Raising A Female Child In Male Dominated Thai Society

[dave9988]

Well, its not a secret that very few Thai males are faithful to their wife. You are hard pressed to find a soi in this country without a brothel on it. Its more or less expected and accepted that Thai men of status will have women on the side, if not another wife altogether.

Now, this leads to the issue of raising a female in this country. Chances are, she will end up marrying a Thai male, who will obviously be very likely to fall into the subset described above. If you were to raise her in the West, where this type of male behavior is not as accepted, it is more likely that her husband will be faithful to her.

Has anyone considered this aspect of raising a female child in Thailand? I do not have children yet, but I feel like I would much rather raise a male in this country than a female. And it is not my intention to turn this into a debate on the morality of men being unfaithful, but rather to examine the advantages and disadvantages of raising a a female child in this country.

And I would also like some comments on how women are treated in the workplace and potential glass ceilings which currently exist in Thailand as compared to the West. Perhaps, some of the advantages we men have here will be disadvantages to our daughters.

Edited December 22, 2008 by dave9988

[neverdie]

Well, its not a secret that very few Thai males are faithful to their wife. You are hard pressed to find a soi in this country without a brothel on it. Its more or less expected and accepted that Thai men of status will have women on the side, if not another wife altogether.

Now, this leads to the issue of raising a female in this country. Chances are, she will end up marrying a Thai male, who will obviously be very likely to fall into the subset described above. If you were to raise her in the West, where this type of male behavior is not as accepted, it is more likely that her husband will be faithful to her.

Has anyone considered this aspect of raising a female child in Thailand? I do not have children yet, but I feel like I would much rather raise a male in this country than a female. And it is not my intention to turn this into a debate on the morality of men being unfaithful, but rather to examine the advantages and disadvantages of raising a a female child in this country.

And I would also like some comments on how women are treated in the workplace and potential glass ceilings which currently exist in Thailand as compared to the West. Perhaps, some of the advantages we men have here will be disadvantages to our daughters.

Talk about opening a can of worms....I can't wait to see some of the responses on this one

[myauq]

Well, its not a secret that very few Thai males are faithful to their wife. You are hard pressed to find a soi in this country without a brothel on it. Its more or less expected and accepted that Thai men of status will have women on the side, if not another wife altogether.

Now, this leads to the issue of raising a female in this country. Chances are, she will end up marrying a Thai male, who will obviously be very likely to fall into the subset described above. If you were to raise her in the West, where this type of male behavior is not as accepted, it is more likely that her husband will be faithful to her.

Has anyone considered this aspect of raising a female child in Thailand? I do not have children yet, but I feel like I would much rather raise a male in this country than a female. And it is not my intention to turn this into a debate on the morality of men being unfaithful, but rather to examine the advantages and disadvantages of raising a a female child in this country.

And I would also like some comments on how women are treated in the workplace and potential glass ceilings which currently exist in Thailand as compared to the West. Perhaps, some of the advantages we men have here will be disadvantages to our daughters.

i think the bigger issue is whether you should raise your child in thailand at all.

if you raise a boy in thailand and he turns out the way you characterise thai men in the above, is that acceptable?

personally i think it would be better to raise either a boy or girl in farangland, where there is much more equality and respect amongst the sexes, among many other things. your boy will become much more rounded, and more secure in his masculinity if he is raised in a society which respects women and other people generally. but if he's gay, then that might be another story

[sunreader]

Well, its not a secret that very few Thai males are faithful to their wife. You are hard pressed to find a soi in this country without a brothel on it. Its more or less expected and accepted that Thai men of status will have women on the side, if not another wife altogether.

Wow! is it really that bad?...I had no idea!...then again maybe "bad" is the wrong word, maybe its just a cultural difference and not "bad" at all?

[dave9988]

Well, its not a secret that very few Thai males are faithful to their wife. You are hard pressed to find a soi in this country without a brothel on it. Its more or less expected and accepted that Thai men of status will have women on the side, if not another wife altogether.

Wow! is it really that bad?...I had no idea!...then again maybe "bad" is the wrong word, maybe its just a cultural difference and not "bad" at all?

