Australian Tourist Visa For Thai Bf

[peter991]

Background (part 1)

I first visited Thailand in 2002 and saw ‘tourist Thailand’ – Bangkok, Pattaya and Phuket. Bangkok was a nice city – but after a few days of visiting temples I was ready to move on. I fell in love with Pattaya. Phuket was a disappointment.

I planned to retire to from Australia to Thailand at the end of the June 2004. Unfortunately, a business deal I had previously arranged soured and what was to be retirement fell apart – so I had a 3 month holiday in Thailand instead.

Not a superstitious person, I had previously organised to rent a 13th floor condo in soi 13, Pattaya. One of the first places I visited was My Life Bar in Boyztown (now Oscars). I met Nop on my first night. He was a cute 19 year old. I ‘offed’ him for a few nights and then took it easy and looked around at my options – whether to buy a business in Thailand or go back to Australia and start again.

Nop told me he wanted to stop working in the bar and take up with me permanently. He invited me to meet his family. We travelled in the back of a pickup truck from Pattaya to his remote Issan village.

There was only one other farang in the village – a German who ran a restaurant and a small resort where local Thais took their mia nois for a few hours of R & R.

Issan was a major cultural shock for me. While we stayed in the resort for three nights, using a western toilet, sleeping in a double bed and luxuriating in air-conditioning – I knew that if we were to be a couple, I wanted my creature comforts.

We did sleep the last night at his parents’ place, on a bamboo bed, with a thin blanket under us and a mosquito net over us. Nop’s parents had never been more than 35km from their village and knew that their son worked in Bangkok and Pattaya – but had no idea what he did.

They readily accepted me into their family. Apart from the housing (all wood and tin), Issan food was a shock too. At that stage there were no ‘western’ food outlets in the village. The nearest place was Si Bu Riang or Chum Phae (both about 35km away). So – when in Rome (or Issan) – do as the locals do – eat local food.

Nop and I promised to keep in touch when we separated at Don Muang Airport 3 months later. I thought to myself – this is just a holiday romance – a nice one at that! But love and determination conquers all – as I was to find.

Nop and I kept in contact by phone and email. He stuck to his word not to go back working in a bar and I sent him 10,000 baht a month to tide him over.

Six months later, I was back in Thailand. Nop met me at Don Muang and it was like I had never been away. We flew to Khon Kaen (Nop’s first plane trip) then caught a taxi to his village. News that I was coming back to the village had circulated for weeks (probably for months!)

A big Issan dancing show was put on in my honour. I was given a carved teak stool to sit on … all that was missing were a few maidens with clay pots of beer on their heads!

Twelve months later we built a 3 bedroom, one bathroom house on land donated by Nop’s parents. It’s the only cement brick and tile private building in the village and certainly raised the family’s status in the village. From start to finish, including painting and tiling – the project took 3 months.

Then we bought furniture. King-sized beds and wardrobes for each of the three bedrooms. For the loungeroom, a wall-unit, TV and DVD player, kitchen table and chairs and a sofa. All teak.

Nop’s parents are not in good health, so after leaving the bar, he lived in our house and cared for his parents, particularly his mother.

Six months later – we discussed getting a 3 months’ Tourist Visa for Nop, so he could vacation in Australia. Nop already had a passport – which he had never used.

We both knew it was an uphill battle. He was a 21 year old, unemployed ex-bar boy. I would like to thank the members of the Gay People in Thailand sub-forum for their suggestions.

Our Plan (part 2)

1. Statutory Declaration, witnessed by a Justice of the Peace (JP). Basically, a letter of invitation. I invited Nop to vacation in Australia for 3 months. I stated Nop and I were in an interdependent relationship, which was ongoing after 2.5 years and I would be responsible for him while he was in Australia – by paying all his medical, legal, accommodation, meal and sight-seeing expenses

2. A letter from my local Member of Parliament, addressed to the Australian Embassy in Thailand, requesting that they grant a Tourist Visa to Nop.

3. A letter, addressed to Nop, giving a detailed itinerary of what he would be seeing in Australia. It covered a 3 month period and allowed for an average of 3 outings a week to natural and man-made attractions, mostly within a 3 hour drive of my home/workplace.

4. A letter from Nop’s mother’s doctor – stating that she was not in the best of health and Nop was the primary care-giver, with financial assistance from me.

5. A letter from Nop’s sister – that she would move into our house for 3 months to care for their mother – during Nop’s absence from Thailand.

