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Everything posted by scottiejohn
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Worst Joke Ever 2025
scottiejohn replied to warfie's topic in Jokes - Puzzles and Riddles - Make My Day!
Did you hear about the woman who had problems giving birth at sea? She had to have an emergency sea-section. But it ended well as she had a bouncing baby buoy. -
Scottish man becomes latest victim of Thailand’s perilous roads
scottiejohn replied to snoop1130's topic in Krabi News
I suggest you educate yourself before making stupid incomprehensible posts; What PS Means and How to Use It Correctly in Your Email | Grammarly -
Worst Joke Ever 2025
scottiejohn replied to warfie's topic in Jokes - Puzzles and Riddles - Make My Day!
Nice to see the Bishop getting a knight off! PS; I wonder who paid the check and did they have Queen Prawns? -
Worst Joke Ever 2025
scottiejohn replied to warfie's topic in Jokes - Puzzles and Riddles - Make My Day!
A dog making a spectacle of itself! -
Worst Joke Ever 2025
scottiejohn replied to warfie's topic in Jokes - Puzzles and Riddles - Make My Day!
True & not a joke! Not anymore importunely as it was destroyed by fire and then demolished recently! -
I agree. I use the fixed deposit account with BKK and all the IO want is the letter and the updated passbook. I make no transaction to update my book. The only transactions that ever shows in the book is the interest ones! In the past the CM IO used to ask for evidence of daily living expenses so I always have my regular passbook with me but no specific update just for the IO! The have not asked for that for a few years now.
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Scottish man becomes latest victim of Thailand’s perilous roads
scottiejohn replied to snoop1130's topic in Krabi News
It makes no difference what country you die in, you are still dead. It might be a PIA for your family if they want your body back although God knows why they would want it! PS; By using you/your I am talking generally and not at a specific poster! -
Looking for something that doesnt exist
scottiejohn replied to bignok's topic in ASEAN NOW Community Pub
As we know from the OP and some of his fellow posters! -
Price of packed rice to go up by ฿3/kg in September
scottiejohn replied to webfact's topic in Thailand News
You missed out that the reduction is not immediate and is aimed at 2030 and that the environment is NOT the primary reason! I suggest they are hooking the climate change agenda to their financial decision to try and give it some "legitimacy! The move is aimed at “boosting the exports of high-quality rice, ensuring domestic food security, protecting the environment and adapting to climate change,” according to the government document, dated May 26 and reviewed by Reuters. https://www.reuters.com/article/vietnam-rice-idAFL1N37O016 -
Worst Joke Ever 2025
scottiejohn replied to warfie's topic in Jokes - Puzzles and Riddles - Make My Day!
Don't worry you will get over it in time! -
Looking for something that doesnt exist
scottiejohn replied to bignok's topic in ASEAN NOW Community Pub
He would certainly have an excellent role model to follow! -
Worst Joke Ever 2025
scottiejohn replied to warfie's topic in Jokes - Puzzles and Riddles - Make My Day!
There once lived a strong, Native American man who had only one testicle! Everyone in the village called him "One stone" because of this, but nobody dared to say it to his face because he would kill anyone who directly said it him. Unfortunately, a woman in the village named Bluebird did not know about this. One morning, while she was walking past One Stone, she greeted him by saying "Hello, One Stone". He immediately took her into the woods, and made love to her until she died from exhaustion. Another woman by the name of Yellowbird, who also did not know about One Stone's hatred of his nickname, greeted him one morning, saying "Hi, One Stone!". Once again, One Stone took her into the woods and made love to her all day and night, but she didn't die....... Because you can't kill two birds with one stone! -
Worst Joke Ever 2025
scottiejohn replied to warfie's topic in Jokes - Puzzles and Riddles - Make My Day!
An Angel came down from heaven and visited a park. He saw two statues, one of a naked woman, and one of a naked man. The statues were separated by a path and faced each other. They were covered in moss and bird droppings and looked like they had been in the same position for hundreds of years. The angel took pity on them, he said to himself: why don’t I bring these statues to life, so they can be united. And so he did. As soon as the statues came to live, they took each other’s hand and headed for the bushes. The angel walk around in the park, and when he came back he heard noises coming from the bushes. He leaned in to hear what was going on. He heard the woman saying to the man: "why don’t you hold the pigeon down for a while so I can poo on him." -
Worst Joke Ever 2025
scottiejohn replied to warfie's topic in Jokes - Puzzles and Riddles - Make My Day!
A young boy was kissed by a girl he really liked, but after only a few seconds, the boy abruptly ended his first kiss. "I'm s s sorry, but I can't continue!" he said. "Why not," the girl asked, "didn't you like it?" "No, that's not it," the boy replied. "It's my mom. She said that if I kiss a girl before I'm sixteen, I'll turn into a statue." "I had to stop as I could feel it starting to happen already!" -
Worst Joke Ever 2025
scottiejohn replied to warfie's topic in Jokes - Puzzles and Riddles - Make My Day!
A Kiwi, an Australian and a Welshman are hanging out together on a farm... The Kiwi notices a sheep that has become stuck in fence trying to squeeze in between the rails. "I'll just be a minute, lads" says the Kiwi as he runs over and humps the helpless sheep. After a good tussle, he rejoins his comrades as the Aussie pipes up: "Well, I don't see why not!" He then runs over and humps the sheep. The Welshman waits for the Aussie to pull up his trousers and saunters over the poor, ravaged sheep. He grabs her by the hind legs and pulls her out of the fence. "What are you doing? Don't you want to have a go?" asks the Kiwi. "I need to turn her over first" replies the Welshman. "But....why?" asks the Aussie. Exasperated by the ignorance of his companions, the Welshman looks back and replies: "How else do you expect me to kiss her?" -
Worst Joke Ever 2025
scottiejohn replied to warfie's topic in Jokes - Puzzles and Riddles - Make My Day!
I can't believe the suicide hotline put my cousin on hold. They left him hanging. -
Worst Joke Ever 2025
scottiejohn replied to warfie's topic in Jokes - Puzzles and Riddles - Make My Day!
I've realized that suicide would solve all my problems.... ...if I could just get the right people to do it to themselves! -
Looking for something that doesnt exist
scottiejohn replied to bignok's topic in ASEAN NOW Community Pub
Too late going by the lack of quality and content of his posts! -
Trump's court and campaign schedule is looking chaotic
scottiejohn replied to Social Media's topic in World News
The MEGA I used earlier was not a mistype! I used it in it's Greek meaning! PS; The conditions of one road in a Country do not mean that it is a reflection of that Country on a whole! I suggest you get back on topic! -
Worst Joke Ever 2025
scottiejohn replied to warfie's topic in Jokes - Puzzles and Riddles - Make My Day!
Or could it be a Muslim suicide school? -
Worst Joke Ever 2025
scottiejohn replied to warfie's topic in Jokes - Puzzles and Riddles - Make My Day!
Probably gets a better response from the tuna tin! Especially if it's tunaed in to his tastes!