For multiple reasons, I've recently become more interested in trading in Thailand for the Philippines.

One thing that's impossible not to notice about the culture of expats there is the seeming institutionalization of the expectation that expats are going to get romantically involved with a Filipina.

Well and good I suppose if you can avoid marriage, as alas marriage in Philippines locks you in as divorce is (mostly) illegal there.

Contrast this to the social expectations for GAY expats.

Well, I don't know very much at all about that, but I do know that in Catholic church dominated Philippines legalization of same sex marriage is not anything to expect to happen.

So in spite of the homophobia that exists there (clear to me it's more severe than in Thailand) advantage to gay expats as they can't possibly get trapped into marriage.

If you happen to have insight into the social situation for gay expats there, please comment.

No, I'm not take about nightlife or bars, but more about the level of homophobia and expectations.

What in the world is this load of nonsense?

4 minutes ago, Priorexpat said:

What in the world is this load of nonsense?

When the demand for homophobia exceeds the supply…..

As I'm particularly interested in Iloilo City which is regarded as a rather wealthy provincial conservative city of more reserved people it was promising to see this.

www.facebook.com/OfficeOfTheLGBTAffairsIloiloCity/

But that says nothing about the expat culture.

Known at the City Of Love but obviously not that kind of love it's not remotely a draw for gay expats. Gay expats I assume would overwhelmingly be drawn to Manila, (especially), Cebu City, and Puerto Gallera,

12 hours ago, Airalee said:

When the demand for homophobia exceeds the supply…..

I don't know your experience in life but I recall meeting a neighbor in Jomtien who was at very first very friendly telling me about all of his adventures with Thai girls which was fine but to be real I had to tell him that isn't my scene, and for years after that he refused to even say hello to me. That was a very ugly feeling.

I guess its time to mention the time I was moving to a new house in a new neighborhood to be greeted with graffiti on the wall saying F--S. Certainly no demand for that.

It's not a matter of parades, rainbow flags, or nightlife but people not being bigots and not seeing gay people as fellow humans just because of being gay.

It's of course fine, normal, and natural for people to like or not like you based on lots of personal factors, but to totally shut out people ONLY on the basis of their sexual orientation is really quite horrible. That is homophobia, and no, there is no demand for it. That's in your imagination.

On 3/20/2026 at 2:34 PM, Jingthing said:

For multiple reasons, I've recently become more interested in trading in Thailand for the Philippines.

One thing that's impossible not to notice about the culture of expats there is the seeming institutionalization of the expectation that expats are going to get romantically involved with a Filipina.

Well and good I suppose if you can avoid marriage, as alas marriage in Philippines locks you in as divorce is (mostly) illegal there.

Contrast this to the social expectations for GAY expats.

Well, I don't know very much at all about that, but I do know that in Catholic church dominated Philippines legalization of same sex marriage is not anything to expect to happen.

So in spite of the homophobia that exists there (clear to me it's more severe than in Thailand) advantage to gay expats as they can't possibly get trapped into marriage.

If you happen to have insight into the social situation for gay expats there, please comment.

No, I'm not take about nightlife or bars, but more about the level of homophobia and expectations.

I have been lead to believe that so long as you up the ante the Pope is just some dude somewhere . Marriage? Yeah whatever .

Obsessed with yelling at everyone that he's gay.

The rest of us just get on with our daily lives, .... enjoying life.

3 minutes ago, tubby johnson said:

Obsessed with yelling at everyone that he's gay.

The rest of us just get on with our daily lives, .... enjoying life.

I've never yelled that even one time in my life.

However, if you're meeting new people and you're exploring a possible friendship it's basically lying if you let it go too long without being honest about who you are. Lying isn't a good basis for a friendship, is it? Perhaps you who is clearly straight don't understand that. Heterosexuality is always presumed except in cases of very visible/obvious gay people who are the minority of gay people.

