Pablo H Posted January 9, 2005 Share Posted January 9, 2005 Now when I go back I buy a few beers or a couple bottles of Lao Khao, its just a few quid, nothing to go crazy about. On one occassion her brother did ask me to buy beer, through my g/f, I said no and then asked him to buy me some beer, he just laughed and has never asked me again. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Oh wow, you saved 50 Baht,............... what a star you are. Yea, you sure showed those Thai guys that Farangs will not be used as money machines, I bet they where really impressed with you. Still, I expect that you work for 4000 Baht a month and are expected to row the boat out when you visit the family, life is hard sometimes. She should dump you immediately and get a guy with some compassion. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> A guy with compassion, someone like you eh John? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Backpack_thailand Posted January 10, 2005 Share Posted January 10, 2005 You lot are an embarrasment! Wives, girlfriends, mia-noys - yet you moan about being shown a lack of respect! Get a life! You need to stop being told by your freeloading GF's that this is "the Thai way". If someone was shouting in my ear "buy beer, buy beer" they would politely be told to kiss my assets, in Thai! "Joop toot pom dee-gwa!" No wonder so many foreigners here get stiffed, with you lot as examples of "typical" farangs..... Learn the "Thai way", but also educate your family on the "farang way". Give respect and earn respect, they go hand-in-hand! It's not an "Issan thing". Issan people are the friendliest I have come across in my time here. My wife is from Issan and from day one I was firm in my convictions that I'm not an ATM, been down that road before! My in-laws are Spot On and havenever asked me for a single Baht, and my father in law earns less than 100 Baht a day! Give respect, earn respect - got it...? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jackr Posted January 10, 2005 Share Posted January 10, 2005 Apart from my contribution of 'run', this is the best contribution to this thread. Put your foot down man! It may be different here but does that mean you have to take one up the ass for them? #### um! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mango-Guy Posted January 17, 2005 Share Posted January 17, 2005 HUH! How much would all these beers cost? Are the Issan boys being "freeloaders" or just getting you to gain some village-cred by showing what a big earning farang you really are?! Are they sitting around afterwards laughing at how they fleeced you, or saying what a great guy you are to buy them a few rounds?! Get with the program fellas, money talks in Thailand and you know it, we're not down at the local where someone is shirking their round. It reminds me of the stories of backpackers who don't want to done out of ten baht by the guy who loads their pack onto a bus. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meadish_sweetball Posted January 17, 2005 Share Posted January 17, 2005 Using your money and influence wisely to gain face is one thing, but you dont gain any face whatsoever by listening to some village idiot who tells you to buy him beer. Cultural differences or not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
srisatch Posted January 18, 2005 Share Posted January 18, 2005 Sorry if this topic title offends people, but it sums up my feelings about various members of my Gf's family!Recently, I went up to Issan to meet my GF's family for the 1st time. I had a few previous Issan GFs, so was quite used to the big difference in live/facilities etc between Issan and the big city But this time was a bit of a shock. Although her immediate family were great, there seemed to be a large number of 'hangers-on', (cousins etc), who immediately latched onto me as the gullible farang. Unfortunately, (I think due to too family members procreating with direct family members over the years), many of these cousins were rather mentally slow. We sat outside her parents' house and drank some beer, and I smiled at everyone. I continued to smile (although with difficulty), as cousin after cousin shouted 'buy beer, buy beer' into my ear. This went on almost continually for many hours from maybe 6 different cousins, all who were totally drunk! (I could not understand their very slurred Issan...) To top it off, I discovered that it was my money being used to buy all the beer for them (my GF asked for some money from me, but then gave it to the cousins...) The next day, at 7 in the morning, the whole process started again with these drunken guys shouting for beer!! Afterwards, I told my GF that 'Thai kee nok' was absolutely the best description of these guys, and that no way was she to use my money to fund their beer-binges. I have no problem with my GF and her parents, but I will have a problem in a month or so when we go for an Issan wedding (only the blessing, not signing the tabian since I'm still married in the UK!) I don't want these family members at the wedding, or I want a wedding without alcohol (that would be a first for Issan!!). Any advice how I can get this message across successfully? My ideal procedure would be to tell all these guys to F*** Off in a very loud voice, but I suspect this is not the best tactic!! (BTW, this is the girl whom I previously was seeing as a 'Mia Noi'. When the last GF found this out, she offered me to stay with her and make the Mia Noi more legitimate! Nightmare thoughts about the last GF chopping off my assets whilst I slept caused me to move out....) