Did Not "fool Around"

[cognos]

Many of the male farang I know in LOS either fool around on their wife or have a mia noi. Without going into details, I came very close to fooling around on the good lovely Thai wife. Thank God I came to my senses just in the nick of time. The guilt trip overtook me and I backed out. It was a little Clintonesque perhaps, but there was no actual..well you know. The bottom line is I now know how dangerous it is on many levels( as if I didn't know before ) For one thing, you can have a very lovely, jai dee sexy Thai wife ( I have), but even coming close to fooling around can wreck the sex with your wife, albeit temporarly. I guess it comes down to choice, but I sure made the right decision in avoiding fooling around. I write this to caution others in my position who are tempted..DON'T if you can avoid it, you'll be so happy afterwards. If you can't avoid it, you are probably in the majority, but I hope not.Signed...CLOSE CALL PS..I know the temptation can be really strong, intoxicating, like an almost over-powering drug.The bottom line is if you can resist the temptation, you end up with a degree of self respect and integrity that was almost lost.

[robblok]

All depends on the relation you have with your wife, there are such things as open marriages. I must say i was in one for a while but its dangerous. The wife did get jealous in the end so i stopped it, I on the other hand did not get jealous if she did something. I have seen an open marriage work a few times and seen it not work more times.

[cognos]

the wife told me I could go for short time when she had mens..but I am quite sure it was just a test..I won't take her up on it..having the permission to go for short time may make it easier to avoid actually doing it..the best things in life are usually difficult ( as opposed to free as Lennon said ), and this was one of them..

[samuibeachcomber]

yep the temptations come fast and furious in thailand no matter where you live.was in a local bar one night being pressured(terrible i know)told them i was married,and was told they dont care and that what they cared about was taking care of me.

[a2396]

the wife told me I could go for short time when she had mens..but I am quite sure it was just a test..I won't take her up on it..having the permission to go for short time may make it easier to avoid actually doing it..the best things in life are usually difficult ( as opposed to free as Lennon said ), and this was one of them..

You get a "free pass" every month?? That's a new one on me. Other options do exist for her to "take care you", which should suffice (one would hope).

[a2396]

yep the temptations come fast and furious in thailand no matter where you live.was in a local bar one night being pressured(terrible i know)told them i was married,and was told they dont care and that what they cared about was taking care of me.

So, how much did the bar girls want per whack? I hardly think they were climbing all over you offering sex for free.

[stiggy]

hope she isnt on Thai visa.. or its off to the duck farm.

[cognos]

the wife told me I could go for short time when she had mens..but I am quite sure it was just a test..I won't take her up on it..having the permission to go for short time may make it easier to avoid actually doing it..the best things in life are usually difficult ( as opposed to free as Lennon said ), and this was one of them..

You get a "free pass" every month?? That's a new one on me. Other options do exist for her to "take care you", which should suffice (one would hope).

I never married till I was 50, 2 years ago ( wife is mid-thirties) and was used to doing whatever i felt like prior, so perhaps toeing the line in general was more difficult for me than for others. More power to you if you never got the urge..but its a strong attraction for many, including me. The bottom line is I'd rather have self-respect, and in my books once you fool around on the good wife you lose it permanently in many respects. The post is simply to caution others to think twice, thats all. Life is about helping yourself AND others. I do understand your point however

[cognos]

hope she isnt on Thai visa.. or its off to the duck farm.

I'm just honest to a fault, unlike many here perhaps

[JUDAS]

This kind of thread gets covered quite often but still interesting none the less. Indeed there are temptations here but it boils down to a simple decision, do you resist the temptations or go for it. Not difficult really, and anyone who says they can't resist their sexual urges would worry me.

[cognos]

hope she isnt on Thai visa.. or its off to the duck farm.

good point, however I'm not sure how you can be in Duck soup for being honest and not doing the deed. I like living on the edge a bit, but will avoid digging a big hole and throwing myself in

[givenall]

yep the temptations come fast and furious in thailand no matter where you live.was in a local bar one night being pressured(terrible i know)told them i was married,and was told they dont care and that what they cared about was taking care of me.

So, how much did the bar girls want per whack? I hardly think they were climbing all over you offering sex for free.

Oh well most of the time is all about money. You get it if you are willing to pay. Even when you find a soul mate at first is probably because you have money. Hopefully that will change if you really find your mate.

Most of the Thai gals I met don’t care if you are married if you spend $$$ on them. May be not just in Thailand but these days all over

[toptuan]

hope she isnt on Thai visa.. or its off to the duck farm.

good point, however I'm not sure how you can be in Duck soup for being honest and not doing the deed. I like living on the edge a bit, but will avoid digging a big hole and throwing myself in

It's not the duck SOUP that lurks, it's the duck PEN you wanna avoid.

