Definitions...

[Lucifer]

Few CLASSIC Definitions

* School: A place where Papa pays and Son plays.

* Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that

you can die Rich.

* Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.

* Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree

and a woman gains her masters

* Divorce: Future tense of Marriage.

* Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by

feminine waterpower.

* Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the

Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of

either"

* Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

* Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody

believes he got the biggest piece.

* Dictionary : A place where success comes before work.

* Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and

everybody disagrees later on.

* Father: A banker provided by nature.

* Criminal: A guy no different from the rest....except that he got

caught.

* Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are

early.

* Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your

Confidence after.

* Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.

* Classic: Books, which people praise, but do not read.

* Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

* Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

* Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

* Etc.: A sign to m ake others believe that you know more than you

actually do.

* Committee : Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to

decide that nothing can be done together.

* Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.

* Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.

* Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead