Am I being a dick to my thai gf?

[fireplay]

Very hard to get ones head around this. A young most probably quite attractive young girl..jealous of an old geezer.

just one of the aspects of life in LOS where eveything normal is upside down

Fitness life and a 6 pack helps with the young ones eye.

Edited January 26, 2016 by fireplay

[wow64]

Hey to everyone again thanks for the sincere.hilarious. and

d!ckish replies...some are real gems. I just read 8 pages at once and will try to clarify some things as if it even matters...

1. We open cam every day. The issue hasn't been raised since the initial bomb drop. Her fb pic is still black...but its all kid thueng chan rak khun again...tears from missing me....

2. We met on thai friendly. We have lived together for 1 year. Her parents and family have no idea...but her mom i think is worried/suspicious she stays with me.

3. She wont come to the usa with me...not ready. I only met her mom and dad once. I made her get a passport...I want her to move with me to tokyo this june...and see the world with me...rent an ocean cottage in greece...apartment in madrid..few months here few months there....her mom won't let her meet me in Brazil in march for a maroon 5 concert (backstage my boy does sound for dashboard confessional. Opening act) so she says now as of today she is ok to go to America end of this year

4. I dont know what to say about the money thing. Yes i take care of her but to be honest I was thinking about starting a new thread about "the long game." My girl friend is not materialistic..at all..is not into fashion...and hates to spend money. I have offered her money since i left...she refuses. I even gave her a bank card copy (sans password ) so if she needs money she can dip in there and take it. She is all about saving money. She thinks a pair of shoes for 500 bht is pang mak...she likes to look at expensive things but she never wants to buy or me to buy. I paid the rent for the next four months gave her walk around cash and paid for graduation pics. She works her ass off for 300 bht a day at tesco lotus. She just got hired at a lab starting next month.

I dont want to be the "my gf is different!" Guy but seriously some of you are way off base. She wants to get a house and start a coffee shop...I'm not ready to invest in thailand until the gov improves...and then a condo..i am not a chiang rai country guy...

Anyways I don't know why i just shared all that...maybe to keep getting more feedback on it...sorry if its off topic... thanks again its lovely to see all you guys commenting here...whose posts i read all over this site daily.

Is this the "my girlfriend is different" thread?

[fireplay]

555 wow64 noooo man I wasn't planning on that ...jing jing....trust me I totally own that it could be the "long game" category...because I can't figure it out...she is not a go out girl...she doesnt drink doesnt meet her friends...what do you think? The big news today is she rearranged the room furniture....

[Guest]

Perfectly ok to stay with x. Put your tgf in her place. This is not farang world. Buy the T shirt with OBEY or I'M THE BOSS

555 ... Jack, even if you do have a "girlfriend' for more than a few hours at a time...a few evenings week ...

Trust me on this ...

She is either butt ugly ...

Or truly truly loves her king and want to collect as many pocket sized pictures of him that she can ... from YOU.

"OBEY or I'M THE BOSS" Truly laughing out loud... thanks.

Your ignorance of relationships in los you have just demonstrated very well. Everything here is an arrangement. Don't kid yourself. You take care of her andvisa versa. On farang side iit's providing financial support. BTW my live in tgf of 4 years is far from butt ugly. My guess is you don't live here or if you do and tell me your happily in love. I hope your money doesn't run out

I have lived here (full time) longer than you.

Read your own posting.

It says .. in so many words ... "I pay, she stays"

I believe that is called "Rent to own"

As to my very lovely Thai wife ... really none of your concern. Since I treat her with respect and patience, and value each day we have together ... I do not need to wear a ridiculous misogynistic T Shirt or be a bully.

I know you have a dim view of women as a whole, and seem to think your tgf is a paid employee .. OK haansum man .. up to you! But please do not paint the world with your myopic xenophobic racist misogynistic brush.

Happily, there is a secret world far from yours, where people actually have real relationships, that have been tested over time .. good times and bad .. ups and downs .. and still remain strong, positive and happy.

Now give the lass her cash if you want to see her A$$. It must be a rather empty life, when your "Girlfriend" has a meter like a Taxi.

[Rorri]

The op is a dick, no matter what he says, on here, there is no way, if the boot was on the other foot, he would allow his gf to go and stay with ex bf/s in the US, I actually think that this story is all made up, if not, it shows extreme lack of maturity, and understanding, his Thai gf, if in fact he has one, should let him go, while he's away, throw out all his belongings, and refuse to allow him back, why would she want to be put through this anguish, year after year.

