Is She Cheating On Me?

[Lost in LOS]

I agree with Geekfreaklover. I think she is losing interest in you or the relationship.

Why wouldn't she just break it off completely? Because Thai's try to avoid conflict.

Yep, that is it exactly, she is no longer interested or most likely, has a new boyfriend, or at least one that is in town now. Thai's dont like conflict so its "mai phen rai"

she will call when the sponsor that is paying more leaves town, sorry dude, but most likely the truth

[PS3]

How quick people here have labelled her as a cheating lying hooker without even knowing the true situation. And you people claim to know the Thai Psyche.

Isnt it totally reasonable to suggest that she has realised that it was getting expensive to call him on mobile rates and decided to let him call her? after all she takes the call every week. It is not like she is avoiding him, there could be many reasons why the phone situation has changed, she is the only one that can tell him why.

I used to call my now wife all the time, she rang me only if she had something important to tell me. We have been married for two years now and living in Oz.

The OP is going through that fragile period after first meeting a girl in another country and is now sitting at home worrying about what she is doing.....we have all been there and done that.

OP when you first enter a long distance relationship you have to do so with a great amount of trust, If you lose that trust you lose the relationship. Think of your situation, you have come to public forum to ask a bunch of strangers to give advise on a personal issue. Ask yourself! Who should you be trusting first?

Remember every relationship requires work and sacrifice....if you are prepared to ditch her on the advice of a bunch of strangers, maybe you need to look at your own commitment values first.

You did say you love her right?

I just asked my wife about this and her first response was......maybe she not talk on the phone so much because she has nothing to talk about, nothing new happen and it is boring to talk about the same thing everyday.....better to talk once a week and save money too.

- Not true. Many of us say we think she have another man, That dont mean she's a lying hooker as you claim we all say. We did say we think she's cheating on him. OP said she never asked for money, so no reason for us to label her as bad girl.

- He already told her he's worried that she not answer calls from him, or call him back. Still she not change / improve.

- Why she not answer his calls? Free for her.

- OP used his instinct, then he posted to get others opinion before breaking off. When tirak change a lot for a long time = no smoke without fire.

- OP ready to ditch her before posting. Even he loves her - he know "something is going on".

- Love must be 2 ways. Here the love is now only 1 way. She shown that 1 month already.

The start says it all - Is she cheating on me? When you feel something is wrong for a long time, is usually is.

How long should he wait? 6 months? 1 year?

And in the mean time, he's the one getting more hurt and sleepless nights. While she probably has moved to "greener fields".

A good lady with real love, dont change over night unless there is someone more interesting in the picture.

If she mad at him for something, is it real love to punish him for 1 month?

Most Thais do not want to go/move other country. Thais are not like that. Remember Thai Rak Thai. For them, their country is number 1, and the place they want to live. Family always comes first, and to be abroad and far from family is unberable for most of them. Thais are freezing cold when the temp drop to 25C. Then the foreign food and language.

So many reasons for them to not want go/live other country.

Those who are divorced, children, and over 25 years dont have a choise. They dont get a new thai bf, they dont get a job when over 25 (policy in most companies)! They will look farang, go abroad to work and support their kids and family.

OP has shown honesty and selfrespect, he knows something is wrong. As majority said, better cut the losses now, than more sleepless nights. He loves her very much - 1- one month already she shown that she not care very much.

Time to move on.

[PoorSucker]

I suggest you send her some more money,or you can send it to me and I will forward it,because her sim might have no money.

No she is not cheating on you , she is cheating her boyfriend when she is with you,

Edited August 27, 2009 by PoorSucker

[zorro1]

One post deleted as in one stroke it defamed all Thais and all Women which we aren't going to allow.

two...three....

awww why did you delete the last one? haven't laughed so hard in months. everything mentioned about ping balls and fishes is true. Im not up to date with the "brown" thing whether or not its racist . Funniest post i have read on TV and its gone

[cdnvic]

I laugh my arse off at many deleted posts. Doesn't mean I can allow them though.