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> For some reason-probably Jamesons-this has been on my mind...cannot assume family complete tossers, nor girl-true..presume you have some knowledge of Issan--hence first lao free wedding etc... If you are going into this properly all that sage advice about budgets..where to stash the booze..right on....but if you are more in Sin Sod is de rigeur... for face and practicalities...true you/ well she should negotiate its return,,, that is normal...but some show of GOLD-preferable- or Goods is absolutely called for. On the other hand ....what on earth are you doing with these people? Girl too. Sounds like well the other side of the tracks to me..and they are her FAMILY! Plenty of good people in Issan as elsewhere.....But you have probably bought her hubbbie a few stubbies already. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simon43 Posted January 18, 2005 Author Share Posted January 18, 2005 But you have probably bought her hubbbie a few stubbies already. Actually no! Her husband was killed in a motorbike accident 4 years ago, and she was left to bring up their daughter. I realise that I am taking a risk with this relationship, bearing in mind all the horror stories aired on this forum! I left a very 'decent' Thai lady who adored me, so that I could be with this new girl. And I have read 'Private Dancer' and I did use PIs to initially check her out. I know all about her past (not actually that 'bad'!), and I cannot change what has happened previously. I'm hoping this girl will fall within the 1% (my estimate!) of farang-TBG marriages which are successful, and I'm happy to take this risk. There is little financial fall-out for me if it all goes wrong, although there will certainly be an emotional fallout. Her distant family may well be Thai kee nok, but I'm marrying this girl, not her cousins. And her direct family seem fine. But it's simply a matter of being firm from the outset. Oh well, into the valley of death.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pablo H Posted January 18, 2005 Share Posted January 18, 2005 And the best of luck to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Backpack_thailand Posted January 18, 2005 Share Posted January 18, 2005 I realise that I am taking a risk with this relationship, bearing in mind all the horror stories aired on this forum! I left a very 'decent' Thai lady who adored me, so that I could be with this new girl. And I have read 'Private Dancer' and I did use PIs to initially check her out. I know all about her past (not actually that 'bad'!), and I cannot change what has happened previously. I'm hoping this girl will fall within the 1% (my estimate!) of farang-TBG marriages which are successful, and I'm happy to take this risk. There is little financial fall-out for me if it all goes wrong, although there will certainly be an emotional fallout. Her distant family may well be Thai kee nok, but I'm marrying this girl, not her cousins. And her direct family seem fine. But it's simply a matter of being firm from the outset. Oh well, into the valley of death.... Perfect attitude, at least your going eyes wide open. If it does go t*ts up at least you won't be as devestated as some. I genuinely hope your situation works out, however if it was me and a bar girl I'd run for the hills..... ...been down that road before, much poorer for the experience. My wife now (6 years) is from Issan, not a bar girl and she is absolutely wonderful and has given me a beautiful baby son just this last year! Keep on rockin' in the free world! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doctor John Posted January 18, 2005 Share Posted January 18, 2005 I realise that I am taking a risk with this relationship, bearing in mind all the horror stories aired on this forum! I left a very 'decent' Thai lady who adored me, so that I could be with this new girl. And I have read 'Private Dancer' <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Hey Simon it's one of your kids writing this right? Seems like a guy with your track record of leaving people that adore you would be a high risk for a Thai woman, how long will it be before you leave another one that adores you? She should get everything that she can get out of you before you move on and leave her life in tatters. Jeeez, and you guys wonder why Thai women are out to get what they can while they can!! Move on and give the woman a break, she will thank you for it eventually. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stroll Posted January 18, 2005 Share Posted January 18, 2005 I always advise my friends to stay away from the 'gentlemen' who populate the girlie bars, make empty promises and more often than not left a string of broken hearts behind whereever they've been before. Thais should not shy the expense of a private investigator to find out the personal history of a potential partner and ensure there are no skeletons in the cupboard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doctor John Posted January 18, 2005 Share Posted January 18, 2005 I always advise my friends to stay away from the 'gentlemen' who populate the girlie bars, make empty promises and more often than not left a string of broken hearts behind whereever they've been before. Thais should not shy the expense of a private investigator to find out the personal history of a potential partner and ensure there are no skeletons in the cupboard. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Agreed, many Thai women I know have been duped into a relationship with a farang full of empty promises, she then wastes a few years of her life till he finds another girl to play with. I think a Thai woman with any sense gets a house and land and some money before embarking on a long term gig with some guy that frequents beer bars, they are too high risk to waste time on otherwise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