There is on experience I had with this that was particularly poignant that fills me with regret. A very very close childhood friend , often hung out at his house and was close to his entire family as well. For some reason I felt it would ruin things to come out to him. I even went to strip clubs with him, he was that kind of randy dude. So he was the very last early friend that I finally came out to, when I was well into my 20's. He instantly cut off contact with me even though I apologized for lying to him for so long and tried to contact him later. I felt he was justified to reject me just based on me LYING to him for so many years so I couldn't really blame him. On the other hand as he never said, maybe it was because I was gay and I was right to not come out to him for so long. I'll never know. I think he was the kind of straight guy who assumed I was attracted to him as well, which I totally NEVER was. So times as a kid where there clothes being changed, maybe he imagined homophobically that I had been perving on him. But as said wasn't into him that way, so no perving.

In the context of the Philippines, I know for a fact male expats are going to ask about anyone's story with Filipinas VERY EARLY upon meeting. It's just a fact of life there.

5 minutes ago, tubby johnson said:

Obsessed with yelling at everyone that he's gay.

The rest of us just get on with our daily lives, .... enjoying life.

Good grief tubby, next you'll be yelling that some of your best friends are gay.

I found a facebook group for gay expat in the Philippines.

It has about four members and no activity.

Christianity* / a seppo accent / terrrible food.

No thanks.

*they do like it up the pooper though.

3 minutes ago, Ralf001 said:

Christianity* / a seppo accent / terrrible food.

No th

4 minutes ago, Ralf001 said:

Christianity* / a seppo accent / terrrible food.

No thanks.

*they do like it up the pooper though.

The Catholic influence is pervasive, that's for sure.

It's a bit much that's for sure and it can become tiresome.

A Filipino accent isn't Ameican.

Terrible food? Well compared to Thailand but good international food is available and interestingly Iloilo (my current main interest there) has very special food.

It's actually a foodie destination now.

Anal stuff? Some do, some don't but they will cross themselves, cover up their Catholic stuff before indulging.

The food in Thailand is 100% better than the food in PI.

White Beach Puerto Galera, nothing edible. Complete cr*p.

Don't know about hetero/gay nonsense, seemed to be a lot of LB's, not my bag, maybe OP o.k. there?

On 3/20/2026 at 2:34 PM, Jingthing said:

there is the seeming institutionalization of the expectation that expats are going to get romantically involved with a Filipina.

Where could this come from??? Let me see... https://www.youtube.com/@SmartGirlPhilippines

5 hours ago, Priorexpat said:

The food in Thailand is 100% better than the food in PI.

White Beach Puerto Galera, nothing edible. Complete cr*p.

Don't know about hetero/gay nonsense, seemed to be a lot of LB's, not my bag, maybe OP o.k. there?

Well while I might want to visit Puerto Galero, it's not the kind of place I would ever consider living in.

As far as food, let's look again at a food oriented city such as Iloilo or indeed BGC in Manila.

Granting that overall Thai food is better than Filipino especially the street food, how about those of us that love INTERNATIONAL options as well as local wherever we live in the world?

For example, s Korean food or Chinese food in BGC, etc. going to generally be worse than in Thailand? I seriously doubt it.

just no, you arent far from the grave, you have already found your place and know everything worth knowing

whenever it is anything you want.

to start up now, somewhere else, is a non starter

Dated a Filipina from Davao (more accurately Kapalong about 2 hours north of Davao City), & she had a few gay guy friends, visited >30 times & never witnesed any of them be treated any different than anybody else, there was certainly no prejudice against them.

BTW, if I were to move to Philippines it would be to the Visayas (Davao or Cebu, but not Cebu City), I feel Ililo would be too small/quiet for me.

6 minutes ago, SamSpade said:

Dated a Filipina from Davao (more accurately Kapalong about 2 hours north of Davao City), & she had a few gay guy friends, visited >30 times & never witnesed any of them be treated any different than anybody else, there was certainly no prejudice against them.

BTW, if I were to move to Philippines it would be to the Visayas (Davao or Cebu, but not Cebu City), I feel Ililo would be too small/quiet for me.

Yeah depends on what you're looking for in different stages in life.

