Lady Boy In The Bedroom

[pop_corn]

there is a lie already... BE AWARE!

[mikethevigoman]

I thought I would relay this story for the opinions of the wise “sages” on this forum & compare their advice to my own reactions to this. My current “darling” of some 6 months acquaintance is a 3rd year student nurse at a college about a 1.5 hr bus ride from where I live. Normally, she has come to visit me on the weekends & things had been progressing along rather well. Recently, she was assigned to work/study in another rural area further away. She live in a sort of dormitory close to the clinic, with several other nurses to a room. Two weeks ago, I had to go to BKK to renew my visa & was gone during the week. She was due to visit me on the weekend upon my return. However, on Friday evening we got in an argument on the phone & she hung up unexpectedly & shut off her phone. I was not able to reconnect to her until Saturday afternoon after I had to call one of her girlfriends to contact her via her Mother. The reason for all this was some confusion as to which phone I had taken to BKK, as she had SMS’d me to another number that I did not have with me. (A long story). When I finally talked to her Saturday evening, she was “up to her ears” in schoolwork (she said) and we only talked for a few minutes. There did not seem to be anything further amiss at that time. During this weekend, by the way, most of the students had gone home as they normally due every weekend. She stayed on to do homework, she says. I called her again about 1:30 PM Sunday and after a few seconds conversation heard a male’s voice say “hello” in the background. I recognized this voice as that of a Lady Boy, fellow student. She was in her room at this time. I also heard her briefly cover the phone mouthpiece, as if to tell him to be quiet. I asked her who was there and she said nobody, which I knew was a lie. A couple of days later, when I asked about this again, she admitted that in fact he was in her room, but they were just working on a homework assignment & eating lunch. She said I should not worry, because he is a Lady Boy. He is just a “friend”. I am not stupid enough to believe that some would not jump at the chance to bang some Farang's girlfriend, to serve their ego, if nothing else.

Since that incident, she has pretty much swept it under the carpet and acted like nothing unusual ever happened. My attitude is that I no longer trust her and anything she says is subject to suspicion. I hate to sound so paranoid, but similar incidents have happened with other women, with the final proof being they were basically being dishonest about their activities. Sorry to ramble on so long, but I have been “fuming” about this for some time now. Fire Away - ladies & gents.

NEXT !

[girlx]

being a mangda to some girl who has a farang boyfriend is a classic use of their time.

sorry, doesn't mangda mean "pimp"?

They cannot just put their hand up and say "I lied" as it would cause them to lose face but they will chuck a relationship away and perhaps their whole lives.

haha, i know thais who even if you showed them video evidence of them doing something, they would still deny it to the death. very annoying for westerners who value honesty number one.

Edited April 12, 2008 by girlx

[Tingnongnoi]

being a mangda to some girl who has a farang boyfriend is a classic use of their time.

sorry, doesn't mangda mean "pimp"?

No think it's more like a toyboy, or living of the womens cash.

[SamuiJens]

being a mangda to some girl who has a farang boyfriend is a classic use of their time.

sorry, doesn't mangda mean "pimp"?

They cannot just put their hand up and say "I lied" as it would cause them to lose face but they will chuck a relationship away and perhaps their whole lives.

haha, i know thais who even if you showed them video evidence of them doing something, they would still deny it to the death. very annoying for westerners who value honesty number one.

Well the police seem to get the truth or at least the perp usually says he/her is guilty. I know the Thai court system "rewards" criminals for admitting their crimes.

Could learn some from this way at getting to the truth!

[DP25]

I already knew he was a Lady Boy, since she had told me such before.

Wait a sec here, the reason you know this is a ladyboy is only because your girlfriend told you? You've never actually seen this ladyboy, dressed up in womens clothes, long hair, and with breast implants walking around town? Maybe this 'ladyboy' is actually a muscular, young, straight Thai dude, and you were lied to from the beginning.

