Stupid Product Labels

ON A HAIRDRYER:

*Do not use while sleeping.

ON A BAR OF DIAL SOAP:

*Directions: Use like regular soap.

FROZEN DINNER SERVING SUGGESTION:

*Defrost.

ON TESCO'S TIRIMISU DESSERT:

*Do not turn upside down. (Printed on the bottom of the box.)

ON PACKAGING FOR A ROWENTA IRON:

*Do not iron clothes on body.

ON BOOTS' CHILDREN'S COUGH MEDICINE:

*Do not drive car or operate machinery.

ON NYTOL (A SLEEP AID):

*Warning: May cause drowsiness.

ON A KOREAN KITCHEN KNIFE:

*Warning: Keep out of children.

ON A STRING OF CHINESE-MADE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS:

*For indoor or outdoor use only.

ON A JAPANESE FOOD PROCESSOR:

*Not to be used for the other use.

ON SAINSBURY'S PEANUTS:

*Warning: contains nuts

ON AN AMERICAN AIRLINES PACKET OF NUTS:

*Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.

ON A SWEDISH CHAINSAW:

*Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.

In the UK its now standard for most food products to have a warning that they may contain traces of nuts. One of the better ones I can remember was for nightol sleeping aides. " WARNING MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS " The UK has become so risk averse its laughable. Councils ban hanging flower baskets in case they fall an injure somebody. To date nobody has ever been injured by one but it does nothing to stop the health and safety taliban. A woman in a beefeater restaunt was made to sign a disclaimer when she asked for a doggy bag to take home the leftovers from a meal in case she later sued.