Gabriel went to the Lord and said, "I have to talk to you. We have some

Texans up here who are causing problems... They're swinging on the Pearly

Gates, my horn is missing, and they are wearing T-shirts instead of their

robes; there's barbecue sauce and picante sauce all over everything,

especially their T-shirts; their dogs are riding in the chariots and chasing

the sheep; they are wearing baseball caps and cowboy hats instead of their

halos. They refuse to keep the stairway to Heaven clean, and their boots

are marking and scuffing up the halls of Wisdom. There are watermelon seeds

and tortilla chip crumbs all over the place. Some of them are walking

around with just one wing; and they insist on bringing their horses with

them."

The Lord said, "Texans are Texans, Gabriel. Heaven is home to all of my

children. If you want to know about real problems, call the Devil."

So Gabriel calls the Devil who answers the phone and says, "Hello---hold on

a minute." When he returns to the phone the Devil says, "O.K., I'm back.

What can I do for you? "

Gabriel replied, "I just want to know what kind of problems you re having

down there with the Texans."

The Devil said, "Hold on again. I need to check on something."

After about 5 minutes the Devil returned to the phone and said. "I'm back.

Now what was the question?"

Gabriel said, "What kind of problems are you having down there with the

Texans?"

The Devil said, "Man, I don't believe this...hold on." This time the Devil

was gone 15 minutes and when he returns he says, "I'm sorry Gabriel, I can't

talk right now. Those Texans have put out the fire and are trying to install

air conditioning. .