george Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 Tourist population swells with injection of American seamen USS New Orleans in Phuket First port of call: US Military personel change their dollars to baht before venturing onto the island. The massive 208-meter stealth ship the USS New Orleans docked in Phuket. On radar screens, the ship only appears as a 50-meter vessel. PHUKET: -- The unprecedented arrival in Phuket of five US Navy ships at the same time has given a boost to the island’s tourism industry and local economy with about 5,700 US sailors and marines enjoying R&R on Phuket over the next few days. The USS Boxer has returned to Phuket while on an extended tour of duty that will have kept the 2,982 crew members away from home for nine months. The Boxer is joined by the USS Comstock with a crew of 857; the USS Gridley destroyer with a crew of 380; the USS Thatch guided missile destroyer with a crew of 217 and the massive 208-meter stealth ship the USS New Orleans amphibious transport vessel with just over 1,000 crew members, about 10% of whom are female officers. Benefiting greatly from the steady stream of crew members venturing onto Phuket island are numerous taxi and mini-van operators waiting dockside to take visitors to entertainment areas such as Patong. According to one of the crew members who spoke with the Gazette, taxi drivers are charging an extortionate 2,000 baht per trip – about 1,400 baht more than the price local expats would consider a reasonable fare. Food and souvenir vendors near the dock at the deep sea port are also charging high prices for their wares. Small bottles of water that usually sell for about ten baht each in convenience stores are sold on the dockside for 20 baht each. USS New Orleans Commander Scott Davies said it was the ship’s first visit to Phuket. Mr Davies explained that the USS New Orleans has expanded medical capabilities and larger flight decks specifically designed for humanitarian missions and that the ship’s crew are well practiced in such scenarios from practice drills in the US. When asked why Phuket was chosen as a port of call for all five ships, Mr Davies explained that Phuket was the destination of choice among crew members due to the island’s diverse options in entertainment. That sentiment was confirmed by other crew members who said that they always receive a warm welcome from the locals in Phuket. -- Phuket Gazette 2009-06-26 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kevbap Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 Tourist population swells with injection of American seamen USS New Orleans in Phuket . yes im sure american seaman does swell the 'population' hehehehe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnGotti Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 the prostitutes must be thrilled to get a night off from the oldies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
isanb Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 Or could it be : Tourist population swells with injection of American semen USS New Orleans in Phuket Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pagallim Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 Or as the local Kathoeys would say, pass me another American seaman, this one's split! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saintofsilence Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 (edited) Or it could BE : Bar ladies stomachs swell with injection of American semen USS New Orleans in Phuket Edited June 26, 2009 by saintofsilence Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imaneggspurt Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 Cracking topic title, seamen injection, love it ,..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Datsun240Z Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 Or could it be :Tourist population swells with injection of American semen USS New Orleans in Phuket Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
captnhoy Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 a cunning linguist for sure! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JUDAS Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 Georgie Porgie, Puddin' and Pie, Kissed the girls and made them cry, When the boys came out to play Georgie Porgie ran away Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brahmburgers Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 hope the sea men are careful where they inject their semen, or we might see men drowning with their feet in cemen(t). One downside, Americans are compulsary tippers, so no one should be surprised when workers at Phuket tourist venues get to expecting tips from all farang. It could get as bad as the States where, if you don't tip generously, you're treated like dirt by staff members - who feel genuinely jilted. Largely for such reasons, Americans tip automatically, with little concern for quality of service. They all know exactly who is supposed to get tipped (waitresses, valets, girls for hire, cabs, and such) - whereas the vast majority of service workers don't have a hope of getting tips (janitors, street sweepers, chimney sweeps, carpenters, night watchmen, etc.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lancelot Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 When I read "Injection of American seamen..." I knew all bets were off 555+ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saintofsilence Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 A young woman in New York was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. She went down to the docks and was about to leap into the frigid water when a handsome young sailor saw her tottering on the edge of the pier, crying. He took pity on her and said, "Look, you have so much to live for. I'm off to Europe in the morning, and if you like, I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take good care of you and bring you food every day." Moving closer, he slipped his arm around her shoulder and added, "I'll keep you happy, and you'll keep me happy." The girl nodded yes. After all, what did she have to lose? Perhaps a fresh start in Europe would give her life new meaning. That night, the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a lifeboat. From then on, every night he brought her three sandwiches and a piece of fruit, and they made passionate love until dawn. Three weeks later, during a routine inspection, she was discovered by the captain. "What are you doing here?" the captain asked. "I have an arrangement with one of the sailors," she explained. "I get food and a trip to Europe, and he's screwing me." "He certainly is," the captain said. "This is the Staten Island Ferry." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigSnake Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 No doubt they will leave some little Seamen(semen) behind when they ship out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
donna Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 classic title. but i have to say, when i lived in Phuket, the injection of seamen was always a welcome sight. very easy on the eyes, and usually such gentlemen too. always made a change from the crusties. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shotime Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 They are gentlemen, and they know how to have a good time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PoorSucker Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 Also good business for all tattoo artists, massage etc. Everybody has a happy ending. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunholidaysun1 Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 Bar girls scream in delight with " An injection of American Seaman " to the area. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PoorSucker Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 Tourist population swells with injection of American seamen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jontom Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 I was disscussing this mater with a lady in Patpong, she told me that her naval base also was filled with discharged seamen.............. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
grandslam Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 I wunder why they always cum here And not to forget, Roger di Cabin Boy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purplehaze Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 I wonder how long it will take before the the bar brawls start? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Datsun240Z Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sriracha john Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 (edited) A large amount of non-semen Marines are present in these Phuket Gazette numbers. Also, it's a misnomer to refer to these embarked Marines as "crew members" as they are not. The USS Boxer has returned to Phuket while on an extended tour of duty that will have kept the 2,982 crew members away from home for nine months. USS Boxer - amphibious assault ship Complement: 73 officers, 1,009 enlisted Troops: 1,894 Marines The Boxer is joined by the USS Comstock with a crew of 857 USS Comstock - dock landing ship Complement: 30 officers, 327 enlisted Troops: 500 Marines the USS New Orleans amphibious transport vessel with just over 1,000 crew members USS New Orleans Complement: 80 officers, 638 enlisted the rest of the "over 1,000" presumably embarked Marines Edited June 26, 2009 by sriracha john Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jackr Posted June 26, 2009 Share Posted June 26, 2009 Benefiting greatly from the steady stream of crew members venturing onto Phuket island are numerous taxi and mini-van operators waiting dockside to take visitors to entertainment areas such as Patong. According to one of the crew members who spoke with the Gazette, taxi drivers are charging an extortionate 2,000 baht per trip – about 1,400 baht more than the price local expats would consider a reasonable fare. So typical. What a bunch of they are down there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WeeGB Posted June 27, 2009 Share Posted June 27, 2009 Absolutely hilarious! This deserves to be "topic title of the year". Thanks george for giving me the first laugh of the day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jungian Posted June 27, 2009 Share Posted June 27, 2009 Who ever thought of the title for this was NOT thinking. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thai at Heart Posted June 27, 2009 Share Posted June 27, 2009 Fnar Fnar...... Finbarr Saunders couldn't come up with a better headline. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
webfact Posted June 27, 2009 Share Posted June 27, 2009 I have recommended that headline to be added... Funniest Newspaper Headlines Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brahmburgers Posted June 27, 2009 Share Posted June 27, 2009 "Tourist Population Swells With Injection Of American Seamen" If the "Injection of American Seaman" is a thinly veiled reference to semen, then does that infer the 'Tourist Population' part of the headline refers to a woman's privates? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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