Thai opinion: Children need more than wise words - they need examples

[webfact]

STREETWISE
Children need more than wise words - they need examples
Achara Deboonme

BANGKOK: -- It was a touching story from the Philippine Daily Inquirer: A 12-year-old girl asked visiting Pope Francis on Sunday, "Why does God allow such things to happen?"

"Many children have been abandoned by their parents," she told the pontiff. "Many of them have fallen victims to evil things, like drugs and prostitution."

Instead of giving a direct answer, the pope advised his young audience to learn how to weep. He also called on them to learn how to love. Real love, he said, is about "loving and letting yourself be loved".

Finally he explained the "three languages" - to think well, to feel well and to do well.

I was moved, but these children can best learn these lessons only by being shown examples. There are plenty available.

The deadly attack on journalists at French satirical magazine Charlie Hebdo elicited shock and grief around the globe. There was anger, too, which has fuelled a wave of anti-Islamic sentiment against Muslim migrants in European countries. Fortunately, the majority has rejected that generalising response. The millions who marched through Paris with world leaders were demonstrating their unity against terrorism, not Muslims.

Six decades ago, when Germany was tightly controlled by the Nazi's Gestapo, it was Jews who were declared the general enemy. But not everyone turned against them. "The Book Thief", a 2006 novel inspired by true stories, tells of the lessons that 12-year-old girl Liesel learns when her foster parents decide to hide a Jewish man from the authorities, risking their lives to do so. Liesel learns from them how to differentiate the good people from the bad.

Another example can be found in Halina Birenbaum, a Polish girl who was sent to concentration camps during World War II, including the infamous Auschwitz. Aged 11, she survived the hardships in Nazi-occupied Warsaw shielded by the love of her family, chiefly her mother. At Auschwitz, she met some good people, including a few German-speaking guards. Neither books nor films nor even a visit to the camp-turned-museum can evoke the depth of hardship and horror suffered by those imprisoned there. Yet the young girl endured it all with a heart that remained open and hopeful. When the camp was liberated, she was just 15.

In her memoir "Hope is the Last to Die", written after she had moved to Israel and started her own family, Birenbaum detailed the hardships and the kindness she had encountered in the camp. The recounting is emotional but without hatred. She sets a good example of how to see people as they are, even while living under unbearable conditions; how to disregard the bad and how to love the good in people regardless of their nationality or religion.

I was also touched by the attitude of the lead character in "Ida", Sunday's opening film of the Polish Film Festival in Bangkok. An orphaned girl brought up in a convent is about take her vows as a Catholic nun when she discovers that she actually comes from a Jewish family. She remains impassive as she's told that all were killed, except her, who was left at the convent. The news takes her on a quest to find their grave, then into a brush with earthly pleasures, but nothing dissuades her from the determination to become a nun. She experiences real life with an open mind and decides to move on.

The mood lightened during "Walesa", the second of seven films being screened in this week's festival. Poles in the audience giggled throughout the movie, tickled by Lech Walesa's puns. They were silent only when footage of the hardships in the 1980s and 1990s appeared on screen.

It reminded me of comments I'd heard from Poles, that the country's young generation don't share the collective memory of those difficult times under Communism.

It's fascinating to consider how Thais today think about their history.

Channel 3 is currently airing a new series, based on a novel about Bang Rajan, the frontier village that was devastated by the Burmese before they marched on to sack Ayutthaya. Well, the series should stir up plenty of nationalist sentiment, with the Burmese depicted as the villains.

The timing could be unfortunate, though, with Thailand seeking to play a leading role in uniting all Asean nations as the Asean Economic Community era gets underway. We might ask ourselves how hatred towards our neighbour will help accomplish this dream.

It is also fascinating to consider what youngsters today think about social division, with all sorts of hatred swirling about. When I tweeted a report of Yingluck saying she had been impeached three times, a follower responded "Good to know she can count". (And Yingluck is being called far worse things than a child.)

The Constitution Drafting Committee might not be to everyone's taste, but it should win our backing for its proposal that "hate speech" be

illegal. They agreed on this last week, citing the need to curb abuse of

freedom of expression that creates social divisions and hatred among citizens.

Restrictions on hate speech will be imposed on all media, including the social media.

However, there remains the question - and it applies to many other things in Thailand - of how this can be enforced.

