I'm getting milked dry by issan family

[mogo51]

1. Grow some necessaries between the legs

2. As advanced in a previous post, learn the word NO

3. Also as has been suggested, shoot the dog and hit the road.

[Traveling Sailor]

There are several words in the English language that you need to learn and use with conviction. The most important one is "NO". This should be used often and firmly while shaking your head from side to side for emphasis. And, to make it perfectly clear to all within hearing distance, multiple uses interspersed with the Thai equivalent would probably be helpful.

The second one, to be used if the first one does not work, is "GOOD BYE".

Very simple.

All these words require of you is balls.

[monkeycountry]

"Right now we are living at her home"

Moving out and away from the family like most ppl do will automatically solve most of the described problems

[Oigs]

Her name isn't Fon by any chance is it ? Sounds very familiar.

[Powerhousesteve]

And you just let it happen???, some people are born victims, you must be one, just tell them to F/O, it normally works, I have just done it to a few "friends" here, remember, you can only be a victim if you allow it to happen. It is pointless, letting it happen, then asking for advice, get real mate, I know they are experts at making you feel guilty etc, but try to look at the situation like it is happening to someone else, be objective.

[fabphil]

move on..next please ....

[Loptr]

I stopped reading at nice lady from Isaan...

RUN!!!!!!!!!

Good and bad everywhere soft lad.

I'm sure she is a nice lady, but it sounds like the OP can''t afford her AND her family...

Don't try and twist it, you said " I stopped reading at nice lady from Isaan ".

Care to explain you comment?

I was attempting to appease you as you obviously have a partner from the Isaan region of the country... So be it, the truth is that every Isaan princess I have ever met was, wait for it, in a bar, had little to no education and their primary concern is BAHT.... Does that paint all women from Isaan with the same brush, no, it doesn't... Just the ones that ply their trade in the bar industry... Now, where do YOU suspect the OP met his lady?

You happy now?

[jwongbkk]

run, you dumb MF!

once the family starts asking you for money, it's a clear harbinger of the things to come!

run run run before they really milk you dry.

All these Issan greedy pigs! showing off their power at your expense.

if you don't go, you will end up as the joke of the town, paying and letting the family show off, at your expense

been there, done that. it sucks and it's painful to know that you're nothing but a cow for them to milk

[BWPattaya]

Thiis only happens because you allow it. If you aren't strong enough to say "No!" then leave now. The more you give the more they will take.

All the advice you have received here is there for you to act upon. If you don't sort it now don't came back and bleat like a sheep.

[RT555]

Uhhmmm...You're joking right?

[ScarpoFongness4U]

Why is it the girls fault?

Is the OP living in her parents house?

[tonytigerbkk]

Why is it the girls fault?

Is the OP living in her parents house?

Because the girl allows it to happen and does not protect her man.

[Straight8]

First, the girl you view as nice is not nice at all. Wake up. She told you that she knows and understands how you feel but regardless of that she lets her family to rob you anyway. If she felt the way you do towards her, she would simply not put up with what her family does and she would tell you to move somewhere together etc. Using the family as an excuse is not cutting it. It's her family that's ripping you off and her!

Just do this: tell her that you want to move somewhere else with her, not in isaan but another part of Thailand. Tell her that you really like her but you want to be with her and not with her family. Tell her that it is not your responsibility to take care of the entire family. If she understands it and says yes, keep her. If she's clearly against it, that means she's with the family and if you stay, this situation is not going to stop anytime soon. Well it will, when you run out of money. So if she's not down with moving with you, then pack your stuff and run. And find yourself a woman instead of a misguided little thing who views men as financial institutions.

BUT, we are all conceived as "millionaires", WE cannot change that mindset..............

And it's only getting worse as they up the ante.

OP, cut your loses [and I'm sure they are starting to mount] or stay and continue to be milked like the proverbial!!!

Either way, lesson learnt!

[hocuspocus]

I suppose if you got rid of the dog that may save you some money.

[glegolo]

I'm not an expert but I can tell you what I did when I was in a similar situation.

I just told my then future wife, that if she wants her family taken out and fed, she can do it but she has to pay.

If she wouldn't agree to that I would leave her.

Promise you, she did agree and from then on no more family was entertained in those expensive or cheap restaurants either.

If you like that woman and you think you will have a future with her, brake away from her parents house.

You better rent a house at the beginning and thinking of buying later.

But never give in in demands either from the parents or your tirak.

The more they see you give in the more they will demand.

Good Luck to you.

As usual great advise made by one of the very few here on this forum, that actually knows what he is talking about.

Would offer the same advise, but why repeat it.

Good post Costas.

Glegolo

[Straight8]

Why is it the girls fault?

Is the OP living in her parents house?

Because the girl allows it to happen and does not protect her man.

Actually Scarpo has a point. It's not the girls fault or the families fault at all, unless they are using force to get the OP to pay for everything.

Some foreigners in Thailand need to find the nuts and attached them back where they were first placed.

Here we have the OP complaining instead of taking action [in this case getting as far away from these leeches as possibe]. I mean 2 weeks of eating out at the better restaurants and he gets lumbered with the bill. That's not red enough flag to run??

Shame on me if you fool me once, shame on you if you fool me twice...