My impression is that Iloilo is kind of a boom town and growing but not at a crazy fast pace.

8 minutes ago, SamSpade said:

Dated a Filipina from Davao (more accurately Kapalong about 2 hours north of Davao City), & she had a few gay guy friends, visited >30 times & never witnesed any of them be treated any different than anybody else, there was certainly no prejudice against them.

BTW, if I were to move to Philippines it would be to the Visayas (Davao or Cebu, but not Cebu City), I feel Ililo would be too small/quiet for me.

I'm mainly interested in a Plan B if I need to leave Thailand other than back to USA.

No residence security in Thailand.

My current short list includes Philippines, Cambodia, Mexico, and Panama.

Philippine might be easy ogistically though Cambodia has the easiest visa.

I used to hang out with gay Filipinos I the US

I felt that we shared a language but not a culture. It's a very different culture. People get fooled that it isn't because of the English speaking.

I find it interesting that for a country that's predominantly Catholic that their are so many ladyboys there. That kinda leads me to believe that, just like Thailand, their is a social acceptance to alternative lifestyles. But obviously Thailand has made much more significant strides in assuring equal protection and rights for gays whereas I suspect, with no first hand info, that the Philippines has not normalized the same rights for gays like Thailand has done.

On 4/12/2026 at 11:01 PM, watgate said:

I find it interesting that for a country that's predominantly Catholic that their are so many ladyboys there. That kinda leads me to believe that, just like Thailand, their is a social acceptance to alternative lifestyles. But obviously Thailand has made much more significant strides in assuring equal protection and rights for gays whereas I suspect, with no first hand info, that the Philippines has not normalized the same rights for gays like Thailand has done.

Having traveled pretty extensively in these countries I believe there is an acceptance of a third gender.

How this lands in a religious sense? Couldn't say......marriage between a man and a woman (?),,, well if the man is a "Tom" (a woman going as a man) I'm not certain that the fact that the man has a vagina really goes against the church.

So we have:

Men

women

third gender Ladyboys and Toms

OP can pipe in here regarding being gay. IMO means a man who likes men, women who like women. Women who like their Tom's are still seeing a man, vice-versa some of the prettiest women are Katoey/Ladyboys so are those guys gay if what they see a really pretty woman? Back to the overall acceptance of a third gender.

Social acceptance of trans people and gay people are very different things

A great example is Iran.

Gay people murdered.

Trans people offered surgery.

I have been following your foruming adventures for almost 20 years here and in the anals of internet.

I never noticed you were gay

27 minutes ago, Jingthing said:

Social acceptance of trans people and gay people are very different things

A great example is Iran.

Gay people murdered.

Trans people offered surgery.

Your OP was regarding Thailand and the Philippines.

If you want to start a new thread "how gays are treated around the world" I think that would be better as the Iranian context doesn't make sense in this thread.

1 hour ago, Priorexpat said:

Your OP was regarding Thailand and the Philippines.

If you want to start a new thread "how gays are treated around the world" I think that would be better as the Iranian context doesn't make sense in this thread.

Blah blah blah.

I replied to your post.

9 hours ago, Celsius said:

I have been following your foruming adventures for almost 20 years here and in the anals of internet.

I never noticed you were gay

There you go JT, a Forum hookup!!

S.E. Asia is a marriage thirst trap.

On 5/8/2026 at 8:16 PM, gargamon said:

S.E. Asia is a marriage thirst trap.

If you are a damn fool idiot.

Off to SE Asia, holiday, meet someone fun/nice and now you are getting married?

Got a pal in the U.S., just because you have intercourse with the them does not mean you have to marry them. He's on wife #3, previous 2 he bought houses for = land in Korat for the family. Pass on that !

A related video.

OK, there isn't much new information in it and these guys are a bit silly, but it's interesting to me that they short listed Iloilo City. For better or worse, Iloilo City is starting to get a lot more attention. Such as on the Vagabond Awake channel as well.

The topic title reads "hetero". When did it become a gay thread?