[Pepe']

I thought I would relay this story for the opinions of the wise "sages" on this forum & compare their advice to my own reactions to this. My current "darling" of some 6 months acquaintance is a 3rd year student nurse at a college about a 1.5 hr bus ride from where I live. Normally, she has come to visit me on the weekends & things had been progressing along rather well. Recently, she was assigned to work/study in another rural area further away. She live in a sort of dormitory close to the clinic, with several other nurses to a room. Two weeks ago, I had to go to BKK to renew my visa & was gone during the week. She was due to visit me on the weekend upon my return. However, on Friday evening we got in an argument on the phone & she hung up unexpectedly & shut off her phone. I was not able to reconnect to her until Saturday afternoon after I had to call one of her girlfriends to contact her via her Mother. The reason for all this was some confusion as to which phone I had taken to BKK, as she had SMS'd me to another number that I did not have with me. (A long story). When I finally talked to her Saturday evening, she was "up to her ears" in schoolwork (she said) and we only talked for a few minutes. There did not seem to be anything further amiss at that time. During this weekend, by the way, most of the students had gone home as they normally due every weekend. She stayed on to do homework, she says. I called her again about 1:30 PM Sunday and after a few seconds conversation heard a male's voice say "hello" in the background. I recognized this voice as that of a Lady Boy, fellow student. She was in her room at this time. I also heard her briefly cover the phone mouthpiece, as if to tell him to be quiet. I asked her who was there and she said nobody, which I knew was a lie. A couple of days later, when I asked about this again, she admitted that in fact he was in her room, but they were just working on a homework assignment & eating lunch. She said I should not worry, because he is a Lady Boy. He is just a "friend". I am not stupid enough to believe that some would not jump at the chance to bang some Farang's girlfriend, to serve their ego, if nothing else.

Since that incident, she has pretty much swept it under the carpet and acted like nothing unusual ever happened. My attitude is that I no longer trust her and anything she says is subject to suspicion. I hate to sound so paranoid, but similar incidents have happened with other women, with the final proof being they were basically being dishonest about their activities. Sorry to ramble on so long, but I have been "fuming" about this for some time now. Fire Away - ladies & gents.

Are you really so insecure that a ladyboy (that you identified as a ladyboy on your own) friend of your GF scares you off?

You are looking for a way out, an excuse. Be a man and just say 'bye'.

-------------------

Can't believe it agreeing with JD for the first and probably last time.

I would get together with her one more time and ream her ars out for good measure.

Just something to remember you by...

[farang prince]

TROLL ALERT!!!!!!!!

[rgs2001uk]

give the girl some credit, at least she didnt utter those immortal words, it was my brother.

[JetsetBkk]

Maybe - just maybe - she was doing her homework with this guy/gal as she said, but knowing how jealous you are she didn't want you to know there was a man in her room, even if he was a 'friend' and a 'lady boy', so she told the guy to shut up.

Actually, something very similar to this happened to me. I was in this girl's room when her boyfriend called, and I coughed very quietly. But he heard it over the phone and asked her who was in the room. Oh, no, wait a minute, I was actually banging her so it's not the same situation. Sorry.

[lingnoi34]

Personally I think that she made up the ladyboy part all along and she's been seeing another guy.

LN

[jonniebkk]

...on Friday evening we got in an argument on the phone & she hung up unexpectedly & shut off her phone. I was not able to reconnect to her until Saturday afternoon after I had to call one of her girlfriends to contact her via her Mother.

Falling for her phone power trip and loosing the phone call-back war, you're already toast. Don't know why most farang loverboys can't recognize this power play for what it is. I mean, there's so much poontang in this country, there's no reason to put up with one instance of insolence. I have never called back any Thai girl...and they always do Always adhere to the Golden Rule...Those that got the GOLD make the rules!!!

But really, I think you tink to mutt!!

