Doctor John Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 You should do a search and re-open the old threads about B/G letters to their conscripts !! This will enlighten you as to your current situation. Well at least it is another side to an all too familiar story !! <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Ned, Bargirl threads are banned on this site now. Even though this is turning into one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BIG SPUDS Posted November 10, 2004 Author Share Posted November 10, 2004 The visa she applied for in june was after i had met her, the first time she applied for visa. She was with me at that time.This was the first time she had applied for a visa so she had no passport. She has told me if i dont love her or believe she loves me to finish with her. She tells me that!! Can everyone honestly say their partner has never lied to them before? Ok it was quite a big lie, but if she is so scared what could she say?I have wrote so many times about the money, the fact she doesnt want much? but people still say she is after money. She ran out of money a couple of months ago and resorted to selling a gold necklace she had brought herself with money she had earnt in BKK. She did this so she had money to eat on the last week before i sent her money. She never told me this i had to ask her. She did this rather than ask for money or take money out of the bank. Yes the money is still there 9 months on. i have been to the bank with her. I have no doubt she loves me!! The Post was why is she scared of me? Yes i am in love but not blindly in love, do you not think after all the nasty posts/threads about BG's i am not extremely cautious! My GF has been rigourously grilled about everything, tested on what she has said in the past as my ex GF has made me in to an untrusting person. Like i said i was in that relationship before so i now expect it from everyone. My GF has always proved me wrong. Always proved she loved me. But like i said its not what this post is about. I will not argue with the anti BG posters anymore, I know my GF loves me and is not with someone. I know she doesnt work in a bar. I know she doesnt want my money. I just dont know why she is scared of me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alleypanda Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 I have no doubt she loves me!! The Post was why is she scared of me? Easy one, she doesn't want to go to england and the lied she told you too far to fix or say anything that make sense so she turn the table to you! I scared of you, I scared to love you so much and that love would hurt me in the future, I love you so much that I hate myself to be too deeply inlove because i afried that oneday you will stop loving me. Now you feel guilty, forget all the lies and also wanted to to prove your loving and care for her even more to comfort her feeling and not being afriad to trust... well, from a woman point of view. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chuchok Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 You can't tell me that everyone here with the most honest "spouse" in the fing world has not caught them telling porkies (even if very very very small) to save face. Then look at youself and ask the same question A long term resident of Hong kong told me many years ago " Asians only bring out the truth for special occasions!!!" I personally believe when it comes to face, the Thais fall behind Singaporians and Chinese...but only just. It is a very different culture. Maybe she was just scared etc.Who really knows? Maybe she needs somebody to hold her hand? Many Thai people are afraid of authority (Embassy)... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ijustwannateach Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 Ummm... I think she didn't tell you she needed money because she's got a few guys sending it to her- and when you did ask she had to tell you SOMEthing so that you could understand how she survived with no money, and that's when she brings up the necklace ploy (an old one). I don't think she's working in a bar- she's got a better gig as a kept mistress. But if she's not asking you for too much money, then she must be getting it somewhere else. Go over here expenses and income in detail sometime while you're here; I'm sure it won't add up. "Steven" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alternative View Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 I know she doesnt want my money. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Then why does she keep the 100 pounds you send her every month? Can you really not see that she's making a nice income for herself by taking money every month from you and half a dozen other idiots just like you? That's why she doesn't want to come and live with. In simple English, she doesn't love you a jot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IamMaiC Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 Man BIG SPUDS should have kept his mouth shut that she was a former bargirl. I don't know why she is scared of you I don't know the girl Sorry it's come to this BIG SPUDS. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doctor John Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 I know she doesnt want my money.Then why does she keep the 100 pounds you send her every month? Can you really not see that she's making a nice income for herself by taking money every month from you and half a dozen other idiots just like you? That's why she doesn't want to come and live with. In simple English, she doesn't love you a jot. Erco reincarnated ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doctor John Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 Man BIG SPUDS should have kept his mouth shut that she was a former bargirl. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Why ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IamMaiC Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 Man BIG SPUDS should have kept his mouth shut that she was a former bargirl. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Why ? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> He wouldn't get insulting post's about it. He's going through helll, If my wife when she was my GF said she was scared of me. Whew I don't know how I would feel or act. But IMHO the relationship is somewhat damaged then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Insight Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 Erco reincarnated ? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Thought you were Erco, TBH. After all, you joined well after he left - how do you hear about such things? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IamMaiC Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 Erco reincarnated ? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Thought you were Erco, TBH. After all, you joined well after he left - how do you hear about such things? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Ahhhh Insight can't you just write BANGKOK instead under your avatar. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doctor John Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 Erco reincarnated ? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Thought you were Erco, TBH. After all, you joined well after he left - how do you hear about such things? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Me Erco ? Haha............... Not a chance. Try the complete opposite to Erco, you will be on the right track. Yes Erco did go to Dave's club in pattaya, as indeed I also went, but we are not the same person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IamMaiC Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 Erco reincarnated ? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Thought you were Erco, TBH. After all, you joined well after he left - how do you hear about such things? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Me Erco ? Haha............... Not a chance. Try the complete opposite to Erco, you will be on the right track. Yes Erco did go to Dave's bar in pattaya, as indeed I also went, but we are not the same person. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Jing Jing?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doctor John Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 Worst woman I ever met for lies was my first wife who was English, who just pips my Mother for the title. Niether of whom where bargirls, although if my Mother had charged instead of giving it to every Tom , Dick and Harry for free while my Father was at work, she would have made a few quid, that's for sure. And the biggest liars I have met in Thailand where not Thai, fellow farangs leave them for dead. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boh Bpen Yang Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 I haven't read the whole thread. How long have you known her? How much time have you spent with her in person all totalled? Why do you send her money? Are you engaged to marry or some other commitment? Have you thought what would/might happen if the money stopped even for a short time? From personal experience if the money goes away and she doesn't you may have something (from a western p.o.v.) otherwise you can't be sure. This isn't a condemnation of her, just my observation of a different culture with a different view on values. In this culture your (or anyone elses') financial stability and ability to lift her in 'class standing' is usually more important than emotional attachment. In other words she may be more in love with what you can do for her rather than who you are for her (but in love none the less). She probably realizes that you will have a hard time accepting this and wishes to keep it hidden. If you can't accept this, you may be in for a broken heart. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richard W Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 Big Spuds, as your girlfriend worked in a bar for a year and a half, are any of her former colleagues now in the UK? The rub, of course, is that she may not have the address. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stroll Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 I have no doubt she loves me!! The Post was why is she scared of me?I will not argue with the anti BG posters anymore, I know my GF loves me and is not with someone. I know she doesnt work in a bar. I know she doesnt want my money. I just dont know why she is scared of me. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Whom are you trying to convince, this is the 35th time I see you posting this.If you still can't put her words over the phone into perspective, the 14.000 members here won't be able to explain them to your satisfaction, either. Yawnnnn.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meemiathai Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 I am getting really sick of the posts from the cynical idiots here. REALLY SICK! Can you just not post so that this thread won't get closed. You people think all people including BIG SPUDS are as stupid as yourselves? Some people like the teacher even insulted his GF! Please don't teach!! Oh my God! He is 30 yrs old FGS!!! It is his bloody choice whom to choose!! If you have nothing for his question, SIMPLY DON'T POST!!!!!! By the way, are there anyone here who hasn't ever lied? If yes, I'll jump out of my window. BIG SPUDS, I have now been married to my wife for almost 5 yrs. It is the BEST,BEST thing that had ever happened to me. But let me tell you, it had not been easy all the way through and it is NOT going to be in the future. When I first met her, she was quite a naughty person(smoking, drinking & going out a lot), well so was I, but I had this feeling that she was quite a nice person inside. And yes, she is an uneducated Isaan girl. So I asked if she would marry me the 3rd time we met because I didn't think long distance relation was a good idea.(I had just given up a what would look like a very nice relationship here in HK with a nurse. Me never married before.) We were very lucky that within 2/3 months we were together living in HK. She did not have much confidence in men for she had been badly treated by men before. Had been hospitalized before. For the first 1 or 2 years we went through a lot of emotions. And yes there were lies sometimes, due to various reasons. Some of which I could understand and some being understood after a couple of years. It takes some time for us to know/understand each other. I don't know if we could be considered successful or not, but I dare say both of us love each other more than anyone else in the world at this very moment. So that's a bit of my story, so as not to bore you. So why she fears you? I think it is not difficult to understand. She does not know you for sure.