6. Form 48R (Thai) – Application for a Tourist Visa.

7. Twenty five (25) photos of the two of us taken over 2 years. I printed the photos out on a colour ink-jet printer and had them laminated. On the back of each photo I wrote about 3 lines, giving date of photo and a brief description and location.

8. Three months of bank statements showing transfers from my savings account to Nop’s savings account. Nop also provided three Thai bank books.

9. Three months of mobile phone records, showing calls from me in Australia to Nop in Thailand.

10. Working on the principle that you can never have too much paperwork, Nop also brought along his Birth Certificate and school reports.

11. House papers – showing the house we built in his name.

Thai CC Tower (part 3)

Monday 09 April: I flew from Brisbane (Australia) to Bangkok. Met by Nop at Suvarnabhumi Airport. Spent the night in Bangkok.

Tues 10 April: Took a taxi to Thai CC Tower. Took the lift to the top floor. We both dressed neatly for the occasion. A female security guard opened the door and briefly scanned Nop’s form 48R (Thai) – before admitting us. Two minutes later, we were given a number and told to take a seat. Three minutes later our number is called. Nop was calm – I was nervous. While Nop was interviewed, I was kept busy getting photocopies of various documents – Nop’s house papers and my passport (at 3 baht a page). Ten minutes later – about 2cm of paperwork is placed inside Nop’s passport. We are told to phone a number after 1.30pm on 18 April.

Considering most government offices closed for Songkran from Thursday evening (12 April) until Wednesday morning 18 April, I was pleased with the prompt response. Spent the day in Bangkok shopping.

Wed 11 April: Flew to Khon Kaen and taxi to Nop’s village. We both knew there was probably only a 50/50 chance Nop would be granted a visa – but felt we had covered all the bases. The Australian Embassy would know the length of our relationship (2.5 years) and Nop’s reason for returning to Thailand at the end of his visa period (house and sick mother).

Thu 12 April to Wed 18 April: Friends make sure we are not bored by taking us on day trips. Finally, 1.30pm arrives. Phone the number – it’s engaged! Ten minutes later, Nop gets through and asks the big question: Did I get my Visa? Response: Your passport is ready for collection. There is a letter for you too, about your visa application. Despite prompting by me in the background, there was no way VFS was going to tell Nop whether or Nop he had been granted a visa! Something to do with the Privacy Act – or something similar. The only was we were going to find out was for Nop to travel to Bangkok. Not wanting to risk an overnight bus from Issan to Bangkok – the only option was for Nop to fly from Khon Kaen to Bangkok. No seats available today or tomorrow.

Thu 19 April: We catch the bus from the village to Chum Phae to Khon Kaen (25 baht) and connect with the Chum Phae to Khon Kaen bus (45 baht).

Fri 20 April: Nop flies business class in seat 12A from Khon Kaen to Bangkok. Phones me 1.5 hours after landing at Don Muang with the news he has a 3 month Tourist Visa. Next step is to organise a plane ticket, BKK to BNE (Brisbane) and return. Thai Airways office in Khon Kaen wants 41,620 baht ($AUD1540). The best price I can get from Flight Centre in Australia is 59,570 baht ($AUD2200. Pay Thai Airways and take possession of a piece of paper – Nop’s return ticket. There are no seats available on my Sunday morning flight from BKK to PER (Perth), so Nop is booked to fly on 24 April direct from BKK to BNE.

Sat 21 April: Dropped at Khon Kaen Airport. Ask the Thai Airways cashier if it is possible for Nop’s ticket to be changed and he could possibly fly standby BKK to PER tomorrow. Told to take him to the airport with me. Fly to Bangkok and meet Nop at 11.30pm.

Sun 22 April: Up at 4.30am. At Suvarnabhumi Airport one hour later. Check in for my flight. Nop asks about flying standby to PER on the same flight. It’s now 2 hours prior to departure. Told he will have to forfeit his BKK-BNE-BKK ticket and buy a new ticket (at full price) if he wants to go standby. Politely tell Thai Airways to ‘shove it’ and tell Nop to go back to the hotel until 24 April. I arrive in PER this afternoon – meet with my mother and children and a friend.

Mon 23 April: I fly PER-SYD and then SYD-OOL (Gold Coast Airport).

Tue 24 April: A few phone calls exchanged between Nop and me. He arrives safely at Suvarnabhumi Airport, clears Passport Control and the last I hear from him – he is on his way to Gate 86.

Wed 25 April: Arrive at Brisbane Airport 10 minutes before Nop’s Thai Airways plane lands. Wait just over an hour for him to appear. Drive back home to my home/workplace. Nop is shown around and made welcome. Dinner at local Thai Restaurant.

