Throughout history there have been many interesting people who have had a profound effect. Some have shaped nations, some have been interesting to just ourself.

Milliways Restaurant At The End Of The Universe has opened a new branch in Bedlam and you are all invited. You can reserve your table for the People of History Dinner on this thread.

Please note there are certain restrictions and "rules"

1) You may choose any number of guests ranging from one person for that special "tet a tet" dinner in the candlelight corner up to the buffet table with 11 other guests (total 12 patrons including yourself - 13 is unlucky and 14 is likely to get the universe out of wack)

2) We will issue each guest a babel fish to stick in their aural orifice allowing immediate communication irrespective of language spoken.

3) A galactic protection shield will be imposed in case you wish to invite mortal enemies. Note: Milliways reserve the right to impose additional screening procedures for preventing guests inadvertently bringing in weapons of mass or singular distruction.

4) Only historical figues can be invited. However because of the nature of the time/space equation if the person is "real" in your mind or belief structure then that person will attend. This is a wormhole in the fabric of space to allow believers to invite their favourite diety and to prevent non believers from inviting the same God and then when God doesn't come, say "see this is proof that God doesn't exist"

4) Cartoon characters or weird stuff from your own imagination may be invited but the management reserves the right to ignore them unless it thinks it would be really cool to have "The Green Lantern" sit next to the Buddha.

5) Lastly you will need to determine the seating plan. Each invitee will be seated acording to the sequence you post. The tables are usually rectangular and the number will be arranged in a clockwise (universal standard) direction. Please be aware of where each person is sitting and remember it may not be such a good idea to put some people next to or opposite others.

6) LAST and most important - you must include youself in the guest list else your party will meet without you. You should decide where in the seating order you wish to sit. Failure to do this will result in your party meeting without you, having a fabulous meal and Milliways' sending you the bill.

Enjoy.

CB (coordinator for the Milliways Bedlam Restaurant)

2 questions to be presented to the management, please -

by "historical" do you mean dead? Can anyone be living?

Do we have to give reasons for our choices?

Thanking you in advance.

2 questions to be presented to the management, please -

by "historical" do you mean dead? Can anyone be living?

The guest may be living or dead.

Do we have to give reasons for our choices?

You may give reasons if you are so inclined but they are not required. It is your dinner party and you don't have to justify the reason for the invitation. You may find however that others may be interested in your choice but you are not required to explain or justify the choice.

Thanking you in advance.

Thankyou for your enquiry. I hope this has answered your questions and we look forward to your dinner list.

CB

ADDITIONAL INFORMATION

Because of the nature of quantum physics it is possible for more than one of our members to invite the same guest at the same time however it is messy to invite the same person twice to your own party. The same person can happily occupy space at two different tables at the same time, but may implode if they both sit at the same table.

CB

Boadicea ---------------Ernest Hemingway

Bob Marley ------------ Oliver Reed

Myself ----------------- Jesus (water into wine may come in handy)

Richard Branson ----- Dr Stephen Hawking

Gandhi------------------ Leonardo Da Vinci

Albert Einstein -------- Dean Martin

Dean Martin, Ollie Reed and Ernest Hemingway will always prove to be a handful but will certainly make for a good night out. Plus Jesus, Gandhi and Bob Marley should be able to quell any uprisings should things take a turn for the worse. Perhaps Jesus would be kind enough to show us all a party trick and heal Dr Stephen who would then be able to celebrate the night in style sharing intellectual discourse on all manner of subjects with great music and plenty of booze.

(good thread!)

Boadicea ---------------Ernest Hemingway

Bob Marley ------------ Oliver Reed

Myself ----------------- Jesus (water into wine may come in handy)

Richard Branson ----- Dr Stephen Hawking

Gandhi------------------ Leonardo Da Vinci

Albert Einstein -------- Dean Martin

Dean Martin, Ollie Reed and Ernest Hemingway will always prove to be a handful but will certainly make for a good night out. Plus Jesus, Gandhi and Bob Marley should be able to quell any uprisings should things take a turn for the worse. Perhaps Jesus would be kind enough to show us all a party trick and heal Dr Stephen who would then be able to celebrate the night in style sharing intellectual discourse on all manner of subjects with great music and plenty of booze.

(good thread!)

excellent reply quiksilva and I noticed you placed yourself opposite Jesus were the wine will be. Some interesting pairings but a very male dominated group only tempered by Boadicea. Mind you she can take care of herself.

Your reservation for 12 has been placed and we at Milliways are happy to have you join us for dinner.