[williet98248]

Your first mistake was in moving in with the family. Get out of the house and rent your own place. Learn how to say no. (that is your biggest problem). Tell your GF you aren't going to support the family and don't. If she loves you she will move with you and tell the family to back off. If not, take your dog and get outta town. The dog is your only friend. Don't tell anyone you are leaving, just go. The big question is: Why would you stick around in a family that you suspect is swindling and scamming you? Too many good girls in Thailand to put up with this crap.

[manhood]

A very easy way out: dont let you milk!!!!!!!

and just leave that place....otherwise stay and let the show go on!

[joboss]

She looked at my packed and zipped up bag,

Her beautiful face turned into an ugly mask

She screeched at me

“you were only always a meal ticket to me”

I thought quietly to myself that she was good entertainment to the end,

And smiled inward that I had not been convinced to save the family home from termites,

fund her brothers outstanding student loan

and donate to her monks temple.

I still have fond memories,

But memories are all they are.

[ScarpoFongness4U]

Just went back to the OP and saw that they just met.

That is awfully fast to be living with her family?

Are you the one that is broke, and now complaining that the family wants you to start paying for taking their daughter off the market?

And, is she the only daughter, ie., farang bait?

[georgegeorgia]

Yes get rid of the dog !!

[ScarpoFongness4U]

Fon?

Does she spell it Phon?

[Jip99]

Why is it the girls fault?

Is the OP living in her parents house?

Because the girl allows it to happen and does not protect her man.

I think you will find that 'protecting her man' (especially vs family) is not generally in the script for Thai women.

[toolkeeper]

You have no choice. Its either time to "man your battle stations" (in a futile attempt at reason and reasonableness) or "All hands, Abandon ship".

Either way, its going to get ugly. Based upon what you have shared, its the latter course action to take.

Take what you can and abandon all other insignificant stuff. Likely, you will need to change our your id, your presence on the internet, and go into hiding. Only you can gauge the the level of vindictiveness. Proceed with caution. Whatever you do, don't give the "3 strikes and you are out" ultimatums. You are beyond that. Your next step is to walk out and don't look back.

Just my farange genuine, 100% pure copper 2 cents worth of an opinion.

[RoyStratton]

IT IS UP TO YOU MATE,LIKE THEY SAY THERE IS PLENTY OF FISH IN THE SEA,IF YOU WANT TO COME TO CHIANG RAI AND MEET REAL WOMEN JUST LET ME KNOW,THEY ARE NOT AFTER YOUR MONEY

[realenglish1]

Your partly to blame Get rid of the dog or just tell them the money has run out. Or go with them when it comes to replacing something that is broken and you pay for it direclty

Such as the battery Don't just hand out the money. If they see you are controlling it from the mentality they may through a tantram but like all children it will pass

Tell your girlfriend if it does not stop then you will leave her See how quickly she will advise her family to back off

Take control Its that simple Let them belly ache and move to a new place

Also if you are living with them then you should pay them something on a monthly bases They may look at the situation and say "hey he does not help with payments so we will get it another way

Use your head They are human as well and react to similar situations

I speak from Experience since I have been with my lady for 8 years

[davidmann]

welcome to thailand ,all sounds quite normal ,Man UP ,so fare its been cheap ,wait till they ask for house /Land /car ,it will come ,it never stops ,had young english lady friend ,one day i said NO ,she asked me where i learned that word ,soon she was gone ,there all the same

[glegolo]

IT IS UP TO YOU MATE,LIKE THEY SAY THERE IS PLENTY OF FISH IN THE SEA,IF YOU WANT TO COME TO CHIANG RAI AND MEET REAL WOMEN JUST LET ME KNOW,THEY ARE NOT AFTER YOUR MONEY

OMG a troll? Or wake up man.. are you new here or what??

Glegolo

[dotpoom]

With the greatest respect, you hardly need an expert to tell you that maybe you should think about moving out of her family's home.

[Britannia]

Its all very easy really! Issan is a big area, could be Khon Kaen or some village miles away from anywhere. Next!! How old is your girlfriend, if she is less than thirty and without children, then her parents are the Gods, Thai ladies are not like western Women, they could never call their parents bad or say anything offending about them, its against the culture.

The family will never see you as anything other than a money source to be milked, even if you'r with her 50 years.

I cant tell you what to do but here is what I done. I said to my wife (girlfriend at the time) I'm going to live in Chang Mai (800 km from family) if you want to come, up to you and I will take care of you and your children and it stops there. no mother, sisters, brothers aunts uncles and all.

She came and brought her 2 children after a lot of moaning from family, leave him find a new Farang don't take the children out of the village and more, Why wont he make a house for mother her sister said, you should leave him.

We have been together now for 11 years and now living back in the village, but they all got the message, this Farang is not going to be milked. Her daughter when only 13 years old told me that the people in the village had told her when she was 10, she was lucky now had Farang father and can have anything she want.

It worked for me the daughters married well and the son in high school and they treat me with lots of respect, they know when I say no I mean it.

But my wife had to weigh up the two scenarios, take care of her and children or get milked by family, we are still together, in issan village.

But I dont think that will work with a younger Thai lady, my wife was 32.

you have to get as far away as possible from the family, friends and village if it is a village and set the rules or you wont just be milked you will be the doormat as well

You can not impress these people, like so many fools try do. don't worry what they say about you or think about you, they will think the same if you give them millions