Worst Joke Ever 2024

[Zyxel]

[Zyxel]

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Australian safety sign

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[ravip]

[ravip]

[dcsw53]

[overherebc]

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TODAY'S TRIVIA FACT
Although Jesus was known as a carpenter,
he never actually sang on any of their albums.

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Swampy the eco-warrior has died of a heart attack.
They offered him a bypass, but he wasn't having any of it.

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Martin Scorsese's film "The Wolf of Wall Street" broke a record by using the word "F***" or "F***ing" 506 times.
That actually beats my record, set in 2013, trying to put an Ikea wardrobe together...

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"Don't forget, on the 34th of March, clocks go sideways"

Diane Abbot

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I've just been reading a poignant and very sad story about the decline of independent bookshops which used to be on every high street in the country.
Great read, and I got it for only £3.99 on Amazon.

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The Institute of Unfinished Research has concluded that 38% of people don't

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How many pedants does it take to change a lightbulb?
The correct term is 'replace', actually.

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Fuel has become so expensive that taxi drivers have actually started taking the shortest route.

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A mate of mine had a nasty accident when he came off his bike and skidded along on his backside for about fifty metres.
I was wondering if it is possible to donate the skin from your buttocks to be grafted onto someone else?
Just ar5e skin for a friend...

 

 

 

Edited March 26, 2022 by ballpoint

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Top tip for those about to take a driving test.
When the examiner asks "What sign would you expect to see down a narrow country lane?"
"Fresh farm eggs for sale’ isn’t the answer.

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Thought for the day:
If blues singers woke up in the afternoon,
they wouldn't be so depressed.

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Fact of the day:
Hippos can run faster than humans on land, and swim faster than humans in water.

Which means the bicycle is your only chance of beating a hippo in a triathlon.

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What's the difference between Anusol and Deep Heat?
I'll tell you once I've finished crying.