In an echo of the words of our Lord Buddha, Pope Francis told us to think well, to feel well and to do well. It is up to us, adults, to give good examples to our children. We face a dismal future if our children do not know how to understand, let alone love, others.

Source: http://www.nationmultimedia.com/opinion/Children-need-more-than-wise-words--they-need-exam-30252263.html


-- The Nation 2015-01-20

[Thian]

What good examples do children get in Thailand? Everybody is being selfish here, even "hi-so" rich Thai don't even know what "good manners" are.

They even are too dumb to use the indicators of the car while driving in a crowded city like BKK.

[WhamBam]

Who is going to set these examples?

In my day it was not only parents who set examples. We had heroes. True heroes. Historical heroes too. Douglas Bader, Nelson and so many others. We could relate to these heroes and learn examples from them. Our parents may not always have been the best examples, but we learned from them about honesty and integrity - often with a clip around the ear, or more.

Learn about love? Love is often something many of us took for granted within a family setting. Yet love is not what life is about. Life is about hardship, exultation, winning, losing. Fighting with your peers and learning where you stood in the hierarchy. And so much more.

I cannot see many good examples being set here in Thailand, be they love, honesty, integrity and so much more until the system sets itself up to show good examples.

Where are the examples when poor people are being jailed for pitiful offences and millionaires getting off scot free. Where is the love in that for the poor that children can take examples from?

Someone needs to take the bull by the horns here and be a leader everyone can look up to.

[NongKhaiKid]

Wise words are ten a penny but good examples are as scarce as hen's teeth.

[chainarong]

At one time the roll models came from the so called Hi-So rich , unfortunately over decades their has been so much corruption , moral values eroded and the greed factor ruling Thai family life that any thing is the norm, also over the decades the rich have got richer the poor very much poorer and where you hear of poor families sending their children to be prostitues in tourist area's just go's to show the desperation and reliance on other forms of income as the Government doesn't help, the percentage of poor which would be at lest 80% of Thai's indicates Thailand might be the HUB of everything, but Thailand is still third world at this level.

[NongKhaiKid]

Who is going to set these examples?

In my day it was not only parents who set examples. We had heroes. True heroes. Historical heroes too. Douglas Bader, Nelson and so many others. We could relate to these heroes and learn examples from them. Our parents may not always have been the best examples, but we learned from them about honesty and integrity - often with a clip around the ear, or more.

Learn about love? Love is often something many of us took for granted within a family setting. Yet love is not what life is about. Life is about hardship, exultation, winning, losing. Fighting with your peers and learning where you stood in the hierarchy. And so much more.

I cannot see many good examples being set here in Thailand, be they love, honesty, integrity and so much more until the system sets itself up to show good examples.

Where are the examples when poor people are being jailed for pitiful offences and millionaires getting off scot free. Where is the love in that for the poor that children can take examples from?

Someone needs to take the bull by the horns here and be a leader everyone can look up to.

Heroes - William Wallace, The Bruce, Robert Burns and my Grandad;

A normal ordinary family where right and wrong was on display and hammered home.

Thai variety - we have name and money so will get you into education and passes you don't deserve and a job. Our name and money will get you out of any proles with the BIB. Thai family values and love.

[worgeordie]

The Stranglers were right "No more heroes anymore".

regards Worgeordie

[Thailand]

Recently Thai children will have learned that if you are not getting your own way stage a coup,hostile takeover etc!

[wabothai]

Name me one rollmodel (exept a wannabe "superstar") and I will fly the flag.

[Fat Haggis]

Who is going to set these examples?

In my day it was not only parents who set examples. We had heroes. True heroes. Historical heroes too. Douglas Bader, Nelson and so many others. We could relate to these heroes and learn examples from them. Our parents may not always have been the best examples, but we learned from them about honesty and integrity - often with a clip around the ear, or more.

Learn about love? Love is often something many of us took for granted within a family setting. Yet love is not what life is about. Life is about hardship, exultation, winning, losing. Fighting with your peers and learning where you stood in the hierarchy. And so much more.

I cannot see many good examples being set here in Thailand, be they love, honesty, integrity and so much more until the system sets itself up to show good examples.

Where are the examples when poor people are being jailed for pitiful offences and millionaires getting off scot free. Where is the love in that for the poor that children can take examples from?