srisatch Posted January 18, 2005 Share Posted January 18, 2005 But you have probably bought her hubbbie a few stubbies already. Actually no! Her husband was killed in a motorbike accident 4 years ago, and she was left to bring up their daughter. I realise that I am taking a risk with this relationship, bearing in mind all the horror stories aired on this forum! I left a very 'decent' Thai lady who adored me, so that I could be with this new girl. And I have read 'Private Dancer' and I did use PIs to initially check her out. I know all about her past (not actually that 'bad'!), and I cannot change what has happened previously. I'm hoping this girl will fall within the 1% (my estimate!) of farang-TBG marriages which are successful, and I'm happy to take this risk. There is little financial fall-out for me if it all goes wrong, although there will certainly be an emotional fallout. Her distant family may well be Thai kee nok, but I'm marrying this girl, not her cousins. And her direct family seem fine. But it's simply a matter of being firm from the outset. Oh well, into the valley of death.... <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Well I am not putting money on at anything less than 50-1 I am a really cynical B**. Seen the death Certificate have you? I have had one or two of those..popped out the daisies with surprising speed when farang appeared,, Private Dancer is a load of S*** particularly as Leather tries to make out 'Nothing to Do With ME...Ha ha It is just what other guys have said...Common Sense....If she is a good F££££ by all means go with it, eyes open, and wallet etc......But if so why does everyone have to hang on for the ride...well except for the thrills when you fall off! Oh,,,Being firm from the outset...Is that a reference to body parts or a message from your great Grandfather? Sorry...you just have my sympathy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simon43 Posted January 19, 2005 Author Share Posted January 19, 2005 Yep - understand all the cynics amongst you Thailand is littered with failed farang-BG relationships. I sincerely hope this relationship does not go down that path. Call us both back in a few years and I'll let you know how it's all going Simon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simon43 Posted January 19, 2005 Author Share Posted January 19, 2005 Oops! Forgot to add that I havn't seen the death certifcate of her deceased husband. But I've seen the very bad physical scarring on my 'wife' who was riding pillion.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
srisatch Posted January 19, 2005 Share Posted January 19, 2005 Oops! Forgot to add that I havn't seen the death certifcate of her deceased husband. But I've seen the very bad physical scarring on my 'wife' who was riding pillion.... <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Come on.. You know what we are all saying. You have chosen to be ripped off for the sake of....And you started all this moaning about the fact you could not say Boo to a bunch of lao freeloaders....As the lady said get ready for all those visits on the motosai to the ATM........in fact why not give them all Kasikorn ATM Cards?....Yeah good luck to you and yeah we all know families lost people in the madness of Thai roads and yeah we all got scars and burns from bikes. My heart bis bleeding. Apart from the fact that she is a scarred widow with, I am sure a lovely child, but an unspeakable, drunk, beggaring family..she must have something else going for her?? We would, well I speak for myself, like to know.....I ain't seen any references in this thread to her charm, intelligence, beauty, wealth, honesty, modesty,generosity youth even....Ain't I horrible. Its lunchtime want beer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chonabot Posted January 19, 2005 Share Posted January 19, 2005 Oops! Forgot to add that I havn't seen the death certifcate of her deceased husband. But I've seen the very bad physical scarring on my 'wife' who was riding pillion.... <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Come on.. You know what we are all saying. You have chosen to be ripped off for the sake of....And you started all this moaning about the fact you could not say Boo to a bunch of lao freeloaders....As the lady said get ready for all those visits on the motosai to the ATM........in fact why not give them all Kasikorn ATM Cards?....Yeah good luck to you and yeah we all know families lost people in the madness of Thai roads and yeah we all got scars and burns from bikes. My heart bis bleeding. Apart from the fact that she is a scarred widow with, I am sure a lovely child, but an unspeakable, drunk, beggaring family..she must have something else going for her?? We would, well I speak for myself, like to know.....I ain't seen any references in this thread to her charm, intelligence, beauty, wealth, honesty, modesty,generosity youth even....Ain't I horrible. Its lunchtime want beer <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Blimey , despite the lack of a sugar coating , the chap asks a valid question Si....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
