Psychiatric Patient Advice Need For Lady Friend

[Maizefarmer]

Considering she is a Lao national, she runs the risk of being deported as a public danger.

...... I missed that - yes, indeed - youre quite right, that is exactly what will happen: she will be taken into protective custody and then sent back home. I haven't a clue what the system is like in Laos, but I couldn't imagine it been any better than Thailand.

[Gobbledoc]

Thanks so much for your replies, been a great help. You don’t need to be an expert to know she is an emotional mess and can not think rationally or hold a rational conversation. Sure the icing on the cake in my opinion is me moving on, finnaly fed up of trying to help and just getting a slap in the face, I have been trying so long to help her. I really feel for her, and I also believe she is very easy target for those want to take advantage of her.

This has been going on for a long time, she is 100% a compulsive liar and believes her own lies and gets violent when challenged. I am trying to get her to family in Laos, but they are also a bit funny when it comes to medical help. Last time I visited them her brother (cousin technically) who had fallen off a 2nd story roof had been unconscious for just over 2 days, their answer was to lay him down and put herbs on his forehead. He appeared to be in a comer to me, so I convinced them to get medical help, he ended up in Udon Thani and made a pretty good recovery after a month. It was all about ghost to them. I don’t care about bills for stuff like that, but I doubt she will get any western medicine up there. But I think being in a caring environment might do her a world of good. If it was an answer I would finance a small biz for her, but I don't think lack of motivation is the issue here.

1 - I was her legal husband ----- I am not, although sometimes she thinks we are, tells people our wedding date!!!!

2 - She had gone totally 'nuts' and was a danger to herself/others. Yes this is true.

3 - I was paying money----- I am happy to for her to get help to a point if it was going to work, well to a point, don’t feel like putting more money after bad. She is in denial and thinks the rest of the world is nuts. Well in Thailand she may have a point !, but she fails to see it is she and every thing is against her.

Edited July 9, 2009 by Gobbledoc

[simon43]

Harsh as it might sound, my good advice to you is to move on. I'm no doctor, but her 'symptoms' strike a chord with my ex's Bipolar illness, living in a fantasy world etc. It may be that your departure will help to bring her to her senses, (although I doubt it). But if you try to help her, to care for her, I personally think that you will end up emotionally stressed, financially poorer, and with no improvement in your partner....

It was always advised to me by mental health professionals that people like this need to reach rock bottom before they will accept that they have a problem, and will accept help/advice from others. So I think she still has some way to go....

Good luck in whatever decision you make

Simon

[Gobbledoc]

Thanks folks so much. Deep down I know this relationship is a total dead end, but I really care for here well being. I honestly think it’s a waste of time for me to continue to help like this. Best to spend a few grand on making sure all bills and leases in her name are cleared up and buy tickets home for her and run to swampy !!!!!! I can’t help but think she is a human lady with feelings and I know that needs help, but help is not near. I feel sad for abandoning her when I know there are solutions in the western world, but ,,,,,TIT,,,,,. I am in a 3rd world place with a “unique” culture, where living in denial is the norm, and questioning anything without tea money is way to hard. Time for me to move on and never look back, so no chance I feel regret or sorrow.

I have had enough of LOS Bull $H!T anyway, I needed an excuses to move on to normality.

Honestly, thanks so much for the replies, they really did help me. So many great ideas. I don't want her locked up in a loonie toon place.

PS, I think I will replace a Vitium B pill she takes for some reason with a ProZac !!!!!! Give her 6 months suply !

[Datsun240Z]

You are/where in a relationship with her? Maybe she has been raped in the past?

[Harcourt]

Some good advice from the Western perspective....what I have to suggest is a bit out of left field, but it may just be the best thing for her;

Get a Lao shaman to perform an excorcism.

This could have a placebo-type effect, and may also help to get the family involved so that your transition out of the situation is smoother.

Good on you for not just cutting and running.

[Livinginexile]

Thanks folks so much. Deep down I know this relationship is a total dead end, but I really care for here well being. I honestly think it’s a waste of time for me to continue to help like this. Best to spend a few grand on making sure all bills and leases in her name are cleared up and buy tickets home for her and run to swampy !!!!!! I can’t help but think she is a human lady with feelings and I know that needs help, but help is not near. I feel sad for abandoning her when I know there are solutions in the western world, but ,,,,,TIT,,,,,. I am in a 3rd world place with a “unique” culture, where living in denial is the norm, and questioning anything without tea money is way to hard. Time for me to move on and never look back, so no chance I feel regret or sorrow.

