They Say You Should Never

[tijnebijn]

My computer bounces , anyone ?

[Ping]

I have heard that sometimes cheques bounce - or is that Czechs? Generally computers are cast to Davy Jones' locker because they have reached the end of their useful life on the desktop and are then eminently suitable as achors for small boats. Of course, in LZ's case, it was a laptop that went overboard, courtesy of a brown dog off its chain. So, does household insurance cover the loss? Probably, not, or LZ would have mentioned it. But is there more to this tale of woe than meets the eye?

I think the truth is that the dog - being a domestic pet - was probably well trained. LZ has been looking to buy one of those super new laptops with the 8800 graphics card, so that he can get more oomph from his vid games. He knows that his missus would be dark on him wanting to shell out over $5000 (B150,000) on a new laptop when 'You already have a perfectly good one, dear'. So he trains up the dog to do his bidding while there are plenty of witnesses present. On cue, the dog spills the 'puter into the pond and LZ, of course, feigns great anguish and despair. So his missus, in trying to console him, says 'Never mind dear, it's not all that important, is it? You just go and get yourself a nice new one and try not to worry.'

In a flash, Lazeeboy is seen running to the car, rubbing his hands together and performing the maniacal laugh of a comic book arch-villain, and off down to the local 'Laptops-R-Us'.

Is that how it goes, LZ?

[gampaan]

I have heard that sometimes cheques bounce - or is that Czechs? Generally computers are cast to Davy Jones' locker because they have reached the end of their useful life on the desktop and are then eminently suitable as achors for small boats. Of course, in LZ's case, it was a laptop that went overboard, courtesy of a brown dog off its chain. So, does household insurance cover the loss? Probably, not, or LZ would have mentioned it. But is there more to this tale of woe than meets the eye?

I think the truth is that the dog - being a domestic pet - was probably well trained. LZ has been looking to buy one of those super new laptops with the 8800 graphics card, so that he can get more oomph from his vid games. He knows that his missus would be dark on him wanting to shell out over $5000 (B150,000) on a new laptop when 'You already have a perfectly good one, dear'. So he trains up the dog to do his bidding while there are plenty of witnesses present. On cue, the dog spills the 'puter into the pond and LZ, of course, feigns great anguish and despair. So his missus, in trying to console him, says 'Never mind dear, it's not all that important, is it? You just go and get yourself a nice new one and try not to worry.'

In a flash, Lazeeboy is seen running to the car, rubbing his hands together and performing the maniacal laugh of a comic book arch-villain, and off down to the local 'Laptops-R-Us'.

Is that how it goes, LZ?

Sounds good to me, don't you think??

[AlexLah]

It is a far more realistic scenario for sure, and thanks for typing that down dear beloved TV member Ping.

As LB has not reacted for a few days it is indeed a telltale sign.

Obviously he has been installing all latest available games and is laughing his balls off while playing.

For the first time in his life he pulled a scam, and even better on his own partner....

How does that feel LB, hmmmmm?

[gampaan]

Could it be he has been replaced, not just his puter, but his person as well?

It may take some time to acclimate his clone to life on TV, ya think?

[AlexLah]

From inside source.

LB has been submitted.

We just need to wait.

Any other question?

[tijnebijn]

To my shock I saw am spam member spamming all our beloved

threads in the pub forum .

To my delight I saw everything being deleted my a mod .

Anyone saw this as well ?

What is the fun of the spammers trolls anyway ?

[AlexLah]

Huh?

No understand, Mai kho chai

Bo hoe jack

Mai roe

[tijnebijn]

many sexual links and whatever more don't know .

kinkyangelina was the members name ......

whatever more we can say ?

Kho chai riang ?

[AlexLah]

Could it be this one?

http://perfspot.com/profile.asp?uid=21BF5D...D0-747512F8810D

[tijnebijn]

would be most welcome wouldn't she ?

[lazeeboy]

why oh why do i drink

[AlexLah]

Drink what?

Apple cider is the way to go nowadays, no?

[Ping]

why oh why do i drink

Sounds like Lazeeboy has created a moment in minor history; the Battle of the Bottomless Bottle. After an exhausting engagement lasting the good part of a whole night, Lazeeboy finally got to the end of the bottle and retired in elated, though hazy, victory; or so he thought. For it was a victory to be won by stealth, not tactics, because on the following morning, howitzers were bombarding his brain and the Aspirin Reserve needed to be called upon for a final counter-offensive. But this was one of many ongoing campaigns for final victory over the dreaded axis powers of beer, wine and whisky. Who will be the victor in the next campaign?

[AlexLah]

Dear beloved and well respected TV member Ping.

Have you ever considered becoming a writer?

[lazeeboy]

doubt he would sell many ,as for a hangover its was'nt that bad ,so i'll do it again tonight ,how bout you

[AlexLah]

Yes absolutely.