So it would not bother you to learn that your son in law sleeps with prostitutes on a regular basis and risks passing on HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases to your daughter?

Morality aside there are health risks to this behavior

[MidoriApple]

uhmmmmm.... very few faithful Thai men.. I think this saying is a little exaggerate...

the faithful level compare to the foreigners, i dont think it is much difference...

If I were to raise a female kid, I will raise her to be self-dependence..

She will not need to get married if it is not worth to do...

What if she will need to have couple, I dont mind if she will be a lesbian....

Well, female is much more faithful than male as I have seen...

[DaveTheThaiGuy]

We don't sleep with a prostitue on a regular basis you jack0ffs.

[Carib]

Another " Sigh" topic.

By all means let children be raised western style, we are soooo much better.

[neverdie]

We don't sleep with a prostitue on a regular basis you jack0ffs.

Good point Davethethaiguy....as he points out, he doesnt sleep with a prostitute, he just jacks off ....that way you can save ur money and buy more whiskey!

[neverdie]

Another " Sigh" topic.

By all means let children be raised western style, we are soooo much better.

I don't think the OP was trying to say that western ers are soooo much better, I think he was stating the obvious, in most western countries, knock shops are not as common as they are here & the cost is probably a lot higher. If one was to run some sort of survey in most foriegn countries they MIGHT find that western men have to 'hook up' with local sheilas at pubs and hotels and any other dingy dive where shielas like to get plastered before they give it out for free. SAME SAME but different!

Perhaps I'm wrong, perhaps its the workplace where all the infidelity occurrs, but where-ever it is, it must be somewhere because divorce rates are sky high in some western societies.

I guess the OP doesnt like to think about his child, or his child to be, to be subjected to this form of human behaviour, but theres only so much he can do.

[buffcoat]

If your daughter marries a decent man he will be faithful, if she gets a scumbag sadly she will suffer.

Having observed the exponential growth in STD's amongst young adults in the UK and the very heavy divorce rates I am far from convinced that a Western future is a better one.

The brothel on every corner is a stereotype, the sex trade in Europe is alive and well and at least as pervasive as that in Thailand,it merely operates in a slightly less obvious way.

You are narrowing the field too much if you base your future domicile purely on perceived levels of marital fidelity.

[dave9988]

My stance is simply that this is a male dominated society thus there will be more advantages here for my son than my daughter. Perhaps you disagree that this a male dominated society as DaveTheThaiGuy so eloquently has done. I want as many opinions as possible. Are there as high a percent of Thai female CEOs here as there are in the West? My observation is that Thai women are asked to fill the sort of 1950's American ideal of a housewife: to take care of the kids, pay the bills, and don't ask her husband why he has to work so late every night. Please correct me though.

[dave9988]

The brothel on every corner is a stereotype, the sex trade in Europe is alive and well and at least as pervasive as that in Thailand,it merely operates in a slightly less obvious way.

How is it a stereotype? Its reality. Its the reason that many of the farang are here in the first place.

Edited December 22, 2008 by dave9988

[aehn]

Well, its not a secret that very few Thai males are faithful to their wife. You are hard pressed to find a soi in this country without a brothel on it. Its more or less expected and accepted that Thai men of status will have women on the side, if not another wife altogether.

Now, this leads to the issue of raising a female in this country. Chances are, she will end up marrying a Thai male, who will obviously be very likely to fall into the subset described above. If you were to raise her in the West, where this type of male behavior is not as accepted, it is more likely that her husband will be faithful to her.

Has anyone considered this aspect of raising a female child in Thailand? I do not have children yet, but I feel like I would much rather raise a male in this country than a female. And it is not my intention to turn this into a debate on the morality of men being unfaithful, but rather to examine the advantages and disadvantages of raising a a female child in this country.

And I would also like some comments on how women are treated in the workplace and potential glass ceilings which currently exist in Thailand as compared to the West. Perhaps, some of the advantages we men have here will be disadvantages to our daughters.

People like you, who are so brainwashed with arbitrary naive ideas about gender and power, makes me aware of how easily people just buy into any sort of bs

If you prefer a place were females are being treated as divine goddess and simply can never ever do anything wrong, and are about 70% more likely to be unfaithful to their husband, than the opposite, i suggest you move to Sweden, as some people prefer to call it, the feminazi Utopia of the world. I am happy i do not have to deal with the insanity over there anymore.