CB

George Bush, Mike Tyson & Michael Moore.

&

On another private booth with some good wine, a mirror & a credit card, Kurt Kobain, Carl Cox, Beyonce & Elle McPherson when she was a teenager, along with myself of course.

The Buddha (Siddharta Gotama)----Myself

Jesus Christ ------------- Mary Magdelene

Mohhamed ------------- Osama Bin Laden

JFK (assassinated one)-------- Lee Harvey Oswald

Linda Lovelace ------------ John Holmes

Carl Jung ------------ Don Juan D'marco

Crowboy ------------ McGriffith (To check everyone has their nametag)

The Buddha Gotama......Rodney Dangerfiled

Gandhi...........Oscar Wilde

Charles Darwin.....Voltaire

Thomas Jefferson......Churchill

circa 1960 Gina Lollobrigida....myself.

Hopefully the guests will be stimulated and engaged enough to take no notice as Gina and I slip out the side door to a waiting car.

Edit: I gave Voltaire Jesus's seat as he never RSVP'd.

In no particular order :-

Roy Batty... so he can tell us what happened at the Tannhauser Gate

Samwise Gamgee... after a few drinks he could tell us his version of the Ring Saga.

Fay Wray... what really went on with the big fella.

Ethan Edwards... why he never killed Debbie.

Pat Garrett... did he really get Billy in the back?

Lt. Gonville Bromhead... how he'd have won at Rorkes Drift if he'd been in command.

Judy Benjamin... army stories while we looked at her.

Mildred Ratched... why McMurphy got his just desserts.

Rick Blaine... what happened after he saw the plane off.

Ellen Ripley... all about the creatures while we looked at her.

Lorena Wood... the end of the West, after she'd seen the worst of it.

Oops... sceadugenga.

The Manchester City squad who beat Man United last sunday

Sven Goran Erikkson can also sit at the table but even though Thaksin can foot the bill, he will have to miss this one out or serve the courses

The Manchester City squad who beat Man United last sunday

Sven Goran Erikkson can also sit at the table but even though Thaksin can foot the bill, he will have to miss this one out or serve the courses

Somchai and Sparky will be the after dinner speakers and keep every one enthralled with their football knowledge.

The Manchester City squad who beat Man United last sunday

Sven Goran Erikkson can also sit at the table but even though Thaksin can foot the bill, he will have to miss this one out or serve the courses

Somchai and Sparky will be the after dinner speakers and keep every one enthralled with their football knowledge.

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooo, please

You're conducting some kind of psychological experiment, right ?

Hoping this is not a Last Supper, and that there will be many other dining combinations in different places & times to look forward to, I shall conjure forth the "first 11" to enter my head (at this particular moment) :

Dorothy Parker

Mandaway Yunupingu

Harry Secombe

Emily Dickinson

John Clark ( NZ'er)

Lily Tomlin

David Attenborough

Cleopatra

Peter Ustinov

Dame Edna Everage

Salvador Dali (he can bring the lobster)

The Manchester City squad who beat Man United last sunday

Sven Goran Erikkson can also sit at the table but even though Thaksin can foot the bill, he will have to miss this one out or serve the courses

Somchai and Sparky will be the after dinner speakers and keep every one enthralled with their football knowledge.

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooo, please

I would rather have bamboo shards shoved under my fingernails.

Ladies and Gentleman,

all the dinner reservations have been accepted and I must say the management of Milliways Restaurant is very impressed with the range of invitees plus the quality of guests. Lannarebirth please be advised we have contacted Jesus for you and he said that he is sorry he can't attend but is planning on a return soon

Mr Soundman please note that the offer was for a single party only and you have requested a split dinner group. Normally this would not be acceptable but we (the Milliways Management) would really like to see the Bush, Tyson, Moore party get it on but not as much as we are sure you do in the private booth. We have discussed the Elle McPherson request and our "time management technician" has declared that he can oblige your request. We have opted for her to be aged 25 - if you wish to alter this further please advise. You should be aware that intergalactic rules of "age of consent" do apply. On a similar note we are able to supply the mirror but you need to bring your own Credit Card (to pay for the meal) and your own supply of Columbian Marching Powder. We did consider suggesting you may want to include a member of the Columbian Cocaine Cartel in the party but who are we to interfere.

