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Posted

The Ant & the Grasshopper in 2008

Two Different Versions!

Two Different Morals!

OLD VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long,

Building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and

Dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is

Warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter,

So he dies out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE STORY:

Be responsible for yourself!

-------- ----------------------------------

MODERN VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long,

Building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and

Dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press

Conference and demands to know why the ant should be

Allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and

Starving.

CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of

The shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his

Comfortable home with a table filled with food. America is

Stunned by the sharp contrast.

How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this

Poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and

Everybody cries when they sing, 'It's Not Easy Being Green.'

Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the

Ant's' house where the news stations film the group

Singing, 'We shall overcome.' Jesse then has the

Group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's

Sake.

Nancy Pelosi & John Kerry exclaim in an interview with

Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the

Grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the

Ant to make him pay his fair share.

Hillary and Barack go on national television agreeing that

The plight of the grasshopper is the fault of George Bush.

Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity &

Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the

Summer.

The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number

Of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his

Retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the

Government.

Obama gets his old law firm to represent the grasshopper in

a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried

Before a panel of federal judges that Bill Clinton

Appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients.

The ant loses the case.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the

Last bits of the ant's food while the government house

He is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house,

Crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it.

The ant has disappeared in the snow.

The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident

And the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of

Spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.

MORAL OF THE STORY:

Be careful who you vote for...

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