Inspire Posted November 28, 2015 Share Posted November 28, 2015 Behind the Thai Smile – What are they really thinking?How Thai girls change with their relationships Anyone who has spent any time in Thailand would be hard pushed not to have found themselves enamored by the warmth and seduction of a pretty Thai ladies smile. Yet behind that smile often lurks many a dark thought. Now inspire is not for one minute placing them all in the same bracket, but there are certainly cultural idiosyncrasy for which there is no escaping. Just as the case in Western worlds.The following article has been prepared by a Thai Lady and discusses how Thai ladies can change based on their relationship statuses, particularly with a foreigner. She may miss the point, she may even have got it wrong, still its a thought provoking read.So, you thought you understood a Thai girl..!?“I have been a little lazy over the last two months and not only that but a lot of things have happened. My cousin has just got married to a Western man and since then she has been acting and talking weird to me. It seems now she has achieved her dream of marrying a farang this now means she is entitled to give me advice. ‘Why don’t you go back to America’ and when I answer because my boyfriend lives here in Pattaya she will retort: ‘Look I like him but you deserve someone better than this, he can’t give you everything you need and there is no future here in Pattaya’. She wants me to think about her future and she cannot see past the solution of marrying a farang so that you can get the live the so called ‘dream life’ away from Thailand. It is so typical of what I experienced from Thais whom have left to live in a new country; they suddenly become experts on advice. I have lived in America for seven years, been there done that. I now know what is important, sure finances, but also happiness.As it stands now I am biting my tongue, it is so condescending to get this kind of advice, and very typical. I know I am part of this Thai girl thing, but I cannot help but be disappointed in how many fellow Thai women act and behave.Read more: http://www.inspirepattaya.com/lifestyle/behind-the-thai-smile-what-are-they-really-thinking/ -- Inspire Pattaya 2015-11-29 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Somtamnication Posted November 28, 2015 Share Posted November 28, 2015 If it was not from a sponsor, I would have labeled this a troll post. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yoram Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 Definition of a smile: to have, produce, or exhibit a smile a : to look or regard with amusement or ridicule smiled at his own folly b : to bestow approval c : to appear pleasant or agreeable However Thais smile is none of the above, when Thai smiles it means almost nothing or everything, and one should not misconstrued a Thai smile for niceness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tonto21 Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 "What are they really thinking"? Should be good once our experts wake up and tell us what its all about! Personally I would have though we would get more sensible answers to the question; "How long is a piece of string"? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whatproblem Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 How can we get your money Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnDodd Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 A Thai smile is meaningless and getting rarer. I have seen more genuine, and sincere smiles in Cardiff dock area. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crazy chef 1 Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 This post made me smile... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NanLaew Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 ... It is so typical of what I experienced from Thais whom have left to live in a new country; they suddenly become experts on advice. ... And then there's the TV resident experts as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jacky54 Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 Probably just thinking about som tam, not a lot more goes on in the thinking dept, money of course, that's about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rorri Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 "What are they really thinking"? Should be good once our experts wake up and tell us what its all about! Personally I would have though we would get more sensible answers to the question; "How long is a piece of string"? I'd prefer to read some "entertaining" thoughts than some foolish comments like yours, I guess even those who can't think need to see their name on screen. Personally, anyone could write a story like the OP, but then you could also write the opposite view and both would be right.... sometimes. After 6 years I have no doubt about my Thai wife's smile. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just1Voice Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 You want to see genuine Thai smiles? Start in Chiang Mai, get on a "big bike", 250cc or bigger, with a good helmet and kit. Then take a trip to Chiang Dao, then up to Fang, back down to Prae, then Phayao, head for Lampang, then Phitsanulok, down to Ayutthaya, then head for Loei, then Khon Kaen, over to Roi Et, then Udon Thani. Then go to Tak, up to Nakon Sawan, and finally back to Chiang Mai. Along the way stop in the small villages. Enjoy their food and hospitality. Stop at the road side stalls where they sell fruit and vegetables. Get off the bike, buy some fruit or veggies, sit down and enjoy them. I guarantee the people will give you REAL Thai smiles. They will want to talk to you. Nervously, of course, because they seldom know English, but they will try if you smile at them. They will ask if you can speak Thai. They will want to know where you are from. Not just which country, but where you live in Thailand. They will want to know if you have a Thai girlfriend or Thai wife. They will want to know why you came to Thailand, or why you live in Thailand. It's none of that fake, plastic shit like you see in Phuket, Pattaya, and Bangkok. It's real, and they are genuine. I know, because for the better part of 5 years, that's exactly what I did for 3-6 days at a time. Then I got felled by a stroke. But I'm working through that, and in another 3 months or so, I'm buying a new bike and I'm heading out again. The people I've met on these trips are the real Thai people, and they are beautiful. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shirtless Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 I thought the Thai smile was extinct , only time they seem happy is when buying something , the smile only lasts until they have your money. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chicowoodduck Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 I was told when I first came here that a Thai could smile when they are trying to kill you or when they are taking your money....just pick your poison...? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nidieunimaitre Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 If it was not from a sponsor, I would have labeled this a troll post. What is the OP trying to sell? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Somtamnication Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 If it was not from a sponsor, I would have labeled this a troll post. What is the OP trying to sell? Their online mag? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1FinickyOne Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 Thai smile at near everything and often - the motorcyclist who pulls in front of my car and almost gets hit - when I stop short, he smiles… that smile means Wheeew!! - but I see the smiles as having multiple meanings and they seem to be a reaction to near anything - it can be a response to hopefully avoid a potential confrontation, to lighten up a potential problem or sometimes what seems just a lack of knowing how to respond, when in doubt - smile. I have seen Westerners here who interpret every smile as a flirtation - then find it false if not so… I think if you have the awareness that is the first step to interpreting the Thai smile, but it does need to be interpreted. It can even mean, 'ooops! I screwed up and knocked your coffee into your lap!! - no, I am not laughing at your misfortune I just don't know what else to do'… And the funniest thing for my wife in the West was when I would accidentally hit my head - the more it hurt, the funnier it was for her… As to finances - yes, I have seen that reaction of Thai ladies or ladies anywhere wanting to be "helpful" to friends after their good fortune. Wanting to marry up in finances is not a Thai thing alone though they might be a bit more upfront about it. Does a parent in the Western World want their daughter to marry the doctor who will work hard and be an excellent provider or would they prefer the sweet poet who will guarantee a life of intellectual stimulation and poverty? This is an interesting and expansive subject and not limited to Thai alone… Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoiBiker Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 (edited) I've never understood why people complain about 'fake' smiles. In other countries, does a smile automatically indicate a commitment to a lifelong friendship or total honesty? Sometimes people just smile out of politeness, or as a bland greeting, or just because their boss told them to. Why do people expect Thailand to be any different? Edited November 29, 2015 by SoiBiker Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lostmebike Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 You want to see genuine Thai smiles? Start in Chiang Mai, get on a "big bike", 250cc or bigger, with a good helmet and kit. Then take a trip to Chiang Dao, then up to Fang, back down to Prae, then Phayao, head for Lampang, then Phitsanulok, down to Ayutthaya, then head for Loei, then Khon Kaen, over to Roi Et, then Udon Thani. Then go to Tak, up to Nakon Sawan, and finally back to Chiang Mai. Along the way stop in the small villages. Enjoy their food and hospitality. Stop at the road side stalls where they sell fruit and vegetables. Get off the bike, buy some fruit or veggies, sit down and enjoy them. I guarantee the people will give you REAL Thai smiles. They will want to talk to you. Nervously, of course, because they seldom know English, but they will try if you smile at them. They will ask if you can speak Thai. They will want to know where you are from. Not just which country, but where you live in Thailand. They will want to know if you have a Thai girlfriend or Thai wife. They will want to know why you came to Thailand, or why you live in Thailand. It's none of that fake, plastic shit like you see in Phuket, Pattaya, and Bangkok. It's real, and they are genuine. I know, because for the better part of 5 years, that's exactly what I did for 3-6 days at a time. Then I got felled by a stroke. But I'm working through that, and in another 3 months or so, I'm buying a new bike and I'm heading out again. The people I've met on these trips are the real Thai people, and they are beautiful. Complete agreement. I've toured many times around the north on a bike and like you, stopped at many off-the-beaten-track places. Nice people, nice food and a lot of warmth out there. REAL Thailand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Supaluke Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 For me, much more interesting to peruse. 13 pages of Thai Visa readers contributions to capturing the 'Thai Smile'. Thai Smile - click the link Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Minnehaha Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 I've never understood why people complain about 'fake' smiles. In other countries, does a smile automatically indicate a commitment to a lifelong friendship or total honesty? Sometimes people just smile out of politeness, or as a bland greeting, or just because their boss told them to. Why do people expect Thailand to be any different? Thais and other nationalities and cultures (Asians, South Asians, and others) all smile for different reasons that westerners do not. Of course everyone smiles when happy or when wanting to appear inviting. It works. It is nice. It is welcoming. It is not duplicitous. The smiles people are talking about are those you might see when a Thai sees a car accident or tells you about someone's death or some such thing. These are repugnant to a Westerners sentiment. But if you keep in mind that Thais (and many other cultures) smile when they are uncomfortable, or when they try not to cry, or when they are trying to hide another emotion.... then you may not need to be so judgmental about seeing a smile when you think it is inappropriate. One may wish to examine their own need to be "right" about someone elses behavior. Making them wrong, makes you right. This is a very effective way to deal with the world, particularly if one is unaware of their predilection for judgement ... even especially judgement of their own behavior. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikiea Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 "What are they really thinking"? Should be good once our experts wake up and tell us what its all about! Personally I would have though we would get more sensible answers to the question; "How long is a piece of string"? they are weighing the discomfort of a 95 k slab of fat flopping over them to 3 debt cards with a 175,000 baht total replenished every month . oh the pain . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sawadee1947 Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 Thai smile doesn't mean anything. It's just a mask not showing real feelings or emotions. You can hide best with a smile. It's a fassade only. And on the country side you won't see so many smiles because life is hard to stay. So don't feel pleased if a Thai girl smiles at you. It's just nothing but could mean everything. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MMF Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 (edited) I was actually referring to the comment that "Just1voice" wrote. Totally agree. Generally, in my view, the whole world is the same. Agree with comment above, one can smile at nervousness, because they're happy, because they're being polite etc. This behaviour goes on world wide. I find it that here the smiles are more genuine in areas that haven't been affected by thousands of farangs. We come here for various reasons, lets face it guys, you know what I'm taliking about. In these cases you may get a fake smile but, in my experience, even in these situations you may get what you deserve. The lady is fake? Not to your liking? Not gunuine? Walk away....But again, in my experience Ive learned to walk when the lady is not pleasand-genuine etc, at the same time, I've met some really nice girls whom they will remember me for the way I've treated them. I've now lived with my g'f for 4 1/2 years and, she's the most pleasant, generous, kind and honest person I've met in my life. I've been married to two English women and, although I don't regret any of it, I feel so much more fulfilled now, inspite of some of the difficulties we encounter here. Further more, I have to admit that it would help to speak Thai, I don't but, I'm learning by picking it up along the way. Hope this help to clarify some areas of this subject. Edited November 29, 2015 by MMF Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ACam Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 You want to see genuine Thai smiles? Start in Chiang Mai, get on a "big bike", 250cc or bigger, with a good helmet and kit. Then take a trip to Chiang Dao, then up to Fang, back down to Prae, then Phayao, head for Lampang, then Phitsanulok, down to Ayutthaya, then head for Loei, then Khon Kaen, over to Roi Et, then Udon Thani. Then go to Tak, up to Nakon Sawan, and finally back to Chiang Mai. Along the way stop in the small villages. Enjoy their food and hospitality. Stop at the road side stalls where they sell fruit and vegetables. Get off the bike, buy some fruit or veggies, sit down and enjoy them. I guarantee the people will give you REAL Thai smiles. They will want to talk to you. Nervously, of course, because they seldom know English, but they will try if you smile at them. They will ask if you can speak Thai. They will want to know where you are from. Not just which country, but where you live in Thailand. They will want to know if you have a Thai girlfriend or Thai wife. They will want to know why you came to Thailand, or why you live in Thailand. It's none of that fake, plastic shit like you see in Phuket, Pattaya, and Bangkok. It's real, and they are genuine. I know, because for the better part of 5 years, that's exactly what I did for 3-6 days at a time. Then I got felled by a stroke. But I'm working through that, and in another 3 months or so, I'm buying a new bike and I'm heading out again. The people I've met on these trips are the real Thai people, and they are beautiful. Hit the nail on the head,,so refreshing to see a positive post about LOS. I live in the south and have not done that trip but it sounds fantastic,,,one day,,, Real thailand is not Pattaya,Phuket,Samui,Hua hin,,etc etc.You will find at least 90% of the thai people who frequent these places are not "born there"most are just there for the work(legitimate&illegitimate). Too many judgments are made from these tourist epicenters which are not truly representative of genuine thai people as a whole. As far as I am concerned there is no cultures or places on earth that are perfect.Often you get back what you give out. Wouldn't anyone rather see a smile than a frown,i see many farang walking around around like the weight of the world is on their shoulders, so to me its a state of mind. My experience in travelling around is,if you give a smile i've always got one back,,even when no english is spoken at all,,,and its genuine,,not "would you like fries with that?" Here endith the lesson!!!!!! Get out there......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnhw Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 5 units in my small apartment building back home in that wonderful non-Thai world. Been resident there for 10 years, smiled and said hello to all my neighbors countless times, but if I don't say "hello" first, most pass me by in the very narrow hallway w/o as much as eye contact. At the neighborhood park, I do not smile and greet people anymore because of the returning grunt at best, the unfriendly stare, or occasionally an ignorant comment by the younger set for my interfering interruption with their hand-held electronic lover. Shortly before travelling here, a woman banged her shopping cart into my knee, and when I smiled and said "sorry" to ease any tension, she gave me a glare that would stun a pachyderm and angrily moved on. I'll take a Thai smile, sincere or not, any day. It's one of the main attractions for me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nowisee Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 (edited) Reply 21, 24 and 25 are very insightful and helpful. The comment about when traveling around and giving a smile is good. Most decent people will smile back. Not sure if I did it before, but I find myself smiling and sometimes laughing when I see or hear something that would normally invoke a different (perhaps inappropriate) facial response. Last time in my home country I noticed a lot of deep furrowed frowns and it just makes people look ugly and mean. Edited November 29, 2015 by Nowisee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UPDEHSOI Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 How can we get your money Or, in many many cases...HOW MUCH of it can I/we get. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gecko123 Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 (edited) Trying to decipher this poorly written and proofread article did not make me smile. It gave me a headache. Edited November 29, 2015 by Gecko123 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UPDEHSOI Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 A Thai smile is meaningless and getting rarer. I have seen more genuine, and sincere smiles in Cardiff dock area. or on an airline stew's face. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UPDEHSOI Posted November 29, 2015 Share Posted November 29, 2015 This post made me smile... GROAAAAAN!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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