(Even how much she says she believes in you, you are still a stranger) And she has hope in you which she is afraid to lose. And if she is uneducated, she would be very very worried about the outside world. BS(not bullshit ), try to be patient, don't get upset easily, try more to think from her angle, most importantly don't listen to shit of those selfish people. Let them sit there and wait for their true love to fall onto them from the sky. If you want a good harvest, you have to work hard. Good luck! Best wishes! Go get her! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GuestHouse Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 I wish someone would send me £100 per week! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doctor John Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 I wish someone would send me £100 per week! <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Awwww, nobody loves you enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Insight Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 After reading all this, I'm glad I didn't meet my g/f in a bar. I met her in a brothel instead. Didn't really! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dugdig Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 Big Spuds, Have you found an answer yet as to why she is afraid of you? The posts here have covered the gamut from painting you and her as stupidly evil to describing you both as angelic innocents. I'm not surprised at this since it is unlikely that your original post of a few paragraphs..or even a post 10 times longer...could adequately describe your situation. You got the shotgun responses where most people seemed to think that what you have is what they have experience in their lives with their girlfriends. Their comments speak more about themselves than about you. I'm really wondering if you have picked anything out from this multitude of responses to help give you a new approach to your problem. Dugdig Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BIG SPUDS Posted November 10, 2004 Author Share Posted November 10, 2004 meemiathai - thanks alot i think you hit the nail right on the head. Thanks for sticking your neck out for me like that. Yes she is uneducated, is from issan and is scared of the outside world, she is afraid of flying, different food, not understanding anyone, (she speaks little english). She doesnt smoke, doesnt drink she goes out to see her mates once a week. She stays in her room watching TV playing with her new puppies and doing schoolwork. I know it sound unbelievable but its the truth. She is upfront about every one she has been with before and tells me that they all forgot her when they went home. I have asked what she would do if i stopped sending her money and she said she would have to find work somewhere. I have no doubts about her feelings or whereabouts. And yes i think we will end up getting married. She told me after her first visit to the embassy she did not like it and really wanted me to go with her next time, but i think i pushed her a bit too much to try and get the visa sooner. I am not upset about what my GF has done, i feel sorry for her that she felt she could not tell me sooner she was scared. And as for the the people that insult her and brand her with the typical bar girl hater mark. You dont know her!!! Simple. You can say what you like. My GF has shown me in more ways than one she is a nice caring person. she has no friends in the uk and only knows of one girl that has been. This was not intended as a BG thread, but just goes to show there are people out there that are way too good for bar girls, and people that heard it from a friend so its true that all BGs are scum, up to no good and just after money. Any problem that can not be answered simply must be she is evil because she is a former BG. I feel sorry for you shallow people. Thanks anyway for all those people that answered me with respect for me and my "BAR GIRL". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Totster Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 You've made some good posts in this thread BS, You are the only person here who knows her and therefore the only person able to judge her character, I still stand by my reply to your original post, I wish you all the best... Chok Dee totster Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BIG SPUDS Posted November 10, 2004 Author Share Posted November 10, 2004 cheers mate! appreciate it!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
medicinebox Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 Something doesn't necessarily have to be true, for a man to beleive in it. Ignorance is bliss. And for me, it's more a pity to see a goose go bare foot, than a woman cry. It takes big balls to break the chains of love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BIG SPUDS Posted November 10, 2004 Author Share Posted November 10, 2004 ?????????????????????????? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doctor John Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 And for me, it's more a pity to see a goose go bare foot, than a woman cry. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Good one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meom Posted November 10, 2004 Share Posted November 10, 2004 Spuds, the way you describe your gf she seems like a nice girl who might not really enjoy living in UK so much better you come to LOS instead as some other posters mentioned and see how things work-out. The 100 quid you send monthly ain't that much so even if your worst nightmare come true and it turn out she's a bg at least you don't have to pay next time you come around. With 25-30 f***s you're even so to speak so no need to worry to much if I were you. Anyway good luck; it's all part of life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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