[b]no Timewasters Please[/b]

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Sky Sportsline 25-09-09

No Timewasters Please

Peter Fraser takes a look at the debate surrounding the possible introduction of independent time keepers in football

Following recent events we are pleased to offer a rare opportunity to sample the rewards of working in professional sport, combined with the challenge and adventure of telling the time. Wanted: Male/female. Must be able to count to 60. Good communicator. Salary negotiable. References and own clock essential. Timewasters need not apply.

Do not worry, we have not turned into situations vacant. But if Manchester City and a few others get their way regarding independent time keepers for football matches then the Premier League, Football Association and International Football Association Board may soon be looking to advertise along similar lines as a result of the most-recent, farcical concept from the world of sport.

There have been some off-field ideas which have become reality that seem so pointless they make you smile. For example, the London Olympic Delivery Authority taking lead from Trafalgar Square and hiring a Harris Hawk to prevent pigeons and nesting birds from causing disruption as the 2012 Olympic Park is built near Stratford.

If the policy had been used at Beijing's Bird's Nest in 2008 there would have been a sense of Oriental and Olympic mystique. But the more-than-probable sight of a bird of prey in the East End of England's capital pecking at the discarded remains of fish and chips, surrounded by tattered pages of the London Lite, makes you feel so dirty that you want to reach for the wire wool and bleach. However, we digress.

Thankfully, the laughable concept of an independent time keeper being introduced to the football world is unlikely to happen. But following the dramatic derby between Manchester United and Manchester City on Sunday, the plan has been mooted as a genuine possibility. Have people grown so bored with the 'goalline technology debate' that they have decided a new angle is required to spice things up?

After substitute Michael Owen scored in the sixth minute of added time at Old Trafford to secure United's thrilling 4-3 victory, City were left outraged because the match officials had indicated that there would only be a minimum (remember that word) of four additional minutes before the final whistle.

With the dust and raw emotions of the immediate aftermath of the match having settled and calmed, City manager Mark Hughes remains angry and when the idea was put to him during a press conference on Tuesday the fiery Welshman agreed that an independent time keeper could help prevent similar events occurring in the future.

Forty-eight hours after watching his side suffer the heartbreak of defeat to their bitter rivals, and a stinging first loss of the season, the City boss cautiously, but clearly, said of an independent time keeper: "I'm not saying I'm advocating it, but maybe that is an alternative that can be investigated."

So have we now reached a stage where telling the time is proving so tricky that back-up needs to be drafted in to help a referee, two referee's assistants (linesmen), a fourth official and probably a couple of other behind-the-scenes matchday boffins? If Uefa gets its way there will also be another couple of men in black stalking the opposing goallines in years to come, leaving us with at least six match officials who presumably cannot tell when Mickey Mouse's big hand reaches 12. Are there any primary school children who have their weekends spare to help solve this riddle?

Where exactly are these time-keeping experts going to come from? Does anybody have contacts in Switzerland, they make a mean Omega? And who would want this job? Imagination suggests it would involve sitting in a darkened room surrounded by hundreds of models and varieties of ticking clocks, with burnt toast smouldering in the background and maybe a fold-up bed for company. A scene not totally dissimilar to that which accompanies the opening credits of Robert Zemeckis' Back to the Future.

The underlying problem for City and Hughes, who benefited on more than a few occasions when a United player from what was nicknamed 'Fergie time', is that their argument from Sunday's Manchester derby has no basis. Owen scored after the additional four minutes had been played, however, Craig Bellamy had also drawn City level at 3-3 and substitutions had taken place in the added time to warrant further seconds.

Now we have an epidemic on our hands where every time-keeping incident is being highlighted without any need, as has been the case after Stoke's Andy Griffin scored a 96th minute winner in the 4-3 victory over Blackpool in the third round of the Carling Cup on Tuesday. Shock, horror, only five minutes of added time had been shown on the illuminated, electronic board, but that is a minimum and is not a definitive guide.

Admittedly, there is a grey area. Independent time keepers, though, would not solve the problem and the sooner that ridiculous debate goes away, the better.

The difficulty is in communicating a clear-and-defined period of time to players, managers and fans. The obvious answer would be to remove the pesky minimum from proceedings when the board is shown, however, that would invite all manner of time-wasting antics after the added minutes had been set.

Another alternative would be for City, who have not exactly adhered themselves to neutrals at times this season, and others to accept that you win some and you lose some. If the logic of the football world is correct, things balance out over the course of a season and Hughes' side will inevitably sneak a late win in return at some point. Defeat needs to be taken on the chin.

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