Isaan Love Triangle: Thai Men Found Lacking By Farang-Loving Women

[Russell17au]

A lot of farang men that I have met do nothing but whinge and complain about Thai women only using all men as ATM's. Maybe those farangs need to have a good hard look in the mirror at themselves because a lot of them are nothing but drunk butterflies that don't know how to treat a woman in the first place even back home in their own country.

I'm 73 and I am married to a 46 year old that really knows how to look after me (get your filthy minds out of the gutter) neither her or her family have ever put their hand out for money, actually it is quite the opposite. My wife works at a well paid respectable job (not a bar girl) and she pays for all the food and many of the other household goods. She was married and has 2 children to her ex Thai husband. She divorced her Thai husband because he was a drunken druggie that could not keep his little dick out of other women. She does not want or need money from me, but what she does want is love, faith, respect, caring, affection and honesty which I have no problem giving her. I am not saying that all Thai women are like my wife even back in Australia it was hard to find a woman that was not after your money and to control your life, that is one of the reasons I live in Thailand. I say do not generalize and brand all people of a particular sex, nationality or religion the same because it just shows your own ignorance and arrogance

[faraday]

As above.

[SoulWater]

This is classic - so as a 73 year old man you are saying you have never given anything to your 46 year old wife? You must be trolling dude

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[Russell17au]

3 minutes ago, SoulWater said:

This is classic - so as a 73 year old man you are saying you have never given anything to your 46 year old wife? You must be trolling dude

Sent from my SM-J710F using Thailand Forum - Thaivisa mobile app
 

You should really go back to school and learn to read because at no point did I say I did not give my wife anything or that I do not pay for anything. What I said was that my wife does not put her hand out for money and that she buys the food and pays for some of the household items. If you cannot understand that then you are the troll

[SoulWater]

You should really go back to school and learn to read because at no point did I say I did not give my wife anything or that I do not pay for anything. What I said was that my wife does not put her hand out for money and that she buys the food and pays for some of the household items. If you cannot understand that then you are the troll

I didn't mean to offend you sir - I was merely pointing out that in order to spend time with the ladies we care about in this lovely country that we sometimes need to put our hands on our pockets - my misses never puts her hands out but sometimes it's implied if you know what I mean

[Russell17au]

3 minutes ago, SoulWater said:

I didn't mean to offend you sir - I was merely pointing out that in order to spend time with the ladies we care about in this lovely country that we sometimes need to put our hands on our pockets - my misses never puts her hands out but sometimes it's implied if you know what I mean

My wife works close to the market so through the day she goes and buys the food that she wants to cook that night and there is a Big C that is also close by and if she thinks that she needs a new pan or something then she goes and buys it and pays for it out of her own money, we go out for dinner at least 1 sometimes 2 times a week for which I pay for, sometimes if we go shopping and see a nice microwave and we need a new one then I buy it and pay for it. Our marriage is a shared marriage where neither of us put our hand out to the other for money, we share things

[Bill Miller]

16 hours ago, moe666 said:

Yes it is about money they have bills to pay just like anyone else. How are they to feed their kids, send them to school, and see the DR. when needed without money. Some of the dumbest people around must post here if they do not realize it is about money

The money is after the word "and", and after her initial paragraph "“It’s not just about money, but they’re unfaithful and always cheating on women. They don’t take responsibility for their family, ..."
I am one of the smartest people around and able to comprehend the very plain statement that "Its not just about money..."
Naturally you know better than the woman what she REALLY meant.

[SoulWater]

The money is after the word "and", and after her initial paragraph "“It’s not just about money, but they’re unfaithful and always cheating on women. They don’t take responsibility for their family, ..."
I am one of the smartest people around and able to comprehend the very plain statement that "Its not just about money..."
Naturally you know better than the woman what she REALLY meant.