I have here two botlles of water, icecold.

Wots you drinking?

[Ping]

doubt he would sell many

Lazeeboy - I wasn't out of line with the story of how you got your new 'puter, was I?

[Ping]

Dear beloved and well respected TV member Ping.

Have you ever considered becoming a writer?

Ah, you're a fine fellow Alex; obviously a connoisseur of the arts. Have you given thought to writing as a critic for a profession?

[AlexLah]

Aaaaai haf look you wfrite and look and yes is OK and I think you know.

Now I fink is OK and also.

Naaaaaaaaaa is no good but OK and want to .

Zzjes is all good and I look and yes.

Doo you undstansd?

Haaaaa haaaaa

Huuhhhh eeerrrrrgh huuuhhhhh uuuuurhhhh

Go toilet

Uuuuurrrrrrghhhh uuuughhhh...... urrgghhh, blaaaaaaaarghhhh uh uh

I am feel sick.

I go zleeps...

Anyone hafe some pilz?

[gampaan]

doubt he would sell many ,as for a hangover its was'nt that bad ,so i'll do it again tonight ,how bout you

Absolutely...that's the 'ol spirit lazee, never say die.

Now where did I put that Jim Beam.....

[AlexLah]

Razy booy have you been to the the the the street?

Not know about anything but you know ha ha haaaaaaaaaa.

Pouring in another JB (50-50).

Letz go to the Tunnel, ma ny people there and have fun.

Iz just fun and wait for more fun and have some lady pour drink and have fun.

Yeeeeezzzzz iz fun and take anotherz drinkz and have funz

I feel sick I think I have to go toiltez

You knowz you have to go na

Take lazy and go

Za no zink and have

ZZZZZ

You z now

HaAAA HAA

Iz not zame , zzzzzzzzzzzzzrrrrr

OK I have to end wiz questionz

Waz is it that atracted you to go to Thailndz?

[AlexLah]

Ok Lah, sorry for previous post.

I was trying to follow LB.

Consuming large amounts of alcoholic fluids.

It only makes you speak very bad and not understandable.

Apple cider is the way to go and the latest trend as they told me so I will stick with that.

What was the question?

Sorry I am getting old.....

[gampaan]

I think the question was, how does she DO that ?? ...

[lazeeboy]

has somebody lost the plot here

[Ping]

Yes, me. Well, not that I've lost it, I just can't seem to follow it. As Pauline Hanson would say, 'Please explain?'.

[AlexLah]

1586 postings and we are not anything near to an answer.

I suggest we implement some strong meassures and get on with it.

Do you agree?

[Zpete]

I am lost, me mother crapped on me.........oops motherboard.

Bought meself a new laptop, WHEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Everything is now instant.

THE PLOT.....

Wot?

Other than Alex's mind wanderings......

Has there ever been one?

[AlexLah]

Did your old puttie bounced in the pool as well?

We heard that one before here, haaaa haaaaa haaaaaaaaa haaaaaaa haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

haaaa haaaaa haaaaaaaaa haaaaaaa haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! haaaa haaaaa, haaaa haaaaa haaaaaaaaa haaaaaaa haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! haaaaaaaaa haaaaaaa haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! haaaa haaaaa, haaaaaaaaa haaaaaaa, haaaa haaaaa haaaaaaaaa haaaaaaa haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

I think it is time for a new page, a new start so to speak and I would like to take the opportunity to take you there.

Some of us have been wondering around searching for the true meaning of life, the reason for existance in this world that makes no sense for most of us.

Life is a lesson as they say but where can we find "The Teacher"

Let me explain to you with the following story......

Once upon a time there where the Gods of the water, the mountains, trees anything visible for the human eye had a god named and they were worshipped by many.

All the Gods then came together and decided there must be created a God of Gods, sort of an ultimate God.

All agreed but one God posed a question: " Where to hide this ultimate God, as we do not want those humans to find it, right"

Well one God answered let us put it in the deepest ocean, humans will never get there.

One day they will another God answered, let us put it on the highest mountain he said.

No no no no, another God said, one day humans will reach the highest mountain and then we are really fukced.

Realising that there was no place on earth that could not be seen by humans another God said:

Let us hide this ultimate God inside the humans, they will never look there.

This information has been kept a secret by all religions, but I am here to disclose this all to people that are willing to understand and discover.

As I have mentioned "The Program" before, and few of you thought it was part of some kind of brainwashing program I tell you it is not.

The path to enlightment is long and steep as " The organisation" needs to de-program everything you have been told was real.

After you have been "Erased" as we call it, you will be ready to find the real truth and nothing but(t).

A new world will manifest itself in front of you, colors never seen, feelings never felt, a total change of mind and perception.

Are you ready to make that change?

[Zpete]

Elucidate, please,