Once upon a time there was a sparrow flying home at dusk...suddenly it started to rain...and the little bird got wet....but he carried on flying.....then he flew through a cold front....and the water on his body froze.

Unable to fly, he slowly fluttered to the ground, and prepared himself for death.

However, he had landed in a field in which there was a cow, which ,in passing, dropped a load of <deleted> on him.

The heat from the cowpat melted the ice, and the sparrow was so happy to be warm, that he started to chirrup.

Unfortunately, a passing cat heard the noise,scraped away the top layer,pulled out the bird, and ate it.

There are three lessons to be learned from this tale:

1. If someone sh*ts on you, they are not necessarily your enemy.

2 If someone gets you out of the sh*t, they are not necessarily your friend.

3 If you are in the sh*t and happy, keep your bloody mouth shut!

And if you shit on a bird better make sure there are no cats around?