[PeaceBlondie]

I am gay, and do not understand katoeys, even though some farang think I am practically married to one. Up here in the north, some gayboys start using the female toilet as early as Matayom 1, and some of them wear the girl's uniform in business college. As far as I can determine, they are considered culturally to be girls. They would not have any interest in raping your straight girlfriend.

I notice that one of the only posters who really is married to a ladyboy, has sounded the troll alert.

Now, as to the relationship of the couple in the opening post, it appears to be on shaky grounds due to a jealous boyfriend. Also, as has been mentioned, Thais do not lie as often as we accuse them of it. If they do not mean it as a lie, it is not a lie. Good grief, even I understand that much about the culture here.

[a2396]

Thank you all for what has been, for the most part, quite insightfull advice. No, I am NOT a troll and this is a true story. Yes, it is a personal & somewhat "soap opera" tale, but of significance to me to bounce around this forum, because this stuff is so common. I have seen similar behavior numerous times, from other ladies, much more blatant and obvious than this one. What is compounding is that often the person doing the lying has convinced themselves of his or her own version of the story, no matter what the facts may be. I am sure they could pass a lie detector test with ease.

In this particular situation, no I have not met the man in question or seen him. She told me he was a lady boy, but recently started "backtracking" about this and said only that she never saw him with a girlfriend. I doesn't matter to me what he is, other than he is a he and not a she and I did not think he should be in her room alone with her, with no others aparently around for the weekend. I will be backing off this & see how things "play out".

[jstumbo]

Wait a sec here, the reason you know this is a ladyboy is only because your girlfriend told you? You've never actually seen this ladyboy, dressed up in womens clothes, long hair, and with breast implants walking around town? Maybe this 'ladyboy' is actually a muscular, young, straight Thai dude, and you were lied to from the beginning.

No, it is her brother the ladyboy.

[meatgrowler]

If you had heard a girl in the background, would you assume she's a lesbian ?

Wishful thinking maybe......

I already knew he was a Lady Boy, since she had told me such before.

do her head in and bang the ladyman...

[hanibal7]

Would be a pisser if he had ham yai lol lol.

[Douggie Style]

I thought I would relay this story for the opinions of the wise “sages” on this forum & compare their advice to my own reactions to this. My current “darling” of some 6 months acquaintance is a 3rd year student nurse at a college about a 1.5 hr bus ride from where I live. Normally, she has come to visit me on the weekends & things had been progressing along rather well. Recently, she was assigned to work/study in another rural area further away. She live in a sort of dormitory close to the clinic, with several other nurses to a room. Two weeks ago, I had to go to BKK to renew my visa & was gone during the week. She was due to visit me on the weekend upon my return. However, on Friday evening we got in an argument on the phone & she hung up unexpectedly & shut off her phone. I was not able to reconnect to her until Saturday afternoon after I had to call one of her girlfriends to contact her via her Mother. The reason for all this was some confusion as to which phone I had taken to BKK, as she had SMS’d me to another number that I did not have with me. (A long story). When I finally talked to her Saturday evening, she was “up to her ears” in schoolwork (she said) and we only talked for a few minutes. There did not seem to be anything further amiss at that time. During this weekend, by the way, most of the students had gone home as they normally due every weekend. She stayed on to do homework, she says. I called her again about 1:30 PM Sunday and after a few seconds conversation heard a male’s voice say “hello” in the background. I recognized this voice as that of a Lady Boy, fellow student. She was in her room at this time. I also heard her briefly cover the phone mouthpiece, as if to tell him to be quiet. I asked her who was there and she said nobody, which I knew was a lie. A couple of days later, when I asked about this again, she admitted that in fact he was in her room, but they were just working on a homework assignment & eating lunch. She said I should not worry, because he is a Lady Boy. He is just a “friend”. I am not stupid enough to believe that some would not jump at the chance to bang some Farang's girlfriend, to serve their ego, if nothing else.