Dude, I am not sure if I have a correct grasp on English language but I have read your post about 10 times and I still don't have a clue what it means - sorry bro

[Bill Miller]

In traditional Thai culture, as I understand it, it is the duty of the man to work and bring in what is needed for the family to live.
It is the woman's duty to care for the kids, home, and manage the daily.finances.
It seems like for a significant percentage of the male population, and especially in Issan, these cultural imperatives have been derailed.
The men, rather than accepting responsibility for their lack of performance, seem, in my limited experience, to blame the women and the farangs for their sorry lot rather than getting sober and trying to find a job.
Many women do contribute to this, first by mollycoddling their sons, and then by cuckolding their farang providers with a gik.
Who can blame a Thai man if he can get the milk for no effort?
My girlfriend pointed out to me on our first trip to Chiang Mai to visit family the small house of an English fellow whose wife had kicked  him out to live with her Thai lover in the house he had bought her. She visits a couple of times each month to "take care of him", whatever that might mean.
I am fairly confident that my GF does not have a side piece. Fairly. She did seem to be in a bit of admiration for the arrangement.. 

[leither69]

20 hours ago, Boon Mee said:

Well, it's because the Farang have more money? 

Not ? rocket surgery here... 

 

Sometimes yes! Sometimes no!

[SoulWater]

In traditional Thai culture, as I understand it, it is the duty of the man to work and bring in what is needed for the family to live.
It is the woman's duty to care for the kids, home, and manage the daily.finances.
It seems like for a significant percentage of the male population, and especially in Issan, these cultural imperatives have been derailed.
The men, rather than accepting responsibility for their lack of performance, seem, in my limited experience, to blame the women and the farangs for their sorry lot rather than getting sober and trying to find a job.
Many women do contribute to this, first by mollycoddling their sons, and then by cuckolding their farang providers with a gik.
Who can blame a Thai man if he can get the milk for no effort?
My girlfriend pointed out to me on our first trip to Chiang Mai to visit family the small house of an English fellow whose wife had kicked  him out to live with her Thai lover in the house he had bought her. She visits a couple of times each month to "take care of him", whatever that might mean.
I am fairly confident that my GF does not have a side piece. Fairly. She did seem to be in a bit of admiration for the arrangement.. 

Respect! I mean that a lot of thai ways summarised in a few short paragraphs

[bheard]

In many cases there ends up being a secret Thai boyfriend in the background, one guy I new was married to a Young Thai lady and when he went back to work on the rigs the Thai BF moved into the house, the whole village new and laughed about it.

Says a lot about the 'whole village'.

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[totally thaied up]

9 hours ago, cyberfarang said:

Regardless that most Thais believe we have cash coming out of our ears and a dollar is just a drop in the ocean, the reality is that the majority of us are living monthly on budgets. I would love to be able to go out socilising a few times a month, have the odd rent a girlfriend on occasions but I simply can`t afford it and I guess this applies to many of us.

This makes a good point.

 

Many of the Thai girls I dated before could not spell the word budget, and I fast left them. My wife is an accountant, and everything we do goes into a budget app on her iPad. She even maps out where we are eating for the night or is she home cooking for a few days. The power and phone bills are forward estimated, and cash is left in individual cards at the end of the month to pay such bills. Not all Thais are ill equipt to plan ahead.

 

Our yearly health insurance is mapped out and stashes money away for that. When renovating the house, she can pull off the iPad the price of nails and even costs per hour on tradesmen's names. Other Thai girls I dated after a few days only wanted to know if I had a budget of 4,000 baht a month for Mother and 3,000 baht for the Father and 2,000 baht for the young sister going to school and could I pay her mobile bill as well. Suddenly a child from a Thai man would come in the mix but it never got past that point as I use to move them on. I could never educate or look after someone else's child, no matter the age.

 

9 hours ago, cyberfarang said:

Unlike in the past Thailand is not the cheap adult playground it used to be, completely different to how Thailand is depicted in the west as a country where beautiful young desirable Thai woman are lusting over any males who have a white skin, regardless of age and financial status. Those days are long gone.

This is true. Those days are long gone. I miss those times but then, I do not miss the now great internet we have and other new ends and mods in some excellent shopping malls and the such. What I notice is a new generation of girls being much smarter than the older ones if they have an education. 

