Pressure to marry

[louse1953]

In most of Asia there will always be pressure for a girl to marry, unmarried is unsavoury and families can still sometimes loose face over it. The conversation with the old bats will go something like this: "your daughter is 25 now, is she going to get married, why not? What's wrong with her?"

So the blame for the daughter not being married could be becAuse of poor upbringing and no man is interested or refuse to commit, not arractive (not good genes), or even as far as the family. This is obviously not the case in modern times but there are plenty of families who will feel ashamed in front of the old fuddy duddies who make such comments (questions). It's a loose loose question and in fact an insult to ask it, because whatever the answer is would most likely be a lie to not loose face, of which the question asked will know, and the answered will know the question asker thinks whatever she says is a lie as well, even if it isn't.

It's quite a touchy topic. More so in places like india. But of course all over China and South East Asian countries.

However, if the pressure is coming from an Issan family in regards to a farang-thai relationship, then throw all of what I said out the window, as it'll all be about securing that sinsot, house, fixed monthly support income. Nothing else, those people have no shame and just want your hard earned £££.

Last paragraph is racist and bs.Pathetic comment really and shows your lack of knowledge.

[CMCMANGOMAN]

Hahaha... the Internet ain't what it used to be my clueless friend and besides, you just don't marry a Thai woman... you marry the whole famn damily.

[canarysun]

Stay single just like myself! 50 years old and you can come & go as you like and the cost of living is as "cheap as chips " on your own! Why complicate your life? F.J x

[NativeSon360]

Always a risk. If you're asking, you must be considering going ahead with it. Of course from her side, her family knows she's not getting any younger, so they try to "help" by putting on some pressure.

The fact that your Thai lady has met your family, in your home country, is a big plus, and congratulations to you both, for that phenomenal achivement.

However, if you haven't already married the lady, by now, then there are obvious doubts. If you're considering marry the lady, only because her family is applying pressure to her, then I'd suggest you first, take a few steps backwards, re-assess your own life values, then make a commitment, based upon the results of that assessment.

THINK.......about it, and selfishly so. The decision you make, and actions you take now, will profoundly affect the rest of your life, and her's as well. Time to become friends, as well as lovers.

Be well-advised, an attempt @ giving birth to children, especially for a woman, in her late 30's, is quite risky. The miscarriage probability percentage rate is very high.

Indeed, you can either marry her, and deal with the reality of her family "perpetually" sticking their noses, into the business of your lives together; or she can "stand-up" alone (for the both you) to her parents, by openly rejecting their pressure, on her own behalf (unlikely); or you can simply decide to "quietly", but suddenly walk away.

I know, it's a real dilemma! Been there

[inwardglee]

Women want to marry if it is a win situation for them, not if they lose by it.

Example: My son (half Thai by blood) was in Thailand for one year studying at Chulalongkorn university, and got acquainted to a Thai student. He was later able to get her a studentship in Europe, where she finished her Master. Himself making 10'000 USD monthly, and herself making more right from the start in Europe, she does not want to marry without special contracts.

In case of divorce, she would lose half of the accumulated money in the time of marriage to him. Though she would have gained the nationality of a Western country, with its social security network, its medical system, its free travelling, its democratic rights, she still does not want to get into that trade …

Women are rational.

Now, imagine if the same woman would make no or only little income. She would wish to marry, as then it is a win situation: she gets a nationality that gives her advantages, better life, and in case of divorce (which is highly probable) she gets half of the accumulated money. Her man being ruined, herself being rewarded.

Women are rational.

Men are not. They keep marrying to get ruined later. Oh, romance, it blinds the eyes.

[NativeSon360]

Women want to marry if it is a win situation for them, not if they lose by it.

Example: My son (half Thai by blood) was in Thailand for one year studying at Chulalongkorn university, and got acquainted to a Thai student. He was later able to get her a studentship in Europe, where she finished her Master. Himself making 10'000 USD monthly, and herself making more right from the start in Europe, she does not want to marry without special contracts.

In case of divorce, she would lose half of the accumulated money in the time of marriage to him. Though she would have gained the nationality of a Western country, with its social security network, its medical system, its free travelling, its democratic rights, she still does not want to get into that trade …

Women are rational.

Now, imagine if the same woman would make no or only little income. She would wish to marry, as then it is a win situation: she gets a nationality that gives her advantages, better life, and in case of divorce (which is highly probable) she gets half of the accumulated money. Her man being ruined, herself being rewarded.

Women are rational.

Men are not. They keep marrying to get ruined later. Oh, romance, it blinds the eyes.

I concur with the spirit of meaning, however try on this perspective point of view. Romance doesn't blind the eyes, but testosterone definitely does. Talk about lives being ruined. Consider the following.

The tragedy is when some old man from the west, comes to Thailand and "falls" in love with some girl, who is young enough to be his granddaughter, then proceeds to make babies, with that baby-girl.

That "farang" phenomenon is a total catastrophy, baking in the oven.

[benalibina]

In most of Asia there will always be pressure for a girl to marry, unmarried is unsavoury and families can still sometimes loose face over it. The conversation with the old bats will go something like this: "your daughter is 25 now, is she going to get married, why not? What's wrong with her?"

So the blame for the daughter not being married could be becAuse of poor upbringing and no man is interested or refuse to commit, not arractive (not good genes), or even as far as the family. This is obviously not the case in modern times but there are plenty of families who will feel ashamed in front of the old fuddy duddies who make such comments (questions). It's a loose loose question and in fact an insult to ask it, because whatever the answer is would most likely be a lie to not loose face, of which the question asked will know, and the answered will know the question asker thinks whatever she says is a lie as well, even if it isn't.

It's quite a touchy topic. More so in places like india. But of course all over China and South East Asian countries.

However, if the pressure is coming from an Issan family in regards to a farang-thai relationship, then throw all of what I said out the window, as it'll all be about securing that sinsot, house, fixed monthly support income. Nothing else, those people have no shame and just want your hard earned £££.

Last paragraph is racist and bs.Pathetic comment really and shows your lack of knowledge.

No, he should have replaced Issan by .....some Thai rural uneducated family, lacking any morals/ethics/honesty and only in it to serve their own families, at any cost.

[SateliteDish]

Thanks for the input gents, it's been very useful, I didn't know about the "village weddings" and wasn't familiar with the 50/50 before and after ruling.

If it doesn't work out there's always Walking Street until another office girl shows up.