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The North Or The South


citizen821

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The North is badly polluted, haunted by tribal spirits and crazy missionary zealots, full of heroin addicts, child molesters and retired axe murderers. The girls are all long gone, all that is left in terms of human life is ladyboy lepers over 65 with syphilis, scurvy and no teeth. Some of them are also missionaries.

The indidence of rabies, pulmonary infections and road deaths is the highest in the country. Northerners are generally hot-headed, amphetamine-chewing maniacs who insist on playing golf with you. If you lose, you go to ######. If you win, you will be infused with a serum which makes sure you have to dance a jig and recite the Australian national anthem before you can open your mouth and try to communicate with anybody.

The food consists mainly of raw insects and dried mud. Anyone who tries to leave is caught by the guards and forced to undergo a severe lobotomy that will make them report to everybody they meet what a great place the North is. 86 good people died to bring me this top-secret information. Please do not let them die in vain.

PS. Stay out of the North. DS.

Aye, but you try telling that to the youth of today

They won't believe you.

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This is pure nonsense... :o

It is a well known fact that the north has a mild climate, clean air, good food, friendly crafty people, and great treks.

Isaan women are beautiful, submissive, and love farang tourists.

On the flip side, the south is hot, humid, infested with bird flu and such, the beaches are dirty, prices are high, and everything stinks of backpackers and fish sauce.

BTW, heard of Tsunamis?

Wiped out all the Marmite stocks :D

Edited by OlRedEyes
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The North is cheaper and I think in many instinces more authentic Thai. It is also cooler. The South with the beaches and islands are also very nice. I come from a beach area( Florida) and really don't know if I could live anywhere that wasn't near the beach. Also on the whole the South also has more Falang stuff to do. I have been to Thailand many times and I am in the process of deciding the same thing. North, South or maybe even Bangkok!!!!!!!!! Good luck!

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lopburi3...if the winters are like Miami winters, then they're not bad. I grew up in Broward County just north of Miami and most winters were not so bad. Usually by noon it was back to shorts and tee shirts. We did have some very cold days though bit it seemed that we had very mild weather every other year.

Where in Broward County? I live in Hollywood but I am moving to Thailand in a month.

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Visiting..............cover as much as you can North,south,east and west. Living; One word sums it up: Isaan

You're biased.(rightfuly so ,but still biased)

My gf/wife is a from a Laos/ refugee background.(Third generation)Does' this still count as Issan or is it to far east(Khon Kaen)

Please send me PM if I am wrong.(I am aware of the geographical short comeings of my assumption but I would like them clarified by one of the forum )

Doc are you out there? :D

The reason I ask is that I have friends who are Karen and live south of CM. Sorry

a different story. :o

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The North is badly polluted, haunted by tribal spirits and crazy missionary zealots, full of heroin addicts, child molesters and retired axe murderers. The girls are all long gone, all that is left in terms of human life is ladyboy lepers over 65 with syphilis, scurvy and no teeth. Some of them are also missionaries.

The indidence of rabies, pulmonary infections and road deaths is the highest in the country. Northerners are generally hot-headed, amphetamine-chewing maniacs who insist on playing golf with you. If you lose, you go to ######. If you win, you will be infused with a serum which makes sure you have to dance a jig and recite the Australian national anthem before you can open your mouth and try to communicate with anybody.

The food consists mainly of raw insects and dried mud. Anyone who tries to leave is caught by the guards and forced to undergo a severe lobotomy that will make them report to everybody they meet what a great place the North is. 86 good people died to bring me this top-secret information. Please do not let them die in vain.

PS. Stay out of the North. DS.

Aye, but you try telling that to the youth of today

They won't believe you.

IF I knew how to put a big red X over the above I would.I have never read such a biased diatribe ever .

(I own a property next door to Mr Thaskin Shinawatra)be warned.

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The North is badly polluted, haunted by tribal spirits and crazy missionary zealots, full of heroin addicts, child molesters and retired axe murderers. The girls are all long gone, all that is left in terms of human life is ladyboy lepers over 65 with syphilis, scurvy and no teeth. Some of them are also missionaries.

The indidence of rabies, pulmonary infections and road deaths is the highest in the country. Northerners are generally hot-headed, amphetamine-chewing maniacs who insist on playing golf with you. If you lose, you go to ######. If you win, you will be infused with a serum which makes sure you have to dance a jig and recite the Australian national anthem before you can open your mouth and try to communicate with anybody.

The food consists mainly of raw insects and dried mud. Anyone who tries to leave is caught by the guards and forced to undergo a severe lobotomy that will make them report to everybody they meet what a great place the North is. 86 good people died to bring me this top-secret information. Please do not let them die in vain.

