So whats wrong with your home country

[Gruff]

4 minutes ago, bazza73 said:

And your track record is?

Loser initially  but ultimately  the winner

[oldhippy]

Meanwhile, the topic is (or should be):

 

so-whats-wrong-with-your-home-country?

[transam]

1 minute ago, Gruff said:

Loser initially  but ultimately  the winner

Don't think any of us know that until death us do part...

[Gruff]

1 hour ago, richard_smith237 said:

 

Fair enough... then you've been unlucky twice, or have twice chosen poorly... not everyone is in that same position. Could you have ever been in a position to meet a Thai lady of equal socio-economic-educational status? would your attitudes have been different had you had a successful relationship with a financially independent lady?... Or is it your attitudes towards women which prevented you from meeting such a person in the first place?

 

Chicken or the egg...   Did 'your truth' prevent you from meeting someone who 'wasn't in it for the money'?... It is perhaps some extremely jaded opinions which prevent many guys from having a normal, natural relationship with someone equal to themselves. 

 

With that said: It is noted that there is a huge spectrum of guys coming to Thailand for a multitude of reasons and the women they meet will also be spread across the spectrum, and it can be fair to suggest that a there is a majority of guys who for whatever reasons settled for someone who was financially dependent on them and as you wrote MaeJoeMTB, if they can live with the truth thats fair enough.

 

However, it would be quite foolish of these guys to make the flawed assumption that 'all women are in it for the money' which seems to be the 'line' of a few posters who have failed to experience anything other than 'paying for it in the end' as for many thats not the reason they came here, its not the reason they still live here. For many there are still choices and being in a position where they can meet women because they believe they are perceived (or are perceived) as being 'financially desirable'  or simply just 'paying for it out right' is not high up in their list of priorities....  

 

....maybe those priorities change with age, perhaps thats what posters such as yourself are alluding to and if so we also have to recognize that the priorities of those younger than ourselves are also quite different. 

 

I have been thinking back to my frends and work colleagues back in the UK, They are all with gf / wife and without exception both parties have been brought up with equal opportunities and are of broadly similar intelligence levels. However in every single case the guy is still the prime breadwinner, even if there have been children they are all now grown and independent but still the breadwinner situation is the same.. So why is this the case?

Edited November 15, 2017 by Gruff

[richard_smith237]

8 minutes ago, Gruff said:

 Nice guy you are aren't you? Yes i made a silly reading error, apologies but saying i have the reading comprehension of an 8 year old!  How insulting you are,

 

 

That was a slur agains those of questionable comprehension, apologies if you took it personally. 

 

 

[transam]

4 minutes ago, Gruff said:

 

I have been thinking back to my frends and work colleagues back in the UK, They are all with gf / wife and without exception both parties have been brought up with equal opportunities and are of broadly similar intelligence levels. However in every single case the guy is still the prime breadwinner, even if their have been children they are all now grown and independent but still the breadwinner situation is the same.. So why is this the case?

It is because they are your friends.....Your experience....There is a big wide world out there where lives maybe different...

[opalred]

when i grow 4inch hair all over the body  i will return

[Gruff]

17 minutes ago, transam said:

Don't think any of us know that until death us do part...

 I meant i think bad experiences have actually led to a more interesting life.

[MaeJoMTB]

25 minutes ago, Gruff said:

 Nice guy you are aren't you? Yes i made a silly reading error, apologies but saying i have the reading comprehension of an 8 year old!  How insulting you are,

Don't go 'postal' ....... 555

[sanemax]

9 minutes ago, Gruff said:

 

I have been thinking back to my frends and work colleagues back in the UK, They are all with gf / wife and without exception both parties have been brought up with equal opportunities and are of broadly similar intelligence levels. However in every single case the guy is still the prime breadwinner, even if there have been children they are all now grown and independent but still the breadwinner situation is the same.. So why is this the case?

The Woman takes a few years off work to have Children and thus misses out on pay rises and promotion and may not even go back to work , even if She did , she may have to take a low paying job as she may not be up to pace with the ever changing workplace practices

[transam]

1 minute ago, Gruff said:

 I meant i think bad experiences have actually led to a more interesting life.

In some way l suppose it has for me...A chapter of my life...See what's next, or the epilogue....

[richard_smith237]

5 minutes ago, Gruff said:

 

I have been thinking back to my frends and work colleagues back in the UK, They are all with gf / wife and without exception both parties have been brought up with equal opportunities and are of broadly similar intelligence levels. However in every single case the guy is still the prime breadwinner, even if their have been children they are all now grown and independent but still the breadwinner situation is the same.. So why is this the case?

