Desert Island Dreams.....!

[redrus]

A normal 40 something, having split from his latest

girl friend, decided to take a vacation. He booked

himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have

the time of his life, that is, until the ship sank. He

found himself on an island with no other people, no

supplies, nothing, only bananas and coconuts.

After about four months, he is lying on the beach one

day when the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows

up to the shore. In disbelief, he asks, "Where did you

come from? How did you get here?" She replies, "I

rowed from the other side of the island. I landed here

when my cruise ship sank."

"Amazing," he said. "You were really lucky to have a

row boat wash up with you."

"Oh, this thing?" explains the woman. "I made the boat

out of raw materials I found on the island. The oars

were whittled from gum tree branches, I wove the

bottom from palm branches and the sides and stern came

from a Eucalyptus tree."

"But, where did you get the tools?"

"Oh, that was no problem," replied the woman. "On the

south side of the island, a very unusual stratum of

alluvial rock is exposed. I found if I fired it to a

certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into ductile

iron. I used that for tools and used the tools to make

the hardware."

The guy is stunned.

"Let's row over to my place," she says. After a few

minutes of rowing, she docks the boat at a small

wharf. As the man looks to shore, he nearly falls off

the boat. Before him is a stone walk leading to an

exquisite bungalow painted in blue and white. While

the woman ties up the rowboat with an expertly woven

hemp rope, the man can only stare ahead, dumb struck.

As they walk into the house, she says casually, "It's

not much but I call it home.

Sit down, please. Would you like a drink?" "No! No

thank you," he blurts out, still dazed. "I can't take

another drop of coconut juice."

"It's not coconut juice," winks the woman. "I have a

still. How would you like a Pina Colada?"

Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man

accepts and they sit down on her couch to talk.

After they have exchanged their stories, the woman

announces, "I'm going to slip into something more

comfortable. Would you like to take a shower and

shave? There is a razor in the bathroom cabinet."

No longer questioning anything, the man goes into the

bathroom. There, in the cabinet, a razor made from a

piece of tortoise bone. Two shells honed to a hollow

ground edge are fastened on to its end

inside a swivel mechanism.

"This woman is amazing," he muses. "What next?"

When he returns, she greets him wearing nothing but

vines, strategically positioned, and smelling faintly

of gardenias. She beckons for him to sit down next to

her. "Tell me," she begins suggestively, slithering

closer to him, "We've been out here for many months.

You've been lonely. There's something I'm sure you

really feel like doing right now, something you've

been longing for?" She stares into his eyes. He can't

believe what he's hearing.

"You mean...", and he swallows excitedly and tears

start to form in his eyes.........

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"Don't tell me you've got Sky Sports"

redrus

[peter991]

Actually - I was the guy in your story - but first I asked her ..... if I could check my email.

Peter

[MiG16]

"You mean...", and he swallows excitedly and tears

start to form in his eyes.........

...........

"Don't tell me you've got Sky Sports"

redrus

the joke being posted by redrus...somehow I saw it coming right from the start didnt surprise me at all. you are so predictable

[jasreeve17]

"You mean...", and he swallows excitedly and tears

start to form in his eyes.........

...........

"Don't tell me you've got Sky Sports"

redrus

the joke being posted by redrus...somehow I saw it coming right from the start didnt surprise me at all. you are so predictable

Predictably funny - weel done Redrus. (Oh, how true, too.)