How Do You Keep Your Resolve?

[eek]

-snip-

Whereas here in LOS, I find the attitude is far more refreshing, very rarely does anybody question me and because my partner also doesn't drink, it makes it easier for me as we do not frequent the bar/pub scene very often.

-snip-

I agree that I have rarely had any Thai be surprised or shocked if i say i dont drink and that feels good. In the UK it was a "go on have a drink!" type attitude. People make you feel like a party pooper for not having a drink with them. One time a girl that I worked with even became pretty nasty about it because she wanted a drinking buddy.

In Thailand i kind of holed myself up a bit initially. Well, actually, i still do, but less so. Part of the reason i came here is to have time for myself, without pressures from family and friends. I suppose i should tackle being able to hang out at night time socially without the heavy feeling i get. I actually feel quite ill at the thought of it. Ive been invited out many times, but the idea of hanging out in a bar is hard for me to handle. The smell of alcohol and the smell of it on peoples breath is hard for me also. The one time i went out with a group of westerners we ended up in a bar after dinner. I felt really uncomfortable. Its not the bar, because i didnt hang out drinking in bars, its the smell. I also feel less socially easy-going as i used to when i drank. Its weird but part of it is that i sometimes feel that im not quite sure who i am anymore..and im still finding that out. Hard to interact with others when im still finding my feet. Feel a bit vulnerable bearing this on the forum, but there you are. Might ring some bells for others, and if it helps then im glad.

[philo]

Thanks to both of you.

The psychiatrist at RAM was the man who took me through detox and is a man as good as they come. I will trust him with my life and I am sure he will help me sort out possibilities for psychological counseling in CM. Also I will reread the old threads in the 'Health, Body and Medicine' forum.

One step at the time ...

[eek]

One step at the time ...

Exactly.

[gerryBScot]

Well done Eek and well done Philo, well done anyone who has not had a drink today. Eek I stopped and started for 30 years, no real significant period of abstinence, days, maybe a couple of weeks, and then for some silly reason i'd go out and have a few drinks. usually nothing too silly to begin with but eventually I would end up on a major bender, blitzkrieg drinking. I had been dry for 30 days or so when I went to my first AA meeting, over 5 years ago, haven't drunk since. Don't miss it, don't want it, don't need it. Better without it in every sense of the word. I didn't give anything up, rather I got back stuff. Life immeasurably better, married, a new born kid, working here. I still go to AA. It is the only thing that has kept me sober. There are some new meetings in Chiang Mai which might be worth checking out but I tell you if you feel like having a drink any AA meeting will be better for you than a saloon. Go in and tell them your story, it will be good for them to hear and as well as helping you it might help someone else. Good luck!

[eek]

Don't miss it, don't want it, don't need it. Better without it in every sense of the word. I didn't give anything up, rather I got back stuff.

Fantastic!

Actually, this was (and sometimes still is) part of the problem for me. I kept thinking i gave something good up. I conveniently left out all the negative aspects and focused on thinking that i was so much more confident and more likeable when i was drinking, or at least less likely to care if others thought negatively of me. I liked the numbness. Learning to deal with a real un-numbed reality has been the hardest part for me. Getting sober sort of felt like i woke up one day and i was a grown woman and wondered who the hel_l i was. Getting to know myself may sound cliched and lame, but thats what ive had to do..and yes, it is getting something back. Its getting back reality and living life ...as scary as that sometimes seems.

[eek]

..Last night I found myself going along to a nightclub with some friends for the first time in many years (and that last time i was still drinking). I drank an orange, but for some reason i got into my head that it had alcohol in it. I couldnt shake off that feeling and ended up leaving. Was a really odd sensation. As crazy as this sounds ive been unable to sleep all night because of different thoughts buzzing through my head. I just couldnt settle and felt nauseated. Has anyone had any kind of strange similar feeling when out like that???

[eek]

im not sure if sharing this is of benefit to anyone (dont want to be taking over this thread either)..but at 6am after a night of not sleeping i went out on my bike to the local park and ran myself stupid. An hour later and physically worn out, i feel good. Actually,even though im worn out, i feel like running more. I recall becoming a overly addicted to exercise when i first stopped drinking, but i do know it helps. I read somewhere else on this forum about exercise and meditation, and i know that combination is what works for me.

Anyway..um..thats all really.

Oh ..and also a very nice pm from a member helped a lot when i got back in too.

[StreetCowboy]

im not sure if sharing this is of benefit to anyone (dont want to be taking over this thread either)..but at 6am after a night of not sleeping i went out on my bike to the local park and ran myself stupid. An hour later and physically worn out, i feel good. Actually,even though im worn out, i feel like running more. I recall becoming a overly addicted to exercise when i first stopped drinking, but i do know it helps. I read somewhere else on this forum about exercise and meditation, and i know that combination is what works for me.

Anyway..um..thats all really.

Oh ..and also a very nice pm from a member helped a lot when i got back in too.

Having friends and aquaintances that don't drink makes a big difference; and seeing that you can be teetotal without being a Salvation Army stormtrooper...

Realising that I don't particularly want to drink sensibly anyway, even if I could...

