Have You Found........friendship In Thailand?

[vrsushi]

We all know that Thailand is a great place to find love, sex, cheap living, good food, sun, sea, in fact many of things that are needed for the good life, but how about that often neglected requirement, friendship?

What's been your experience?

[jingjoe]

Yes. I now have 6 or so "thai mates" (built up over 10 years or more) that I can truly count on, if I'm ever in trouble, lost, or need an instant over the phone interpreter.

[Florin]

If you mean Thais, one (in nearly 14 years)...if including local expats & such, several...

[intumult]

Ex g/f is now a good friend.

In this last year I seem to have made inroads into friendships with Thais and this seems to lead on to other associations that are leading into friendships.

The one thing I do note is the lack of 'Farang' association. Too many seem to be more than happy to ignore fellow Farang - but that has been dealt with previously in other threads I have seen.

As Jingjoe has said, I also benefit from having Thai friends who will interpret for me, also, they will generally go out of their way to help or guide me, if and when I need help. They also seem to have friends who are more than willing to be that bit extra helpful, be it fixing the car, finding a new apartment, or, even down to acting as that interpreter when a lady asks them to do so to be able to talk to me, or in other situations. If they (Thai friends) feel I am being ripped off, they will also step in and erm, help

[retirednavyman]

Ex g/f is now a good friend.

In this last year I seem to have made inroads into friendships with Thais and this seems to lead on to other associations that are leading into friendships.

The one thing I do note is the lack of 'Farang' association. Too many seem to be more than happy to ignore fellow Farang - but that has been dealt with previously in other threads I have seen.

As Jingjoe has said, I also benefit from having Thai friends who will interpret for me, also, they will generally go out of their way to help or guide me, if and when I need help. They also seem to have friends who are more than willing to be that bit extra helpful, be it fixing the car, finding a new apartment, or, even down to acting as that interpreter when a lady asks them to do so to be able to talk to me, or in other situations. If they (Thai friends) feel I am being ripped off, they will also step in and erm, help

Thanks for the nice story!

[ajahnlau]

My circle of Thai friends are mainly motorcycle riders. The Farangs are assorted teachers and retirees.

[greenmember]

I have no close friends in both Thailand and Vietnam. I only communicate via email with someone who never asks stupid questions like "How much does your husband give you per month? How much you send to your mother per month (which I don't)?"

I don't feel that I lose anything.

[zaza]

I have no close friends in both Thailand and Vietnam. I only communicate via email with someone who never asks stupid questions like "How much does your husband give you per month? How much you send to your mother per month (which I don't)?"

I don't feel that I lose anything.

You'd skipped very major questions :

How much is your salary?

Is the house you are living in yours or rented?

[zaza]

We all know that Thailand is a great place to find love, sex, cheap living, good food, sun, sea, in fact many of things that are needed for the good life, but how about that often neglected requirement, friendship?

What's been your experience?

..........a great place to find love..(are you sure? )

Anyways; I was lucky enough to have a couple of very close and honest friends (women &men)- (Farangs & Thais) whom they had shared and (still) with me the bad times (more) than the good times.They are very dear to me as my own caring family here.

All my respect and gratitude for them and hope them the best of luck to find a less troublesome friend than me .

[lazeeboy]

made many freinds over the years in thailand ,mainly westerners ,but recently many have gone home or moved on ,such as life..

[gunnyd]

Just my good friends Jack Daniels and Jim Beam.

[zaza]

Just my good friends Jack Daniels and Jim Beam.

naaaaaaaaaaaa, come on! those are not friends!

They are our God Fathers here!

[greenmember]

You'd skipped very major questions :

How much is your salary?

Is the house you are living in yours or rented?

You rock!

One more: how many times per week (????) LOL

[Nignoy]

have made quite a few thai friends over the years, in thailand and europe , my wife has a few thai friends too, nice to have some one to turn to when help or advice is needed,Nignoy

[ThaiWanderer68]

Made a lot of good friends over the years here, but inevitably many move on. For expats I think Asia attracts people with something a little atypical of the people of their home country. So we all have something in common to go to a new place, which is a great basis for making new friends.

Most of the best friends I have in Thailand are western though, plus a few locals...

Edited February 21, 2008 by ThaiWanderer68

[Boo]

I have several good thai freinds, 2 are incredibly good friend who I have known for over 10 years now & well before I met my husband. They have both, at times, acted as big brothers/protectors & I am lucky enough to see them both in thailand &/or the UK at least twice a year but we email & talk on the phone regularly.

[howtoescape]

I have been trying to get rid of the friends i have in England for the last 15 years, i am down to about 3 that i actually like.

The rest have been relegated to acquaintance.

I am sure there is less need for true friends as you get older.

Your Truly

Billie (not many) Mates.

[johniescfc]

over a period of 4 years i have many farang friends and quite a few thai friends.in the uk i also had many friends,including customers in my sales job.

come to think of it i am a very nice man lol.

[distortedlink]

Just before I came to live in Thailand 5 years ago, I was quite excited thinking about the many ways how my life would change once I am a resident in Chiang Mai and all the new friendly people I was going to meet, a complete restart to my life.

Well, 99% of my dream came true, except the part of meeting new friendly people.

My Thai neighbours and other Thai people I have met on my travels are wonderful people. But my Thai language capabilities are very limited and this does put a barrier between myself and my Thai friends when meeting on social occasions.

As for other English speaking Farangs I have met here, I found them inhospitable bordering on the plain ole nasty. I have actually attempted to say good morning or good afternoon to other Englishmen I have passed in the street only to receive the traditional Farang greeting of the flared left nostril and tight lipped stare.