[cognos]

hope she isnt on Thai visa.. or its off to the duck farm.

good point, however I'm not sure how you can be in Duck soup for being honest and not doing the deed. I like living on the edge a bit, but will avoid digging a big hole and throwing myself in

It's not the duck SOUP that lurks, it's the duck PEN you wanna avoid.

she still trusts me, with decent reason I guess

[LadyHeather]

yep the temptations come fast and furious in thailand no matter where you live.was in a local bar one night being pressured(terrible i know)told them i was married,and was told they dont care and that what they cared about was taking care of me.

Until the next punter comes along with a bigger wallet.

Congratulations to cognos for realizing that a working happy marriage is worth keeping and that showing respect for one's spouse is more than just buying her things.

[tartempion]

What a ridiculous post.

Working in Europe the vast majority of people I dealt with in my consultancy business where fooling around and/or having a mistress.

I also worked a for a major company in Atlanta, Georgia and fooling around with employees was "business as usual"

Thailand is no different, males are males all over the world.

[IanForbes]

It's just like stealing. It's real easy... until you get caught... which ALWAYS happens. If you don't value your marriage then play around with whomever you wish. But, be prepared to accept the consequences of your own actions. If you like variety then stay single. It's less expensive and there's more sex with younger and more attractive partners. If you DO value your marriage then work at keeping it the way it was when you first decided to get married.

[TAWP]

yep the temptations come fast and furious in thailand no matter where you live.was in a local bar one night being pressured(terrible i know)told them i was married,and was told they dont care and that what they cared about was taking care of me.

So, how much did the bar girls want per whack? I hardly think they were climbing all over you offering sex for free.

Actually, if you are young, look good and know how to talk to a lady without coming off as a creep etc, they will be doing just that. Even if you tell them that you are married and not going to give them anything.

Not everyone here is a washed up punter.

[samuibeachcomber]

yep the temptations come fast and furious in thailand no matter where you live.was in a local bar one night being pressured(terrible i know)told them i was married,and was told they dont care and that what they cared about was taking care of me.

So, how much did the bar girls want per whack? I hardly think they were climbing all over you offering sex for free.

Actually, if you are young, look good and know how to talk to a lady without coming off as a creep etc, they will be doing just that. Even if you tell them that you are married and not going to give them anything.

Not everyone here is a washed up punter.

thank god for that

[samuibeachcomber]

To those of you that cannot control yourselves because it's the first time in your lives that any Female, apart from your Mother, has given you a second glance, think about what you may do, what you may catch, the disease you can give to your wife, you could hand her a death sentence via HIV AIDS for gods sake, if you care so little for her, then please inform her of your habits so that she can leave you.

thats why people wear condoms Maigo6

[ProfessorFart]

Perfect reason why folks shouldn't get wed here.

Most men who come to live in Thailand have failed at relationships all their lives, then think all will be well when they met a Thai lass who fits their sterotype.

When they realise its not all roses, off they go shagging owt that 1000 Baht will get them.

Simple rule. Don't get married.

If you couldn't manage a relationship with someone you had cultural and linguistic ties with in your own country, then it's not going to get any easier with someone you don't share any ties with bar the wallet.

[samran]

yep the temptations come fast and furious in thailand no matter where you live.was in a local bar one night being pressured(terrible i know)told them i was married,and was told they dont care and that what they cared about was taking care of me.

So, how much did the bar girls want per whack? I hardly think they were climbing all over you offering sex for free.

Actually, if you are young, look good and know how to talk to a lady without coming off as a creep etc, they will be doing just that. Even if you tell them that you are married and not going to give them anything.

Not everyone here is a washed up punter.

Well, because you aren't a creep means they waive the first payment

Tell them you are poor and you have no money. Watch them run a mile.

[StateSix]

Many of the male farang I know in LOS either fool around on their wife or have a mia noi. Without going into details, I came very close to fooling around on the good lovely Thai wife. Thank God I came to my senses just in the nick of time. The guilt trip overtook me and I backed out. It was a little Clintonesque perhaps, but there was no actual..well you know. The bottom line is I now know how dangerous it is on many levels( as if I didn't know before ) For one thing, you can have a very lovely, jai dee sexy Thai wife ( I have), but even coming close to fooling around can wreck the sex with your wife, albeit temporarly. I guess it comes down to choice, but I sure made the right decision in avoiding fooling around. I write this to caution others in my position who are tempted..DON'T if you can avoid it, you'll be so happy afterwards. If you can't avoid it, you are probably in the majority, but I hope not.Signed...CLOSE CALL PS..I know the temptation can be really strong, intoxicating, like an almost over-powering drug.The bottom line is if you can resist the temptation, you end up with a degree of self respect and integrity that was almost lost.

Are you invoking the Clinton defence that oral isn't cheating? Do you reckon she would see it the same way?

More importantly for those guys who think it isn't cheating, can your wife use the same defence? It was only a bit of oral, we didn't go all the way!!!

[gpdjohn]

Never been a "ladies man" so my skills are rather limited I admit.

When one of these lovlies make eyes at me, my knees go weak and my eyes gloss over..horns pop outta my head..