[crazykopite]

Your 40 she is 24 and your both from different worlds yours being the wealthy US hers most probably a village in the North of Thailand that explains everything and it will never change !!!!

[bark]

@jimbo she asked me the same thing...the thing is if her ex is from a decade and a half ago and has been her family brother and has moved on through many girlfriends and was in a current 4 year relationship with his gf...no. not really. I trust her and i get the traveling lifestyle. I'm not a jealous type sorry....we my gf and I, have been together a year.

My ex has been more of my sister for the 18 YEARS i have known her.

You are they same as the other guy. Why are you having sex with your sister ?

[spike]

The first mistake you made was telling her you were staying with your ex-girlfriend.

A 41-year-old could have told you that was a bogus move....Live and learn.

[Stokakrishna]

most of Thai women are jealous and most of them very very jealous. so you have opened pandoras box... why did you tell her u will stay at your ex???

ahh , because you are honest. honesty is thailand is a very rare thing

most Thai women are jealous and why are they?? cause they do not trust any guy. why?? because they cheat themselves,

the ones that are not jealous are the ones that do not cheat.

[theguyfromanotherforum]

most of Thai women are jealous and most of them very very jealous. so you have opened pandoras box... why did you tell her u will stay at your ex???

ahh , because you are honest. honesty is thailand is a very rare thing

most Thai women are jealous and why are they?? cause they do not trust any guy. why?? because they cheat themselves,

the ones that are not jealous are the ones that do not cheat.

??

[Daniel Boon]

Thanks wooloomooloo I assume you are saying I should not even be considering this as an option and in so doing I am indeed being a dick. How insightful buddy.

you asked -for his - opinion and you got it, what's the problem (perhaps you should have said 'only those of the same opinion need respond')?

[Straight8]

your 1 white lie to avoid this drama versus their 100 + lies ??

You still feel bad for lying to a Thai bird, when they are masters at it.

[Mr Money Bags]

Yes, you are absolutely being a dick.

Your MUCH younger (and likely FAR more attractive) gf will get her revenge, be assured......

You're Welcome!!

[Daniel Boon]

Do what you want....it is a free country.....?

that's single man talk ...

[bruceamstutz]

Fair is fair.

As long as you allow her to stay at the homes of her ex-boyfriends. I am sure she will be looking them up.

Hey you one of them Crazy Mike??.......LOL/555

[mjkz]

lolLol this is typical shit white guys do when they come to Thailand... they couldn't develop a normal mature relationship or got rejected by "oh so bad feminist western women" and came to Thailand where "friendly" "exotic" "young" asian girls give them all the attention and treat them like kings(mostly their wallets).

This relationships with over 10 year gap is always same shit. The guy treats the 20 something year old as an undeveloped uneducated/ dumb savage who needs constant guidance like some child. Then they start to complain " she is super jealous and immature,needy and in some cases she's after your money too"...surprise surprise... Basically u wanted a spineless , docile, gullible, subservient, quiet, cute little sexy girl who'll just shut up and have sex with you. And you in turn can do whatever the u want. Sorry pal, they might smile to your face and be a bit softer on the outter then western chicks but most women are pretty much the same when you strip away some minor cultural shit. Human nature, and don't act like u'd be so chill with her staying with her hi-so ex, current hi-so brother in his 30 million THB condo while u in the states... please.. get real.

Such a turn off to watch them chase girls who weren't even born when they were graduating...

Edited January 26, 2016 by mjkz

[fireplay]

Sounds like you just read

http://whatsonsukhumvit.com/westerners-in-thailand-what-went-wrong/

Oh man you sound bent....

Edited January 26, 2016 by fireplay

[wow64]

555 wow64 noooo man I wasn't planning on that ...jing jing....trust me I totally own that it could be the "long game" category...because I can't figure it out...she is not a go out girl...she doesnt drink doesnt meet her friends...what do you think? The big news today is she rearranged the room furniture....

It's ok mine is different too... Only thing she did yesterday was get her brother to fix the air conditioner.. Which I thought was sensible as it was the coldet day in BKK for a few years...

Sent from my c64

[mjkz]

Sounds like you just read

http://whatsonsukhumvit.com/westerners-in-thailand-what-went-wrong/

Oh man you sound bent....

im sorry but am i that wrong? That does not happen? Ex pat males don't completely ignore white expat female population here? Ive seen bunch of white women in Thailand be single and say that western men just ignore their presence here. Come on, like the educated 45 year old would also have a ton in common with a 23-5 year old not so educated thai girl who speaks poor english and never left Thailand? To be honest we all know what the common thing would be.