Edited December 22, 2008 by aehn

[dave9988]

People like you, who are so brainwashed with arbitrary naive ideas about gender and power, makes me aware of how easily people just buy into any sort of bs

If you prefer a place were females are being treated as divine goddess and simply can never ever do anything wrong, and are about 70% more likely to be unfaithful to their husband, than the opposite, i suggest you move to Sweden, as some people prefer to call it, the feminazi Utopia of the world. I am happy i do not have to deal with the insanity over there anymore.

Can you please expound on the mathematics used to arrive at such a precise figure?

[TJAN]

We don't sleep with a prostitue on a regular basis you jack0ffs.

Good point Davethethaiguy....as he points out, he doesnt sleep with a prostitute, he just jacks off ....that way you can save ur money and buy more whiskey!

You people never get tired of your stupid remarks.

[aehn]

People like you, who are so brainwashed with arbitrary naive ideas about gender and power, makes me aware of how easily people just buy into any sort of bs

If you prefer a place were females are being treated as divine goddess and simply can never ever do anything wrong, and are about 70% more likely to be unfaithful to their husband, than the opposite, i suggest you move to Sweden, as some people prefer to call it, the feminazi Utopia of the world. I am happy i do not have to deal with the insanity over there anymore.

Can you please expound on the mathematics used to arrive at such a precise figure?

"About" means, that it is not exact, can´t remember were i saw those figures, but it seems highly plausible that there is a truth in those figures, not claiming to have any "scientific" evidence of this though.

Plus, the status feminism has reached in certain european, and to certain degree also in the US, statistics and certain "truths" are no longer needed to be questioned, they are simply taken for granted. For example, the wage gap issue, and the domestic violence discourse.

Edited December 22, 2008 by aehn

[dave9988]

"About" means, that it is not exact, can´t remember were i saw those figures, but it seems highly plausible that there is a truth in those figures, not claiming to have any "scientific" evidence of this though.

So why are Swedish women 70% more likely to be unfaithful than their husbands?

[haybilly]

We don't sleep with a prostitue on a regular basis you jack0ffs.

Good point Davethethaiguy....as he points out, he doesnt sleep with a prostitute, he just jacks off ....that way you can save ur money and buy more whiskey!

You people never get tired of your stupid remarks.

I'm not replying to any post in particular but with all the stereotyping, insults,flaming etc...plus the references to items and agenda which we are not 'supposed' to discuss--where are the mods-they jump on any interesting discussion and stamp 'closed' on it--yet here, where we have all the makings of a 'closeable' post--where the f.. are they--SBK, where are you?

[sunreader]

People like you, who are so brainwashed with arbitrary naive ideas about gender and power, makes me aware of how easily people just buy into any sort of bs

If you prefer a place were females are being treated as divine goddess and simply can never ever do anything wrong, and are about 70% more likely to be unfaithful to their husband, than the opposite, i suggest you move to Sweden, as some people prefer to call it, the feminazi Utopia of the world. I am happy i do not have to deal with the insanity over there anymore.

Can you please expound on the mathematics used to arrive at such a precise figure?

Your hardly one to talk about "precision" Dave!...there were so many generalizations in your OP it was really quite laughable nonsense!....

[dave9988]

uhmmmmm.... very few faithful Thai men.. I think this saying is a little exaggerate...

the faithful level compare to the foreigners, i dont think it is much difference...

I agree that foreign males living in Thailand are probably not that much more likely to be faithful than Thai males.

[aehn]

"About" means, that it is not exact, can´t remember were i saw those figures, but it seems highly plausible that there is a truth in those figures, not claiming to have any "scientific" evidence of this though.

So why are Swedish women 70% more likely to be unfaithful than their husbands?

There are several reasons for this, i suggest you study some feminism, not only in theory, but how it is practiced in for example Sweden, who to my knokwledge is the most extreme country so far, try to get into the popular culture of Sweden, and get a better understanding about such issues as male bashing, accepting misandry as a sign of "gender equality" etc, and you will get a better idea of what you now perceive as a noble thing.

