Economic/class Differences

[davidjtayler]

"this is an honest question"

No, it is not. However, you trollish post reminds me of a Q+A in a newspaper's doctor's column:

Q: If a genius marries a moron, what are the odds that the child will be a moron?

A: Better than 50/50 because anyone who marries a moron can't be too smart.

I don't think this is a trollish question at all and having read some of girlx's posts on this and other forums know that it is a very honest post ... I don't have an answer my self though to girlx's conundrum.

[sbk]

"troll" is popularly bandied about, especially when a more serious topic comes up.

Since I don't believe this topic was started in order to cause disruption but rather an honest question, not sure what the problem is here.

Back to the topic, shall we?

[girlx]

hmm not a troll silly... does it surprise you that a woman might think about this?

[Fun2Fun]

hmm not a troll silly... does it surprise you that a woman might think about this?

Not at all, to break it down to local conditions

If you are a western woman considering a relationship with a Thai - its a very valid point of discussion.

If you are a Thai woman considering a relationship with a westerner - its just as valid a point.

[britmaveric]

Love is blind - all the rest are details that can be worked out, so don't think it has much bearing.

[sbk]

Love is blind - all the rest are details that can be worked out, so don't think it has much bearing.

That is because you are a true romantic Brit

[dvk1951]

Boo, that is exactly what I wanted to say, of course mine would have been sans the clarity and PCness of yours

I think that the individual has to decide what is important to them in a partner. If economic stability/status/earning ability (what ever you want to call it) is an important thing to you then you have to actively avoid the type of people who do not fit the profile & "seek" out the type of mate who does.

Many men have married ex bar girls & to them the social/economic status of their partner is unimportant so isn't a factor to consider, other men would never consider marrying a girl from that profession & look for a girl from a certain background/profession that suits their ideal.

I don't think there are any hard & fast rules & when you meet someone who doesn't meet your criteria but who you have a conenction with, then most of the time, the rules go out of the window

[Boo]

I try ha ha

[dgoz]

Well im marrying up. (thats right boys)

It definately doesnt make any difference, its just if you can click together and trust each other then that should out weight everything.

If you're marrying up as you say you are you'd best do something about that spelling and grammar before she finds out how, umm, cerebrally challenged you are. (yes, that's the phrase I was looking for)

[dvk1951]

I try ha ha

and succeed (most times)

[davidjtayler]

Love is blind - all the rest are details that can be worked out, so don't think it has much bearing.

That is because you are a true romantic Brit

No its because he IS blind ...

[Don Quixote]

Love is blind - all the rest are details that can be worked out, so don't think it has much bearing.

That is because you are a true romantic Brit

No its because he IS blind ...

Or just naive.

[geevlus]

There are no economic/social differences between my partner and I. I was born into a British working class family, just the way it worked out - Father rejected places offered at Oxford, Cambridge after obtaining some of the finest academic grades the UK has seen. Not much interested in a place offered at Sandhurst either. Didn't have the the ambition to follow through to become the Offical Receiver (High end civil servant job) for my part of the world. Stint as a Systems Analyist didn't seem to satisfy him much either. In the end he found happiness as job as a carpet fitter marrying my mum (A simple Scottish country girl), moving into a local authority house on the edge of some Woodland where he pursued the realm of the mind/body/spirit and built life - long relationships with the local bluecollar workers. This is what I was born into.

Now I live in the same area - right near my family (who ALL live in the same area). They're all in low status low paid jobs. My father always encouraged debate - Sometimes we throw a Few broadsheets on the kitchen table and have discussions about current/world events and politics etc. All my interests involve the surrounding countryside/nature etc which suits my Thai girl down to the ground as she is an Issan girl. My best friend is an uneducated jobbing taxi driver with about as much class as a Skoda car. He comes around for Thai food quite a lot.

I was blessed with Height, good looks and a well above average potential for Sport/physical activity. In fact I have excelled in most sports and am currently enjoying some almost super human swimming/cycling/running feats and being in the best physical condition there is. I don't drink or smoke and spend all my spare time educating myself through extensive reading and experience. All the while my Girl and I are in a low status low paid jobs without a sophisticated person in sight - All my friends and family are "low so" as they get. Have to work with "Sophisticated/Educated" people all day - this is the only chasm I have to cross

[Donz]

Well im marrying up. (thats right boys)

It definately doesnt make any difference, its just if you can click together and trust each other then that should out weight everything.

If you're marrying up as you say you are you'd best do something about that spelling and grammar before she finds out how, umm, cerebrally challenged you are. (yes, that's the phrase I was looking for)

Not when you look like the Donz

[ourmanflint]

As I said before, most men have difficulty with being "lower" than the woman and it would take a strong man to not have issues with it.

Whilst I agree with you whole heartedly SBK, it is only one side of the coin. I have been in a few relationships where I was by far and away at the lower socio-economic end compared to my partner. And I am very "strong" so didn't give a hoot, the only problems arose because I couldn't keep up with her lifestyle and more often than not, that led to arguments. I think the big difference is maybe one of attitude, men most often do not think twice about paying for their spouse if they wanted to go somewhere or do something, but ... for women I think it's a different story. They would expect you to pay for yourself, and when you can't then that leads to problems.