srisatch Posted January 19, 2005 Share Posted January 19, 2005 Oops! Forgot to add that I havn't seen the death certifcate of her deceased husband. But I've seen the very bad physical scarring on my 'wife' who was riding pillion.... <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Come on.. You know what we are all saying. You have chosen to be ripped off for the sake of....And you started all this moaning about the fact you could not say Boo to a bunch of lao freeloaders....As the lady said get ready for all those visits on the motosai to the ATM........in fact why not give them all Kasikorn ATM Cards?....Yeah good luck to you and yeah we all know families lost people in the madness of Thai roads and yeah we all got scars and burns from bikes. My heart bis bleeding. Apart from the fact that she is a scarred widow with, I am sure a lovely child, but an unspeakable, drunk, beggaring family..she must have something else going for her?? We would, well I speak for myself, like to know.....I ain't seen any references in this thread to her charm, intelligence, beauty, wealth, honesty, modesty,generosity youth even....Ain't I horrible. Its lunchtime I want beer <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Blimey , despite the lack of a sugar coating , the chap asks a valid question Si....... <{POST_SNAPBACK}> But the girl is a big honey..No!? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simon43 Posted January 19, 2005 Author Share Posted January 19, 2005 All good questions! I find her charming, intelligent, beautiful, not wealthy, honest, modest and generous. So she scores on most points. But also she is hard-working, not greedy, not a teenager, religious, strong in dealing with others etc etc. As for me, I'm not such a cynical guy as you lot:) No wonder all you do is moan at each other on this forum!! Me? I'm very happy with my relationship with her. And since you lot are so cynical about the success of this relationship, I'm happy to wager 10,000 baht against each of you who says it will fail. Since you are so sure of the outcome, a little wager is no risk for you, is it??? :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Backpack_thailand Posted January 19, 2005 Share Posted January 19, 2005 Thailand is littered with failed farang-BG relationships. You've got to ask yourself a question - Would you set up home in Europe with an ex hooker...? Of course you wouldn't! I bet all the guys who live here with these girls don't tell their parents what their "wives" used to do for a living! Hypocracy Rules! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simon43 Posted January 19, 2005 Author Share Posted January 19, 2005 Would you set up home in Europe with an ex hooker...? The assumption that I would not set up home with her is incorrect. It would depend upon the circumstances. Everyone makes decisions in their life that maybe they regret at a later date. But you cannot change the past, and I prefer to look towards the future, (having suitably considered her past actions etc). For this particular woman, I doubt very much that she will run off with my money. Not giving personal details, but she is physically unwell (nothing at all related to her previous work). I'm sure that an important issue in her mind is to find someone who will look after her and her daughter. I'm also aware that for many Thai women, the importance of husband loyalty, financial security etc etc, is considered more important than physical looks, 'love' etc. I don't give a f*** what anyone thinks about me or my wife. It's not important to me:) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kreon Posted January 19, 2005 Share Posted January 19, 2005 Yep - understand all the cynics amongst you Thailand is littered with failed farang-BG relationships. I sincerely hope this relationship does not go down that path. is that why divorce rates are over 50% in the western world get real mate, you're talking crap, relationships fail all over the world Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simon43 Posted January 19, 2005 Author Share Posted January 19, 2005 get real mate, you're talking crap, relationships fail all over the world Did I ever say that they didn't??? Ask my ex-wife in England. She can confirm this Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
srisatch Posted January 19, 2005 Share Posted January 19, 2005 All good questions! I find her charming, intelligent, beautiful, not wealthy, honest, modest and generous. So she scores on most points. But also she is hard-working, not greedy, not a teenager, religious, strong in dealing with others etc etc.As for me, I'm not such a cynical guy as you lot:) No wonder all you do is moan at each other on this forum!! Me? I'm very happy with my relationship with her. And since you lot are so cynical about the success of this relationship, I'm happy to wager 10,000 baht against each of you who says it will fail. Since you are so sure of the outcome, a little wager is no risk for you, is it??? :) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> I can't let this go..I must be turning into a bloody terrier. So If I read you right she is poor, dishonest, immodest and mean. In what does her intelligence. charm and beauty lie..apart from the fact...and I guess we have many of us had these-but we did not marry them- a good f+++ Of course if she makes you feel she WANTS YOU and none other she has got to be smart...oh and now she is not only a scarred widow but an invalid. Give some money to the Pattaya Orphanage..or if its personal just her daughter. If there was another horse in the race I might take the bet..or bet on him...not you Somchai..stay in hiding..the game is not won. This ain't cynical bitching. Guys are taking time out of their lives to try and tell you that you are being an a+++++e Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