Since that incident, she has pretty much swept it under the carpet and acted like nothing unusual ever happened. My attitude is that I no longer trust her and anything she says is subject to suspicion. I hate to sound so paranoid, but similar incidents have happened with other women, with the final proof being they were basically being dishonest about their activities. Sorry to ramble on so long, but I have been “fuming” about this for some time now. Fire Away - ladies & gents.

I think you have completely misread it.

Ladyboy's identify themselves as ladies, it's completely against their being to suddenly jump back to acting like a man.

Speak to some in depth and find out for yourself.

Edited April 12, 2008 by Douggie Style

[Pepe']

If you had heard a girl in the background, would you assume she's a lesbian ?

Wishful thinking maybe......

I already knew he was a Lady Boy, since she had told me such before.

do her head in and bang the ladyman...

---------------------

Is a three way out of the question?

[Dakhar]

True, but it could be a lady boy lesbian.... complicated yes, but it could happen.

[submaniac]

To the OP,

I think that YOU know the situation better than anyone else here. You know your relationship with your girl, you know what she is like, and you know what she has said about the katoey. Everybody else's opinion is just conjecture based upon heresay. If YOU think that there is a lie, and if YOU think that there are trust issues, and if YOU are worried, I would go with your gut over what anyone else here has to say. It sounds like you are worried, and that just may be enough to tell yourself to move on. From my experience it just isn't worth it to stay in a relationship where you are in doubt.

I would also add that from what you have said, I would be worried too. You yourself say that the only basis you have that this guy is a ladyboy is from what she says, and her basis is only that she hasn't seen him with a girl. That would be a red flag for me.

[Dakhar]

To the OP,

I think that YOU know the situation better than anyone else here. You know your relationship with your girl, you know what she is like, and you know what she has said about the katoey. Everybody else's opinion is just conjecture based upon heresay. If YOU think that there is a lie, and if YOU think that there are trust issues, and if YOU are worried, I would go with your gut over what anyone else here has to say. It sounds like you are worried, and that just may be enough to tell yourself to move on. From my experience it just isn't worth it to stay in a relationship where you are in doubt.

I would also add that from what you have said, I would be worried too. You yourself say that the only basis you have that this guy is a ladyboy is from what she says, and her basis is only that she hasn't seen him with a girl. That would be a red flag for me.

I would thank her and move on to the next extremely beautiful Thai girl that Thailand has to offer. Thank You Thank You Thanks you

[LivinLOS]

I already knew he was a Lady Boy, since she had told me such before.

Wait a sec here, the reason you know this is a ladyboy is only because your girlfriend told you? You've never actually seen this ladyboy, dressed up in womens clothes, long hair, and with breast implants walking around town? Maybe this 'ladyboy' is actually a muscular, young, straight Thai dude, and you were lied to from the beginning.

Exactly what I pointed out and asked direct questions the OP wont answer..

I strongly suspect this 'LB' would be introduced as simply her brother if he was ever met !!

EDIT :: I now got to the OP's later post where he hasnt met the LB and now it seems hes not even an LB just doesnt have a GF.. So now the story is theres this single guy in my GF's bedroom and...

Dude, run dont walk !!

Edited April 13, 2008 by LivinLOS

[LivinLOS]

...on Friday evening we got in an argument on the phone & she hung up unexpectedly & shut off her phone. I was not able to reconnect to her until Saturday afternoon after I had to call one of her girlfriends to contact her via her Mother.

Falling for her phone power trip and loosing the phone call-back war, you're already toast. Don't know why most farang loverboys can't recognize this power play for what it is. I mean, there's so much poontang in this country, there's no reason to put up with one instance of insolence. I have never called back any Thai girl...and they always do Always adhere to the Golden Rule...Those that got the GOLD make the rules!!!

But really, I think you tink to mutt!!

Totally agree.. The whole calling her mate to call her mother to reach her.. I mean <deleted> ????

Talk about brush off..

