How to avoid pooping the next day. Not a joke.

[Lacessit]

Sweet corn, okra and sai ua ( northern Thai herbal sausage ) are all natural laxatives. Consumed the previous day, guaranteed results next morning. OTOH, sticky rice bungs me up so badly I wonder if Thais here ever take a dump.

[KarenBravo]

1. Buy bottle of wine.

2. Drink wine.

3. Insert cork into anus.

4. Use empty wine bottle as hammer.

[kingofthemountain]

9 minutes ago, Rookiescot said:

Thats a nuclear option.

In the army we had in our 24 ration packs a thing called Biscuits AB. Now the AB was supposed to stand for artificial bread but we all knew what AB actually stood for and the second word was "Blocking".

Fiber is your enemy. Avoid it. But in two or three days you will pay a price for it. 

You are right here

the poop frequency is very linked to what you eat

usualy chocolate tablets, bread, sticky rice and pasta are the way

to go if you don't want to go too often to the toilet.

However a brutal change in the menu can also end in the same result

i mean a Thai used to eat rice everyday, if he stops and eat western food

during few days, his poop frequency can change aswell

If you are unable to poop during few days because of a ''blocking''

i recomand to use a random lube and your finger before to seat

you could in this way avoid to explose your a55

Edited October 4, 2020 by kingofthemountain

[NCC1701A]

[Jingthing]

10 minutes ago, scammed said:

you go to big c and buy this

https://www.google.com/search?channel=crow2&client=firefox-b-d&q=fitne+tea

and then you drink a cup of tea and wait, within 12 hours you

gonna have the dump of your life and wont even come up with the idea of taking another one for the reminder of the week

Yes I've heard of that stuff. Supposedly for weight loss but I think its probably toxic long term.

Interesting idea though. 

Unsure about the timing though.

Plan the big event for exactly when relative to the day where I want no pooping?

[Rookiescot]

7 minutes ago, KarenBravo said:

1. Buy bottle of wine.

2. Drink wine.

3. Insert cork into anus.

4. Use empty wine bottle as hammer.

Congratulations sir. You won the internet. 

[NightSky]

1 hour ago, sungod said:

Could take a plastic bag and some wet wipes with you............

..or an old shoe box and leaves.

 

You could even take a 2 liter bottle of coke, add mentos and voila...

 

you have a make shift portable bum gun..

 

 

 

Edited October 4, 2020 by NightSky

[Jingthing]

I have read to avoid fiber. Thus the white bread. I think broccoli is the worst though usually the best. I do eat a few prunes every night. Obviously stop that.

[NightSky]

Whatever the 'task' at hand, I would try to think how to accommodate natures calling one way or another even if it meant carrying a shovel with me. Bunging up seems like last resort.

 

 

[Sheryl]

2 days before, take some senna which will empty out your system the next day (the day before). On that day, eat nothing with fiber and eat smaller amountnts.

 

Then skip the coffee (or just get up much earlier and drink it & go,...which might be the simplest solution)

 

A dose of immodium also to be reall ysure

 

 

[scammed]

37 minutes ago, Jingthing said:

Yes I've heard of that stuff. Supposedly for weight loss but I think its probably toxic long term.

Interesting idea though. 

Unsure about the timing though.

Plan the big event for exactly when relative to the day where I want no pooping?

well normal is 8 hours after the cup of tea, i just added a safety margin for you, 8 hour +/- 2 hour and i dont think i can be caught lying on that statement.

the thing is the effect is that you wont be able to take a dump in the following 3 days lest you take another cup, so you can take it the day before

after dinner and can rest assured you are going to have to get up before you were supposed to and before sun gets up

Edited October 4, 2020 by scammed

[Enoon]

 

See instructions for diet and use of Picolax (or similar) prior to colonoscopy, with the morning of your expedition representing the time of the examination.

 

Normal diet starting the morning of your expedition.

 

Imodium on the day if you normally have a rapid "transit" time.

 

 

 

Edited October 4, 2020 by Enoon

[Tagged]

2 hours ago, Jingthing said:

Both or one of those?

I use both if I suspect something going on in my tummy, and Im going for travel the next day. 

 

But you have to understand, this is not good for your tummy to do just to stop pooing for a day. 

 

Read more here

https://www.drugs.com/tips/loperamide-patient-tips

 

[holy cow cm]

Hire a professional felcher?

[ChouDoufu]

2 hours ago, Jingthing said:

Is there a good way to plug things up for the day?

 

a couple options...

 

1.  go the pharma route - take a couple Norflaxin, OTC runny-butt medicine.

 

2. go organic - eat a block of mozzarella for brekkie.

[Opl]

Vollkornbrot

Rye bread, allmost immediate effect, try some days before, for early breakfast (1 large slice is sufficient)

Edited October 4, 2020 by Opl

[Jingthing]

6 minutes ago, Opl said:

Vollkornbrot

Rye bread, allmost immediate effect, try some days before, for early breakfast (1 full slice is sufficient)

I don't really get that. Isn't that high fiber? My understanding is that for my purposes for the one day, fiber is the enemy.

