"Regrets" versus "best thing I ever did".

[geo473]

Been quite a journey 😁 

 

Every decision or happening to instigate change has resulted in another interesting chapter:

 

There are many........

 

I guess that's an acceptable level of success in life

 

Here I am deep in Isaan 

 

Still a great deal to learn, and much enjoyment to be garnered 

 

Just lucky I guess 😁 

[GinBoy2]

4 hours ago, Hummin said:

It is part of the experience making you a better human being! There is a time to evaluate and there is a time to grow on your experiences. Seems it ended good, so time to let go of bad feelings involved in your past. 

Well you may well be right.

 

I am most definitely a better man than I was back then.

 

Life experiences and family calm you down a lot.

 

I don't think I will ever let go of some of the regret I have for my life choices, but in some ways having that regret in the back of my head I think has made me a better man and Dad.

 

Once you understand regret you realize what you can lose, and thats a good lesson to learn for anyone

[sidjameson]

Humans tend to make themselves the heros of their own narrative.

[georgegeorgia]

On 8/1/2024 at 5:29 PM, newnative said:

     I spent my career working in a community college library.  Liked my job and my co-workers, and the mix of students.  If given a do-over, I might choose a career in interior design, instead.  But, I've sort of had a second career doing just that after my retirement in my early 50s and it has been very satisfying.  

     One of the best things I ever did was buying my first condo in my 30s, after too many years of renting.  Certainly, it was the smartest thing I ever did.  I would be in semi-deep kimchi right about now had I rented all my life.

     

Must of paid well being a Librarian if you retired in your early 50's !!!

 

I would love to be a librarian and read books all day 

[GinBoy2]

11 hours ago, sidjameson said:

Humans tend to make themselves the heros of their own narrative.

If that was aimed at me, get over yourself.

 

There are very few hero's in this world, but the ability to admit mistakes regret and learn from them does make you a better person but most certainly not a hero..

 

If you have no regrets in your life you are either one of the rarest humans on the planet, or just totally a delusional narcissist

[susanlea]

1 hour ago, GinBoy2 said:

If that was aimed at me, get over yourself.

 

There are very few hero's in this world, but the ability to admit mistakes regret and learn from them does make you a better person but most certainly not a hero..

 

If you have no regrets in your life you are either one of the rarest humans on the planet, or just totally a delusional narcissist

I disagree. Accepting the past means not regretting it. Regretting the past means you are not living in the present. We all make a 100 mistakes but regret achieves nothing. Happiness only comes from living the present day.

[NowNow]

3 hours ago, GinBoy2 said:

If that was aimed at me, get over yourself.

 

There are very few hero's in this world, but the ability to admit mistakes regret and learn from them does make you a better person but most certainly not a hero..

 

If you have no regrets in your life you are either one of the rarest humans on the planet, or just totally a delusional narcissist

 

That was a weird rant...do you think that you'll regret embarrassing yourself in such a manner? Why would you think it was 'aimed at you' in particular?

[NowNow]

On 8/1/2024 at 9:19 PM, GinBoy2 said:

It's sort of weird.

 

Of course I'm happy how everything has worked out, kids are happy, grandkids and all of us are OK in our lives.

 

But you can't help thinking about that trauma that happened back in the day

 

In introspection I have had this conversation with my wife ex wife, and woman generally have a clearer mind than men.

 

Men I 'think' can tend to be bitter when thing go badly

 

Women will in general walk away. 

 

Not making any judgments but thats what I see

 

Odd...so you think William Congreve got it wrong?

"Heav'n has no Rage, like Love to Hatred turn'd, Nor Hell a Fury, like a Woman scorn'd." (Act III, Scene 2).................. William Congreve (24 January 1670 – 19 January 1729)

[newnative]

5 hours ago, georgegeorgia said:

Must of paid well being a Librarian if you retired in your early 50's !!!

 

I would love to be a librarian and read books all day 

     Poorly paid, actually.  State job.  But, you could retire with a pension once you reached 30 years of service, which I did at age 53.  Virginia had a rather innovative pension option at the time, which I used, where you could opt for a larger pension in your first years of retirement, which reduced somewhat once you qualified for Social Security.  But, you still got COLAs every year, so the pension was increasing each year.

    I worked another 5 years part-time at the same job to supplement the pension, while also flipping condos, then moved to Thailand.  Took Social Security early, at age 62, which some say not to do, but, in my case, I think it was the best option and absolutely no regrets on that.   The library job involved a lot of different duties, none of which was to 'read books all day'.  And, thank goodness--even though I like to read, that would soon get boring.

[BritManToo]

16 hours ago, GinBoy2 said:

Well you may well be right.

 

I am most definitely a better man than I was back then.

 

Life experiences and family calm you down a lot.

 

I don't think I will ever let go of some of the regret I have for my life choices, but in some ways having that regret in the back of my head I think has made me a better man and Dad.

 

Once you understand regret you realize what you can lose, and thats a good lesson to learn for anyone

And I'm a worse person now having realised being nice gets you nothing.

I regret caring about other people when I was younger.

 

But now I realise nothing really matters ........ except, me, me, me, me, me!

[ArnieP]

13 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

And I'm a worse person now having realised being nice gets you nothing.

I regret caring about other people when I was younger.

 

But now I realise nothing really matters ........ except, me, me, me, me, me!

Alan Price’s “The Jarrow Song” in the 1970s included, 

 

“My name is little Alan Price, I tried to be nice all all of my life but I’m afraid that up to date it doesn’t work”.

 

Only too true, sadly.

[MalcolmB]

I regret not moving here 20 years earlier.

The longer I am here the more I realize how many years I wasted in the UK at the pub surrounded by whining negative people and fat women.

[jas007]

I’m not sure what I was thinking when I was 20 years old. My time horizon wasn’t that large. I was in college and trying to have as much fun as possible. I figured the future would just work itself out.

 

Fast forward 50+ years and I still don’t know what I want to do when I grow up.

 

Regrets?  I don’t waste much time thinking about what could have been.  It happened, I made those choices, and I couldn’t go back and change anything, even if I wanted to.

 

As for the best thing I ever did?  I can’t identify any one thing, but some of the best decisions I ever made came from stepping outside of the so-called comfort zone.  Quitting a job, for example.  Or retiring early.  I’m sure some people thought I was nuts, but so what?  I’ll take time over money, any day.