[LivinLOS]

I am gay, and do not understand katoeys, even though some farang think I am practically married to one. Up here in the north, some gayboys start using the female toilet as early as Matayom 1, and some of them wear the girl's uniform in business college. As far as I can determine, they are considered culturally to be girls. They would not have any interest in raping your straight girlfriend.

I notice that one of the only posters who really is married to a ladyboy, has sounded the troll alert.

Now, as to the relationship of the couple in the opening post, it appears to be on shaky grounds due to a jealous boyfriend. Also, as has been mentioned, Thais do not lie as often as we accuse them of it. If they do not mean it as a lie, it is not a lie. Good grief, even I understand that much about the culture here.

Please tell me thats sarcasm ?? I just cant tell any more !!

If so sorry for taking the bait but if not... Ohh dear time for a ticket home or at least elsewhere..

[LivinLOS]

I thought I would relay this story for the opinions of the wise “sages” on this forum & compare their advice to my own reactions to this. My current “darling” of some 6 months acquaintance is a 3rd year student nurse at a college about a 1.5 hr bus ride from where I live. Normally, she has come to visit me on the weekends & things had been progressing along rather well. Recently, she was assigned to work/study in another rural area further away. She live in a sort of dormitory close to the clinic, with several other nurses to a room. Two weeks ago, I had to go to BKK to renew my visa & was gone during the week. She was due to visit me on the weekend upon my return. However, on Friday evening we got in an argument on the phone & she hung up unexpectedly & shut off her phone. I was not able to reconnect to her until Saturday afternoon after I had to call one of her girlfriends to contact her via her Mother. The reason for all this was some confusion as to which phone I had taken to BKK, as she had SMS’d me to another number that I did not have with me. (A long story). When I finally talked to her Saturday evening, she was “up to her ears” in schoolwork (she said) and we only talked for a few minutes. There did not seem to be anything further amiss at that time. During this weekend, by the way, most of the students had gone home as they normally due every weekend. She stayed on to do homework, she says. I called her again about 1:30 PM Sunday and after a few seconds conversation heard a male’s voice say “hello” in the background. I recognized this voice as that of a Lady Boy, fellow student. She was in her room at this time. I also heard her briefly cover the phone mouthpiece, as if to tell him to be quiet. I asked her who was there and she said nobody, which I knew was a lie. A couple of days later, when I asked about this again, she admitted that in fact he was in her room, but they were just working on a homework assignment & eating lunch. She said I should not worry, because he is a Lady Boy. He is just a “friend”. I am not stupid enough to believe that some would not jump at the chance to bang some Farang's girlfriend, to serve their ego, if nothing else.

Since that incident, she has pretty much swept it under the carpet and acted like nothing unusual ever happened. My attitude is that I no longer trust her and anything she says is subject to suspicion. I hate to sound so paranoid, but similar incidents have happened with other women, with the final proof being they were basically being dishonest about their activities. Sorry to ramble on so long, but I have been “fuming” about this for some time now. Fire Away - ladies & gents.

I think you have completely misread it.

Ladyboy's identify themselves as ladies, it's completely against their being to suddenly jump back to acting like a man.

Speak to some in depth and find out for yourself.

I see LB's going off with female punters, MF couples etc a fair few nites I go out.. Doesnt seem to stop thier drives (probably more so post op ??)

[macb]

There is a lot of advice that can come from posters on here: There are a lot of Thai ladies that have Ladyboys as friends, but at the end of the day it is up to you to make decisions about whether to continue or not in the relationship:

We are not involved in your relationship so to speak and can only comment on your typings, as they say there are two sides to every story:

Conclusion: There are plenty more fish in the sea if you decide to move on my friend Good luck

[PeaceBlondie]

I am gay, and do not understand katoeys, even though some farang think I am practically married to one. Up here in the north, some gayboys start using the female toilet as early as Matayom 1, and some of them wear the girl's uniform in business college. As far as I can determine, they are considered culturally to be girls. They would not have any interest in raping your straight girlfriend.

