Am I Wrong?

[Gary A]

If you are planning to have a carefree live for today lifestyle, do it while you are young and still know EVERYTHING. Eventually you will come to the conclusion that older and more experienced people may have been correct about planning for the future.

[fiddlehead]

I can relate to your lifestyle Geronimo as I had a similar 17 years of my 59 year life.

For those 17 years, I hiked (trekked is the word I believe many European's call it) through the mountains of America, Nepal, Pyrenees, etc. with no worries except how much food I had on my back (which equates to how many days before I have to hit a road to hitchike to a town to score more)

Those treks lead to my adventurous lifestyle which turned into world travel.

But, then Thailand came along. Like many here, i met a Thai girl, fell in love and now have a wonderful family.

For the 1st time in my life, I have a sense of responsibility to others.

I envy you your guilt free attitude on worrying about bringing kids into this world without a good education.

I imagine the difference is that my parents took good care of me and yours didn't.

You had to learn the hard way. I chose to learn to be adventurous.

It does pay off (adventure) and so many amazing things do happen to those with the right attitude and those who take chances.

I also could tell many stories of being down to my last bit of food and meeting a wagon train full of Mormans in Montana that were re-enacting an exodus to Canada 100 years before or the time the owl woke me up to watch the northern lights together in Washington state.

Things like this you can try to explain to others but they will never really believe you because they can't imagine themselves breaking out of their sheltered lifestyle or smiling and sharing what you have with strangers.

Good luck to you. I have settled down a little more than i like into the rat race now and work to support my responsibilities.

I certainly do miss the old traveling days though.

[chrisll]

Well there u go people.no matter you have nothing to offer this country no money in your pocket and no prospects and be a complete loser,u cant still come here have 2 kids and a wife.O h dear.

Edited May 4, 2010 by chrisll

[IanForbes]

I've met far too many people who waited until they were older to experience life. Unfortunately, very often they also lost their desire and enthusiasm when they finally acquired the wealth to take an adventurous holiday. And, they often lost their health to complete such a journey. Possessions are just things to tie you down and keep you from being free. I'm not wealthy, but I'm very rich in life experiences. Fortunately, I also chose a career that gave me the things I enjoy in life... the great outdoors. I now value my time and freedom more than anything.

And, although I've raised two children to be responsible adults, I did it without losing my own dreams. Now I have the best of two worlds. All a parent really needs to do is raise children to be independent and level headed enough to follow their own dreams. It takes very little money to do that. So many Thai women have learned to live on next to nothing, and if you choose the right woman it's quite possible to live a frugal, happy life. I think that is all the OP is saying.

[NBD]

I don't think you're wrong, but without meaning to be dismissive in the least, I don't think it means you stand any less chance of getting run over/shot/eaten by a shark or kidnapped by terrorists tomorrow. I think it just means that you never really did stand a great chance of any such gruesome death by doing the things you did. The thing that seperates you from most of us is that you conquered that fear and didn't let it stop you, and this is fantastic. Good for you.

[fletchsmile]

Happy Birthday for yesterday Geronimo.

Great topic to discuss over a few drinks on your birthday - type of thing this old wizard enjoys as well - if you ever feel like revisiting the subject on any other day with a few drinks...

As an old friend once said to me, ours is but to make the best of the time that is given to us.

Not sure yours is the best philosophy on life if you have very young kids... but that's where the drinks come in to help the thoughts and discussion flow. After the kids are safely tucked away somewhere of course

BTW You might enjoy reading Paul Coelho's "The Alchemist". Some interesting thoughts in there on finding your own "personal legend" or path.

[Jim's_a_Thai_Fox]

Hi,

I feel a little bit sorry for those who seem to live in a constant state of worry and fear about the future, busily working and saving for that rainy day, only to realise that they have missed so many sunny ones in doing so...

there is a balance to be had for living everyday like it was your last and having a common sense approach to know that there will hopefully be about 20 years of your life where you are not going to wish to work but shall need need some financial income... I just get a little irked when those 'worker bee' people in life tend to look down their noses at those people who chose fun/adventure/freedom over work/savings/insurance.

To each their own,

[t.s]

I am not disputing your story...but a lot of people were similar in nature taking risks and feeling invincible at such a young age. Always smarter than the adults around you.