Someone needs to take the bull by the horns here and be a leader everyone can look up to.

Heroes - William Wallace, The Bruce, Robert Burns and my Grandad;

A normal ordinary family where right and wrong was on display and hammered home.

Thai variety - we have name and money so will get you into education and passes you don't deserve and a job. Our name and money will get you out of any proles with the BIB. Thai family values and love.

You're a Jock then?

[Jarearn]

This article reminds me of a book I really enjoyed by Viktor Frankl called "Man's Search for Meaning", detailing his time during the Great War, before, during and after. In it he spoke of he need to have a Statue of Responsibility, as there is a need in the world to balance the liberty celebrated by the iconic Statue of Liberty, and how we must all learn to be responsible as well as free. He showed that it is possible to due this even in the most dire of circumstances. We can find great examples and can learn to be one. Remember to practice the four great virtues called "Brahma Viharas" in Sanskrit, and similarly called in Thai with slightly different pronunciation. They are: friendliness, compassion, delight, and equanimity.

Personally one area in which I see a great need for reform for being a good example for the children is with respect to drug laws. Current drug prohibition in general, and specifically with regards to ancient herbal medicine and sacraments including, but not limited, to Cannabis, is so out of touch with the reality of the effects, dangers, and usefulness, that when children see the hypocrisy they lose a lot of respect for the leadership. It is so obvious that it is about corporate greed and control, that it can lead many a youngster to rebel. This is why personally I think it is paramount that we address the subject of cannabis prohibition with great haste, as the current example of corporate greed, and ineffective control strategies filling up prisons is costing vast sums of the public funds and is turning many youngsters into more hardened criminals as they get the chance to learn much from other prisoners whilst in prison. Of course this is not the only issue, but it is certainly one of utmost importance. Cannabis as medicine for many ailments would reduce the dependence on dangerous pharmaceutical. As recreation for adults, it could reduce crime and road accidents through a decreased dependence on alcohol and could reduce lung disease from decreased dependence on tobacco. It was the UN and its failed drug control policies which brought massive prison overcrowding to Thailand, and it is high time that the leadership take responsibility for this and teach the children to learn how to care for their own bodies and minds rather than letting the UN continue in its neo-colonial fashion through the Single Convention on Narcotic Drugs, which has been an abject failure in its stated aim of reducing supply and demand.

Take the example of Colorado where legal cannabis is putting millions of dollars into schools, hospitals and social welfare projects, while also seemingly reduce the crime-rate, which has included a reduction of homicides in the first year after legalization by over 50%. That seems like a great example of reforming laws for the good of the children and the communities. Young people are much more likely to believe you about harder drugs like meth-amphetamines if you tell them the truth about cannabis and adjust the laws accordingly. Now that to me seems like a good place to start, as there seems to be a common consensus that drug use and delinquent behaviour are a problem here in Thailand. Let's use and evidence based harm-reduction strategy, and I bet the kids will start having more respect for each other and for their elders.

Continue with the current profit-based greed driven strategy, and certainly the kids will also want some of that.

[NongKhaiKid]

Who is going to set these examples?

In my day it was not only parents who set examples. We had heroes. True heroes. Historical heroes too. Douglas Bader, Nelson and so many others. We could relate to these heroes and learn examples from them. Our parents may not always have been the best examples, but we learned from them about honesty and integrity - often with a clip around the ear, or more.

Learn about love? Love is often something many of us took for granted within a family setting. Yet love is not what life is about. Life is about hardship, exultation, winning, losing. Fighting with your peers and learning where you stood in the hierarchy. And so much more.

I cannot see many good examples being set here in Thailand, be they love, honesty, integrity and so much more until the system sets itself up to show good examples.

Where are the examples when poor people are being jailed for pitiful offences and millionaires getting off scot free. Where is the love in that for the poor that children can take examples from?

Someone needs to take the bull by the horns here and be a leader everyone can look up to.

Heroes - William Wallace, The Bruce, Robert Burns and my Grandad;

A normal ordinary family where right and wrong was on display and hammered home.

Thai variety - we have name and money so will get you into education and passes you don't deserve and a job. Our name and money will get you out of any proles with the BIB. Thai family values and love.

You're a Jock then?

OOh, what gave me away ?

[Fat Haggis]

The Grandad part!!! 5555