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[rooster59]

The week that was in Thailand news: Thai murder most fowl

 

 

Rooster likes a good murder.

Since becoming a reporter at an early age and handling my first case I have always been fascinated by what drives people to commit this most terrible of crime. And I am equally obsessed by the investigations that take place to attempt to bring the perpetrators to justice.

While many friends are out enjoying the nightlife of Bangkok, Rooster is much more likely to be tucked up in bed with a packet of Maltesers and a mug of Earl Grey enjoying the latest YouTube reruns of Forensic Files.

When I first came to Thailand, though a little shocked in my naivety about the amount of murder that is committed here, I fit right in at once….

All those gory magazines with their sensational stories became my way of learning the written Thai language. Perhaps even more these days Rooster likes to follow the latest crimes befalling the nation, all played out on Thaivisa.

Though very interesting if I have one criticism they are often solved too quickly or not at all. Whether the former if due to the efficiency of the police or the idiocy of the perps I shall say, perhaps kindly, that it is true in equal measure.

Rarely, however, do we get long running police investigations. Crimes that don’t end in speedy reenactments are often lost in the Thai ether, remembered only by those who are closely affected. Some of course are shuffled under the carpet for obvious reasons.

This week we saw a fast moving case that encapsulated many salacious details and involved both a competent police investigation and one that may please students of crime for a while yet. The murder of Nong Em the karaoke girl cut in two is certainly captivating the Thai public.

Unusually for a murder it even made the front page headlines of a national newspaper in English and many on Thaivisa are also following the latest lurid revelations.

With sex and intrigue, red herrings and revelations, gruesome and vicious behavior the case is like something from the annals of the worst crimes of Victorian England. And all with a Thai twist – like the first reenactment this week with the man in a crash helmet at the scene of the burial of the young victim and of course the involvement of the tomboys and a decidedly pretty but evidently cruel woman on the run with friends in Burma.

The case is now well into its second week which contrasts with a double homicide in Mukdahan that was all over within a day. There a stepfather – incongruously jealous about his wife receiving some term fees from her ex – decided to dispatch her and his mother-in-law…all in front of his 9 year old stepdaughter.

He was caught later in the day having a last meal before giving himself up.

I wish someone from my wife’s past would turn up to pay my kids’ fees! I can easily separate any jealousy from the need for cash.

Call it a life skill.

Two who have been convicted of taking a man’s life in Lat Prao were the recidivists responsible for murder while stealing an iPhone. The forum was rife with bloodthirsty yells of “yippee”. Maybe the gung-ho should wait to see if pardons are announced in a few years.

Not that the miscreants will likely ever see the light of day without intervening bars, but they have about as much chance of being executed as the victim has of coming back to life. As a spokesman announced the next day Thailand has not executed anyone since 2009.  Amnesty International considers a country not to actually have the ultimate sanction if it hasn’t used it for a decade…..

Without wishing to remotely downplay the severity of the case or the callousness of the men who would kill for a few thousand baht Rooster is glad that the Thais have put their machine gun away.

Why? Well that interest in murder also extends to all the wrongful executions and if only for the memory of Timothy Evans and Craig Bentley – two victims of the UK state from my hometown – I shall never be in favor of capital punishment.

No need to face the judge this week was the woman who got out a sword and deprived her man of his manhood. Two good things happened – some surgeons seem to have been able to reattach the said organ while the wife gargled some pesticide and killed herself.

I am afraid I find the double standards some display when a man gets wounded in this way distasteful in the extreme.

So to paraphrase a Thai saying that every Thai I have ever met would know, I hope they feed the dead wife to the ducks.

Airports are never far from the news and this week was no exception with the authorities at Swampy announcing that some foreigners will soon be able to use the Thai electronic immigration gates to allegedly save everyone time.

Hopefully they will have a bit more savvy than the Thais I have seen trying to work out what to do – there is always a Thai official on hand by the machines. It strikes me that this is employment overkill before anyone has even got to the Thai roads outside the terminal.

Rooster has permanent residence but I would still use the regular Thai exit gates if I hadn’t. I can’t believe anyone would seriously turn you back – especially if you have some rejoinder in Thai at the ready like such and such a movie star is waiting for you at the carousel.

It is rather akin to the many years Rooster drove on the Thai roads without a license – whenever I was stopped and asked for my “bai khap khii” I would show a wallet picture of the Thai wife and kids. The cops invariably laughed and sent me on my way.

There are two basic rules to successful living in Thailand. The first is smiling and the second is having a verbal rejoinder to make people laugh. No matter how silly it may be to a Western sensibility the trick is to remember the crasser the better.

Meanwhile, my Schadenfreudometer hit maximum with the story of all those poor Brits unable to get to Thailand because BA forgot to plug in the computer in Calcutta or wherever it is their workers earn minimum wage.

In all my years of flying to and from Albion I have never heard so many excuses as those you get for the poor service on the British carrier. I was obliged to use BA for yonks because my school insisted on it due to some corporate deal on end of contract flights.

It was like being given detention at the end of the school year for being a naughty teacher.

Apparently some hotels around Heathrow were charging 1,000 quid a night for the stranded. What with the 10,000 people who claimed free tickets for the Manchester benefit concert who never even went in the first place, I think it is time that those who go on Thaivisa to claim that fleecing and corruption are exclusively Thai traits should pipe down.

The same also goes for the poster who accused Rooster of being an ISIS sympathizer for suggesting that the suicide bomber was not cowardly. Do people not understand that underestimating your enemy is likely to make them stronger?

Moving forwards from cowards to awards here are this week’s Rooster top trumps…

After the week of “Covfefe” I would like to present the “Donald Trump Award for Imaginative Use of the English Language” to the translator who wrote the headline about the accident motorcycle that was rent in two being “spliced”.

It sounds so right but somehow I doubt the rider will be able to put it back together again – though with the Thai penchant for imaginative repairs, you never know!

Best “Picture Exhibiting News Interest Story” (P.E.N.I.S. award) goes to the the whimsical wag from Coconuts who chose a humble cucumber being sliced for the penile detachment article.

It was like something out of a “Viz’ comic: “Here is a sliced cucumber yesterday”.

Though with the Honorable Member for Thailand being reattached maybe slice should have been replaced with splice, just for the sake of the happy ending.

“Best Forum Comment” of the week went to “colinneil” who is invariably one of the first to comment on any news story on Thaivisa. Though I sometimes feel that he has ground his axe to nubbins he got a zillion likes for his comment on yet another story about the rebranding of Pattaya from “sex city” to tourism hub.

The story claimed that the aforementioned “Whore of the Eastern Seaboard” was now a boomtown to which the poster said: “Possible misprint…….surely they meant Pattaya boom boom town”.

The story went on to talk about Pattaya being declared a MICE town in the future, an apparent acronym for making it a hub of meetings and conventions not an infestation of rodents.

All male delegates would undoubtedly be delighted to go to a curtain ring convention in Pattaya but the final word must go to the deputy mayor who is clearly taking a leaf out of tourism minister Khun Kobkarn’s book in trying to replace the sex trade with something more wholesome.

The name of the deputy mayor?

Khun Ban-tit no less.

Rooster

 

 

 

-- © Copyright Thai Visa News 2017-06-04

[Catkiwi]

Rooster, you are no doubt old enough to remember Basil Brush whom had another use for "boom boom"!

[GarryP]

An entertaining read.