Degree

[Tas]

For those of you who are married, were married, or are contemplating marriage under the assumption that men need (or ought) to be trained for marriage…

TWO YEAR DEGREE COURSE

A new two-year degree is being offered at the University that many of you should be interested in:

Becoming a Real Man. That’s right, in just six mini-semesters, you, too, can be a real man as well as earn an MA degree. (Male Arts)

Please take a moment to look over the program outline.

FIRST YEAR

Autumn Schedule:

MEN 101: Combating Stupidity

MEN 102: You, Too, Can Do Housework

MEN 103: PMS-Learn To Keep Your Mouth Shut

MEN 104: We Do Not Want Sleazy under things for Christmas

Winter Schedule:

MEN 110: Wonderful Laundry Techniques

MEN 111: Understanding the Female Response to Getting in at 4am

MEN 112: Parenting: It Doesn’t End with Conception

EAT 100: Get a Life, Learn to Cook

EAT 101: Get a Life, Learn to Cook II

ECON 001A: What’s hers is Hers

Spring Schedule:

MEN 120: How NOT to Act like an arse when you’re Wrong

MEN 121: Understanding Your Incompetence

MEN 122: YOU, The Weaker Sex

MEN 123: Reasons to Give Flowers

ECON 001C: What Was Yours is Hers

SECOND YEAR

Autumn Schedule:

SEX 101: You CAN Fall Asleep without It

SEX 102: Morning Dilemma: If It’s Awake, Take a Shower

SEX 103: How to Stay Awake After Sex

MEN 201: How To Put the Toilet Seat Down

(Elective)

(See Electives Below)

Winter Schedule:

MEN 210: The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency

MEN 211: How to Not Act Younger than Your Children

MEN 212: You, Too, Can be a Designated Driver

MEN 213: Honest, You Don’t Look Like Brad Pitt

MEN 230A: Her Birthdays and Anniversaries are Important

Spring Schedule:

MEN 220: Omitting %&*!@ from Your Vocabulary (Pass/Fail Only)

MEN 221: Fluffing the Blanket after Farting Is NOT Necessary

MEN 222: Real Men Ask For Directions

MEN 223: Thirty Minutes of Begging is NOT Considered Foreplay

MEN 230B: Her Birthdays and Anniversaries are Important II

Course Electives:

EAT 102: Cooking with Tofu

EAT 103: Utilization of Eating Utensils

EAT 103: Burping and Belching Discreetly

MEN 231: Mothers-In-Law

MEN 232: Appear to Be Listening

MEN 233: Just Say “Yes, Dear”

ECON 001C: Cheaper to Keep Her

Just a thought for all the women out there.

MENtal Illness

MENstrual cramps

MENtal breakdown

MENopause

GUYnocologist (poetic spelling)

Ever notice how all of women’s problems start with men?

Send this to all women you know (and men with a sense of humour) and brighten up their day!!…. and when we have real trouble, it’s a HISterectomy

Edited February 1, 2005 by Tas