[dave9988]

Your hardly one to talk about "precision" Dave!...there were so many generalizations in your OP it was really quite laughable nonsense!....

Convincing argument.

[dave9988]

"About" means, that it is not exact, can´t remember were i saw those figures, but it seems highly plausible that there is a truth in those figures, not claiming to have any "scientific" evidence of this though.

So why are Swedish women 70% more likely to be unfaithful than their husbands?

There are several reasons for this, i suggest you study some feminism, not only in theory, but how it is practiced in for example Sweden, who to my knokwledge is the most extreme country so far, try to get into the popular culture of Sweden, and get a better understanding about such issues as male bashing, accepting misandry as a sign of "gender equality" etc, and you will get a better idea of what you now perceive as a noble thing.

Ah, male bashing. It seems that quite a few Thai Visa'ers have fallen victim to that.

[aehn]

"About" means, that it is not exact, can´t remember were i saw those figures, but it seems highly plausible that there is a truth in those figures, not claiming to have any "scientific" evidence of this though.

So why are Swedish women 70% more likely to be unfaithful than their husbands?

There are several reasons for this, i suggest you study some feminism, not only in theory, but how it is practiced in for example Sweden, who to my knokwledge is the most extreme country so far, try to get into the popular culture of Sweden, and get a better understanding about such issues as male bashing, accepting misandry as a sign of "gender equality" etc, and you will get a better idea of what you now perceive as a noble thing.

Ah, male bashing. It seems that quite a few Thai Visa'ers have fallen victim to that.

Yes, and your point is?

Are you one of these "gender equality" people who would call a guy a loser and don´t hesitate to laugh, when he gets his life trashed by a female, and scream patriarchy and oppression when a female gets ripped off and played by a guy?

I hope not.

[dave9988]

Are you one of these "gender equality" people who would call a guy a loser and don´t hesitate to laugh, when he gets his life trashed by a female, and scream patriarchy and oppression when a female gets ripped off and played by a guy?

I hope not.

No, of course not. Perhaps the West favors women. If that is the case, than it would still seem that I would be better off raising my daughter in Sweden than in Thailand.

And I think there are bigger issues at play here than infidelity. We still have not touched on potential glass ceilings in Thai society and the perceived role of the Thai woman, whether they are treated as equals at home and in the work place, and the types of messages that will be subtly drived into their subconscious.

And no, I do not fault any man for choosing to live in a male dominated society. I am simply asking what are the disadvantages I can expect my daughter to face in such a society.

Thank you for participating.

Edited December 22, 2008 by dave9988

[WillieHardigan]

Boo will close this now as she is married to a thai man.

Next post down

[Boo]

hmm seems we have a clairvoyant in our midst. Must be one esp as he opnly has one post but seems to not only claim to know what I am going to do before I even think of doing it (if at all) & seems to know my marital status too. Hmm how odd.

[mrtoad]

hmm seems we have a clairvoyant in our midst. Must be one esp as he opnly has one post but seems to not only claim to know what I am going to do before I even think of doing it (if at all) & seems to know my marital status too. Hmm how odd.

It's probably another reincarnation, there seems to be a number of them about these days.

[Boo]

Sorry to disappoint the op but western men have just as much opportunity to cheat & do so, as Thai men. In both Thailand & other countries. It is only the mans own character that will stop him. If you have a daughter I would suggest raising her to have self respect & the ability to look after herself so that if she meets a man (Thai or otherwise) she has the strength & ability to walk away should they cheat or treat her badly. The problem most women have is being unable to walk away due to financial limits & having kids or believing they deserve to be treated badly (lack of confidence). IME a women with that kind of strength & resolve will not usually meet men who would treat her with that kind of disregard & disrespect in the first place. I kwow I never have & yes, my husband is Thai & is a wonderful & great father too

As for glass ceilings & opportunities for women in Thailand in general, IMO the country has a long way to go, so raising a strong, opinionated & educated daughter & teaching her not to be controlled or limited by these ancient prejudices might be a good thing for Thailand in the long run, esp if she uses that learning to improve things.