The Bojangles party has been moved to the Function room simply because of numbers. k.Thaksin has declined the invitation (we apologise on his behalf). His reason was that if Jesus wasn't attending neither was he. Mr Sven Goran Erikkson will be taking over the table waiting duties in k. Thaksin's absence. We hope this will be acceptable to both teams. Please note that all members of the Manchester United and City teams will be searched on leaving the premises in case they inadventently drop some of the silverware in their pocket. We are also able to provide free lessons in table manners and how to eat with a fork for anyone who wishes to avail themself of this facility.

We hope that you are enjoying you time and will be sending the date time modules for you to attend the dinner functions.

regards

CB

(Milliways)

3) A galactic protection shield will be imposed in case you wish to invite mortal enemies. Note: Milliways reserve the right to impose additional screening procedures for preventing guests inadvertently bringing in weapons of mass or singular distruction.

86? Shield...

WaiWai has two of my guests, Dot Parker and Cleo.

I don't do seating arrangements. 11 chairs, 12 guests and odd man/chick out has to serve.

OK, I got "whydya do it?"questions for JC snd Hitler, but Miss Manners says "no discussions of politics or religion at the dinner table."

Dottie Parker

Steve Martin

Omar Khayyam

the guy who's wife divorced him coz he was at his girlfriend's apartment when 9-11 happened and when he finally answered his cell phone at 11am and his wife asked him where he was and he said "at the office" she told him his office at the World Trade Centre was blown up about 9am that morning

the chick who invented the wheel

Hooch

Sir John Franklin (captain of the freeze-dried Franklin expidition)

Jimi Hendrix

Tawara Machi (the chick who revolutionised haiku)

Sakamoto Ryuichi

Leona Helmsley

Jettie (I always sit at the head of the table)

Interesting list Jettie. You clearly gave it more thought than my 30 seconds. So tell me, Hooch the Duth painter, or Hooch the French Mastiff? Why Leona? Perhaps the most unsympathetic woman I can think of.

Okay, I'll try this as I have been thinking about it! This is the seating arrangement.

Vincent Van Gogh------------------------Jan Vermeer

Suegha------------------------------------Mozart (Wolfgang Amadeus)

Salvador Dali-----------------------------Robert Shumann

Rembrant (Harrmenszoon van Rijn)----Leonardo (da Vinci)

Jan Van Eyck------------------------------Leonard Cohen

Rebekah (my wife)-----------------------Issac Newton

A quick rational then. 6 of my favourite Artists - great art discussions ensue...

2 of my favourite composers, might be overwhelmed by the artists, but we could have a good jam session at the end of the night... I suppose I should include Mr Cohan with this category!

My wife who is the most interesting person ever, and a great mixer with others, a wonderful conversationalist...

Issac Newton was a fellow monotheist, I'd just love to discuss spiritual matters with him.

All in all a great night would be had by all. All were fond of a drink or two as well.

Note to CB, can I organise another night with different guests?

Good question.

I'd be somewhere halfway down one of the long sides of the rectangle/dinner table.

I'm not filtering out people who've been named on other tables, as per the OP.

What i'd ask Milliways however, is to stand open for a potential impromptu jam session, if our table gets in the mood.

David Gilmour (Guitar legend of Pink Floyd)

Douglas N. Adams (one of my fav. writers)

---

Ella Fitzgerald

Grace Kelly

---

Jack Kerouac

Kayo Klown (Table Host)

---

Ruth Brown

Edith Piaf

---

Tom Waits

Jimi Hendrix

---

Elis Regina

Sean Connery

Ok, reasons shouldn't be necessary for most of you who know me, but:

Each on eof these people has an immense talent in their craft that I admire tremendously. They also each like or idolise at least one (or more) of the other guests and hence would be flabbergasted to be there.

More importantly though, as far as I know each enjoys a nice bevvie, and each has many good stories to tell. And each knows how to tell a story well.

What more could we want?

Please note also, the easy spread of man/woman/man/woman as per my daddy used to teach me and the spread of the two humourists Tom and Douglas at opposing ends of the table.

On stand by, I have Stevie Ray Vaughn, Jeff Buckley, Winston Churchill, Dylan (Bob), Marley (bob), some of the heavy drinking Olivers and Oliviers, Janis Joplin, and Madonna circa 1989.

edit: formattin and standby list

Table for 12 , please, mein host

My guests this evening will be:

Mata Hari ..................... Lord Byron

Humphrey Bogart ......... Lauren Bacall

NR .................. Keith Moon

James Dean.......... Edith Cavell

Marilyn Monroe.......... William Blake

Axl Rose/Slash* .......... Rosa Parkes

* whichever can make it

Alternates would include: Laurence Olivier, Amelia Earhart (sp), Siegfried Sassoon, Gary Larson, Billy Connolly, Princess Diana, Bob Dylan, Gustav Klimt & Nelson Mandella.

