Young Thai Children

[Tyke]

Hi,

I have often wondered why young Thai children don't seem to have tantrums and crying bouts like western children. I have noticed this on public transport like buses. Not being a parent, I usually cringe at getting sat net to babies and small children in the west as I know they will sooner or later end up crying, shouting and screaming at some stage. But not in Thailand.

Have other people found the same thing and why is it? Is it the junk food that western kids eat, or are fed to shut them up, that does it? I have noticed in Thai friend's homes that the kids seem to be allowed to do whatever they want - sometimes that makes me cringe also - the mothers don't seem to discipline their kids like in the west. Is this the reason - that western kids end up fighting retaliatory battles with their parents? Can western parents learn from the Thai way on this?

[sbk]

Are you serious? you've never seen a Thai kid throw a tantrum? I see it all the time. Often with the toddler hitting his parent or grandparent.

[sierra01]

My 2 y/o neice throws tantrums, hits the parent and they just accept it. Not how I would react but there you are.

[Tyke]

My 2 y/o neice throws tantrums, hits the parent and they just accept it. Not how I would react but there you are.

Yes, I have seen Thai kids hit their mothers and grandmothers and they do nothing. This is something I also cannot understand - and this is what I meant about lack of disciplining by the parents. But I don't see the same level of bad behaviour in Thai kids in public, especially smaller kids (or even school kids), compared to the UK anyway. Am I mistaken?

[Boo]

Am I mistaken?

IMO, yes. It is an incorrect generalisation & one I often hear from people who possibly don't understand what is being said around them. For example, when disciplining her granddaughter in front of company, my mother in law will do it out of earshot of company but with a big smile on her face. What is being said though is a good old fashioned telling off with a threat of a bamboo spanking thrown in too but to outward appearances she is a kindly granny saying something to her grandchild. Thai style

"Oh aren't thai kids much better behaved than western ones". Well not in my expereince. Toddlers throw tantrums the world over, but thai kids are no better behaved than any other. The only difference I see in thailand is the parents ignore them more, which in itself causes problems or the real fear of a beating/bad smack (which you are not allowed to do in the west) prevents too many public dispays of bad behaviour (as used to do when I was a kid too btw ) but once in the home/around family back chatting, hitting, throwing & general bad behaviour are the norm, same as in most small kids who are pushing the boundaries to see how far they can go.

[silapin]

In my experience, many Thai parents have two methods for their under-fives (perhaps under-fours); totally give in and toddlers get exactly what they want, or smack them and be annoyed.

Above that age it changes though I must say.

[geovalin]

The question is not to know if the Thai babies have tantrums but to study if Western little ones are indeed as hysterical as you pretend.

I'm here since 20 years so I'm not sure but I guess it's not so terrible in Faranglands.

Next question for both is how parents deal with whims.

[apo]

Great observation at least someone is paying attention to the right things I must add!

there is just normally more “parenting” going on then in the “West” in that a child isn’t so isolated in older Asian cultures (like this part of Thai culture is still happening to some extent) and there for more mentally adjusted.

The more mentally stable someone is…. the less they need to “freak out”

So yes I totally agree with the original poster….

Less neurotic behavior over all in Thai children then in most of the Western kids I meet.

I can play with a Thai child who is a complete stranger much more easy than most Western kids or even kids say from next door in Malaysia….

Pretty simple folks… anyone who denies that is not paying attention or highly biased to the point of major denial.

Yes so they got the “kid thing” down here a lot better than most parts of the world in fact!

A child who grows up with a multi dimensional parenting possibility (lots of human relationships and connections with more than just mom as is normally in the West) is 9 times out of ten more mentally healthy…. no two ways about it….

Edited July 27, 2008 by apo