PS. Stay out of the North. DS.

Aye, but you try telling that to the youth of today

They won't believe you.

IF I knew how to put a big red X over the above I would.I have never read such a biased diatribe ever .

(I own a property next door to Mr Thaskin Shinawatra)be warned.

I know (said in a Cybil Fawlty voice) Hard to believe isn't it.But I have 15 friends who tunneled out of Chaing Mai and ended up in Penang. They didn't like it there and,as far as I know are still heading toward Australia.

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The North is badly polluted, haunted by tribal spirits and crazy missionary zealots, full of heroin addicts, child molesters and retired axe murderers. The girls are all long gone, all that is left in terms of human life is ladyboy lepers over 65 with syphilis, scurvy and no teeth. Some of them are also missionaries.

The indidence of rabies, pulmonary infections and road deaths is the highest in the country. Northerners are generally hot-headed, amphetamine-chewing maniacs who insist on playing golf with you. If you lose, you go to ######. If you win, you will be infused with a serum which makes sure you have to dance a jig and recite the Australian national anthem before you can open your mouth and try to communicate with anybody.

The food consists mainly of raw insects and dried mud. Anyone who tries to leave is caught by the guards and forced to undergo a severe lobotomy that will make them report to everybody they meet what a great place the North is. 86 good people died to bring me this top-secret information. Please do not let them die in vain.

Y :o our card is marked beware

PS. Stay out of the North. DS.

Aye, but you try telling that to the youth of today

They won't believe you.

IF I knew how to put a big red X over the above I would.I have never read such a biased diatribe ever .

(I own a property next door to Mr Thaskin Shinawatra)be warned.

I know (said in a Cybil Fawlty voice) Hard to believe isn't it.But I have 15 friends who tunneled out of Chaing Mai and ended up in Penang. They didn't like it there and,as far as I know are still heading toward Australia.

That is" outragouse" :D or something similar Basil

George,can you keep the below email address private

Mattnich if you did 'nt get my PM please get hold of me by [email protected]

Edited by roscoe
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david1...I'm from Fort Lauderdale.

After my wife and I were married here in Thailand, we moved to Fort Lauderdale and lived just south of Sunrise Blvd for 15 months before moving back to Thailand. We had originally planned to live in the US but with the costs of living/raising kids, plus other issues we decided to move here. We've been here for 2 1/2 years.

My mother-in-law's side of the family is from the South so I've traveled there a few times. My wife and I visited the North for our honeymoon and it was great...three days in Chiang Mai (main town) and three days in Doi Angkan (mountainside resort). According to a lot of folks on this forum the North has gone downhill in the last four years. Good luck!

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IF I knew how to put a big red X over the above I would.I have never read such a biased diatribe ever .

(I own a property next door to Mr Thaskin Shinawatra)be warned.

And that is exactly why you have no idea what its like .

Taksin moves around with an escort of armed policemen, he is in no danger.

Us falangs have to take our chances with all of the perils that Chownah has mentioned.

You live in the same street as Taksin, you have no idea what its like living in a soi without 24 hour protection

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The North is badly polluted, haunted by tribal spirits and crazy missionary zealots, full of heroin addicts, child molesters and retired axe murderers. The girls are all long gone, all that is left in terms of human life is ladyboy lepers over 65 with syphilis, scurvy and no teeth. Some of them are also missionaries.

The indidence of rabies, pulmonary infections and road deaths is the highest in the country. Northerners are generally hot-headed, amphetamine-chewing maniacs who insist on playing golf with you. If you lose, you go to ######. If you win, you will be infused with a serum which makes sure you have to dance a jig and recite the Australian national anthem before you can open your mouth and try to communicate with anybody.

The food consists mainly of raw insects and dried mud. Anyone who tries to leave is caught by the guards and forced to undergo a severe lobotomy that will make them report to everybody they meet what a great place the North is. 86 good people died to bring me this top-secret information. Please do not let them die in vain.

PS. Stay out of the North. DS.

Aye, but you try telling that to the youth of today

They won't believe you.

IF I knew how to put a big red X over the above I would.I have never read such a biased diatribe ever .

(I own a property next door to Mr Thaskin Shinawatra)be warned.

Never mind :o

A summary:

NORTH VERY DANGEROUS, SOUTH VERY GOOD.

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IF I knew how to put a big red X over the above I would.I have never read such a biased diatribe ever .

(I own a property next door to Mr Thaskin Shinawatra)be warned.