Why? Just because...

Dear Guests of Milliways Restaurant at the end of the Bedlam part of the Universe.

I have been impressed with the selections of guests you have invited to the dinner party and we at Milliways will be very pleased to offer our facilities for you pleasure.

Please note from an earlier message of mine that you may invite guests who are also attending a different table. This is because of the dynamics of temporal time/space continuem. Conseuently it is certainly possible to have Jimi Hendrix attend three or more tables at the same time. You should however not invite the same person more than once to the same table. This can cause the time line to flux and also the concept of having three Rodney Dangerfields at the same table beggars imagination.

Discussion with Milliways head office has taken place and they as I are so impressed with your selections that we will offer you a second dinner party. You may do this at the same time as the first or on a different time line as you see fit. Please note however that inviting the full compliment of more football teams is outside of the original instruction and as penalty Milliways may cause them to be relegated to third division.

I also spoke with the director of musical functions and she has given approval to use the star light room for any impromtu jams you may wish to have. I am currently reviewing the logistics of having the mega music hall refitted out for the Milliways Super Session in which case we will ask our guests to put together a band using any person living or dead from any band they wish.

If messers Kayo, Coldcrush, and Robski wish to do a rave party they can be located in the Industrial Noise Room which we also use for the Bagpipes for Beginners and the Country & Western Jamboree.

your host

CB

Miliways

My dinner guests would be:

Ghandi - More roast beef for the rest of us.

Jesus - Handy when the wine is running short.

Sir Winston Churchill - Keeps Jesus busy.

Stephen Leacock & Mark Twain - Interesting anecdotes during dinner.

Martin Luthur King jr - Saying grace before dinner (seat him close to Jesus so he doesn't have to yell).

Ronald Reagan - Always forgets the address but tells such great stories when he finally arrives.

Martha Stewart - Can do dishes as part of her community service.

Margaret Thatcher - With you know who making water into wine, someone has to drive Reagan and Churchill home.

Ulysses_G - Knows where to get the best food.

Kayo - Someone to do shots with Churchill

I dont want to do my list yet......but seeing some of the guests I have to say that a couple of table could interest me....in particular Suegha's table has many guests Id be interest in:

van Gogh, da Vinci, Rembrandt and Dali are all artists I enjoy....but also NR's Klimt

on the musician front -- again similar taste to Suegha but you missed out my J.S. Bach!

from Kayo's table Id have to borrow Adams....my favorite author

anyway.....this is not exactly my guest list.....Ill prolly just pop over to these tables and do my rounds

(Ms. host of the event rather than any one table...that way I gotta walk the hall, smile, pop over to give some a peck on the cheek and exchange a few pleasantries )

Miss Otis regrets, she's unable to lunch today, madam,

Miss Otis regrets, she's unable to lunch today.

She is sorry to be delayed,

but last evening down in Lover's Lane she strayed, madam,

Miss Otis regrets, she's unable to lunch today.

When she woke up and found that her dream of love was gone, madam,

She ran to the man who had led her so far astray,

And from under her velvet gown,

She drew a gun and shot her love down, madam,

Miss Otis regrets, she's unable to lunch today.

When the mob came and got her and dragged her from the jail, madam,

They strung her upon the old willow across the way,

And the moment before she died,

She lifted up her lovely head and cried, madam......

Miss Otis regrets, she's unable to lunch today.

Miss Otis regrets, she's unable to lunch today

Ella Fitzgerald - Miss Otis Regrets (She's Unable To Lunch Today) lyrics

http://www.lyrics007.com/Ella%20Fitzgerald...)%20Lyrics.html

I dont want to do my list yet......but seeing some of the guests I have to say that a couple of table could interest me....in particular Suegha's table has many guests Id be interest in:

(Ms. host of the event rather than any one table...that way I gotta walk the hall, smile, pop over to give some a peck on the cheek and exchange a few pleasantries )

MiG you can create a party of your own and pick guests from other tables if you wish. That is perfectly acceptable. The other solution is for you to do the rounds of each table and we will happily provide you with a tray and pay you for the night as a waitress.

your potential employer

CB

Milliways

Okay, I'll try this as I have been thinking about it! This is the seating arrangement.

