which you would die to be able to do.

For me, it is one thing.

For you, it might be another.

But, if you can find it, you will not be bothered with lacking motivation, and may wish to live a lot longer.

And, may also kick yourself for not finding this thing earlier in your life.

Edited by CaptainTyphoon
Posted

Finally, people around Thailand may think you cannot get SAD.

Just because we are not located up around the arctic circle.

But, you can.

I notice that around January, when the cold weather comes, and you never seem to get warm,

And the rays of the sun do not come from on high, then one's mood begins to dip.

My advice is to put in a very hot shower, with plenty of water. This is actually what I have done this month. I put in a 8000watt water heater. And, I plan to add another hot water heater of 8000watts so that I can have plenty of hot water when I am taking a shower. 16000 watts should give me 12 liters per minute of 50 degree water. Don't laugh. A hot shower in the Thai winter season is a HUGE lift to one's mood, and does not cost much.

Another thing, before winter comes, try to invest in a heat pump instead of a regular air con unit.

Unfortunately, where I live, I have one that is fairly new, and I do not need to change to a new unit.

But, when I do, I am going to invest in a heat pump, so that I can have heat in the winter time.

If I keep the inside of my house at 26 degrees, then I will feel tons better, believe me!

Also, try to make yourself comfortable in every area, and also try to enjoy things that are simple and easy to enjoy.

I love to eat, so I eat cheap wonderful food that is abundant where I live.

I like to study, so I study where I am, which is also a place of study, and so I am fortunate in this.

DONT DRINK! Drinking is a huge depressant, and kills the urge to do fun things.

Dont womanize! This does the same thing as the drink.

OK, just a few tips here.

Now, I hope this improves your mood a bit.

Bye.

No need to thank me.

Posted

I forgot:

Try to do something for others that you like to do.

For example: I just learned that I really like to teach English to smart students. Really smart students, not the other kind.

Anyway, so now I teach for free. using Skype, to students in the USA who want to do better on their English tests.

I find that this is a very positive experience for me, because I realize I am making an impact that might help to improve someone else's life just a tiny bit.

This is why I do not charge, because I am fairly sure I am getting much in return.

So, if you English is good enough in the vocabulary department and grammar department, then try it, you might like it.

Don't worry, my grammar and usage and vocabulary is not as bad as you see here.

Maybe worse.

The spelling is perfect however.

Posted (edited)

Finally, people around Thailand may think you cannot get SAD.

Just because we are not located up around the arctic circle.

But, you can.

I notice that around January, when the cold weather comes, and you never seem to get warm,

And the rays of the sun do not come from on high, then one's mood begins to dip.

My advice is to put in a very hot shower, with plenty of water. This is actually what I have done this month. I put in a 8000watt water heater. And, I plan to add another hot water heater of 8000watts so that I can have plenty of hot water when I am taking a shower. 16000 watts should give me 12 liters per minute of 50 degree water. Don't laugh. A hot shower in the Thai winter season is a HUGE lift to one's mood, and does not cost much.

Another thing, before winter comes, try to invest in a heat pump instead of a regular air con unit.

Unfortunately, where I live, I have one that is fairly new, and I do not need to change to a new unit.

But, when I do, I am going to invest in a heat pump, so that I can have heat in the winter time.

If I keep the inside of my house at 26 degrees, then I will feel tons better, believe me!

Also, try to make yourself comfortable in every area, and also try to enjoy things that are simple and easy to enjoy.

I love to eat, so I eat cheap wonderful food that is abundant where I live.

I like to study, so I study where I am, which is also a place of study, and so I am fortunate in this.

DONT DRINK! Drinking is a huge depressant, and kills the urge to do fun things.

Dont womanize! This does the same thing as the drink.

OK, just a few tips here.

Now, I hope this improves your mood a bit.

Bye.

No need to thank me.

16000 watts on a single phase domestic supply is about 70 amps! Good luck with that.

The Skype teaching idea is great. Feeling you're doing something to help someone definitely helps raise your spirits.

Edited by laobali
Posted (edited)

Finally, people around Thailand may think you cannot get SAD.

Just because we are not located up around the arctic circle.

But, you can.

I notice that around January, when the cold weather comes, and you never seem to get warm,

And the rays of the sun do not come from on high, then one's mood begins to dip.

My advice is to put in a very hot shower, with plenty of water. This is actually what I have done this month. I put in a 8000watt water heater. And, I plan to add another hot water heater of 8000watts so that I can have plenty of hot water when I am taking a shower. 16000 watts should give me 12 liters per minute of 50 degree water. Don't laugh. A hot shower in the Thai winter season is a HUGE lift to one's mood, and does not cost much.

Another thing, before winter comes, try to invest in a heat pump instead of a regular air con unit.

Unfortunately, where I live, I have one that is fairly new, and I do not need to change to a new unit.