I notice that one of the only posters who really is married to a ladyboy, has sounded the troll alert.

Now, as to the relationship of the couple in the opening post, it appears to be on shaky grounds due to a jealous boyfriend. Also, as has been mentioned, Thais do not lie as often as we accuse them of it. If they do not mean it as a lie, it is not a lie. Good grief, even I understand that much about the culture here.

Please tell me thats sarcasm ?? I just cant tell any more !!

If so sorry for taking the bait but if not... Ohh dear time for a ticket home or at least elsewhere..

No, there is no sarcasm or irony there, no missing emoticons. It is hard to tell the players, even when you have a program that supposedly lists their roles.

Up here in the north, ladyboys are girls with extra appendages. Not all of them wish to have it cut off, but they play with girls from childhood, as one of the girls. They run around with girls, as one of the girls. Some who are labeled as katoyes or as ladyboys are in fact just very gay Thai men, who have gay sex partners, gay and straight men friends, and nonsexual girlfriends.

I was not being sarcastic or negative about Thais and lying, either. Big black lies are not even little white lies, sometimes.

I definitely think the OP should find a new girlfriend, regardless of whether his has a girlfriend or not.

[raro]

I am gay, and do not understand katoeys, even though some farang think I am practically married to one. Up here in the north, some gayboys start using the female toilet as early as Matayom 1, and some of them wear the girl's uniform in business college. As far as I can determine, they are considered culturally to be girls. They would not have any interest in raping your straight girlfriend.

I notice that one of the only posters who really is married to a ladyboy, has sounded the troll alert.

Now, as to the relationship of the couple in the opening post, it appears to be on shaky grounds due to a jealous boyfriend. Also, as has been mentioned, Thais do not lie as often as we accuse them of it. If they do not mean it as a lie, it is not a lie. Good grief, even I understand that much about the culture here.

Please tell me thats sarcasm ?? I just cant tell any more !!

If so sorry for taking the bait but if not... Ohh dear time for a ticket home or at least elsewhere..

Why should tht be sarcasm? That was possibly the first sensible post in this thread!

I also see that the jealousy of the OP is part of the problem. If it rally was a ladyboy (s)he would never ever think about having sex with a girl. Ladyboys actually like to hang out with girls and vice versa girls like to have them around as they are considered girls. I see no problem about this.

[a2396]

I am gay, and do not understand katoeys, even though some farang think I am practically married to one. Up here in the north, some gayboys start using the female toilet as early as Matayom 1, and some of them wear the girl's uniform in business college. As far as I can determine, they are considered culturally to be girls. They would not have any interest in raping your straight girlfriend.

I notice that one of the only posters who really is married to a ladyboy, has sounded the troll alert.

Now, as to the relationship of the couple in the opening post, it appears to be on shaky grounds due to a jealous boyfriend. Also, as has been mentioned, Thais do not lie as often as we accuse them of it. If they do not mean it as a lie, it is not a lie. Good grief, even I understand that much about the culture here.

Please tell me thats sarcasm ?? I just cant tell any more !!

If so sorry for taking the bait but if not... Ohh dear time for a ticket home or at least elsewhere..

Why should tht be sarcasm? That was possibly the first sensible post in this thread!

I also see that the jealousy of the OP is part of the problem. If it rally was a ladyboy (s)he would never ever think about having sex with a girl. Ladyboys actually like to hang out with girls and vice versa girls like to have them around as they are considered girls. I see no problem about this.

You're living on Fantasy Island. Some lady boys do in fact have sex with women. I know of one who just got married to a woman. They come in all sorts of "flavors". No doubt certain people of both sexes find lady boys "interesting" for whatever reason. I make no judgement about that. Whatever "floats their boat" as some say. The point is that a a "fairy tale" was told to be, that I should not worry because lady boys don't have sex with women - NONSENSE!