Vincent Van Gogh------------------------Jan Vermeer

Suegha------------------------------------Mozart (Wolfgang Amadeus)

Salvador Dali-----------------------------Robert Shumann

Rembrant (Harrmenszoon van Rijn)----Leonardo (da Vinci)

Jan Van Eyck------------------------------Leonard Cohen

Rebekah (my wife)-----------------------Issac Newton

I dont want to do my list yet......but seeing some of the guests I have to say that a couple of table could interest me....in particular Suegha's table has many guests Id be interest in:

van Gogh, da Vinci, Rembrandt and Dali are all artists I enjoy....but also NR's Klimt

on the musician front -- again similar taste to Suegha but you missed out my J.S. Bach!

from Kayo's table Id have to borrow Adams....my favorite author

anyway.....this is not exactly my guest list.....Ill prolly just pop over to these tables and do my rounds

MiG to help you out I have prepared the following table for you using suggestions from your post. You will have some guests who will be at more than one table at the same time. Personally I am surprised that everyone else hasn't included you in their guest list. The idea of 6-12 MiGs showing up at tables across the dining room watching the dessert trolly amble past is an interesting concept. For your information Belgium gets most of its better chocolates from Milliways Chocolate emporium which is located in the hall off the foyer.

Vincent van Gogh

Leonardo da Vinci

Rembrandt

Salvador Dali

Gustav Klimt

MiG16 - in the centre of the universe

J.S. Bach

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

Leonard Cohen

Douglas Adams

You may of course change the order of guests and add or remove anyone you wish. You have space for another two guests - perhaps you may like to choose a football player or two from Arsenal?

your host

CB

Milliways The Restaurant at the End of Bedlam

Table for 12 , please, mein host

It will be my pleasure Ms Rain. The table is being organised at this moment. Actually it will be done in about 10 Million years time. Due to the way time and space bends it was ready about 30,000 years ago which is before any of the guests where born let alone on your list. Such is the way time and space goes weird when you try to think about it, however it makes it easy to book sporting events after they have finished and you kwow whether it was worth going to see it live. It also means you never miss out on getting a seat for any night you want.

My guests this evening will be:

Mata Hari ..................... Lord Byron

Humphrey Bogart ......... Lauren Bacall

NR .................. Keith Moon

James Dean.......... Edith Cavell

Marilyn Monroe.......... William Blake

Axl Rose/Slash* .......... Rosa Parkes

* whichever can make it

Your guests have been notified but Slash will be the person attending. Mr Rose advises that he is just putting the finishing touches on the album "Chinese Boxes" and it will be released any time soon.

Mr James Dean has offered to drive you home in his Porsche but we advise against it and suggest you take the courtesy time portal instead

Why? Just because...

And a very good reason it is - we look forward to hosting you and your guests at Milliways.

your host

CB

Milliways the restaurant at the wrinkled end of the space fabric

Personally I am surprised that everyone else hasn't included you in their guest list. The idea of 6-12 MiGs showing up at tables across the dining room watching the dessert trolly amble past is an interesting concept.

You have space for another two guests - perhaps you may like to choose a football player or two from Arsenal?

now that WOULD be interesting. but I hope the weight gained is also shared amongst the 6-12 MiGs!!

I dont do waitressing I only socialise

definitely some Arsenal boys in particular Marc Overmars and Dennis Bergkhamp! maybe Henry.....and also Kurt Cobain!

anyway this is still not my list.

PS. edited after looking at CB's list for me and my possible additions above -- no female

Personally I am surprised that everyone else hasn't included you in their guest list. The idea of 6-12 MiGs showing up at tables across the dining room watching the dessert trolly amble past is an interesting concept.

You have space for another two guests - perhaps you may like to choose a football player or two from Arsenal?

now that WOULD be interesting. but I hope the weight gained is also shared amongst the 6-12 MiGs!!

I dont do waitressing I only socialise

definitely some Arsenal boys in particular Marc Overmars and Dennis Bergkhamp! maybe Henry.....and also Kurt Cobain!

anyway this is still not my list.

I look forward to seeing your final list and please be advised that a bonus feature of intergalactic time travel is that you can use the zero weight gain feature. This free option allows you to spread any weight gained from the meal over the next 10,000,000 or so years. Consequently you can nosh like a hog at the trough and the 5 kilos gained will become microinfintesimal when spread over that amount of time. If you like we offer the retrospecitive option which is handy for those people like myself who have alas added a gram or two excess weight over the years and need to remove them to remain our trim taut self (image). This is also very useful for removing the inconvenience of hangovers. Our guests can drink like Oliver Reed on a booze binge and postpone the hangover until a more convenient time like after they are dead.

Your host

CB

Milliways