Ten of Thailand’s most deadly

[Inspire]

Ten of Thailand’s most deadly

Gerry Carter

 

 

Ever wondered why life expectancy in Thailand makes it almost necessary to come back for another existence? Read on and maybe give yourself just a small shot at surviving in the Kingdom to three score years and ten – if you’re lucky!

 

Here is my list of ten of the most deadly things to do in Thailand. The order is not important and will depend on the reader’s own lifestyle. And the list is really only scratching the surface; like what not to do if you get a nasty rash after a visit to Pattaya.

 

But ignore the warning signs at your peril – your very life may be at stake!

 

Going through green lights.

 

Standard logic would have it that going through red lights is not only illegal but perilous. In Thailand it is much safer than going through green. When you see that green light – especially if you are a motor-biker but also if crazy enough to be a pedestrian – this is the time to beware. Look left, right, straight ahead, up, down, even under the bike – danger lurks everywhere. Wait approximately ten seconds, longer at some intersections as the traffic continues to power through the red lights. Only when it is completely stopped – and has been for several seconds – may you proceed with the usual great caution.

 

Penalty for going through green lights: death within about three weeks assuming one journey or walk per day.

 

Saying “What a cute dog that is” and petting the said mutt kindly.

 

Though the prevalence of rabies deaths in Thailand is not as big as you might expect – there were eight last year and will be a few more this year – it is still absolutely vital to keep all notions of Western attitudes towards canines just there…in the West. Even mildly mannered dogs can suddenly foam at the mouth and attack when riled. In this they can mirror certain aspects of the wider human population especially when tanked up. And don’t think you can save yourself from attack by kicking out. That will be animal abuse and presuming you are caught on CCTV result in a long spell in a Thai jail. Animal abuse is much more serious than the human kind these days. While a spell in a Thai jail reduces the risk of heart disease other perils await. If in doubt ask Thaivisa forum members what can happen if you drop the soap in the shower in a Thai jail….they seem to have all been there, done
that.

 

Penalty for petting dogs: death by around thirty years of age, if you get the necessary jabs.

 

Saying “OK” to your Thai spouse’s comment that it is alright for you to have other relationships

 

Though probably a worldwide phenomenon, when the Thai missus or husband smiles benignly and says let’s enjoy a free and open relationship it is time to take clear and decisive action to stave off disaster. The offer is usually made when the defenses are low – possibly after a mutually good shagging or when you have enjoyed a satisfying plate of Som Tam Kai Yang. Rather than make the error of being beguiled into the slightest recognition that this is what you want you must attack on all fronts. “How on earth could you say such a thing?” “My darling whatever can be wrong?” Don’t even hesitate. That can be fatal too. When a smile has crossed their lips you can relax and go back to ignoring them – they will be happy….until the next time.

 

Full story: http://www.inspirepattaya.com/lifestyle/ten-thailands-deadly/

 

 

-- © Copyright Inspire Pattaya 2016-12-11

 

[FritsSikkink]

waste of time to read

[champers]

I was losing the will to live.

[thaisabai]

agree with FritsSikkink

total waste of time to read this article.

what are you doing in Thailand if you don't like it?

 

thaisabai

[marko kok prong]

who is this guy,this gerry Carter.

[Rob13]

15 minutes ago, marko kok prong said:

who is this guy,this gerry Carter.

 

some retard who's wife is taking him for all he's worth and doesn't have enough sense leave soi dogs alone.

[ksamuiguy]

Get a life, obviously you don't have one now!

[TPI]

Obviously the preceding OP's didn't read until the end, it all makes perfect sense, engage in life in Thailand at your peril!

 

More to the point, get into the life but pay attention and look for the pitfalls........an enjoyable read!

[1FinickyOne]

The OP says... 

 

"Standard logic would have it that going through red lights is not only illegal but perilous. In Thailand it is much safer than going through green."

 

Do you want to reconsider that? Running red lights is safer than going through green? I do understand that the roads are really dangerous here and death tolls amongst the highest in the world, but lets not make it worse than it already is... 

[doggie1955]

I would have to put Thai women on that list...

[radiochaser]

Well.  I see the humor in the article. 

:-P

 

[Rc2702]

Utterly crap article. poorly formatted too. if you do a top 10 of anything at least bullet point it and bold it out a bit. 

[dbrenn]

Rambling nonsense