[zorro1]

I laugh my arse off at many deleted posts. Doesn't mean I can allow them though.

gave it a 70% chance of being flipped , oh well back to reality ...but Im still ROFL

[Joost]

A man meets a woman. Something romantic happens. Man tells woman he will not consider commitment for a long time. Woman accepts and moves on. Conclusion, woman is a whore.

What a weirdo''s you see on this forum. Why would anyone expect commitment if he isnt able to offer it himself? Remember the good times and move on yourself OP.

Edited August 27, 2009 by Joost

[MrJohnson]

Cannot understand my girlfriend which is thai sometimes (or most of the times)

Been together for many months now and usually when i am in my country she calls and we message all the time. But this time its me who has to call her all the time and many times she doesnt even pick up the phone, and the worst about it she doesnt call back! This is so weird, if she calls me and i dont have time to answer i call her back as soon as i can because i care for her.

I have read many stories and i really fear and beginning to think she is dating someone else, thats why she is ignoring me on the phone sometimes. She usually picks up the phone only early in the morning in Thailand.

This has been going on for over 1 month now and i feel i am getting fed up with this. Feel like she has no feelings for me when she acts like this. Gonna demand some answers from her because this is bugging me alot and i gues you guys would react the same huh? Last time i got so fed up so i asked her right out if me and her are broken up? Do not worry she responded ..... ehm ok. no answers about the calling part. Should i chill ? am i worrying too much? Long distance relationships can do this. But these symptoms i am telling about is a bit worrying to me or what do you guys think? I am no thai expert

C'mon, what logic is there in only picking up the phone in the morning for somebody who supposedly cares for you?

No way she is sincere, sorry.

It is so so sad to witness yet another hopeful young farang guy get suckered in and heartbroken in the Land of Seduction.

Qick, please....someone pass me a tissue.....the Land of Seduction. Classic!

[Beardog]

It seems the same in any girlfriend or it can go boyfriend as well . usually when your gut wrenches & your brain is sending you these messages more times than not it is over Rover. Rarely have I been wrong when I have been duped although the mind always tries to tend to be hopeful. Only once I was wrong & She had a very valid reason.

Good luck- When they are no longer being a square shooter with you time for a change up( Unless you can validate the strange behavior.) Things that make you go HMMMMMM!

[wintermute]

Qick, please....someone pass me a tissue.....the Land of Seduction. Classic!

Must be quite the roller coaster of emotions to be seduced right off the plane when you land in Thailand. Also at the guy whose pooying doesn't call him anymore. If you can't take a hint buddy you're a lost cause.

[losworld]

Yeah she's probably with another boyfriend or a "customer" if she works in the business and in that case maybe on a paid vacation around Thailand.

Interesting she didn't take your money. Perhaps you didn't offer enough or weren't genuine enough or the amount was too small?

Otherwise she's a good girl who has a new boyfriend or she wants to break it off with you.

Either way not good news. If she really cared for you she would be answering your calls. Time to move on.

[Datsun240Z]

How quick people here have labelled

Most Thais do not want to go/move other country. Thais are not like that. Remember Thai Rak Thai. For them, their country is number 1, and the place they want to live. Family always comes first, and to be abroad and far from family is unberable for most of them. Thais are freezing cold when the temp drop to 25C. Then the foreign food and language.

So many reasons for them to not want go/live other country.

This should be printed out for every foreigner who tries to take a Thai girl to his home country, to aviod later sadness.

[zorro1]

Yeah she's probably with another boyfriend or a "customer" if she works in the business and in that case maybe on a paid vacation around Thailand.

Interesting she didn't take your money. Perhaps you didn't offer enough or weren't genuine enough or the amount was too small?

Otherwise she's a good girl who has a new boyfriend or she wants to break it off with you.

Either way not good news. If she really cared for you she would be answering your calls. Time to move on.

