Why Being A Dj Is Not Cool Any More

[DJ Pat]

You know who you are. Standing behind that deck of turntables, holding one headphone to your ear, being pretentious and aloof as you play with knobs and shuffle through records. You can just settle down, because nobody cares that you're a DJ.

1. Rave DJ -- Dude, first of all, raves were never even cool to begin with. The fact that you're still trying to "keep the party going" ten years later is bordering on The Most Pathetic Thing Ever. You can pile up all the lasers and lights and disco balls and glo sticks and pacifiers you want, but all you'll have is a big heap of Who Gives A Shit. And quit passing out all those stupid glossy promo cards announcing your latest weekly "Bliss-Chillout-Ambient-House-Electro-fest". You're 35 now -- isn't that a little old to be handing out postcards with psychadelic robots all over them? Also, your "DJ Name", whatever it is, is stupid.

2. Hipster DJ -- You silly scenesters can stand there and look as jaded and above-it-all as you want, but you're not fooling me into thinking you're some kind of ######ing rock star. Say it along with me, "I am not a musician". No matter how many obscure bands you know or how big your record collection is, you're playing someone else's music. So stop acting like Mick ######ing Jagger at every retarded party and gallery opening I go to. I have a pretty impressive DVD collection and know quite a bit about film history, but if I show up at your house and play Taxi Driver for you, does that make me Martin Scorsese? No, it doesn't. Also, whatever you're wearing right now, it looks ridiculous

3. Celebrity DJ -- Hey Carlos D, Danny Masterson and every indie rocker in the world -- you're already a star. You're already rich, already famous, already spreading your "love" (and herpes) far and wide with all the groupies you could possibly want. Do you seriously need more attention? Do you need to show us that you have really excellent taste in music? Do you need to throw in an ironically bad song to show us you also have an adorable, self-deprecating sense of humor? Really, you do? Well turn off the ######ing lights when you're done, <deleted>.

4. Angry Hip Hop DJ -- Sup dude, you're cool, honest!

5. Angry Music Snob DJ -- I don't really care if you have rare original first-press Joy Division vinyl, you're still just a douchebag with a record player. Don't you get tired of lugging around 400 pounds of vinyl just to be ignored by bars and clubs full of people who haven't heard of -- and could care less about -- your music collection? Get an iPod, dude. And don't even THINK about launching into your diatribe about how mp3s are inferior and DJ's who use iPod's are posers. There is no "art" to DJing. I don't care if you're using turntables, iPods, a laptop or a My First Sony Record Player, you're still just playing other people's music. Get over yourself, you pretentious jackass.

The point is, while I enjoy good music in the background when I'm out reveling, I think we can all agree to cut out the lame DJ worship. I mean, think of how many people you know who claim to be DJ's. Everyon'e a ######ing DJ. I'm DJing right now here in my cubicle. I just segued from Bloc Party's "Banquet" into Kings of Leon's "The Bucket" - isn't that amazing.

Edited May 13, 2005 by DJ Pat

[penzman]

Being a musician, I particularly liked #2.

Your post clearly expresses what I've been thinking for years about the DJ thing.

Somewhat like Elvis who never wrote a single song he sang.

[BIG SPUDS]

Cant knock it though mate, moneys good, free beer, loose women, free entry to the club and you get to listen to what you want!!!

Who give a F@@k what people think!!.

I did it for 8 or so years, theres not many other jobs you get paid £400 a hour and all the beer you can drink!!

[Pie Boy]

Cant knock it though mate, moneys good, free beer, loose women, free entry to the club and you get to listen to what you want!!!

Who give a F@@k what people think!!.

I did it for 8 or so years, theres not many other jobs you get paid £400 a hour and all the beer you can drink!!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Have you still got your gear spuds ? I fancy a bash at this djing malarky.

[chownah]

When I was a youngster they had DJ's because music was only found on small round black discs and different songs were found on each side of these discs. If someone wanted to hear a particular song then first the correct disc had to be found and then it had to be oriented so the proper side was up and it had to be placed on a phonograph....a phonograph is a device for retrieving the data from the disc and converting it into sound....we called t his data retrieval "playing the music". This process of finding, orienting, and playing the disc was not automated so a human had to performed all of these tasks. This person was called the "discjokey" which was sometimes shortened into "DJ". I know this seems very strange to all of you who have digital music which can be manipulated electronically. DJ's are no longer needed.....hooray that it can be done so easily now. But old habits die hard and the DJ is still with us. DJ's are like dinosaurs, perhaps thats why they are so strange.

[Jeff1]

When I was a youngster they had DJ's because music was only found on small round black discs and different songs were found on each side of these discs.  If someone wanted to hear a particular song then first the correct disc had to be found and then it had to be oriented so the proper side was up and it had to be placed on a phonograph....a phonograph is a device for retrieving the data from the disc and converting it into sound....we called t his data retrieval "playing the music".  This process of finding, orienting, and playing the disc was not automated so a human had to performed all of these tasks.  This person was called the "discjokey" which was sometimes shortened into "DJ".  I know this seems very strange to all of you who have digital music which can be manipulated electronically.  DJ's are no longer needed.....hooray that it can be done so easily now.  But old habits die hard and the DJ is still with us.  DJ's are like dinosaurs, perhaps thats why they are so strange.