I did once join the Ex pats club here in Chiang Mai. The whole meeting was an endurance of some loud mouthed American speaker rattling on for one and a half hours, then after the rant, had to withstand for the next 30 minutes a woman speaker trying to sell condos and when finished stood around being bombarded by some other members trying to sell me stuff for the next 10 minutes before everyone drifted off to wherever they were going. I was not impressed and after giving it one more try at a following meeting, I gave it up.

Now, before the wind up merchants start posting comments about seeking a new best friend, lonely hearts and all that crap, I am very happy living in Chiang Mai with my family, have many good acquaintances here that I have known for years, Thai and Farangs, plus my bar mates and out regular socializing.

My point is that for Farangs considering living long term in Thailand will not find any Farang support, advisories or communities here as these are not community minded people, plus new settlers to realize that if they are not into the bar scene, or don't have families here, could find themselves living in isolation without persons to converse with in their native language.

Edited February 22, 2008 by distortedlink

[pop_corn]

I could unlikely say that I don't have any close friends here.. I know a lot of people, but that’s another thing.... now, I really think is a personal problem, I’m not the kind of friendly person, and it takes me time to build up friendships, even relationships.. Weird.. I’m not a grumpy alien either, I may be shy? Well, if u know me in person u wouldn’t think so, most of the people that "knows me" (put it like that cuz I think that thre are no one that can really say that) will think that I’m a pretty strong character woman.. uhmm.. Somehow yes, somehow not.. Depends.

Anyways, I don't blame the rest of the people for not being my prototype for a friendship or anything else.

yeah, im weird. haha...

[distortedlink]

I have no close friends in both Thailand and Vietnam. I only communicate via email with someone who never asks stupid questions like "How much does your husband give you per month? How much you send to your mother per month (which I don't)?"

I don't feel that I lose anything.

I would get a refund from the charm school, it didn`t work.

[BigSnake]

Yes, many many Thai friends as well as Brits, Aust, Cand, etc etc, enjoy them all.

[Momo8]

Opposite goes for me.In Thailand I am very good friends with a number of Thais for over 10 years one who is going through a family crisis at the moment and we're like sisters.In China I'm always regarded as a sister only in HK this has changed where people are more materialistic and want to know you for what benefits you can bring them.

Aussies are easy to make friends with I guess.Treat people as you would want to be treated yourself.

[choppychugger]

Many friends along the way,,, good and bad. Amazing how as you get older you can count your hardcore mates on 2 hands. My best mate nowadays being my little 19mth old son.

[seonai]

Loads of Thai friends and with Thai's... time doesn't matter so even if you haven't seen each other in ages it's still the same welcome back feeling

[toptuan]

I have found it much easier to make close friends in Thailand than in the West. Thais are less guarded, more transparent, and eager to make cross-cultural connections once they get over an initial shyness. In the West I had one close friend at a time (5-10 years each). But in Thailand after living here 5 years, I can count on five or six very close friends (at once) who'd give me the shirt off their backs.

Last week, one of my Thai friends showed up with two empty 50-gallon plastic barrels in the back of his pickup. As he unloaded them and dragged them into my bathroom, he explained to me that the city was going to have a water cut-off of three days, and he wanted to make sure I was "covered" by storing enough water ahead of time for bucket-showers, flushing the toilet, and dishes. He saved the day for us. All that friendly effort, unsolicited. it's so typical of the good Thai friends I have.

All of these friends I'm thinking of have genuine "naam-jai" (generosity with no strings attached, or no reciprocal expectations). Because of this, I dare say that I feel more "at home" in Thailand than in my country of origin.

[greenmember]

I could unlikely say that I don't have any close friends here.. I know a lot of people, but that's another thing.... now, I really think is a personal problem, I'm not the kind of friendly person, and it takes me time to build up friendships, even relationships.. Weird.. I'm not a grumpy alien either, I may be shy? Well, if u know me in person u wouldn't think so, most of the people that "knows me" (put it like that cuz I think that thre are no one that can really say that) will think that I'm a pretty strong character woman.. uhmm.. Somehow yes, somehow not.. Depends.

Anyways, I don't blame the rest of the people for not being my prototype for a friendship or anything else.

yeah, im weird. haha...

I'm weird too but I'm not shy. When I was in school, I was one of the 3 class leaders for 9 consecutive years. I can talk immediately with strangers. I'm very polite and friendly but when it comes to close friendship, I don't feel the need. I don't expect helps from friends and I don't have anything that they can help. If I have a problem, I know what to do. If I decide to do anything, I never regret. I still share my stories or concerns with friends I know before but I never meet them.

[CarlBkk]

I've found it hard to make good Thai male friends but easier to make Thai female friends (genuine friends). Over 7 years I would have loved to have made some good Thai male friends, but the ones I've been acquainted with have either turned out to be gay (and subsequently tried something stupid) or unreliable. By unreliable I mean they keep in vague communication by email, an SMS now and again but don't actually invite you out to their social gatherings often, or turn up to yours.

However, I have found it easier to make expat friends here than back at home.

[kiakaha]

I find that circles/cliques of expat friends in LOS tend to be more socio-economically-situationally bound than back in farangland.

[plachon]

Many Thai friends made over the years, but females outnumber males 3 to 1. Only one male friend that I have absolute trust in and would lend him a large sum of money if he asked, whereas others would have to do a bit more to prove their absolte trustworthiness when the cards are down. However, the same could be said for my farang friends and in most cases, it is understood a true friend will only borrow money from a friend as an absolute last resort, due to the risks of losing that friendship, should the money not be repaid.

It never ceases to amaze me the number of times that I read on TV the sob stories of people who say they lent money to "a friend", only to never see all or some of the money again.