 

So now, it is not much much different to the West in wanting to do better. My wifes younger friends say my wife is lucky to have me (my wife is 31) but myself being 48, they say I am just too old for them and my lacking of a good education would be too much of a loss of face to the family. Yep, it can be pretty strange and twisted at times!

 

So, yes some Thai women are picky as well.

 

9 hours ago, cyberfarang said:

The old saying in Thailand; no money, no honey, is a fact. Don`t have enough money and I mean a lot of money, then they can delete women off the menu.

Yes, this is true but for a just a few baht, I know several places in just the outer areas of my district, having a permanent gik for just for a few hours is possible every weekend but you just got to like older women. 

 

Still, it comes around to money once again.

[jenny2017]

1 hour ago, Russell17au said:

A lot of farang men that I have met do nothing but whinge and complain about Thai women only using all men as ATM's. Maybe those farangs need to have a good hard look in the mirror at themselves because a lot of them are nothing but drunk butterflies that don't know how to treat a woman in the first place even back home in their own country.

I'm 73 and I am married to a 46 year old that really knows how to look after me (get your filthy minds out of the gutter) neither her or her family have ever put their hand out for money, actually it is quite the opposite. My wife works at a well paid respectable job (not a bar girl) and she pays for all the food and many of the other household goods. She was married and has 2 children to her ex Thai husband. She divorced her Thai husband because he was a drunken druggie that could not keep his little dick out of other women. She does not want or need money from me, but what she does want is love, faith, respect, caring, affection and honesty which I have no problem giving her. I am not saying that all Thai women are like my wife even back in Australia it was hard to find a woman that was not after your money and to control your life, that is one of the reasons I live in Thailand. I say do not generalize and brand all people of a particular sex, nationality or religion the same because it just shows your own ignorance and arrogance

Wishful thinking? Your wife looks after you, pays for all and calling your wife’s ex’ husband somebody with a little one shows your ignorance.

 

Have you seen him naked that you made such a statement, or are you such a great lover who believes that all Thai men have a little one?  

 

Perhaps some women prefer a smaller, but harder one than yours?

 

BTW, I wouldn’t want my wife to pay for all her food, in the end, I married her because I love her. I’m now wondering who the ignorant and arrogant person on this threat really is.

 

My wife’s one year older than yours, and I’m 15 years younger than you are. I’m not a drunk, I go to work and pay for all in our household.

 

My wife doesn’t work, but even when she would, I’d never want her to pay for her own food. That can never be a good relationship, sorry. Regardless what you believe.

 

   You'd be the first foreigner who's so loved that his wife doesn't want anything else than love. But your age difference tells a different story. No intention of hurting you, but you might have a look in a mirror?

[cyberfarang]

9 hours ago, FrenchguyStick said:

 

Wrong.
Man, yes I am young, but is about 5 years I live in Thailand, 2 years in Isaan ... We never spent time in France since we are married and I not plan at all to go in my country asap if you want to know 

Out of interest, what do you do in Thailand? Just wondering how a westerner so young manages to stay in Thailand?

[cyberfarang]

FrenchGuyStick told me I am wrong, yet fails to say what he does in Thailand.

[Berkshire]

14 hours ago, totally thaied up said:

My wife has a swag of friends looking for a farang, and she is always getting asked if I have any friends free. I refuse to be caught up in anything like an introduction now for a few reasons.

 

Good idea to get out of the matchmaking business.  I've been set-up a few times and in every instance--every single time--the woman had issues.  Usually she wasn't attractive, but also uneducated/no prospects, or single mother, or just plain old.  Attractive, quality Thai women simply don't need or want to be set-up.  It's always the hideous ones with major defects that are begging for a farang. 

[seancbk]

42 minutes ago, cyberfarang said:

FrenchGuyStick told me I am wrong, yet fails to say what he does in Thailand.

 

Does it matter what he does here?

Given his choice to live in Isaan, I'm going to guess he isn't loaded and has taken early retirement.   

