The Penis

[Little Black Duck]

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

1. I do physical labor.

2. I work at great depths.

3. I plunge head first into everything I do.

4. I do not get weekends or public holidays off.

5. I work in a damp environment.

6. I work in a dark area that has poor ventilation.

7. I work in high temperatures.

8. My work exposes me to diseases.

_______________________________

Dear Penis,

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised,

the management denies your request for the following reasons:

1. You do not work 8 hours straight.

2. You work in short spurts and fall asleep after each brief work period.

3. You do not always follow the orders of the management team.

4. You do not stay in your designated area, and are often seen visiting other locations.

5. You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.

6. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.

7. You dont always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.

8. You will retire long before you are 65.

9. You are unable to work double shifts.

10. You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task.

11. And if that were not all, you have constantly been seen entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.

sincerely, The Management

[Grover]

I didnt hear that one before.

quite good LBD. you got balls to post a topic with that title

Edited December 17, 2006 by Grover

[suegha]

Very clever!

[In the Rai!]

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

1. I do physical labor.

2. I work at great depths.

3. I plunge head first into everything I do.

4. I do not get weekends or public holidays off.

5. I work in a damp environment.

6. I work in a dark area that has poor ventilation.

7. I work in high temperatures.

8. My work exposes me to diseases.

_______________________________

Dear Penis,

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised,

the management denies your request for the following reasons:

1. You do not work 8 hours straight.

2. You work in short spurts and fall asleep after each brief work period.

3. You do not always follow the orders of the management team.

4. You do not stay in your designated area, and are often seen visiting other locations.

5. You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.

6. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.

7. You dont always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.

8. You will retire long before you are 65.

9. You are unable to work double shifts.

10. You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task.

11. And if that were not all, you have constantly been seen entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.

sincerely, The Management

[Grover]

12. Upon arriving to work, instead of going through the main entrance like everyone else, you often shamlessly enter by forcing your way through the rear exit door, which is clearly marked with a brown dot. This sometimes causing damage to property, and risking injury to others

This constant violation (of the rules) often results in a loud alarm and emergency evactuation and a closure for at least 24 hours.

Edited December 18, 2006 by Grover