Men as I have said many times are very easy to please and have no qualms over such things as differences in economic background, as long as she is pretty... who cares??

But it takes a very strong woman to understand that just because the man she is with cannot always pay his way, that he is still the right man to be with.

[girlx]

yes i have to agree, i have met many men in my life who were more than happy to sit back and let the woman support them. when a man like that man was with me, it was most definitely more a problem for me than it was for him.

Edited December 13, 2006 by girlx

[Jookster]

There are no economic/social differences between my partner and I. I was born into a British working class family, just the way it worked out - Father rejected places offered at Oxford, Cambridge after obtaining some of the finest academic grades the UK has seen. Not much interested in a place offered at Sandhurst either. Didn't have the the ambition to follow through to become the Offical Receiver (High end civil servant job) for my part of the world. Stint as a Systems Analyist didn't seem to satisfy him much either. In the end he found happiness as job as a carpet fitter marrying my mum (A simple Scottish country girl), moving into a local authority house on the edge of some Woodland where he pursued the realm of the mind/body/spirit and built life - long relationships with the local bluecollar workers. This is what I was born into.

Now I live in the same area - right near my family (who ALL live in the same area). They're all in low status low paid jobs. My father always encouraged debate - Sometimes we throw a Few broadsheets on the kitchen table and have discussions about current/world events and politics etc. All my interests involve the surrounding countryside/nature etc which suits my Thai girl down to the ground as she is an Issan girl. My best friend is an uneducated jobbing taxi driver with about as much class as a Skoda car. He comes around for Thai food quite a lot.

I was blessed with Height, good looks and a well above average potential for Sport/physical activity. In fact I have excelled in most sports and am currently enjoying some almost super human swimming/cycling/running feats and being in the best physical condition there is. I don't drink or smoke and spend all my spare time educating myself through extensive reading and experience. All the while my Girl and I are in a low status low paid jobs without a sophisticated person in sight - All my friends and family are "low so" as they get. Have to work with "Sophisticated/Educated" people all day - this is the only chasm I have to cross

Just because your born to a 'working class' British family does not make you the same socio-economic class as an Isaan girl. Working class British is not the same as working class Thai/Isaan. Furthermore you don't mention her family, is she from a high or low socio-economic one. I presume the latter since you seem to be relating low socio-economic British to low socio-ecomic Isaan. I stress the socio too other than a low s/e British person being far richer in relative and absolute terms than a Thai one, what about the socio elelement? There must be cultural differences too.

In no way do I see anything wrong in your relationship just the statement that you are in the same socio-econmic class, which may be true now. But surely the question partains to the background of a person not just their current situation.

Also why the need to stress your height, looks, sporting 'excellence!' etc?

Edited December 13, 2006 by Jookster

[Heng]

Communication is important, and often related to economic issues: some people simply don't have the benefit of a basic education nor the life experience outside of their own local community because of economic limitations. Many, not all of course, of my foreign friends (both Eastern Asians and westerners) simply can't discuss things with their local husbands or wives. Fortunately for some it's just common issues related to cross cultural communication. For others though, there are examples all the way down the scale towards the 'you like spicy? + 5 other conversation topics' as their entire portfolio of communication couples. Sometimes it makes for good party material, but on the downside it can lead to a lot of misunderstanding and serious argmuments over virtually nothing.

A lot of folks out there can barely talk to each other, much less truly communicate.

[Neeranam]

A lot of folks out there can barely talk to each other, much less truly communicate.

Very true.

just wondering, if you hook up with someone of lower economic status/class than you does the imbalance always prevent a real relationship from developing? ie. will that difference in experience/opportunities always be an issue between the opposite sides? or will relationships like that always fall into a prostitute/patron thing... this is an honest question. of course most people would see it from the outside as being the latter, but are there really successful love relationships between people who have nothing (like a lot of thailand) and people who have plenty, where the one with plenty doesn't resent the one without and vice versa?

I'd say no - I know an ex-beggar from the UK who is very happily married to a woman, who is the daughter of a Thai senator. Their difference in background seems to be no problem.

They say opposites attract. I love intelligent women!

[Neeranam]

edit - double post

Edited December 13, 2006 by Neeranam

[bluedragon]

just wondering, if you hook up with someone of lower economic status/class than you does the imbalance always prevent a real relationship from developing? ie. will that difference in experience/opportunities always be an issue between the opposite sides? or will relationships like that always fall into a prostitute/patron thing... this is an honest question. of course most people would see it from the outside as being the latter, but are there really successful love relationships between people who have nothing (like a lot of thailand) and people who have plenty, where the one with plenty doesn't resent the one without and vice versa?

girlx,

just wondering, if you hook up with someone of lower economic status/class than you does the imbalance always prevent a real relationship from developing? NO.

Will that difference in experience/opportunities always be an issue between the opposite sides? NO, but there will always be issues in any situation.

or will relationships like that always fall into a prostitute/patron thing...,NO, except some peole on this forum will always make that a thing!! .

Are there really successful love relationships between people who have nothing (like a lot of thailand) and people who have plenty, where the one with plenty doesn't resent the one without and vice versa? YES, it's there everyday, you just have to open your eyes.

Regards, BD