Well said and very good point .

[custard]

Based on your avatar, I reckon you've had too much beer while DJing.

Edited May 14, 2005 by custard

[steverino]

Yeah, well said...I love the Jet song "Roll over DJ" as he says pretty much what you said...Great stuff

[jaidam]

Amen to this thread.Agree with the all of it.

One more thing that winds me up is when these knob jockeys refer to the act of playing their &lt;deleted&gt; cd's or whatever as a "gig".&lt;deleted&gt;.

My day has already been ruined by a small though highly offensive ad in the Nation.Anybody else suffering after reading it.

I quote

DJ Paul James

His dj style is fun,edgy,vain and accessible.You might hear The Rapture mixed with London electro or Gwen Stefani mixed with an old 80's classic like Blondie.Paul James is more concerned with blending a punked up mix of 00's with nostalgic classics to make sure the dance floor never guesses what is coming next.

ends.

In the photo that accompanies this tosh is a photo of the mighty dj.He looks like one of the Ramones but with a more arrogant sneer.

So does anybody know of a reasonably priced hitman available next weekend.

[Insight]

Pat, this is just downright retarded.

The original article, funny as it is, can be found HERE...

Edited May 14, 2005 by Insight

[Explorer]

Pat, this is just downright retarded.

The original article, funny as it is, can be found HERE...

the original article #6 - those were the days, those were the days... i didn't know they still doing it

(got to start spinning again one of these days )

Explorer

[alaina]

Pat, this is just downright retarded.

The original article, funny as it is, can be found HERE...

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I may have had my gripes about the Hipster and Music Snob types back home but I miss them more than ever here. I'd gladly suffer their types in order not to hear the same stupid 50 old dance songs or the same drum and bass that all sounds the same to me.

And the hip hop DJ's... missed out on a good shot there. More than half can't keep a beat if their lives depended on it and think it is so cool to have all their friends in the booth shouting dumb crap over the music. bleh.

Not that I'm bitter over the music scene here

[penzman]

Cant knock it though mate, moneys good, free beer, loose women, free entry to the club and you get to listen to what you want!!!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

That sounds more like being a bar owner! Dave?

[BIG SPUDS]

Yes pie boy still got all my stuff, technics decks, 4 mixers, cd mixer, amps,

12 speakers, twin tape decks , radio tuner all running through my computer.

Easy to burn straight to CD. dont know how many records close to 2000 and 500 cd's and about 300 tapes.

Edited May 14, 2005 by BIG SPUDS

[chownah]

Yes pie boy still got all my stuff, technics decks, 4 mixers, cd mixer, amps,

12 speakers, twin tape decks , radio tuner all running through my computer.

Easy to burn straight to CD. dont know how many records close to 2000 and 500 cd's and about 300 tapes.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

You mean you've got close to 2000 of those round flat black ones? Awesome. Are you old enough to have obtained them when they were cutting edge technology? I mean do you remember when the DJ on the radio would say something like "I'm spinning the tall stacks of black wax for all you Jills and Jacks out in your shacks and caddylaks...."?

[BIG SPUDS]

Im 31. so no i am not that old!

[DJ Pat]

DJ Paul James

His dj style is fun,edgy,vain and accessible.You might hear The Rapture mixed with London electro or Gwen Stefani mixed with an old 80's classic like Blondie.Paul James is more concerned with blending a punked up mix of 00's with nostalgic classics to make sure the dance floor never guesses what is coming next.

ends.

In the photo that accompanies this tosh is a photo of the mighty dj.He looks like one of the Ramones but with a more arrogant sneer.

So does anybody know of a reasonably priced hitman available next weekend.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

These are the breed of DJs who are built up so much by the press and then the crowd are clueless anyway and are tricked into thinking that a DJ does something that is soooo amazing.

We don't do amazing things, I don't anyway, I just do an honest nights work when I play.

Fun, edgy and accessible? Just how? sounds like a one-man-band to me.

[chownah]

Was Wolf Man Jack the first person to make being a dj into an act?..............er.............none of you have heard of Wolf Man Jack?.....I guess I'll go gum down some mashed potatoes.............

[penzman]

Wolfman Jack on The Midnight Special!

[snoophound]

Were DJ S ever cool??

Wolfman Jack on The Midnight Special!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[fw1]

Were DJ S ever cool??

No, though many have thought they are and are seen as being cool by some.

The worst are those that -often pretentiously- draw attention away from the music&atmosphere towards themselves.

The best are those who are not pretentious/over-ambitious with the music, and simply do their job.

