Office Rules

1. In any organization, there will always be one person who knows what is going on. This person must be fired.

2. a) Anyone can make a decision given enough facts.

A good manager can make a decision without enough facts.

c) A perfect manager can operate in perfect ignorance.

3. The one time in the day that you lean back and relax is the one time the boss walks in your office.

4. Teamwork is essential. It allows you to blame someone else.

5. An easily-understood, workable falsehood is more useful than a complex, incomprehensible truth.

6. If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, then you just don't understand the problem.

7. The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you've got it made.

8. Anything is possible if you don't know what you're talking about.

9. If you have a difficult task, give it to a lazy man - he will find an easier way to do it.