But, when I do, I am going to invest in a heat pump, so that I can have heat in the winter time.

If I keep the inside of my house at 26 degrees, then I will feel tons better, believe me!

Also, try to make yourself comfortable in every area, and also try to enjoy things that are simple and easy to enjoy.

I love to eat, so I eat cheap wonderful food that is abundant where I live.

I like to study, so I study where I am, which is also a place of study, and so I am fortunate in this.

DONT DRINK! Drinking is a huge depressant, and kills the urge to do fun things.

Dont womanize! This does the same thing as the drink.

OK, just a few tips here.

Now, I hope this improves your mood a bit.

Bye.

No need to thank me.

16000 watts on a single phase domestic supply is about 70 amps! Good luck with that.

The Skype teaching idea is great. Feeling you're doing something to help someone definitely helps raise your spirits.

1. Yes, I cannot recommend this highly enough! Being able to pass to others a bit of the accumulated knowledge we worked hard for is a very pleasurable experience, and tells us that maybe our time has not been wasted.

2. I have been thinking about the Single Phase question. What we have here is 3 phase coming to the side of the building, but single phase to the room.

According to the Eltron people, I could instal two single phase units. And, really, this make perfect sense, because otherwise there would need to be warnings on the water heaters which stated that if there are two people who wanted to take showers at the same time in different bathrooms, then this is not possible with single phase. However, we know this is not the case.

So, LaoXiong, what say you, Sir?

This is important, because, as I say, a lot of hot water in the winter time can make the difference between feeling good and feeling full of lethargy.

Edited by CaptainTyphoon
Posted

captain typhoon stole what i was going to say.... in a way, if all other checks are clear (clinical depression, blood work, etc) i would say that u are waht my parents say : jaded or world weary. been there done that boring over and over again. nothing externally excites you so now is the time to turn to internal excitements.

perhaps its time to turn to more 'spiritual' events. working with people that are difficult, you have to solve problems that can help them (handicapped person needing something that needs others to facilitate, building something, working one on one with a problematic child or with a handicap. its amazing what purpose in life gives to you.

also, some people are just that way. my mother in law lost her daughter during pregnancy, and never got over it; she also was a sort of 'depressive' personality prior to that. and with age its gotten worse along with the mild diabetes. she's 85 and has no enthusiasm in spite of grandkids living close by, and all the good things a kibbutz offers to senior citizens. an other 85 year old lost her son in lebanon, and , being a naturally 'happy' personality, amazingly enough, became a reiki healer. and she' amazining. she swims, she takes her grandkids for midnite walks when the moon is full, to see night cactuses, she is still hugnry for life. she's like a tiny bundle of energy that radiates outward. both women went through the haulacaust, and many wars. neither are religious. so not sure how each one ended up in the way they did.

i think sometimes the mind just gets tired; we are overwhelmed with stimulation constantly nowadays, eveyrthing is easily obtained and instant so there is a loss of satisfaction that you would have when making or doing something the slow hard way. so maybe even a week\month in a wat like the thais do, would give your mind some 'down' time or 'reformatting' time; than start by doing things that aren't projects for your house or your self, but for someone else. cleaning up someone else's house is often more satisfying and fulfilling than doing your own; it engages the brain in different ways then doing your own routine 'stuff';

btw, natural ginseng etc are supposedly good for things like this. perhaps a visit to an alternative medical advisor is in order if all other medical problems have been ruled out.

  • Like 2
Posted

Hi The key point in this is that you retired not that you turned 60. Many retired people fell like this. Left with out a purpose or plans for life. One moment busy everyday then suddenly nothing, no alarms, no meetings, no deadlines, no expectations placed upon you. ( I see no mention of a spouse or anything) One can feel that there is no purpose to anything after having led a busy life. I was fortunate so I thought to Retire at 55 and soon found that there was nothing driving my life I had money and friends but no purpose to my life I partied. I tried to socialize etc but there were no demands upon me as there had been when I was in business. A bucket list would have been fine if I had had someone to cross off things with but alas no. I got really down in the dumps. Then my youngest daughter said . "For gods sake dad do something constructive. Write a book, work for a charity, learn a musical instrument or something.

So I started a business selling stuff on EBAY, organized my days on a business footing. I also took up the guitar again. I soon had a new lease on life. I found lots of things to do and met similar retired people here whom I play golf with and socialize with (I am not the third or fifth wheel here.) I got a life back with purpose and a reason to get up everyday. I have since met and married a wonderful Thai woman with a young son who adores me for some reason. I am now 63 and the last 6-7 years have been some of the best in my life. So give your life some purpose. You might have to push hard to "bump start" your life again but it's worth it.

Posted

Try exercise for 1 hour every day. Of course every day may be impossible but make it a goal. The chemicals that infuse your brain will do wonders for you and once your strength and vigour is up, you will find life more interesting. Get a medical exam. Be sure your Blood pressure and sugar levels are normal.