I remember a few pseudo-celebrity DJ's turning up at The Ministry of Sound, Bangkok a couple of years back, and emptying the place within 30 minutes. This was at 1am on a Saturday night at the club's peak hours.

Unfortunately, it's one of those things that has lots of pretenders and few that can do it well... .

Edited May 15, 2005 by fw1

[snoophound]

HMMM

Went their once a couple years back

The music if you could call the overly mixed crap that was so loud that the floor was shaking and making all of my groups ears ring.

wasnt busy there.....apart from some thai daddys boys outside showing off their flash cars.

Were DJ S ever cool??

No, though many have thought they are and are seen as being cool by some.

The worst are those that -often pretentiously- draw attention away from the music&atmosphere towards themselves.

The best are those who are not pretentious/over-ambitious with the music, and simply do their job.

I remember a few pseudo-celebrity DJ's turning up at The Ministry of Sound, Bangkok a couple of years back, and emptying the place within 30 minutes. This was at 1am on a Saturday night at the club's peak hours.

Unfortunately, it's one of those things that has lots of pretenders and few that can do it well... .

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[Insight]

Excuse me for contributing to this STOLEN content, but...

I remember watching Judge Jules (who I've always considered to be a complete &lt;deleted&gt;) at Cream around year 2000. The DJ booth itself had a small ledge where clubgoers could peer over and see what is going on with the turntables.

Anyways, this prick wanted the area surrounding the DJ booth to be clear of any spectators, probably so they couldn't watch him queue up his "Now" CD's. The bouncers took care of this operation, and took great pleasure in doing so.

Any nights he was playing were then avoided from then on. Tosser.

Edited May 15, 2005 by Insight

[fw1]

The worst DJ I've seen is Lisa Lashes.

I was convinced she was on something as the set she played had no cohesion whatsoever. Like almost everyone else, I had to leave as it was truly terrible.

[Joey Boy]

certain DJs get my respect, the likes of Sasha, Digweed, Scott Bond, BT and so on are superstars and are cool

Its pricks like Judge Jools that have abolutely no talent what so ever that get up my nose, was out at a resteraunt getting something to eat one night in ibiza, and who walks in, Judge Jools his wife and another female friend, they sat down @ the table next to us.. &lt;deleted&gt; me the guy was talkin some &lt;deleted&gt;, neither of the women could get a word in while he rattled along about having taken LSD in the 80's, always thought he was a tw@t anywayz but this just confirmed it for me..

[fw1]

Never met the guy but I have to say Judge Jules/Jools is indeed a crap name. Why would anyone want to call themselves that, or for that matter put DJ in front of their name?

Only invites disrespect.

[BIG SPUDS]

FACT - Judge jules got his name because he was studying to become a laywer or something before he made it DJ'ing.

A bit of useless info there for you!

[Insight]

When I was a youngster they had DJ's because music was only found on small round black discs and different songs were found on each side of these discs.  If someone wanted to hear a particular song then first the correct disc had to be found and then it had to be oriented so the proper side was up and it had to be placed on a phonograph....a phonograph is a device for retrieving the data from the disc and converting it into sound....we called t his data retrieval "playing the music".  This process of finding, orienting, and playing the disc was not automated so a human had to performed all of these tasks.  This person was called the "discjokey" which was sometimes shortened into "DJ".  I know this seems very strange to all of you who have digital music which can be manipulated electronically.  DJ's are no longer needed.....hooray that it can be done so easily now.  But old habits die hard and the DJ is still with us.  DJ's are like dinosaurs, perhaps thats why they are so strange.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Well said and very good point .

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Old gits unite

The problem nowadays is that there's so much music around with many different generes, but exposure to all these different styles will always remain limited.

The job of a (good) DJ nowadays is to select a certain genere then pick out the tunes that appeal to them specifically, hence the reason people have different tastes in DJ's, just as they have different tastes in the tunes themselves.

And so on and so forth...

[chownah]

Old gits unite

The problem nowadays is that there's so much music around with many different generes, but exposure to all these different styles will always remain limited.

The job of a (good) DJ nowadays is to select a certain genere then pick out the tunes that appeal to them specifically, hence the reason people have different tastes in DJ's, just as they have different tastes in the tunes themselves.

And so on and so forth...

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I used to go dancing regularly at clubs with dj's. A good dj can tell what mood the dancers are in and what types of music they are responding to and then play something to heighten their mood even more.

As to whether dj's are cool or have ever been cool.......coolness is in the eye of the beholder. One person's idea of coolness is another persons idea of farce. If I were a dj then right now I'd cue up the song "What is Hip?" by KC and the Sunshine Band....I think.

[DJ Pat]

The worst are those that -often pretentiously- draw attention away from the music&atmosphere towards themselves.

The best are those who are not pretentious/over-ambitious with the music, and simply do their job.

Those two lines are the best and most accurate descriptions of the DJ.

I'm the second line!!

Cheers.