Katoy Brother

[saraburioz]

Here is the situation - my wife has a brother who dresses like a sister. He wears makeup, has small tits but still has a penis, or so the wife thinks.

A big argument is happening with the wife and me. She wants to leave our young sons at his house for a weekend when we go abroad on a business trip, and the boys want to go to because Uncle Noi has a swimming pool, pool table etc.

I have said in nooo terms am I leaving my boys(7 and 5 years old) alone with a katoy.

Am I being unreasonable? homophobic? I'd quite happily leave my young daughter.

My own sister refuses to leave her son in OZ with his gay uncle, who I think is an allright bloke.

Is a Thai cross-dresser a high risk to look after young boys?

Interested to here your opinions - however I don;t think I am going to change my mind

[The Dan Sai Kid]

this is a wind-up right?

[saraburioz]

not at all - a serious predicament we are having

[The Dan Sai Kid]

If you aren't going to change your mind why bother posting...

There are so many arguments why you wrong I really don't know where to start...

[Ijustwannateach]

If your sons are straight, leaving them with the kathoey won't "make" them gay. If they're gay, trying to "hide" them from gay things won't help "make" them straight. Doesn't work that way- if it did, no gay sons would be born to macho fathers, or straight sons to lesbian parents- but they are.

If anything, I'd say that being overly touchy about such things will just get picked up subconsciously by your sons and make them more curious about what you're worried about, which will make you worry more, etc., etc. Relax.

[tingtong]

I think I wouldnt want to leave my son. I can understand you saying nooo. Just as I wouldnt leave him with a con, a drug addict.

You would ask why?, if he would like to be addict or con, he would be anyway? sorry, simple I wouldnt trust, what they do when we arent there. kids, especially young ones dont know the difference between bad or good that well just yet.

[game4shame]

Here is the situation - my wife has a brother who dresses like a sister. He wears makeup, has small tits but still has a penis, or so the wife thinks.

''still has a penis, or so the wife thinks''?

why don't you take him/her for a test drive.....put an end to all doubt.

[The Dan Sai Kid]

i don't think that this thread will be long for this world...

[PeaceBlondie]

Do your sons think think this guy is Uncle Noi or Aunt Noi? Have they already seen him in women's clothing? Does he affect a high pitched voice, act female, etc?

This is Thailand. Can you just tell them he's a khatoey? It's about time they learned that such people are here.

Do not be afraid that he will seduce your boys. He thinks he's a female. Would you leave them with your sister-in-law who wears dresses?

[Flysiam]

i don't think that this thread will be long for this world...

One can only hope

[BambinA]

Am I being unreasonable? homophobic? I'd quite happily leave my young daughter.

My own sister refuses to leave her son in OZ with his gay uncle, who I think is an allright bloke.

Is a Thai cross-dresser a high risk to look after young boys?

Well ,I understand what are you concerned about.

In my opinion,It depends on a person .A transexual person can be a good or bad nanny just like straight.

Anyway, you wife trust her brother who has been with her for ages old.So she thinks her brother is good enough.You will have no problem then.

Almost transexual people and gays love kid and can handle kids as good as many good straight people do.

You 'd worry if the person who takes care your kids is a drug abuse or a muderer even pedophile .

PS. If i had to take care my sister's kid, she'd worry about i spoil her future kid badly.

Edited March 19, 2007 by BambinA

[Tarragona]

Your wife doesn't seem to have a problem and probably knows him a lot better than you do. If you would trust your daughter with him, I would think your sons would be fine too.

[JimmyTheMook]

Here is the situation - my wife has a brother who dresses like a sister. He wears makeup, has small tits but still has a penis, or so the wife thinks.

A big argument is happening with the wife and me. She wants to leave our young sons at his house for a weekend when we go abroad on a business trip, and the boys want to go to because Uncle Noi has a swimming pool, pool table etc.

I have said in nooo terms am I leaving my boys(7 and 5 years old) alone with a katoy.

Am I being unreasonable? homophobic? I'd quite happily leave my young daughter.

My own sister refuses to leave her son in OZ with his gay uncle, who I think is an allright bloke.

Is a Thai cross-dresser a high risk to look after young boys?