The good operators never ever ask for money . Actually I thought i was the only guy in Thailand whos new G/F from BKK paid for 5 nights at the hard rock hotel using her estranged husbands credit cards (didnt know at the time). 3 months later after we moved in and within a week she asked for a loan of 1 million bht. they always go for the Mill its nice n round. When I looked confused she said "1 million bht nutting for you" 2 days later she moved out. I still have the 1 mill

Edited August 27, 2009 by zorro1

[PS3]

Remind me about a lady age 30. We meet on Internet and chatted 2 months, Then she finally told me she would come Pattaya next Saturday to see me. This is a true story.

At the bus station Pattaya Nua:

Me: Hello, nice to meet you.

She: Hello how are you?

Me: Fine thank you.

She: I need a bf who can help me with my debts in Bangkok. I need 1 million. Can you give me?

All that, in less than 1 minute ....

I still laughing years later.

Got to love em

[zorro1]

the sad part is in the end they will get the money. If they look great , speak great English, a little bit white with a slight Chinese look they can have it all. If they actually have real cleavage then its a done deal. Mine had all of the above and liked to watch porno's, doesnt t get better than that

she now owns a boy bar in samui. where did that come from? she was penniless when we split lol got to love them they are the best at their trade

[Geekfreaklover]

To the OP - I reognized the style of writing from the start as being typed by someone that has posted on this forum before with equally troublesome woes. I'm happy to play along with it, it's all good sport.

The thing is, Tommy Boy, unless you come back with confirmation of where and how you met the object of your assumed dilemma then we can not continue to feed you with the information that you need.

Otherwise we are just pissing in the wind.

For the third time: Where did you meet this lady?

[NanLaew]

If she has drastically changed the way she acts with you then something is different.

Ummm... right.

[pattaya_girl]

Where did you meet this lady ??

Why will you not answer everyone asking where you met her, are you shy maybe?

You expect us to give you advise, but how can we help you when you won't answer our questions.

Edited August 27, 2009 by pattaya_girl

[cyb]

Where did you meet this lady ??

Why will you not answer everyone asking where you met her, are you shy maybe?

You expect us to give you advise, but how can we help you when you won't answer our questions.

I am beginning to think now!!!!

[zorro1]

Where did you meet this lady ??

Why will you not answer everyone asking where you met her, are you shy maybe?

You expect us to give you advise, but how can we help you when you won't answer our questions.

no offense pattaya girl your avatar is sensational even google images , Type in cow, udders, pole doesn't come up with it, brilliant wit! however Im starting to think wherever your dancing is where the op met the love of his life

[rgs2001uk]

How quick people here have labelled

Most Thais do not want to go/move other country. Thais are not like that. Remember Thai Rak Thai. For them, their country is number 1, and the place they want to live. Family always comes first, and to be abroad and far from family is unberable for most of them. Thais are freezing cold when the temp drop to 25C. Then the foreign food and language.

So many reasons for them to not want go/live other country.

This should be printed out for every foreigner who tries to take a Thai girl to his home country, to aviod later sadness.

Talking from experience there are we Nissan? What later sadness would that be?

I suspect the girls gb57 mentions are from a certain segment of Thai society, the ones some dumb guys marry and only find out later she has 2 kids in tow she never told him about, and in some cases still has a husband in tow.

Yes what gb57 says is true, but the opposite is also true, in the past month I have spoken to two Thai women who live abroad, and are happy to do so, so much in fact they have no intention of ever living here again, there main reason for not wanting to come back, family.

Personally my wife cant wait to leave here, and it wont be sadness she feels when we leave.

[gburns57au]

Most Thais do not want to go/move other country. Thais are not like that. Remember Thai Rak Thai. For them, their country is number 1, and the place they want to live. Family always comes first, and to be abroad and far from family is unberable for most of them. Thais are freezing cold when the temp drop to 25C. Then the foreign food and language.

So many reasons for them to not want go/live other country

This should be printed out for every foreigner who tries to take a Thai girl to his home country, to aviod later sadness.

Talking from experience there are we Nissan? What later sadness would that be?

I suspect the girls gb57 mentions are from a certain segment of Thai society, the ones some dumb guys marry and only find out later she has 2 kids in tow she never told him about, and in some cases still has a husband in tow.

