Those Freaking Hospital Pajama Bottoms

[Mobi]

Am I the only one?

Every time I stay in hospital they supply me with pajamas with a circular cord i.e. there are no ends to tie a knot – just one long cord.

I have never succeeded in making a tight knot in a cord with no ends, however hard I try. Within second’s it loosens up, and every time I get up I have to hold the pajamas to stop them from dangling around my ankles.

Is there a special way to achieve a tight, permanent knot?

Serious responses only please.

And while I’m on the subject of hospital garments, have you even been given one of those gowns to put on for surgery? All the ties are at the back. How the freaking heck are you supposed to tie knots behind you? Thais may be contortionists, but this ageing, creaking farang is certainly not. And then they tell you to remove your underwear, so you make a total botch up with the ties, end up parading your back side to one and all, trying to look as nonchalant as possible.

Is it just me?

[VTR1000]

Am I the only one?

Every time I stay in hospital they supply me with pajamas with a circular cord i.e. there are no ends to tie a knot – just one long cord.

I have never succeeded in making a tight knot in a cord with no ends, however hard I try. Within second’s it loosens up, and every time I get up I have to hold the pajamas to stop them from dangling around my ankles.

Is there a special way to achieve a tight, permanent knot?

Serious responses only please.

And while I’m on the subject of hospital garments, have you even been given one of those gowns to put on for surgery? All the ties are at the back. How the freaking heck are you supposed to tie knots behind you? Thais may be contortionists, but this ageing, creaking farang is certainly not. And then they tell you to remove your underwear, so you make a total botch up with the ties, end up parading your back side to one and all, trying to look as nonchalant as possible.

Is it just me?

Ha ha, I know what you're talking about. A few years ago I ended up in ICU in a hospital on Koh Samui following a bike smash. Stayed in that hospital for a while and then got transferred to hospital on the mainland near where I live. In the middle of the carpark at Seatran's Donsak terminal I had to get transferred from one ambulance to another. Of course, being 2 different hospitals they had 2 different types of pajamas and there in all my glory the nurses changed me, there, in the middle of the car park. Luckily I was semi-out of it on morphine at the time so couldn't complain.

[Crossy]

No it's not just you (and not just Thailand), you get those stupid circular jimjam cords in UK hospitals too (private patients only, National Health patients freeze in paper gowns if they don't bring their own). No it's not possible to tie a secure knot, there's not enough slack to get a decent tie done, makes then easier for nurses to remove though

If you put the gown on with the ties at the front it's far easier to tie, but you'll be parading a lot more than your hairy arse

On a slightly different (but related) note. I had the misfortune to stay in an Italian hospital, I had to provide my own fork and spoon (no knives allowed) and bog roll. Of course you don't find this out until nice hot food arrives with no eating implements (I borrowed a spoon from the chap in the next bed, luckily broken legs are not contagious) and a visit to the loo ends in horror

Edited May 30, 2008 by Crossy

[PeaceBlondie]

Mobi, you are asking quite a bit, that we only respond with serious replies.

Yes, pajamas in Thailand only come in two sizes: waist of 75 cm, and waist of 58 inches. There you are, semi-mobile (pardon the pun, Mobi), trying to walk to the toilet whilst hauling an IV stand alongside, perhaps with one or more limbs immobilized, and the pajamas fall to the floor. You cannot bend over, so you try to crouch down, nearly pulling out the IV...

There are many incentives for getting released form the hospital ASAP. I tried to get out of bed to adjust the angles of the bed...forget about it. They bring in some half-decent food and you eat in an uncomfortable position...Thai TV soap operas...same old BBC repeats of coming events and last hour's events.....get me out of here!

[Mobi]

Mobi, you are asking quite a bit, that we only respond with serious replies.

Yes, pajamas in Thailand only come in two sizes: waist of 75 cm, and waist of 58 inches. There you are, semi-mobile (pardon the pun, Mobi), trying to walk to the toilet whilst hauling an IV stand alongside, perhaps with one or more limbs immobilized, and the pajamas fall to the floor. You cannot bend over, so you try to crouch down, nearly pulling out the IV...

There are many incentives for getting released form the hospital ASAP. I tried to get out of bed to adjust the angles of the bed...forget about it. They bring in some half-decent food and you eat in an uncomfortable position...Thai TV soap operas...same old BBC repeats of coming events and last hour's events.....get me out of here!

You're absloutely right about hauling the IV stand with one hand and holding up my pajamas with the other - and then having to bend over to unplug the bloody IV machine to boot. If you don't succeed you never get to go home.

[Thaddeus]

Every time I stay in hospital they supply me with pajamas with a circular cord i.e. there are no ends to tie a knot – just one long cord.

I have never succeeded in making a tight knot in a cord with no ends, however hard I try. Within second’s it loosens up, and every time I get up I have to hold the pajamas to stop them from dangling around my ankles.

Is there a special way to achieve a tight, permanent knot?

Make a loop of what cord is available and then wrap an elastic band round it.

