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ballpoint

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    My mate accidently sat on a lettuce and got it wedged up his behind. The doctor put a dressing on it.
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    A lorry load of ballroom dancing gowns has crashed on the motorway. Drivers have been advised to go slow, slow, quick, quick, slow.
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    I bought a head of lettuce from a small grocery shop called Mama’s and Papa’s. I can’t eat it though, because all the leaves are brown.
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    I got pulled over by the police last night driving home from the pub. The copper asked me if I’d had a drink. I told him I’d had eight pints of Guinness, two large whiskys and four sambucca shots. He said I’m going to have to ask you blow into this tube. I said why? Don’t you believe me?
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