Yes what gb57 says is true, but the opposite is also true, in the past month I have spoken to two Thai women who live abroad, and are happy to do so, so much in fact they have no intention of ever living here again, there main reason for not wanting to come back, family.

Personally my wife cant wait to leave here, and it wont be sadness she feels when we leave.

The above comments are not mine......some poor quoting from another member....you need to go abck to page 3 for my original post.

My own wife was happy to leave Thailand also....even though she left family behind.....I have met numerous girls through my wife who have been here in Oz on tourist visas and there is only one who wasnt too sure about living here.....the rest cant wait to get back here.

[rgs2001uk]

gburns57au, apologies, wasnt aware of poor quoting.

Didnt read the entire thread, my own fault.

[gburns57au]

How quick people here have labelled her as a cheating lying hooker without even knowing the true situation. And you people claim to know the Thai Psyche.

Isnt it totally reasonable to suggest that she has realised that it was getting expensive to call him on mobile rates and decided to let him call her? after all she takes the call every week. It is not like she is avoiding him, there could be many reasons why the phone situation has changed, she is the only one that can tell him why.

I used to call my now wife all the time, she rang me only if she had something important to tell me. We have been married for two years now and living in Oz.

The OP is going through that fragile period after first meeting a girl in another country and is now sitting at home worrying about what she is doing.....we have all been there and done that.

OP when you first enter a long distance relationship you have to do so with a great amount of trust, If you lose that trust you lose the relationship. Think of your situation, you have come to public forum to ask a bunch of strangers to give advise on a personal issue. Ask yourself! Who should you be trusting first?

Remember every relationship requires work and sacrifice....if you are prepared to ditch her on the advice of a bunch of strangers, maybe you need to look at your own commitment values first.

You did say you love her right?

I just asked my wife about this and her first response was......maybe she not talk on the phone so much because she has nothing to talk about, nothing new happen and it is boring to talk about the same thing everyday.....better to talk once a week and save money too.

- Not true. Many of us say we think she have another man, That dont mean she's a lying hooker as you claim we all say. We did say we think she's cheating on him. OP said she never asked for money, so no reason for us to label her as bad girl.

I didnt say "all the people" Some have labelled her a hooker , some a liar and some a cheater

- He already told her he's worried that she not answer calls from him, or call him back. Still she not change / improve.

- Why she not answer his calls? Free for her.

Answered this already

- OP used his instinct, then he posted to get others opinion before breaking off. When tirak change a lot for a long time = no smoke without fire.

- OP ready to ditch her before posting. Even he loves her - he know "something is going on".

He doesnt know so he came here looking for people to help him justify whatever he does

- Love must be 2 ways. Here the love is now only 1 way. She shown that 1 month already.

How do you know that, are you assuming it from what he has said, maybe she doesnt see it the way you do

The start says it all - Is she cheating on me? When you feel something is wrong for a long time, is usually is.

How long should he wait? 6 months? 1 year?

Perhaps he should sort his own problem out without seeking "advice" from strangers

And in the mean time, he's the one getting more hurt and sleepless nights. While she probably has moved to "greener fields".

A good lady with real love, dont change over night unless there is someone more interesting in the picture.

If she mad at him for something, is it real love to punish him for 1 month?

Again we dont know what the other side of the story is

Most Thais do not want to go/move other country. Thais are not like that. Remember Thai Rak Thai. For them, their country is number 1, and the place they want to live. Family always comes first, and to be abroad and far from family is unberable for most of them. Thais are freezing cold when the temp drop to 25C. Then the foreign food and language.

So many reasons for them to not want go/live other country.

Those who are divorced, children, and over 25 years dont have a choise. They dont get a new thai bf, they dont get a job when over 25 (policy in most companies)! They will look farang, go abroad to work and support their kids and family.

The last two paragraphs are full of stereotypical BS......

OP has shown honesty and selfrespect, he knows something is wrong. As majority said, better cut the losses now, than more sleepless nights. He loves her very much - 1- one month already she shown that she not care very much.

