Worst Joke Ever 2024

[dcsw53]

[dcsw53]

[dcsw53]

[oxo1947]

.

[oxo1947]

 

 

NEVER buy a baseball cap made in China...

 

[chickenslegs]

[ravip]

5 hours ago, ballpoint said:

Seems legitimate...

 

Nigerian astronaut lost in space needs $3m to get home

Should we start a gofundme account?

[scottiejohn]

3 hours ago, dcsw53 said:

I hope that is bread stick (loaf) in his other hand!

[scottiejohn]

[scottiejohn]

[scottiejohn]

[scottiejohn]

A man walks into a bakery, points to some bread and asks;
'Is this Gluten free?'

Cashier: No. 
It costs £4.50

[scottiejohn]

Another slice of the same!

 

Two slices of bread got married.
The ceremony was going quite well!

Until that is someone decided to toast the bride and groom.

[scottiejohn]

God decides it’s finally time to send Jesus back to Earth.
*poof*

All of a sudden, Jesus finds himself on the side of a road in the middle of rural America. He sticks out his thumb for a ride and before long a man in a truck stops to give him a lift.

Not revealing his true identity, Jesus thanks the man for stopping.

Jesus:

Wow thank you sir, so many people just ignored me standing there.

Man: don’t worry about it! That’s just what good people do.

 

After a few minutes driving the man leans over,

 

Man: Hey, I have this sandwich here, ya want some?

Jesus: wow, thank you sir, that’s so kind of you! I’d love some.

 

A few more minutes pass and the man leans over again,

Man: Hey I have a few beers in the cooler back there, want one?

Amazed by the man’s kindness Jesus replies,

Jesus: wow sure! I’d love one. Thank you again.

 

After a few more miles down the road the man looks around suspiciously and says,

Man: hey…I uh, have a little joint here. Want to take a few puffs with me?

Jesus pauses for a second and replies,

Jesus: ya know what, why not!

 

So the man and Jesus drive down the road smoking the fattest joint listening to music and having a good time.

 

Finally, Jesus speaks up,

Jesus: okay listen! I can’t keep quiet any longer! You have been so kind, so nice, I want to tell you…I’m Jesus! God sent me down here to help the people and you’ve just been so kind. What can I do to repay you? Anything!

 

The man looks at Jesus with a grin on his face and says,

“Good sh!t, aint'it huh?”

 

[KannikaP]

[billd766]

3 hours ago, ravip said:

Should we start a gofundme account?

I have 25 satang that I am willing to donate, provided the Nigerians pay all the bank charges first.

 

That should not cost more than USD $100,000 in cash and untraceable notes.

[MJCM]

The shortest sentence is I am. The longest sentence is I do.

[still kicking]

6 minutes ago, MJCM said:

The shortest sentence is I am. The longest sentence is I do.

[MJCM]

Dung beetle walks into a bar.... 

 

“Is this stool taken?”

[roo860]

[MJCM]

I just told my suitcases that we are not going on holiday this year. 

 

Now, I'm dealing with emotional baggage.

[MJCM]

[ravip]

1 hour ago, roo860 said:

Might not be a joke in the future?

[ballpoint]

[VocalNeal]

^ In our house "You take the Chihuahua"

[ballpoint]

[ballpoint]

[ballpoint]

[ballpoint]

[ballpoint]