 

[wildewillie89]

15 hours ago, cyberfarang said:

Fake. The young French guy in the photo is seen being able to totally assimilate into a Thai cultural lifestyle with what seems to be with absolutely no problems.

 

The reality; at his age he would not to be able to legally work within that Thai community and any Farlangs working at jobs usually reserved for poor Thais, such as farming etc, would be resented and probably experience much prejudice as a foreigner seen encroaching on the Thais turf. These Thai women marry Farlangs mostly for reasons of financial security and that young guy would have problems supporting himself let alone a Thai wife having high expectations of him. The majority of Farlang husbands in that region will be old men 50 and over that have accumulated life savings and assets over their lifetimes including now having pension incomes coming in from abroad. The young Frenchman probably has photos taken portraying himself doing his bit for a poor third world community as a do gooder and then returns to France with his Thai wife/girlfriend.

He doesn't look that young, as long as he is what, 22 (and educated), he would be able to find at least the most basic legal job in the country. 

Edited December 1, 2017 by wildewillie89

[helloagain]

On 30/11/2017 at 12:28 PM, Mister Fixit said:

Thai men are lacking in what way? Size of wallet or size of something else ... ?

Both

[wildewillie89]

4 hours ago, cyberfarang said:

Out of interest, what do you do in Thailand? Just wondering how a westerner so young manages to stay in Thailand?

Maybe married into a good family who look after him? Maybe has his own money back home and works a legal job here to pay for what he needs to? Maybe got lucky in life and has retired. It is his life so it really doesn't matter how he gets by. 

I moved here in my mid 20s, license got switched over to a Thai license, vehicles were provided for me, found a legal job, did some extra outside work, don't have to pay any insurance as I receive free healthcare (something most Thais don't even get), don't have to pay the wife or family anything as they have jobs, and the government pays half the Mrs home loan so don't have to pay for a house I am not entitled to. My legal job goes towards the children and dogs. The Mrs is set for a 45k monthly pension when retire so financial security is not an issue for her. So she chooses someone she wants, not someone she desperately needs. I know quite a few Thai/farang around my age in similar positions. 

It is 2017 now, Thai women have more opportunities than they did before re study/work, so are not forced to marry grandpas for financial security. As much as members on this forum like to think that they choose grandpas because they are so hot they are tired of young alpha men chasing them (as another member wrote not long ago which gave me a good laugh). 

Edited December 1, 2017 by wildewillie89

[mommysboy]

34 minutes ago, wildewillie89 said:

He doesn't look that young, as long as he is what, 22 (and educated), he would be able to find at least the most basic legal job in the country. 

LIke what?  Teaching requires a degree.

[JLCrab]

13 minutes ago, wildewillie89 said:

<snip> The Mrs is set for a 45k monthly pension when retire so financial security is not an issue for her. <snip2>

Inflation adjusted? 

 

Edited December 1, 2017 by JLCrab

[JLCrab]

12 minutes ago, wildewillie89 said:

<snip> As much as members on this forum like to think that they choose grandpas because they are so hot they are tired of young alpha men chasing them (as another member wrote not long ago which gave me a good laugh). 

If you saw the girl in question, you wouldn't be laughing.

[seancbk]

6 minutes ago, mommysboy said:

LIke what?  Teaching requires a degree.

 

Why can't he have a degree at 22?   

[wildewillie89]

1 minute ago, JLCrab said:

If you saw the girl in question, you wouldn't be laughing.

Speak of the devil

[JLCrab]

That's right -- and another one of your gigolo posts.

[wildewillie89]

You just let them get to you so much. It is okay. You have your hot stuff :)

[SoulWater]

@wildewillie89
"The Mrs is set for a 45k monthly pension when retire so financial security is not an issue for her."

And you believe that? :) what was her job In Thailand?

[Tilacme]

1 hour ago, cyberfarang said:

FrenchGuyStick told me I am wrong, yet fails to say what he does in Thailand.

Perhaps because it's none of your business.