Interested to here your opinions - however I don;t think I am going to change my mind

I would not leave them , they are to young to fend for themselves if needed.

[Ijustwannateach]

There are some straight men here who seem *terrified* of a guy who wears a dress.... they should watch more Eddie Izzard or something.

Well, it's up to them. Seems to me like OP is putting himself to a lot of inconvenience over nothing that will accomplish anything other than possibly offending the Kathoey family member and making his children more curious about him.

In later years, my parents told me that when I was younger, they had kept me from spending time with Mr. X or Mr. Y (both men I had liked as friends at the time) because they had suspicions about him and were afraid he was gay. When I found out, I simply laughed and told them both that I already WAS gay at the time (and knew it quite well)- and that Mr. Y, at least, just got married 3 years ago. Mr. X might've been gay, for all I know, but he wasn't threatening or insinuating in any way.

"S"

[seagull]

All kinds of people are capable of any crime against children. I would say you are over protective. It is good to be protective of your kids, no one can deny you that right. But he/she is your spouse's brother/sister. You decide, it's your kids.

[BambinA]

Anyway , i want to tell you one thing ..GBLT can't choose what they were born,but they can choose what they do.

We just born to be what we are..as you guys straight.

If your kids born to be straight , they will be ..(imagine then... you are a straight man , do you think anybody can change your preference?)

Being an asian people , I come from an extend family , i had to take care my boy cousins sometimes when we were young , guess what? They have been fine till now

Being a transexual is not fun , I will not force my future nieces and nephews to be that.BUT if someone born to be as they are.I will guide him/her to be a nice person in society and force them to study hard

Yes, I'm a post operation transexaul woman .

Yes ,I'm a vet doctor.

Yes, I think i'm good enough to take care a kid.. And I will never teach my future nephews to be a girl..

Edited March 19, 2007 by BambinA

[GuestHouse]

If you have EVEN THE SLIGHTEST DOUBT that your child will be safe then it is your duty as a partent to take care of your child

Trust your instincts and if they tell you not to leave your child with anyone follow your instincts.

Your child first, everyone else can cope for themselves.

[GuestHouse]

I take the view that as a parent you, I, anyone is perfectly correct to draw the line on demonstrating Political Correctness at the point of the safety and welfare of our children.

The other question is your wife's view.

On that, I say. On the balance of responsibility, your and her responsibility to the safety and welfare of your child goes beyond the responsibility to demonstrate trust in anyone else (no matter who they are - and certainly not when a child's safety and welfare is at stake).

And please, don't think this is just a sexual orientation issue.

It is no different than any child care question.

For example.

My kids will never go on a motorbike while they are under my parental control (until they reach 18). Would I let them stay with my wife's sister who scoots everywhere on a motorbike knowing full well that she regards my feelings about motorbikes in Thailand as irrational - Of course I would not.

The judgment is the same.

Edited March 19, 2007 by GuestHouse

[JimmyTheMook]

If you have EVEN THE SLIGHTEST DOUBT that your child will be safe then it is your duty as a partent to take care of your child

Trust your instincts and if they tell you not to leave your child with anyone follow your instincts.

Your child first, everyone else can cope for themselves.

Well said .

[NovaBlue05]

The Gay/Katoey issue aside, I would think that, unless you suspect him to not be responsible enough (ie: drinking, drugs..or just immature) to make sure the kids are watched after, then there shouldn't be a problem

[November Rain]

It doesn't seem like you actually fear for your kids' safety, as you say you would leave your daughter quite happily with him (her? sorry, not sure of the correct terminology). It does, therefore, seem like he is a trustworthy loving person & this is your issue rather than his (or even your sons'). I have a son & if we had a friend whom I trusted as a person & my son loved, I would let my son stay with him or her regardless of their sexual orientation or gender issues. If you feel he may have some attraction towards children, that's a whole different matter, but that doesn't seem to be the problem you're talking about, excuse me if I'm wrong.

[Queers for Fears]

absolutely ridiculous. nothing at all leaving your kids with him/her. gimme a break

[jdinasia]

I bet his family life is gonna be fun in the future (re the OP) ... already said that a family member is a bad person ... by actions if not words ...!

