Funniest Moment In Thailand

[Jet Gorgon]

On another trip to Lopburi I saw a monkey jump on a woman's head, at the bus stop. She was in a frenzy, but the monkey was pretty relaxed and just sat there for 15 seconds or so...

I hate you, jasreeve17. A good swallow of wine spewed and wasted all over my laptop screen after reading that.

[donna]

when i first came here i was trekking in the north. my guide asked me if i liked fruit shakes.

'oh yes, i really like a good banana shake' i replied.

'do you know how to ask for it in thai?'

'no, but i would love you to teach me' i said.

so we went about this big lesson where i was going to ask for a banana shake when i was next wanting one.

a couple of days after the trek i was in chiang mai and went in to this little restaurant armed with my paperwork for my trip and sat down and was approached by the waiter. i was so keen to practice my new phrase, i had even written it down.

and order it i did. so proud.

the waiter cracked up and walked into the kitchen. i could hear something about 'farang' and all this laughter.

i ended up with my banana shake, but when i returned to my hotel i was telling the staff what had happened. they asked me to repeat the order in thai again, so i did.

"kor kuay pun ka".

i was asking for a penis shake.

never did go back to that shop again!

[Jet Gorgon]

when i first came here i was trekking in the north. my guide asked me if i liked fruit shakes.

'oh yes, i really like a good banana shake' i replied.

'do you know how to ask for it in thai?'

'no, but i would love you to teach me' i said.

so we went about this big lesson where i was going to ask for a banana shake when i was next wanting one.

a couple of days after the trek i was in chiang mai and went in to this little restaurant armed with my paperwork for my trip and sat down and was approached by the waiter. i was so keen to practice my new phrase, i had even written it down.

and order it i did. so proud.

the waiter cracked up and walked into the kitchen. i could hear something about 'farang' and all this laughter.

i ended up with my banana shake, but when i returned to my hotel i was telling the staff what had happened. they asked me to repeat the order in thai again, so i did.

"kor kuay pun ka".

i was asking for a penis shake.

never did go back to that shop again!

learn new language velly good. Best laughs.

[ricklev]

I had a similar problem. I was trying to ask the receptionist at the hotel if she ever studied the English course books I lent her. I said "hen kuay mai"which I thought meant "did you ever look" but which I was later told sounded just like "do you want to see my penis". The girl ran away and everybody thought it was pretty funny.

[mark lamai]

went to the Pak Khlong market (bangkok) to buy some guava for a thai friend.

i guess they don't get many foreigners in there.

the guy who sold them to me cracked up and shouted to all

"farang buy farang" (in thai of course)

.......................................................

in retrospect...

young thai woman driving up the right hand lane turns left into a driveway knocking me (in left lane) off my motorcycle. so sorry and drives me to the hospital, bit of blood and skin missing nothing serious.

steers car with that kids push n pull motion.

on the phone to sister, entering the hospital grounds, steering one handed almost runs over a patient walking by.

......................................................

[Tingnongnoi]

a funny afterwards but scary at the time moment. I jumped in a cab to go into Bangkok and the driver had had some sort of operation on his throat, where he was breating through a tube out of his throat. All was well until he got a call on his mobile, as he then needed to steer with his elbow as one hand was holding the phone and a finger of the other hand was covering the airpipe in his throat so he could speak.

Another time I got in a cab and the driver had a pet squirrel that decided to spend half the journey sat on my shoulder

[jEFFREYk44]

Another time at the same time as the "Mae Moi" incident, we (my then wife and I) were eating with our neighbors, two bargirls, one pretty, one stunning, and they had two guys visiting them that day, not leftovers from the night before.

One guy says to the Stunner, "How did you ever get so beautiful?"..........She tells him, "I drink Nam Pla", he asks if he could try and she complies and I have never seen a face scruche up or implode like that after he took a full shot glass!

[Jet Gorgon]

Got my first car in Thailand and decide to go out for a burger. Too late, the restaurant is closed so I pull a u-ey to go home. No traffic. I'm beetling along and a car is coming toward me in my lane. "Dufus!" I think to myself. He does not change lanes and I decide not to play chicken and pull off the road. So does the other guy. Oh, squash, it's the police. One cop gets out and comes to my car. My bowels indicate evacuation mode.

"Sawasdee khrup."

"Hello. Sir."

"Maybe better you drive other side road, Madame." He returned to his car.

Ya, I was driving on the right. Well, there was no other traffic and I, uh...never did that again.

[glenbat]

Waking up at 3pm in my room on Soi Dianna Inn in Patts in a drunken state and notice a black thing lurking in the shadows under the sideboard with TV on it.. both mates had moved rooms to the next floor the previous day because of cockroaches (fookin things!!!), so i lept onto the bed and screamed as a shiver raced up my back. Miss skinny arsed thai lass just layed there with her bum showing, and in rushed the 2 cleaners, I explained best I could theres a cockroach under the desk get rid of it!!!!!!

One leant down and grabbed the cockroach and threw it at me and screamed!! Turns out the 'cockroach' was actually a black condom (I'd ran out ok?) I'd carelessly discarded several hours later before falling asleep with skinny arse.

Anyways, said condom flew through the air and landed on my shoulder, I screamed again and tossed it back (the condom that is) until it ended up in the bin