We have a fairly busy schedule – I am hoping he can keep his phone calls back home to a few minutes each.

Peter

[leisurely]

What a heartwarming story. Enjoy your break together.

Sincerely

Leisurely

[PeaceBlondie]

Congratulations to Peter and Nop, and best wishes on their attempts to get another, better visa soon.

[flightcrew1]

I kept reading and expecting the worse! I'm so glad that this has worked out and wish you the best! Please keep us informed. I always think that I'm better off because I date an "educated" Thai boy and always smirk to myself when I hear the "I fell in love with a bar boy story". Always expecting the worse but am truly glad this works out! Looking forward to the next part!!

[PeaceBlondie]

Since the entire ThaiVisa forum rules forbid discussions about barboys and bargirls, ("...I'had the best off last night....") let's keep that only as a side reference to the larger story of obtaining visas. However, Peter and Nod's story does show that success is possible.

I like that part about having Peter's local member of parliament write a letter; that might have impressed the folks at the Australian embassy.

[Krub]

Congratulation and good luck to both of you.

Very happy to hear of a success story both on the visa and strong relationship with an ex-bar boy

[FranklyNoMore]

I always think that I'm better off because I date an 'educated' Thai boy and always smirk to myself when I hear the;I fell in love with a bar boy story.

Yeah I always think the same as my bf is well educated too. Cant help but wonder what you talk about with a 19 year old uneducated guy. Maybe they don't talk.

It's understandable that you expect the worse with these kind of relationships because success stories, like this one, are not that common. And what about the girls and boys who get taken to their partners country only for them to leave the bf after they have gotten residency. It takes a brave and some would say stupid man to take on that kind of relationship. Anyway as long as both parties are happy then thats all that matters really. Hope it lasts!

Edited May 9, 2007 by FranklyNoMore

[Krub]

I always think that I'm better off because I date an 'educated' Thai boy and always smirk to myself when I hear the;I fell in love with a bar boy story.

Yeah I always think the same as my bf is well educated too. Cant help but wonder what you talk about with a 19 year old uneducated guy. Maybe they don't talk.

It's understandable that you expect the worse with these kind of relationships because success stories, like this one, are not that common. And what about the girls and boys who get taken to their partners country only for them to leave the bf after they have gotten residency. It takes a brave and some would say stupid man to take on that kind of relationship. Anyway as long as both parties are happy then thats all that matters really. Hope it lasts!

Uneducated humans do not talk ? Maybe don't have feelings either ? What else ?

What a horrible thing to say

[phayao]

Congratulation and good luck to both of you.

Very happy to hear of a success story both on the visa and strong relationship with an ex-bar boy

I have a pararell story to this and I can tell you that "miracles do happen". I'm married (it is legal in Spain) to my TBF (yesterday was our anniversary) after 15 years of living happily together.

The Spanish embassy in BKK didn't help at all and every step we took was like trying to climb the Everest in sandals, but we managed to fly together Bangkok-Barheim-Bucarest-Zurich-Malaga. Obviously, after three months of entering Spain he was considered an "illigal inmigrant" and could have been deported at once but we were determined and we took every precaution.

He finished College here and found a job. We go to Thailand every year to his village, where we have a big house (face is very important here, you know) and some rice fields and fruit plantations, where his family work. He built his mother a house with my design and his own money and we help economically his young nephews and nices with their education: we put two through College and sent one to Ireland for a Master.

Every holiday season in his village we are invited to every wedding (hetero), we are asked to present prizes in the local wat, we attend any funeral that occurs, we give a dinner every Sunday to the family and friends and (unfortunately for me) have at home a karaoke night almost daily.

We consider ourselves very lucky to have met: it was his first night at a gay bar and I was his first client ever.

I knew very little Thai then and he could barely speak any English at all, but we managed.

Not all "bar boys" are bad and every "falang costumer" is a pervert. There are good and bad people everywhere, wish that the "good ones" met. Chok dee krap.

[FranklyNoMore]

I always think that I'm better off because I date an 'educated' Thai boy and always smirk to myself when I hear the;I fell in love with a bar boy story.

Yeah I always think the same as my bf is well educated too. Cant help but wonder what you talk about with a 19 year old uneducated guy. Maybe they don't talk.

It's understandable that you expect the worse with these kind of relationships because success stories, like this one, are not that common. And what about the girls and boys who get taken to their partners country only for them to leave the bf after they have gotten residency. It takes a brave and some would say stupid man to take on that kind of relationship. Anyway as long as both parties are happy then thats all that matters really. Hope it lasts!