Hay fever ? Try eradicating any signs of the black mould growing on the sides of buildings. Use bleach. This mould can be very damaging to you lungs and since it is common in moist climates such as Thailand, eradicating it may help. My Thai wife and daughter reported that they had breathing difficulties for two winters prior to my arrival. I eradicated the mould from our two houses side by side and adjacent properties. I painted the homes with an anti mould paint. Their asthma symptoms have not returned. This mould is feared in California and they go to great lengths to eliminate it - even tearing walls down. This mould is very damaging to children.

  • Like 1
Posted

<script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script>

Finally, people around Thailand may think you cannot get SAD.

Just because we are not located up around the arctic circle.

But, you can.

I notice that around January, when the cold weather comes, and you never seem to get warm,

And the rays of the sun do not come from on high, then one's mood begins to dip.

My advice is to put in a very hot shower, with plenty of water. This is actually what I have done this month. I put in a 8000watt water heater. And, I plan to add another hot water heater of 8000watts so that I can have plenty of hot water when I am taking a shower. 16000 watts should give me 12 liters per minute of 50 degree water. Don't laugh. A hot shower in the Thai winter season is a HUGE lift to one's mood, and does not cost much.

Another thing, before winter comes, try to invest in a heat pump instead of a regular air con unit.

Unfortunately, where I live, I have one that is fairly new, and I do not need to change to a new unit.

But, when I do, I am going to invest in a heat pump, so that I can have heat in the winter time.

If I keep the inside of my house at 26 degrees, then I will feel tons better, believe me!

Also, try to make yourself comfortable in every area, and also try to enjoy things that are simple and easy to enjoy.

I love to eat, so I eat cheap wonderful food that is abundant where I live.

I like to study, so I study where I am, which is also a place of study, and so I am fortunate in this.

DONT DRINK! Drinking is a huge depressant, and kills the urge to do fun things.

Dont womanize! This does the same thing as the drink.

OK, just a few tips here.

Now, I hope this improves your mood a bit.

Bye.

No need to thank me.

LPG gas heater would be better no big cables.Does anyone know where to get an aircon that heats as well like the ones in Greece.

Posted

you are what u eat !!! eat rubbish and u will feel rubbish ... give your body the right fuel and see what happens ...perhaps going and helping people less fortunate than yourself may also help u realize life is not that bad ...

  • Like 1
Posted

I am 67 lived here in CM 6 years, retired, and feel somewhat the same this past couple years.

I think part of it is where I iive now (3 years) our house if 15-20 min down Hang Dong road near BigC. When I lived in CM centre I walked all over the place, 2-4 hrs a day. Love restaurants and reading while eating or just having a tea. People watching is a hobby, I would stop at an interesting intersection and watch people drive by 4-5 on a motorbike etc. I can be a loner by nature but walking around and visiting restaurants at least every 2nd day would meet some really interesting people that gave me a a lift.

Since I started motor biking due to my location I quit walking. Not only do I find it dangerous (1 accident in Feb, uncounscious +1hr, 3 nites in hospital, never saw who hit me). Also, cannot be bothered most days to go to town as I enjoy drinking in the evening and refuse to drive under the influence.

This may all work out as we are planning to build a home on the back of the GFs store and sell the house. It might take another year or two. We/She have lots of equity in the house and I am teaching her how to deal with the banks (she is in charge, not the banks as she has tons of equity in our home, some decent assets, excellent credit history).

The first 2 guys/bankers she talked to knew shit and I would send her back to have another go at them. It gets her frustrated but she is learning that she is the boss with her current financial position and the bank WANTS to lend to people like her, that is how they make money. Working with and teaching her about this stuff gives me a real lift, and she is steadily gaining confidence and knowledge. Once we get going on the construction I will be once again extremely motivated, then moving back to CM centre a new enviornment more condusive to my personality.

I have found that periods of boredom over the years was always followed by an extended period of time of extreme activity, and good activity. The trick is to be patient AND keep your eyes (and mind) open to the many opportunities that are always crossing our paths. This boredom period is often a waiting period prior to many changes that will follow if a person is open to them.

Proper diet and rest, quality vitamins (often taken every other day), exposure to sunshine on bare skin 1/2 hr a day, quality food AND water will all help keep you in shape while you are looking around for the next good thing IMO.

Opportunities will come. All the best!

Doug

Posted (edited)

Thanks for all the replies. Very interesting.

Have to say I'm a little surprised at the number of people that think infidelity is OK though. Perhaps that could be the topic for another thread.

Yes that's pretty disgusting, feel a bit low- no problem just cheat on your wife that will perk you up! You have to remember some on here are ex sex tourists who never seem to have quite got it out of their systems

Edited by jacky54

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