473geo Posted February 21, 2010 Share Posted February 21, 2010 (edited) The only valid reason for the girl relinquishing the ties to her mother and family are provided by the potential husband. Confidence....A potential Thai wife must have absolute confidence that this new relationship is for life, that the husband will and can provide for the future?? Look at the amount of posts in these situations saying 'move on' if they can't see things your way!!! a sure fire way of making sure sinsod stays in place and the asking price increases!!!!......and so it should!!!! If you can't pay for a car..........do you go around moaning that the the company has set the price too high......or.....if you want the car.....try to work hard and save hard.........or do you tell every body that will listen that it is not your culture....and you prefer to walk... Ok so you are providing confidence for the mother and family, not buying a car.......but what does being a walker say about you... Edited February 21, 2010 by 473geo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yabaaaa Posted February 21, 2010 Share Posted February 21, 2010 "I agree her having kids is a reason why there should be no sin sod but he said she was unmarried so it is not open and shut."That's right: illegitimate children and her previous lifestyle have no bearing... As for ending the relationship, try this: do not give her any more money. Voila! So, she can have illegitimate children and not legally married and is still an "eligible girl" for sin sod? Of so, that keeps the door open for most of them, since not many young & poor Thais get legally married. I hope I understood your comment correctly. I am reminded of the reply I often get when I ask the darlings if they have a BF. The answer: "I am single", which (to me) only means they are not married. They still can have multiple BF's, GIKS or whatever. A meaningless answer. My wife tells them all the time when they ask " do you have a boyfriend" she says " no boyfriend..................................... I got husband " hahaa customers are always asking her gets on her nerves soemtimes ahhahaa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yabaaaa Posted February 21, 2010 Share Posted February 21, 2010 The main point I'm making is the guy and the girl are the only two that matter. They are choosing to start a family. some apron strings need to be cut. I hope you realize that 90% of Thais would fundamentally disagree with you over this issue. Despite what others have said I have not posted to any of the responses because I wanted to read everyones response. I have been deep in thought about this and I do not want to pay it. And I disagree that 200,000 baht is trifle-put it this way-how many people in the USA or the UK would have 6,000 US dollars 0or 4,500 Euros just lying around in this day and age. Keep in mind that the bulk of us living here are living on 50-80k baht per month. Then the majority of us are not living in a 2k baht a month room so we spend alot to live here. The point is that is not a small amount of money in this country. Sure if you are older or have a company you have the money but if you are living on a fixed income (retiree for example) or are making 60K etc a month it is not a small amount of money. My girlfriend has left me with the impression that the sinsod is paid regardless of the children. I also found it completely laughable that her mother had the nerve to even suggest, even in passing, a million baht. Just four months ago my GF mom asked her to ask me for 100,000 baht to borrow (yeah right) so she could buy her son in law a truck. She said she would pay the money back after she went to her bank in Issan and got the money out of her account. I never understood this as if the money is in the bank just transfer it. I felt like I was being lied to and did not give her the money. I give my girl 20,000 baht a month because she stopped working (I asked her to as I said before) and she has two kids to support that live with her mother. She also said she was making that kind of money before (14,000 baht a month plus 6,000 in tips) working in a hair salon near Lumpini BTS. In fact she has told me several times that 20,000 baht a month is not alot of money and that she had money saved up before (like 100,000 baht) but since she stopped working she used it all. I have always felt 20,000 baht was good money for her but I get the feeling sometimes it is not. Bottom line is that I am not comfortable with this situation anymore. It has made me rethink taking care of two small children (she had them one year apart. She left the father because he had a crappy job and would not find a better one and they never had money), and all the associated responsibilities and being involved with her mother as well. Her mom claims to have saved alot of money on her own even though she does not work and her husband is a taxi driver(and from what I understand they do not make alot of money). Now my GF sister wants her daughter to go to school in Bangkok and live with the mom. My GF said her mom cannot take care of three children so my GF wants her two year old son to live with us now. Sure I may have made mistakes like paying too much etc. But I love her and she has generally been good to me and I have tried to be the same to her. But this is becoming too much. And to make matters worse I would not know how to end it because she lives with me. I cannot just throw her out on the street and the thought of her struggling again as I saw her and being corrupted by the people she was hanging out with when I met her pains me. But I know feel I have to figure out how to end this. What a wuss you appear, just walk away from it there are many more women out there who wont ask for any money. If she really loves you she will walk away from them but from what you tell us I doubt it. Attacha ball and chain to your leg now if it helps. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yabaaaa Posted February 21, 2010 Share Posted February 21, 2010 You know what I really find sickening about all of this is that a woman who has had kids previously is worth less money!! just about sums it all up really! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a2396 Posted February 21, 2010 Share Posted February 21, 2010 The main point I'm making is the guy and the girl are the only two that matter. They are choosing to start a family. some apron strings need to be cut. I hope you realize that 90% of Thais would fundamentally disagree with you over this issue. Despite what others have said I have not posted to any of the responses because I wanted to read everyones response. I have been deep in thought about this and I do not want to pay it. And I disagree that 200,000 baht is trifle-put it this way-how many people in the USA or the UK would have 6,000 US dollars 0or 4,500 Euros just lying around in this day and age. Keep in mind that the bulk of us living here are living on 50-80k baht per month. Then the majority of us are not living in a 2k baht a month room so we spend alot to live here. The point is that is not a small amount of money in this country. Sure if you are older or have a company you have the money but if you are living on a fixed income (retiree for example) or are making 60K etc a month it is not a small amount of money. My girlfriend has left me with the impression that the sinsod is paid regardless of the children. I also found it completely laughable that her mother had the nerve to even suggest, even in passing, a million baht. Just four months ago my GF mom asked her to ask me for 100,000 baht to borrow (yeah right) so she could buy her son in law a truck. She said she would pay the money back after she went to her bank in Issan and got the money out of her account. I never understood this as if the money is in the bank just transfer it. I felt like I was being lied to and did not give her the money. I give my girl 20,000 baht a month because she stopped working (I asked her to as I said before) and she has two kids to support that live with her mother. She also said she was making that kind of money before (14,000 baht a month plus 6,000 in tips) working in a hair salon near Lumpini BTS. In fact she has told me several times that 20,000 baht a month is not alot of money and that she had money saved up before (like 100,000 baht) but since she stopped working she used it all. I have always felt 20,000 baht was good money for her but I get the feeling sometimes it is not. Bottom line is that I am not comfortable with this situation anymore. It has made me rethink taking care of two small children (she had them one year apart. She left the father because he had a crappy job and would not find a better one and they never had money), and all the associated responsibilities and being involved with her mother as well. Her mom claims to have saved alot of money on her own even though she does not work and her husband is a taxi driver(and from what I understand they do not make alot of money). Now my GF sister wants her daughter to go to school in Bangkok and live with the mom. My GF said her mom cannot take care of three children so my GF wants her two year old son to live with us now. Sure I may have made mistakes like paying too much etc. But I love her and she has generally been good to me and I have tried to be the same to her. But this is becoming too much. And to make matters worse I would not know how to end it because she lives with me. I cannot just throw her out on the street and the thought of her struggling again as I saw her and being corrupted by the people she was hanging out with when I met her pains me. But I know feel I have to figure out how to end this. What a wuss you appear, just walk away from it there are many more women out there who wont ask for any money. If she really loves you she will walk away from them but from what you tell us I doubt it. Attacha ball and chain to your leg now if it helps. Could you send me a list of the "MANY women out there who won't ask for money"? In my 5 years here, I have met (1) one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huey Posted February 21, 2010 Share Posted February 21, 2010 The only valid reason for the girl relinquishing the ties to her mother and family are provided by the potential husband.Confidence....A potential Thai wife must have absolute confidence that this new relationship is for life, that the husband will and can provide for the future?? Look at the amount of posts in these situations saying 'move on' if they can't see things your way!!! a sure fire way of making sure sinsod stays in place and the asking price increases!!!!......and so it should!!!! If you can't pay for a car..........do you go around moaning that the the company has set the price too high......or.....if you want the car.....try to work hard and save hard.........or do you tell every body that will listen that it is not your culture....and you prefer to walk... Ok so you are providing confidence for the mother and family, not buying a car.......but what does being a walker say about you... You lost your mind. First of all it's a woman, a relationship, not a car. I feel bad for any woman you marry if you look at her like a car to trade in. However lets roll with your preposterous analogy for a second; You buy a car and once you paid it off all you have to do is pay for fuel and occasional maintenance. A wife you pay for forever its much much more than fuel or vehicle maintenance, she has kids, you pay, she gets sick, you pay...if she gets stolen by another man YOU PAY HALF of everything you own! You Buy a car and you don't have to take care of the salesman as he gets older and can't work at the dealership any more. Man, don't get me going... Sin sot is a ignorant ill-meaning, barbaric custom, right up with Malays caning their women for drinking a damm beer. So if your gonna buy into it be damm sure she, and her family are of a higher caliber than what your dealing with now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cdnvic Posted February 21, 2010 Share Posted February 21, 2010 Hardly anything new or informative here, just a lot of posts that talk about women as if they were chattel. Enough is enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.png.3b3332cc2256ad0edbc2fe9404feeef0.png)
Recommended Posts