Uneducated humans do not talk ? Maybe don't have feelings either ? What else ?

What a horrible thing to say

So you jumped on the uneducated bit. I was actually wondering what one talks to a Thai 19 year old about. I'm guessing Peter991 is around 50. I'm 40 and the thought of making daily conversations with a 19 year old sounds like hel_l to me but i'm guessing peter didnt fall for his great conversation. I teach 18 year olds and most of them act like a western 13 year old.

Anyway i meant no offence and i'm sure Peter gets what he wants from his relationship otherwise it wouldnt have lasted so long.

[peter991]

There's two types of education: formal and informal. While I believe education is the future of any country - particularly in Thailand's case, I know of a lot of people who learnt a lot about life from those around them.

Nop only attended formal schooling until he was 14 years of age. The next 5 years were spent in Bangkok and Pattaya. He picked up English rapidly - along with some German. He has a photographic memory - which is sometimes not a good thing. He can recall what I said years ago.

Finding the right guy in Thailand isn't easy. I was very lucky. I will be the first to admit that. The odds were definitely stacked against me.

I am 53; Nop turns 23 in August this year. In many ways he is still a teenager - he likes reading Thai comic books, singing along to Thai songs on TV. The world for him starts and ends in Thailand.

I was afraid that he would be bored in Australia - but he has found a couple of Thai people here - so he gets to speak Thai and eat Issan food a few days a week.

We visited a local wildlife park yesterday and he got to pat and hand-feed some kangaroos.

He is a caring person - caring for me and his family.

I will keep you posted with our attempts to gain a student visa, a working visa or an interdependency visa in the near future.

Peter

[Krub]

Education is a luxury a lot of people dream of but unfortunately cannot afford as poverty forces them to take care of the next meals.

At 22 there is plenty of time for Nop to get all the education he wishes now that he and Peter have found each other.

The best of luck to both of them.

[neilrob]

There's two types of education: formal and informal. While I believe education is the future of any country - particularly in Thailand's case, I know of a lot of people who learnt a lot about life from those around them.

Nop only attended formal schooling until he was 14 years of age. The next 5 years were spent in Bangkok and Pattaya. He picked up English rapidly - along with some German. He has a photographic memory - which is sometimes not a good thing. He can recall what I said years ago.

Finding the right guy in Thailand isn't easy. I was very lucky. I will be the first to admit that. The odds were definitely stacked against me.

I am 53; Nop turns 23 in August this year. In many ways he is still a teenager - he likes reading Thai comic books, singing along to Thai songs on TV. The world for him starts and ends in Thailand.

I was afraid that he would be bored in Australia - but he has found a couple of Thai people here - so he gets to speak Thai and eat Issan food a few days a week.

We visited a local wildlife park yesterday and he got to pat and hand-feed some kangaroos.

He is a caring person - caring for me and his family.

I will keep you posted with our attempts to gain a student visa, a working visa or an interdependency visa in the near future.

Peter

When I first visited a bar in Thailand, I expected all the people there to be rather hardened and very commercial. I continue to be very pleasantly surprised over the years as to the number of nice (in all senses of the word) boys there are in commercial establishments. It sounds like you were lucky enough to meet one of the nicest.

Thanks for the heartwarming story.

Neil

[dukkha]

Great news Peter although I already was aware of the good news...maybe some day I will

take the step with Sam..and to a previous poster, after two years since I met my partner in Balcony

Bar I can only say that one should not make sweeping generalisations about thai men in regard

to motives/ agendas etc...I continue to remain happy with Sam and bless ( pardon the ecclesial reference )..

the moment that we met purely accidently...it took me a good 5 years living here to understand trust

and all the sad sagas that I had heard about thai and farang relationships..in fact I started a thread not

long after meeting Samran about this very subject entitled..farang men who have healthy relationships

with thai men, as so much of what I read on this forum was oppressively negative..it had a wonderful

response and was so happy to read of farang men who had met and formed relationships with thai men

without all the crap that seemed to pervade so many of these discussions..and as Sam and I enter our

third year together I am not in the least disheartened by what has occured...and at 59 I had given

up all hope of something of this nature ever occuring...so best wishes for Peter and Nop and for all

of those men who are in relationships with a cross cultural element...it IS possible, and it IS real...

dont listen to those who find it neccessary to tear such partnerships apart...you come to a culture which

is not your own...deal with it!!...Dukkha