 

I would draw similar comparisons but would point out that there was a general level of equality with regards to earning potential up to the point children arrived at which point the ladies career was put on hold in some cases for a short time, in others more permanently. 

 

Men continue to have greater earning potential and as such decisions will be made to suit him rather than her confirming him as the prime-bread winner. 

 

This is not the same as women being financially dependent on men. Having a partner who contributes is very different.

 

In the UK there is a far greater chance of having a partner who contributes on a level some in Thailand may non consider worth while, this is purely due to the economic differences between our nations, but that is not to say women here cannot contribute financially for they can and commonly do on each an every level of society, some of my friends (Thai and Western) Thai wives have significant earning potential (perhaps more so than many of us reading this thread).

 

 

[watcharacters]

On 11/14/2017 at 8:54 AM, Ruffian Dick said:

California is wonderful but too expensive for me to retire there with my meager savings. Not warm enough either.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect

 

 

 

 

I fully agree about the cost of living in California but for sure that is partially a function of WHERE  a person lives within the state.    After the latest "mass killing" I looked up information about the area where it occurred in California.         I found prices were very low  for houses in a relative sense.    Would I want to live there?   A resounding NO as it's in the middle of nowhere. 

 

There's also the egregious tax from the CFTB to throw more dollars at a  state which  has overlooked needed  upgrades for a long time.

 

Other than arctic or  tropic   climates, I'd say California has  all the others.   (it does have subtropic, however.)

 

If you spent a year in Death Valley you would certainly appreciate   the meaning of the word HOT! (record 56.7 C.)    You'd also know what cold means..

 

On the other hand,  if one were to venture to the High Sierras, incredible colds can be found.

Edited November 15, 2017 by watcharacters

[Jonah Tenner]

49 minutes ago, bazza73 said:

I'm pretty sure in all my relationships I was the selectee, not the selector.

Ditto

[CG1 Blue]

3 hours ago, giddyup said:

It would be no different in a western country where the man is the breadwinner and the woman the homemaker

If you said these words in the UK these days you would probably be arrested for some kind of ism.

[transam]

17 minutes ago, Jonah Tenner said:

Ditto

[Orton Rd]

Too much PC multicultural celebrating diversity nonsense in the UK, and far too many Muslim immigrants who cannot or will not integrate.

[Tilacme]

34 degrees, on a hammock in my hanging orchid garden, being provided with cold beer by my beautiful Thai wife, why would I want to be anywhere else!

[giddyup]

28 minutes ago, CG1 Blue said:

If you said these words in the UK these days you would probably be arrested for some kind of ism.

If you are going to quote me, quote me in full. It would be no different in a western country where the man is the breadwinner and the woman the homemaker, and sometimes it's the reverse. As you see I was saying that the woman can also be the provider. Nothing discriminatory about my comment.

Edited November 15, 2017 by giddyup

[richard_smith237]

4 minutes ago, Tilacme said:

34 degrees, on a hammock in my hanging orchid garden, being provided with cold beer by my beautiful Thai wife, why would I want to be anywhere else!

 

[Playing Devils Advocate for a moment]....  In a quaint old countryside pub, roaring fire... excellent ale...

 

Both have their advantages... for me its a case of  'the grass is always greener on the other side'...... when its cold and miserable in the UK the 34 degree's C in Thailand seems attractive. When I'm sweating into my lunch in Thailand the cool of the UK would be welcomed. 

 

The overbearing humidity in Thailand is one aspect of life here which I don't enjoy. I would love it to be Thai December weather all year round. Equally so for 4 weeks a year the UK summer is also wonderful for the majority of the British Winter is downright awful. 

 

Perhaps the warmth of Thailand edges it, but we've had so much torrential rain here in Bangkok this year.

[transam]

15 minutes ago, Tilacme said:

34 degrees, on a hammock in my hanging orchid garden, being provided with cold beer by my beautiful Thai wife, why would I want to be anywhere else!

What happened when yo woke up....

[CG1 Blue]

2 hours ago, richard_smith237 said:

would your attitudes have been different had you had a successful relationship with a financially independent lady?

I think the point is that financially independent 'modern' women, certainly in the west, are not what the more traditionally minded men want. We have to face the fact that some men like the old traditional man/woman roles, while some have embraced the "I want to be equal with men, but I still want them to open doors for me" mentality.