Well I guess if airing your problems in a public forum is showing self respect.....it is isnt it?

Time to move on.

Edited August 27, 2009 by gburns57au

[gburns57au]

gburns57au, apologies, wasnt aware of poor quoting.

Didnt read the entire thread, my own fault.

No Worries

[pattaya_girl]

Where did you meet this lady ??

Why will you not answer everyone asking where you met her, are you shy maybe?

You expect us to give you advise, but how can we help you when you won't answer our questions.

no offense pattaya girl your avatar is sensational even google images , Type in cow, udders, pole doesn't come up with it, brilliant wit! however Im starting to think wherever your dancing is where the op met the love of his life

Thankyou Zorro, I am not offended, quite the opposite really, its a compliment. I am glad you found my avatar is sensational..

Back on topic - still waiting to hear where the OP met his lady !!!

Come on now, spill the beans, don't be shy about it, this is Thailand.

[PS3]

gburns: I call it selfrespect when you choose to end a relationship, who has been going downhill last month - rather than sit there and wait for months, being sleepless and worry "what are she doing now".

"stereotyping" ? me? shure, what do I know? Only lived among 65.000.000 Thais for 10+ years. I guess I know nothing.

= She should have answer his call, she does not.

= The way she behaved 1 month now, OP doesn't need to "justify" anything. She brought this up on herself, by her behavior last month.

= So how do you see it, when she not care answer calls or return them for 1 month? This a nice way to express her devoted love to him forever?

= I would have asked my friends before ask this forum, but, they might never been to Asia. Therefore no help for him in this case. Then asking here is better than nothing.

= "stereotypical BS" ??? when you get to Thailand next time, please PM me, and I will be delighted to show you some real life bs as you call it, outside the big cities. Can show you how difficult it is to be more than 25, divorced, kids, and want a job that pay the bills. They might be very lucky, salary 4.000 (USD 119) and then pay all the bills ..... BS?

I just lost respect for you when you write "BS", lets stay On Topic and avoid being personal here, shall we? Btw, I dont drink or go bars, so dont stereotype my opinions in that category either. Also I am very happy married. No bitternes against Thais, in fact I love Thailand.

I respect you have another opinion - can you respect mine?

OP has not been online again or answer some important questions, so I guess he dont need any more advice.

[sokal]

Where did you meet this lady ??

Why will you not answer everyone asking where you met her, are you shy maybe?

You expect us to give you advise, but how can we help you when you won't answer our questions.

no offense pattaya girl your avatar is sensational even google images , Type in cow, udders, pole doesn't come up with it, brilliant wit! however Im starting to think wherever your dancing is where the op met the love of his life

Thankyou Zorro, I am not offended, quite the opposite really, its a compliment. I am glad you found my avatar is sensational..

Back on topic - still waiting to hear where the OP met his lady !!!

Come on now, spill the beans, don't be shy about it, this is Thailand.

Probably at Insomnia, are you a Thai Pattaya girl ?

[TommyL]

omg didn't know this topic got so popular Anyways she responds to my call every week, its just that she often doesnt answers the call and i have to call her everytime. Thats what bugs me.

To other questions, we met while i was shopping with a friend at Central and she worked at a clothing store.

So my problem is just that she doesnt call herself or calls me up, just me who has to track along to her wishes all the time. Thats what i am stopping now, i want her to get desperate at me as i have been with her Will see how it goes.

[G54]

I'm afraid you already know the answer - yes she might date someone else. If she not answer the phone, she's busy with someone. If she wasn't, she would/should return you call, as soon she's back from the bathroom/Mart etc. If this happend many times already, you can not trust her.

If she realy love you, she would do same you do = return the missed call asap.

Listen to your instincts.

Lived here 10+ years now, and this is something that happend to many of us. You already asked her why? She knows you worry about this, still she continue not answer your calls ...

I would have cut my losses now, and move on with my life. She's not the right one for you, when she do like this for a month already. Many many more single ladies.

Have to agree 100%