I get scared

I start to break out in a cold sweat

Visions of " Penthouse Letters" wafe through my brain

I stutter in my speech

and then I run home and hide in the closet until I think it's safe out....

Hug my wife...

She thinks I cheat

I let her, cause I'm mid 50's, not fat, not thin...and feel older every day.

It feels nice thinking that some hot babe wants you ( even if you know it's not real )

Nope, not for me...

Cuz I'm a chicken, gai mak mak...

I think I need to eat more fruit..I feel bloated and drink too much beer

[meom]

the wife told me I could go for short time when she had mens..but I am quite sure it was just a test..I won't take her up on it..having the permission to go for short time may make it easier to avoid actually doing it..the best things in life are usually difficult ( as opposed to free as Lennon said ), and this was one of them..

You get a "free pass" every month?? That's a new one on me. Other options do exist for her to "take care you", which should suffice (one would hope).

I never married till I was 50, 2 years ago ( wife is mid-thirties) and was used to doing whatever i felt like prior, so perhaps toeing the line in general was more difficult for me than for others. More power to you if you never got the urge..but its a strong attraction for many, including me. The bottom line is I'd rather have self-respect, and in my books once you fool around on the good wife you lose it permanently in many respects. The post is simply to caution others to think twice, thats all. Life is about helping yourself AND others. I do understand your point however

Having 10 minutes sex (or 3 minutes for you Aussies) with a prostitute hardly qualifies as fooling around in my opinion. Having a mia noi without your wife's knowledge is a different matter though.

Anyway each to their own.

[eek]

Although i sympathise that male hormones seem to have an effect on men that i guess ill never quite understand, women also get tempted and have opportunities. But, i think women are more likely to be rational and consider the consequences and the emotional impact it can have on their family. I guess some men lose themselves in the moment..hormones taking over? I think if a husband found out that his wife was messing around on him, he would be cut up (or worse, suddenly noticed he had an STD that could only be linked to having a new partner, but had been faithful). No one needs that.

I think if a person wants an open relationship, then you owe it to your partner to be open and be with someone that doesnt mind, or enjoys being part of that. If thats the kind of relationship you want, remember to accept it working both ways, crazy to balk at your gf or wife doing the same.

Maybe some cant handle the thought of having sex with one person for the rest of their lives..well no need to think that way, you dont know how long you have together, so enjoy the time you do have. Anyway thats what fantasy and imagination is for (or role play or whatever else you are into that you both feel comfortable with). Sex doesnt need to get stale with the same partner. Its only as stale as you make it. I think a sexual relationship with a partner you trust and feel good with is a million times better than sex with a stranger. But again, as a woman, I dont know what it feels like to be a man dealing with testosterone. Do you think a lady looks at her guy who may be out of shape or balding or whatever and not sometimes fancy the thought of some toned taut young guy? Likely too that she can easily go out and get one..but she doesnt. Why? Because she loves and respects you too much to do that to you. Its a good man who thinks the same way about the woman in his life.

I have great respect for those of you, (particularly in a place like Thailand where other men may goad you into going with girls, opportunity is easily available, and where some women dont care if a man is married or not), that keep that respect and consideration for their partners. I wish you all mind blowing sex lives (with your partners)!

This kind of thread gets covered quite often but still interesting none the less. Indeed there are temptations here but it boils down to a simple decision, do you resist the temptations or go for it. Not difficult really, and anyone who says they can't resist their sexual urges would worry me.

Short, but so well said.

Edited October 14, 2009 by eek

[MSingh]

The temptaion is more great in Thailand than in many other Countries in the World because in the touristy areas where most of the Western Men actually live, there is the abundent s*x scene & the fact that many Men here seem to let their ** cough cough ** rule their brain regulary anyway, will always lead to problems, adultery etc etc sadly..

But that's the nature of the Beast in the LOS anyway & no matter how much we turn a blind eye or deny it to ourselves, that's what most marraiges are built on anyway in amazing Thailand..

[eek]

Having 10 minutes sex (or 3 minutes for you Aussies) with a prostitute hardly qualifies as fooling around in my opinion. Having a mia noi without your wife's knowledge is a different matter though.

Anyway each to their own.

Wow...

????

[MJo]

Having 10 minutes sex (or 3 minutes for you Aussies) with a prostitute hardly qualifies as fooling around in my opinion. Having a mia noi without your wife's knowledge is a different matter though.

Anyway each to their own.

Wow...

????

He said each to their own.

My opinion on this differs, but quite few ppl i know consider quick one in the backroom of a bar the same as good old wank alone at home.

So is masturbation cheating ?

[StateSix]

Having 10 minutes sex (or 3 minutes for you Aussies) with a prostitute hardly qualifies as fooling around in my opinion. Having a mia noi without your wife's knowledge is a different matter though.

Anyway each to their own.

Does that mean the wife can also go visit a male prostitute and it doesn't count as fooling around?