[Khonwan]

Here is the situation - my wife has a brother who dresses like a sister. He wears makeup, has small tits but still has a penis, or so the wife thinks.

A big argument is happening with the wife and me. She wants to leave our young sons at his house for a weekend when we go abroad on a business trip, and the boys want to go to because Uncle Noi has a swimming pool, pool table etc.

I have said in nooo terms am I leaving my boys(7 and 5 years old) alone with a katoy.

Am I being unreasonable? homophobic? I'd quite happily leave my young daughter.

My own sister refuses to leave her son in OZ with his gay uncle, who I think is an allright bloke.

Is a Thai cross-dresser a high risk to look after young boys?

Interested to here your opinions - however I don;t think I am going to change my mind

I presume you fear what your katoy in-law may do to your sons rather than how he/she may influence them. You would be entirely wrong to leave your sons (or daughters) in the care of someone whom you worried may be a paedophile but, you are entirely wrong should you assume a homosexual or transexual poses a greater risk of being a paedophile. Be just as concerned (if not more so) in leaving them in the care of your hetrosexual male (even female) friends and family members.

[meadish_sweetball]

The likelihood of you trolling right now is in the upper 90s.

But let's just say you're actually being serious: you should base your judgement on other concerns than choice of dress and sexual orientation.

It is fully possible this person is not suitable for taking care of your kids. None of us will know, especially not by reading your second hand accounts here on the forum.

Just ask yourself why you think the likelihood is larger that a transgender person would abuse your kids than somebody else.

If you have no good answer to this, then the problem lies with your non-acceptance, and not with your brister-in-law.

Does your wife love her kids? How well does she know her brother? She will have grown up with him. If (s)he really has pedophile tendencies or is violent, your wife would suspect so and not even suggest it.

[Queers for Fears]

As I said, ridiculous totally to exclude this person from caretaking based on what that person is. You are the person unfit

[mpdkorat]

I take the view that as a parent you, I, anyone is perfectly correct to draw the line on demonstrating Political Correctness at the point of the safety and welfare of our children.

The other question is your wife's view.

On that, I say. On the balance of responsibility, your and her responsibility to the safety and welfare of your child goes beyond the responsibility to demonstrate trust in anyone else (no matter who they are - and certainly not when a child's safety and welfare is at stake).

And please, don't think this is just a sexual orientation issue.

It is no different than any child care question.

For example.

My kids will never go on a motorbike while they are under my parental control (until they reach 18). Would I let them stay with my wife's sister who scoots everywhere on a motorbike knowing full well that she regards my feelings about motorbikes in Thailand as irrational - Of course I would not.

The judgment is the same.

I Totally agree with your comments, if you are unsure do not do it. Kids come first.

BTW I'm sure it would be safe to leave my son in Bambina's care.

[Jet Gorgon]

I know katoeys, and gays of both sexes. All of them adore children and would never harm them. Deviants who molest children are usually straight men with psychological problems.

[Acquiesce]

Here is the situation - my wife has a brother who dresses like a sister. He wears makeup, has small tits but still has a penis, or so the wife thinks.

A big argument is happening with the wife and me. She wants to leave our young sons at his house for a weekend when we go abroad on a business trip, and the boys want to go to because Uncle Noi has a swimming pool, pool table etc.

I have said in nooo terms am I leaving my boys(7 and 5 years old) alone with a katoy.

Am I being unreasonable? homophobic? I'd quite happily leave my young daughter.

My own sister refuses to leave her son in OZ with his gay uncle, who I think is an allright bloke.

Is a Thai cross-dresser a high risk to look after young boys?

Interested to here your opinions - however I don;t think I am going to change my mind

If posssible,leave the wife at home with the kids and you go off on business and have a blast while you have a couple of nights to yourself.

[girlx]

i agree with the person who said use your instincts with whoever you might leave your kids with. sexual orientation doesn't really mean anything. quite often it is the person whom you'd least expect who would bother your kids (catholic priests? uncle so and so?), so the best you can do is hope your feelings about each person are accurate and pay attention to them. i just read about albert fish, who was a seemingly kindly old man that many parents willingly left their kids with, and he would kill them and eat them in secret. whereas a transsexual like bambina would probably only spoil them and help open their minds.