[Mobi]

Every time I stay in hospital they supply me with pajamas with a circular cord i.e. there are no ends to tie a knot – just one long cord.

I have never succeeded in making a tight knot in a cord with no ends, however hard I try. Within second's it loosens up, and every time I get up I have to hold the pajamas to stop them from dangling around my ankles.

Is there a special way to achieve a tight, permanent knot?

Make a loop of what cord is available and then wrap an elastic band round it.

There's only one thing harder than undoing rubber bands on plastic bags, and that's putting them there in the first place.

I guess I could always get a girl from the local noodle shop to come up and do the honours.

But what happens when I want to pee? I'll never get the bloody thing off in time

[Thaddeus]

I guess I could always get a girl from the local noodle shop to come up and do the honours.

But what happens when I want to pee? I'll never get the bloody thing off in time

It's a cruel world sometimes isn't it.

Ok then, old fashioned solution ignoring the cord........ safety pin, either pin the bottoms to the top, or just take up the slack in the bottoms with one, easy to do and quick to remove.

[astral]

You can take your own jim jams.............

[cluezo]

Hospital gowns were first designed by mental patients in a French hospital as a part of their therapy in 1897. They failed, of course, but the gowns remain. I agree --- they are the most insane bit of clothing I've ever worn. Just simply fuc_king insane!

[Thanyaburi Mac]

Every time I stay in hospital they supply me with pajamas with a circular cord i.e. there are no ends to tie a knot – just one long cord.

I have never succeeded in making a tight knot in a cord with no ends, however hard I try. Within second's it loosens up, and every time I get up I have to hold the pajamas to stop them from dangling around my ankles.

Is there a special way to achieve a tight, permanent knot?

Make a loop of what cord is available and then wrap an elastic band round it.

Nah, easy solution is just to roll over the top a wee bit and tie it just like you would your pha-ka-mah.  Works fine, forget the ropes, strings, etc.

Mac

[DaoDao]

Thanks for this marvellous post!

[PhilHarries]

Last time I was in a Thai hospital (Bumrungrad) I was on two separate IV drips, both electric pump type (not gravity feed) thus both on their own stands. Combine that with the <deleted>' pants and going to the bog was like herding cats. Then the nurses suggested I might like to take a shower . Are they on drugs or just some kind of S&M perverts course? After a bit of persuasion I got them to disconnect the drips and managed a halfway reasonable shower.

Actually the solution for the pants thing was to remove the belt from my jeans and use that. Looked a bit odd but a lot better than having the things wrapped around my ankles.

[cluezo]

Actually the solution for the pants thing was to remove the belt from my jeans and use that. Looked a bit odd but a lot better than having the things wrapped around my ankles.

HA! I did the exact same thing!!!

[Nampeung]

This is certainly not exclusive to Thai hospitals... just the same in UK hospitals. On my most recent visit I was mortified to be so attached to the wall that I needed a commode to poo and pee and to reach the sink to wash myself!!!

Do agree about the crazy pajamas and the X-Ray gown with the open back ... nutty or what ?

[Mobi]

Thanks for some useful advice.

The safety pin idea sounds good, but it could be painful if you're not careful.

The belt idea sounds brilliant - I will definitely try that next time.

As for experiences in carting IV stands etc into the toilet, the worse experience I ever had was when I had two IV stands and a catheter up my penis leading into a urine a bag, and they insisted that I take a shower!! - with all these attached. It was a bloody farce, to say nothing of the embarrassment of two nurses doing the necessary and trying to stop everything from getting tangled up

[ozzydom]

Every time I stay in hospital they supply me with pajamas with a circular cord i.e. there are no ends to tie a knot – just one long cord.

I have never succeeded in making a tight knot in a cord with no ends, however hard I try. Within second's it loosens up, and every time I get up I have to hold the pajamas to stop them from dangling around my ankles.

Is there a special way to achieve a tight, permanent knot?

Make a loop of what cord is available and then wrap an elastic band round it.

There's only one thing harder than undoing rubber bands on plastic bags, and that's putting them there in the first place.

I guess I could always get a girl from the local noodle shop to come up and do the honours.

But what happens when I want to pee? I'll never get the bloody thing off in time

Your supposed to put the rubber band on the cord ,not on old one-eye.

[teacup]

Next time go to Huahin “St paolo hospital” - no cord, no string, no rubber band! - easy to jump in PJ bottom!

[cluezo]

When I had Dengue I was staying at the Rayong Hospital in a private room - I had 5 visitors sitting around- I got up, pushed my IV drip thingy to the fridge to get a Splash. One hand pushing the drip thing, the other holding up my hopelessly loose PJ bottoms. To make a long story short, I chose the wrong hand to open the fridge and down went the bottoms! Exposing all - the full monty! In full view of my nervously giggling visitors which included 2 of my 13 years old female students. Since all the visitors were female, there was no mad rush to rescue me. I just said with a beet red face, was whoops! and tried to laugh it off as I bent down to pull up my PJs. I'll never forget that moment in my life. I now have a regular pair of pajamas packed away just in case I ever go to the hospital again. My god....