srisatch Posted January 19, 2005 Share Posted January 19, 2005 All good questions! I find her charming, intelligent, beautiful, not wealthy, honest, modest and generous. So she scores on most points. But also she is hard-working, not greedy, not a teenager, religious, strong in dealing with others etc etc.As for me, I'm not such a cynical guy as you lot:) No wonder all you do is moan at each other on this forum!! Me? I'm very happy with my relationship with her. And since you lot are so cynical about the success of this relationship, I'm happy to wager 10,000 baht against each of you who says it will fail. Since you are so sure of the outcome, a little wager is no risk for you, is it??? :) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> I can't let this go..I must be turning into a bloody terrier. So If I read you right she is poor, dishonest, immodest and mean. In what does her intelligence. charm and beauty lie..apart from the fact...and I guess we have many of us had these-but we did not marry them- a good f+++ Of course if she makes you feel she WANTS YOU and none other she has got to be smart...oh and now she is not only a scarred widow but an invalid. Give some money to the Pattaya Orphanage..or if its personal just her daughter. If there was another horse in the race I might take the bet..or bet on him...not you Somchai..stay in hiding..the game is not won. This ain't cynical bitching. Guys are taking time out of their lives to try and tell you that you are being an a+++++e <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Oh I see. I have not read you right. Blimey an ex BG who is all of that. Did I miss the bit about current hard work? How old is she, how old the child? Clearly you don't need me to send you any more wool to pull over what must pass for your eyes. Something about lust is in the eye of the beholder should follow or is it just Love Is Blind. My Lao Princess. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simon43 Posted January 19, 2005 Author Share Posted January 19, 2005 Hi srisatch, sounds like you lead a happy life If you are ever in need of some human compassion, don't come calling me Sorry! Gotta go and vacuum the wife! Hanging around on this website is soooo boring and repetitive.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
srisatch Posted January 19, 2005 Share Posted January 19, 2005 Hi srisatch, sounds like you lead a happy life If you are ever in need of some human compassion, don't come calling meSorry! Gotta go and vacuum the wife! Hanging around on this website is soooo boring and repetitive.... <{POST_SNAPBACK}> At 19.15? I thought we all did this for fun.....If what she is getting from you and you from her is human compassion I certainly don't want it. Why did you start this thread? It started if I recall with those drunks and beggars and then I think people started to not only feel sorry for you but genuinely worried. You think that is boring?..Tham Jai as they say. Let's leave it na? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bkkmadness Posted January 19, 2005 Share Posted January 19, 2005 Yet another thread that goes off topic into a discussion about relationships with bargirls, and how they cant be good wives and how everybody is getting ripped off etc. except of course by the posters that all have it perfect with their gfs and wives, so smartly chosen by themselves coz they are all so clued up on Thai women. How ######ed up in the head are you lot. Answer the guys question, or leave it alone. What he sees in the girl, why he is with her and all the rest of it is not your business. Have the women out here really twisted your head that badly? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chonabot Posted January 20, 2005 Share Posted January 20, 2005 (edited) Thailand is littered with failed farang-BG relationships. You've got to ask yourself a question - Would you set up home in Europe with an ex hooker...? Of course you wouldn't! I bet all the guys who live here with these girls don't tell their parents what their "wives" used to do for a living! Hypocracy Rules! <{POST_SNAPBACK}> A tired and tedious cliche , most of the lads who do p4p in Los wouldn't dream of visiting the skanky ho's back home , let alone marrying them. This is not because of loss of face , it's because most of them are hideous old bags. If you can't see the difference my friend , it is you that is the hypocrite here. Edited January 20, 2005 by chonabot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simon43 Posted January 20, 2005 Author Share Posted January 20, 2005 ...and not one of you cynics has taken up my 10,000 baht wager that this relationship will fail Seems that you are not so sure of your comments after all But Bkkmadness is right. This thread has gone off-topic. Let's agree to differ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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