SC

[Neeranam]

HI i can see that some of you are struggling so i thought i would put my 2 pennies worth ln. 12 years ago my life was a complete mess due to many years of alcohol and drug abuse and if i didnt do somthing, i would either be dead or end up in prison for a very long time and i decided that i had HAD ENOUGH!!! I had been to few aa meetings in the past and instead of listening to the similarities, i listened to the differances and went away thinking , well, none of what some those aa people have said has happened to me,so i am not an alcoholic and anyway, those aa people are some kind of cult, so i carried on drinking for about another 5 years. Things got worse and worse. Eventually i thought, ive HAD ENOUGH of all this sh-t ,I NEED HELP, so i went into rehab and started to WORK THE TWELVE STEP PROGRAM.At first it was very painful and people were telling me, alcohol and drugs are just a symptom of this illness and i needed to address what was going on deepdown and i need to work this program so that it becomes part of me. They also said if i did what was suggested , i would very slowly get better. Guess wot!! they were right!!!and its the best thing i ever did. About a year after leaving rehab they offered me a job and for the last 11 years i have been giving back to others what was freely given to me. My life today is good, i have ups and downs like anyone else, but i use THE TWELVE STEPS to deal with any problems that come up. So i say to you HAVE YOU HAD ENOUGH AND ARE YOU WILLING TO GO TO ANY LENGTHS TO GET SOBER???? and when i say sober, i dont just mean stop drinking, i mean STOP DRINKING AND HAVE A HAPPY CONTENTED LIFE!!! also its not just meetings that keep you sober ITS WHAT YOU DO IN BETWEEN!!! I have not had an urge to drink for twelve years a day at time and if it can work for me, it will work for you. thanks

If I had replied to this thread, the above is almost exactly what I'd have written, except 9 years sober.

[ding]

HI i can see that some of you are struggling so i thought i would put my 2 pennies worth ln. 12 years ago my life was a complete mess due to many years of alcohol and drug abuse and if i didnt do somthing, i would either be dead or end up in prison for a very long time and i decided that i had HAD ENOUGH!!! I had been to few aa meetings in the past and instead of listening to the similarities, i listened to the differances and went away thinking , well, none of what some those aa people have said has happened to me,so i am not an alcoholic and anyway, those aa people are some kind of cult, so i carried on drinking for about another 5 years. Things got worse and worse. Eventually i thought, ive HAD ENOUGH of all this sh-t ,I NEED HELP, so i went into rehab and started to WORK THE TWELVE STEP PROGRAM.At first it was very painful and people were telling me, alcohol and drugs are just a symptom of this illness and i needed to address what was going on deepdown and i need to work this program so that it becomes part of me. They also said if i did what was suggested , i would very slowly get better. Guess wot!! they were right!!!and its the best thing i ever did. About a year after leaving rehab they offered me a job and for the last 11 years i have been giving back to others what was freely given to me. My life today is good, i have ups and downs like anyone else, but i use THE TWELVE STEPS to deal with any problems that come up. So i say to you HAVE YOU HAD ENOUGH AND ARE YOU WILLING TO GO TO ANY LENGTHS TO GET SOBER???? and when i say sober, i dont just mean stop drinking, i mean STOP DRINKING AND HAVE A HAPPY CONTENTED LIFE!!! also its not just meetings that keep you sober ITS WHAT YOU DO IN BETWEEN!!! I have not had an urge to drink for twelve years a day at time and if it can work for me, it will work for you. thanks

If I had replied to this thread, the above is almost exactly what I'd have written, except 9 years sober.

May I pile on as well? Maybe without the caps, tho. 25 years this month and still need you guys and gals as much today as I did in 1985! Thanks folks.

[whiterussian]

One month and counting.

One month of jogging, dieting, vitamins.

One month of sleepless nights and unproductive days. mulling over all the things I blotted out with a bottle.

It will be worth it! - It has to be!

Never drank much in the UK.

4 years here and I've hardly had a dry day, it just crept up on me, until my tolerance built up, and up... I put it down to my Russian genes and 6'2" build. Poor excuse.

When my liver started to ache after a drinking session, it was a rude reminder.

I really hope that I have it under control now, I gave up 5 years of Ganga abuse at the age of 21 in about a month, my body just rejects it ever since. I've never missed it in 15 years. I hope this addiction will end the same way.

Good luck guys n gals.

Edited March 28, 2010 by whiterussian

[StreetCowboy]

One month and counting.

One month of jogging, dieting, vitamins.

One month of sleepless nights and unproductive days. mulling over all the things I blotted out with a bottle.

It will be worth it! - It has to be!

Never drank much in the UK.

4 years here and I've hardly had a dry day, it just crept up on me, until my tolerance built up, and up... I put it down to my Russian genes and 6'2" build. Poor excuse.

When my liver started to ache after a drinking session, it was a rude reminder.

I really hope that I have it under control now, I gave up 5 years of Ganga abuse at the age of 21 in about a month, my body just rejects it ever since. I've never missed it in 15 years. I hope this addiction will end the same way.

Good luck guys n gals.

Well done!

My days are never more productive when I have a hang-over, and I'm not really sure that I ever slept that well when I was unconscious either

SC

[cognos]

I'm 6 months on April 2 without beer and pot..I thought it would be hard, but there have been no urges. My wife told me on the last day that if she could get a plane back to Thailand she would leave that night. That was the stimulus for me to do what I had wanted to do for years. It scared me straight, and I won't look back. I have partied a couple times in my dreams, and I did not like the feeling even in the dream.. however I usually stay straight even in the dreams, knowing I have quit by choice.

straight and sober is the best