I have had enough of LOS Bull $H!T anyway, I needed an excuses to move on to normality.

Honestly, thanks so much for the replies, they really did help me. So many great ideas. I don't want her locked up in a loonie toon place.

PS, I think I will replace a Vitium B pill she takes for some reason with a ProZac !!!!!! Give her 6 months suply !

Yes I think it is time for you to leave.

You can't sve her from herself, in this case only she can do that.

Good luck to you my friend, you have tried your best and now it's time to think about number 1.

Vietnam would be a good place to start a new life.

[ThaiBasil]

Thanks folks so much. Deep down I know this relationship is a total dead end, but I really care for here well being. I honestly think it's a waste of time for me to continue to help like this. Best to spend a few grand on making sure all bills and leases in her name are cleared up and buy tickets home for her and run to swampy !!!!!! I can't help but think she is a human lady with feelings and I know that needs help, but help is not near. I feel sad for abandoning her when I know there are solutions in the western world, but ,,,,,TIT,,,,,. I am in a 3rd world place with a "unique" culture, where living in denial is the norm, and questioning anything without tea money is way to hard. Time for me to move on and never look back, so no chance I feel regret or sorrow.

I have had enough of LOS Bull $H!T anyway, I needed an excuses to move on to normality.

Honestly, thanks so much for the replies, they really did help me. So many great ideas. I don't want her locked up in a loonie toon place.

PS, I think I will replace a Vitium B pill she takes for some reason with a ProZac !!!!!! Give her 6 months suply !

So this means you are leaving to ......... where? back home? another asian country? and you just leave her or send her home? hope things will be better for the both of you ......

[scorecard]

The only one that can make a true determination of her mental status is a qualified psychiatrist....and that's a psychiatrist, NOT a pharmacist, who are unqualified to determine if medication is appropriate in the first place.

I wasn't recommending a pharmacist for treatment, but just as some place to go for advice. Many Thai doctors do not speak English well enough to understand the OP's problem.

I wish people would think a little more before making posts.

Given the unfortunately circumstances the OP shared, it's obvious that you wouldn't go to a local shop front doctor. (Personally I would never go to such a clinic and my Thai family would never even suggest this, because there's a fair chance it's not even a qualified doctor.)

In fact You would seek out a specialist or perhaps as a first step go to a hospital who could give you the name and address of the appropriate specialist. These specialist mostly do speak English. As a quick example, if you go to the government hospital at Sri Racha you will find a number of board certified specialists who all speak advanced to very advanced English and they are well capable of detailed lengthy discussion about their area of speciality in English.

Some pharmacists (especially if they have graduated from the Pharmacy Faculty of Chiang Mai University) would probably be quite knowledgeable about available medications but they are not qualified (and they would readily confirm this) to do a systematic diagnosis of the case in point.

Suggesting to go to a pharmacist is not appropriate.

[WildChilli]

I have a lady friend form Laos living with who is going nuts. She is a compulsive liar, she is the exact definition and suicidal. She has attacked me several times with large kitchen knives, I mean real attempts on me, she is totally irrational, and is inflicting self harm to her self, drinking quantities of 'Vim' bathroom cleaner, trying to cut her self etc…..

I can not handle this anymore, but she clearly need medical help. My question is what is available for her? She is dangerously jealous, and that over powers her thinking. I don't want her locked up in a hospital for Psychiatric patients, I care for her good health and help still, and defiantly don't want her to top her self. She is in Bangkok.

Apart from Run, I would love some suggestions.

lol run Would be my first instint ..... having delt with a psykotic woman like that before

turned out she had a overative Thyroid ( information can be forund on the net regarding thyroid's )

none the less i found my self in a relationship with a thai/vietnam girl for almost 1 year before i kicked her out

she was driving me nuts dayly calls while i was at work calls late at nite lies

( not on the street shes got her own house she is very well off she have more assets than i could dream off owning my self )

from your decription say of your lady's behavior .... id say get her checked for a overative Thyroid

even though that might only be part of her problem getting the medication for that might help some

..... or even having the thyroid removed by surgery

unless you have been with her for a very long time ( YEARS OF HAPPY TIMES TOGETHER )

I WOULD STILL SUGEST RUN FOR YOUR LIFE

BEFORE SHE HURT YOU OR HER SELF