While I respect the fact that you do not share my view on the general state of affairs in the germ-infested atomic wasteland that is all-too-endearingly referred to as "the North" by the ladyboy missionary zealot lepers that populate it, I still cannot help but wonder how your powerful and influential politician friend will feel when he becomes aware that you have misspelled his name.

Biased, dear Roscoe, is but in the eye of the beholder. You are of course fully entitled to your own valuable opinions, but as a citizen of a free country and according to the principles of nationhood set forth in the Peace Treaty of Westfalia, I reserve the right to say "Goodness Gracious Me!" in reference to your completely unfairly chosen invective "a diatribe" referring to my carefully penned post above, and let you know it has caused me much grief, agony and suffering.

While I appreciate the gesture as such, there is no need to warn me, I am already all too well-aware of what may happen to those who risk their necks in order to oppose the evil oppressors who will not hesitate to lobotomize and kill to make sure they can harvest fresh gullible souls in the dungeons of Chiang Mai, Chiang Rai and the concentration camps of Amphur Om Koi.

PS. My Apologies for Any Inconvenience Caused or Suffered By Reading This Message. DS.

Disclaimer: The poster accepts no responsibility, neither explicit nor implicit, and makes no claims or warranties as to the contents of the above post or its accuracy, usefulness or entertainment value for the readership. The reader on his/her part, is personally responsible and liable for his/her interpretations and reactions to the post in question, and is strongly recommended to depart his/her present destination, as soon as is deemed reasonable in the jurisdiction for which said message is regarded as possessing legal force and validity, a ticket to Godthåb, Greenland, and there attempt to engage in meaningful and productive labour in direct or indirect assistance of the conservation and maintenance of endangered aquatic mammals. Failure to do so may result in the New Zealand national rugby team performing a war dance in your living room at 07.00 hrs on a Sunday morning after you have had a night on the piss.

Edited by meadish_sweetball
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Boy Oh Boy – North or South – The Question.

I’m afraid it has taken me a while to get to this. The chain broke you see. No electricity up here, so we have to peddle up our own. Not easy with a broken chain. Have to arrange an airdrop replacement, a piece at a time, by sparrow post.

Didn’t help that we had some rain the other day and a 15-meter wall of water came down from the hills. Have to step from the roof onto our log canoe now. Our first puddle of the season, I just wish I had closed the windows. Just thankful the floods haven’t started yet. Compressor chain looks flaky.

Come and live in the North, the more Farangs the merrier and the safer it will be for all of us. We all dread the monthly ceremonies at the What, when the Monques choose a new guest to be honoured. It’s funny, but we never seem to see the deeply honoured chosen one again thereafter. Always feel relieved that those hirsute Monques pick a recent arrival up here. Always thought those ladies were wearing furs, but it must be something in the diet. Beauty sure is in the eye of the beholder.

So, please come and live here, there is no-where else like it on this or any other planet. You will not believe it. Just wait a day or two for the water to go down and those vacuuming leeches to suck up the casualties.

Had a celebration the other day. Found a bottle of water and, when we poured it into a glass, we could see light through it. Don’t think that has ever happened before.

Our dog picked up a tick this morning. I couldn’t get to him on time. Afraid he was a dried husk within five minutes.

Let us know when you are arriving. We will need to register you with the What.

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Boy Oh Boy – North or South – The Question.

I’m afraid it has taken me a while to get to this. The chain broke you see. No electricity up here, so we have to peddle up our own. Not easy with a broken chain. Have to arrange an airdrop replacement, a piece at a time, by sparrow post.

Didn’t help that we had some rain the other day and a 15-meter wall of water came down from the hills. Have to step from the roof onto our log canoe now. Our first puddle of the season, I just wish I had closed the windows. Just thankful the floods haven’t started yet. Compressor chain looks flaky.

Come and live in the North, the more Farangs the merrier and the safer it will be for all of us. We all dread the monthly ceremonies at the What, when the Monques choose a new guest to be honoured. It’s funny, but we never seem to see the deeply honoured chosen one again thereafter. Always feel relieved that those hirsute Monques pick a recent arrival up here. Always thought those ladies were wearing furs, but it must be something in the diet. Beauty sure is in the eye of the beholder.

So, please come and live here, there is no-where else like it on this or any other planet. You will not believe it. Just wait a day or two for the water to go down and those vacuuming leeches to suck up the casualties.

Had a celebration the other day. Found a bottle of water and, when we poured it into a glass, we could see light through it. Don’t think that has ever happened before.

Our dog picked up a tick this morning. I couldn’t get to him on time. Afraid he was a dried husk within five minutes.

Let us know when you are arriving. We will need to register you with the What.

Where? Which What?

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