[SoiBiker]

I know quite a few expat women. They do just fine.

[mjkz]

I know quite a few expat women. They do just fine.

Yeah I know a few as well, and they do, with asian guys.

Not the point, point is that while some may do just fine, i read all bunch of crap coming from western men how white women are so bad.

Anyway. back to the point of this question. The guy is being a dick to his gf. thats it.

[SoiBiker]

I know quite a few expat women. They do just fine.

Yeah I know a few as well, and they do, with asian guys.

Not the point, point is that while some may do just fine, i read all bunch of crap coming from western men how white women are so bad.

Anyway. back to the point of this question. The guy is being a dick to his gf. thats it.

Those western men are just a subset of the expat world, albeit quite a vocal one around these parts.

But yeah, he is.

[kennypowers]

She is 23 years old. What did you expect? She doesn't have the relationship or world experience to wrap her head around this. A 23 year old American girl would most likely act exactly the same. Find someone closer to your own age and you'll have less of these maturity issues that will forever cause you a headache.

[Minniefarang]

This guy is a dumb shit. Asking opinions of others while you're a grown man? Your Gf is 20 and Thai, do you think she's going to stay with you for while? She'll stay with you until she finds the next best thing. I know I would if I were her. You should know better than to stay with an ex even if she is more like your sister. Your Gf is only going to be picturing you <deleted> her even if it was umpteen years ago.

Sent from my iris708 using Tapatalk

[fireplay]

Interesting points of view and valid...on a tangential note....I don't ever meet girls my age in thailand who are into the same sort of lifestyle...most want to settle in buy a house and build a family. I am looking for a girl who wants to travel the world and live in different countries....I don't want kids...maybe one or something when i find the right girl...And my party outgoing social days are behind me. I work 10 to 15 hours a day mostly 7 days a week. I exercise. I dont drink i dont go out...hard to meet girls with this life...i did the online thing...have had 3 thai girl friends in 6 years...left the first one after 9 months...the second one left me after almost 2 years and now I have been with my current a year. I am a committed honest guy...

But i agree...i have much better conversations intellectually and with women who are older and have greater worldly awareness.

I have no problems with western girls...in fact its refreshing to be back in the west with people I can communicate in abstractions with and speak with political freedoms about topics most thai girls are not interested in talking about...at least the ones I have chatted to.

[fireplay]

This guy is a dumb shit. Asking opinions of others while you're a grown man? Your Gf is 20 and Thai, do you think she's going to stay with you for while? She'll stay with you until she finds the next best thing. I know I would if I were her. You should know better than to stay with an ex even if she is more like your sister. Your Gf is only going to be picturing you <deleted> her even if it was umpteen years ago.

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Hey i see tons of people asking opinions all the time on here of all ages! &lt;deleted&gt; man it is interesting to get candid annoynomous feedback from strangers with no vested interest.

[Minniefarang]

This guy is a dumb shit. Asking opinions of others while you're a grown man? Your Gf is 20 and Thai, do you think she's going to stay with you for while? She'll stay with you until she finds the next best thing. I know I would if I were her. You should know better than to stay with an ex even if she is more like your sister. Your Gf is only going to be picturing you <deleted> her even if it was umpteen years ago.

Sent from my iris708 using Tapatalk

Hey i see tons of people asking opinions all the time on here of all ages! <deleted> man it is interesting to get candid annoynomous feedback from strangers with no vested interest.

When you were her age, did you settle? No. You and like many other westerners, have gone through people like weeds. It's a rarity to find someone of that age to stay in a long term relationship. I don't need to tell you that because you already know. Anyway coming from a woman's (Thai/Western) perspective, you should not be staying at an ex's home. If you do that, you will also be making her look foolish and you will also cause her to lose face in front of another Thai. Not a very smart move wouldn't you say?

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[fireplay]

Making her look foolish to who exactly...thats another thing...I am almost certain she doesnt or wouldn't talk about the intimate details or personal stuff about our life to people. Remember...she is lying to her friends and family about me. They think I live in Bangkok and have met her in person 3 times. Once to meet the parents. God I can't believe how naive people seem to be around here. We live together...share a home together.

Edited January 28, 2016 by fireplay

[fireplay]

I was in one committed long term monogamous relationship or another throughout my entire 20's...4 girls to be exact...and thats probably why I don't lose my head or life over broken relationships anymore. It happens. People change. Feelings change.

Thanks for the comments.

[Ghostnigel]

Staying there is one thing, but to tell your Thai gf is another....why put her through that worry?