Personally I like the traditional roles, and you're more likely to find that in LOS. Giving financial support as part of that relationship sounds perfectly reasonable to me.

[Gruff]

13 minutes ago, giddyup said:

If you are going to quote me, quote me in full. It would be no different in a western country where the man is the breadwinner and the woman the homemaker, and sometimes it's the reverse. As you see I was saying that the woman can also be the provider. Nothing discriminatory about my comment.

 

I thnk it is more likely to be in reverse in the West than Thailand but  i don't actually know of any examples n the UK either. I get the impression than even wealthy women don't want to be the provider, such women are more likely to seek an even wealthier man.

[giddyup]

Just now, Gruff said:

 

I thnk it is more likely to be in reverse in the West than Thailand but  i don't actually know of any examples n the UK either. I get the impression than even wealthy women don't want to be the provider, such women are more likely to seek an even wealthier man.

Plenty of guys have lost their jobs in western countries and had to rely on the wife or GF for support.

[NanLaew]

The UK is my country of birth and always has been my Plan A. Thailand is my current country of abode (and current work unfortunately) but it has always been at most my Plan B.

 

Absolutely nothing wrong with Scotland; a home in the Trossachs or in the Great Glen or up in Findhorn on the Moray Firth or down in the Borders.

[MaeJoMTB]

14 minutes ago, richard_smith237 said:

[Playing Devils Advocate for a moment]....  In a quaint old countryside pub, roaring fire... excellent ale...

You're wet from getting there, and you'll have a problem driving home. Not to mention 5 quid a drink.

Sitting on my sofa, windows wide open and 2x 3x Full Moon wine coolers at 30bht each.

Not to mention I can put you on ignore, while the guys in the pub will nut me.

 

Pork steak (35bht) in the fridge, chips in the chest freezer, HP sauce on the table.

Can life get any better?

Edited November 15, 2017 by MaeJoMTB

[MaeJoMTB]

8 minutes ago, Gruff said:

 

I thnk it is more likely to be in reverse in the West than Thailand but  i don't actually know of any examples n the UK either. I get the impression than even wealthy women don't want to be the provider, such women are more likely to seek an even wealthier man.

I've never encountered it either, they all marry up.

Briffault's Law, females control access to sex, where no benefit to the female is available, no relationship will exist.

[CG1 Blue]

23 minutes ago, giddyup said:

If you are going to quote me, quote me in full. It would be no different in a western country where the man is the breadwinner and the woman the homemaker, and sometimes it's the reverse. As you see I was saying that the woman can also be the provider. Nothing discriminatory about my comment.

I was just having a rant about how crazy things are in the UK right now.  I didn't intend to suggest anything you said was discriminatory.

[richard_smith237]

Just now, MaeJoMTB said:

You're wet from getting there, and you'll have a problem driving home. Not to mention 5 quid a drink.

Sitting on my sofa, windows wide open and 2x Full Moon wine coolers at 30bht each.

Not to mention I can put you on ignore, while the guys in the pub will nut me.

I've been there all afternoon after enjoying a fantastic pub-lunch.... the Ale is something that cannot be replaced by the beer in Thailand where craft beer is nearly double at 200 baht for a 33cl glass of Punk IPA....

 

I'd get soaked on the way home but wouldn't give a hoot - I'd miss Thailands weather the following day when the cold I caught starts to kick in !... 

 

Before you put me on ignore or nut me... what on earth is a Full Moon Wine cooler ? is it cheaper than gasoline and will the car run on it ?

 

 

[Tilacme]

17 minutes ago, richard_smith237 said:

 

[Playing Devils Advocate for a moment]....  In a quaint old countryside pub, roaring fire... excellent ale...

 

Both have their advantages... for me its a case of  'the grass is always greener on the other side'...... when its cold and miserable in the UK the 34 degree's C in Thailand seems attractive. When I'm sweating into my lunch in Thailand the cool of the UK would be welcomed. 

 

The overbearing humidity in Thailand is one aspect of life here which I don't enjoy. I would love it to be Thai December weather all year round. Equally so for 4 weeks a year the UK summer is also wonderful for the majority of the British Winter is downright awful. 

 

Perhaps the warmth of Thailand edges it, but we've had so much torrential rain here in Bangkok this year.

I dare say that a Spoons down the road serving curry Thursdays and Sunday roasts would add to my wellbeing but hey, maipenria.