[Jingthing]

24 minutes ago, ChouDoufu said:

 

a couple options...

 

1.  go the pharma route - take a couple Norflaxin, OTC runny-butt medicine.

 

2. go organic - eat a block of mozzarella for brekkie.

When to take the meds? The night before?

[Jingthing]

54 minutes ago, Sheryl said:

2 days before, take some senna which will empty out your system the next day (the day before). On that day, eat nothing with fiber and eat smaller amountnts.

 

Then skip the coffee (or just get up much earlier and drink it & go,...which might be the simplest solution)

 

A dose of immodium also to be reall ysure

 

 

Wow. That's the kind of very specific advice I was looking for. Thank you. The immodium if taken to be taken when? The night before?

[Opl]

8 minutes ago, Jingthing said:

I don't really get that. Isn't that high fiber? My understanding is that for my purposes for the one day, fiber is the enemy.

I understand you don't want to use toilets for a whole day, is it?

So you need to go out for the day having everything already gone, right?

I wake up early every morning take a breakfast with a slice of rye bread, and nearly maximum 1 hour later, my diner and my breakfast are gone, and I'm freed for the rest of the day, except if I have some drinks.

Maybe it's different for each person, reason why I suggest you to try some days before 

  

Edited October 4, 2020 by Opl

[Opl]

double post deleted

Edited October 4, 2020 by Opl

[Jingthing]

32 minutes ago, Enoon said:

 

See instructions for diet and use of Picolax (or similar) prior to colonoscopy, with the morning of your expedition representing the time of the examination.

 

Normal diet starting the morning of your expedition.

 

Imodium on the day if you normally have a rapid "transit" time.

 

 

 

Preparing for a colonoscopy really seems like overkill, but thanks for posting. 

[ChouDoufu]

3 minutes ago, Jingthing said:

When to take the meds? The night before?

 

if i'm heading out and won't have access to a toilet, for example the two-hour bus ride from bangkapi to immigration, and i seem to be suffering from leakage and can't reschedule............a couple norflaxin half an hour before i head out does the trick.  of course it depends on the underlying cause of your leakage and how serious the, umm, flow.

[Jingthing]

2 minutes ago, Opl said:

I understand you don't want to use toilets for a whole day, is it?

So you need to go out for the day having everything already gone, right?

I wake up early every morning take a breakfast with a slice of rye bread, and nearly maximum 1 hour lmater, my diner and my breakfast are gone, and I'm freed for the rest of the day, except if I have some drinks.

Maybe it's different for each person, reason why I suggest you to try some days before   

OK. I get it now. Yes of course everyone is different. I did have that idea to get up super early and contrary to most of this advice do everything I can to encourage things along before needing to leave, rather than trying to block it up. 

[Opl]

6 minutes ago, Jingthing said:

Preparing for a colonoscopy really seems like overkill, but thanks for posting. 

for a colonoscopy, no fiber at all 3 days before

Edited October 4, 2020 by Opl

[Jingthing]

1 minute ago, ChouDoufu said:

 

if i'm heading out and won't have access to a toilet, for example the two-hour bus ride from bangkapi to immigration, and i seem to be suffering from leakage and can't reschedule............a couple norflaxin half an hour before i head out does the trick.  of course it depends on the underlying cause of your leakage and how serious the, umm, flow.

Yeah but this is more like 8 hours.

[ChouDoufu]

8 minutes ago, Jingthing said:

Yeah but this is more like 8 hours.

 

right.  depends on the underlying cause of the rumbly in the tumbly.  as long as i'm not spraying the walls, a couple pills will plug the dike until the symptoms clear up.  my tumbly usually settles down in an hour or so and i can pretty much forget about it.  i'll carry some more pills for use in four hours or so if needed.

 

of course this method is effective to prevent flow caused by tumbly upset.  i can't say it would be effective if you simply want to hold back the normal process.

 

in that case, cheese would likely be more effective, and should provide corkage for days depending on your tolerance and average cheese intake.

Edited October 4, 2020 by ChouDoufu

[Jingthing]

1 minute ago, ChouDoufu said:

 

right.  depends on the underlying cause of the rumbly in the tumbly.  as long as i'm not spraying the walls, a couple pills will plug the dike until the symptoms clear up.  my tumbly usually settles down in an hour or so and i can pretty much forget about it.  i'll carry some more pills for use in four hours or so if needed.

OK, but to emphasize I don't have a digestive problem. I'm trying to adjust my normal timing for one day. That's all. 

[ChouDoufu]

3 minutes ago, Jingthing said:

OK, but to emphasize I don't have a digestive problem. I'm trying to adjust my normal timing for one day. That's all. 

https://nutrineat.com/cheese-constipation

[Oliver Holzerfilled]

If you own an Apple device try this -

 

"Siri, how do I pack my poop chute?"