Then somewhere in time you have to become responisble for others besides yourself. For many like myself this responsibility leads people to change their care free atitidude of only worrying about theirselve. No longer are you actions only affecting you but now others are dependent on your whimsicle nature not to save for a rainy day or disasters that come about. You yourself made mention that you will help others that have tried helping themselves and have faild, being you have the means to help at the time. Well to someone like myself if you are in need and I know that you have been barely making it when you could have tried a bit harder and saved a bit more, I may see you in need one day and say yes I have the means but I do not think he has tried hard enough to prevent or get out of this situation. Just a thought, how somone may view your carefree life when you have a family and you sit and smoke your earnings when there may be another need for the family. Is that responsible living?

Not impressed with your lifes choices but do hope you make the right decisions for your family and can always provide as needed. I call you a marginal person one who will only do what is marginal to get the job done.

thats alot of typing to simply say: i dont like you because you admit you smoke weed. bluster all you wish, but realize youare not fooling anyone.

marginal person indeed.

[billythefish]

I Take my hat off to you!

you will not find many people on this forum with the same GUTS as you have shown, most of them are Armchair Generals and a bunch of wanke_rS!

[norwayeagle]

I Take my hat off to you!

Ditto

[elkangorito]

How can I be wrong when I look back at all the amazing things that have happened to me

You are not wrong & nor are you right. Your 'end' will become you as quick & as unsure as it would for anybody else.

[cobra]

Living in the moment is fine, but moments turn into days, days turn into years,

Give us an update when your old and gray on whether those doors are still opening up for you,

Not saying your going to be that old guy on the bench, living a marginal existence with little assets and depending on the kindness of strangers, but we've all seen them and we have a pretty good idea how they got there.

Wishing you continued success and excitement, just don't ask me for loose change,

Edited May 4, 2010 by cobra

[ThaiFelix]

No thanks.

I rather have a nice 9-5 office job in the west with pension, medical care and all kinds of social security. And be safe in my protected environment where nothing can go wrong. It's better to be safe then sorry. I recommend all you guys to do the same thing. Thailand is a huge liability. I recommend you guys to leave. I am speaking from experience. I lost everything.

I'd rather live in the 'here and now' than in some 'possible' future.

I watched my mother sit around wasting her life waiting for that 'possible' future. She lived a pretty miserable life with my father but stayed to make sure us kids were just fine. One day on a bus tour she met a really great guy who made her life happy and she saw there was much more to life. She left my dad and then I saw her sit around for years waiting for her new man to retire so they could live their dream of travelling around the country in a caravan enjoying their lives. Thats all they talked about. About 3 months before he retired she was diagnosed with cancer and was dead 6 months later.

A 9 to 5, pension, medical care and all kinds of social security didnt help her much but rather held her back from enjoying her life.

The sheer waste of life got to me and not long after I put an end to my own unhappy marriage by leaving my first wife (no kids) and went travelling again. Now a lot older and looking back Ive been a lot of places and done a lot of things...I've really enjoyed my adventures and had a very fullfilling and exciting life. I do have some savings etc for the future (less than the average) but I am not going to let a 'possible' future interfere with a 'definite' present.

[Thakkar]

I guess there are Decision Points™ in one's life and at those times the recipe for the next step is: a sprinkling of security concerns, a consideration for family, a dash of daring, and a whole lotta luck. I try not to have to have too many regrets over paths not taken.

The Road Not Taken

Robert Frost (1874–1963)

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference

[iwad2010]

Reminds me of an old friend.

He was a 'traveller' who liked to embelish stories. He was good at it, and often cadged drinks from people who were willing and astounded to listen to his tales on the road. He was a self stiled 'drop out'. Couldn't bare the thought of doing a normal job.

He would get so absorbed in his story telling, that he would forget that I was on a good few of the trips.

Te real truth was never quite the same as his version of events.

A cross between Walter Mitty & Indiana Jones.

[lovelomsak]

I am not saying this would be your personality but most people I have met who live for today use people a lot are selfcentered and feel no responsibility to others or to community. They take but give nothing back.Like what did you do for the people who took care of you for 3 months in the desert? Or was it a holiday provided free of charge by people with good intent?Did you ever go back to help them?

You ate their food slept in their homes. So what did you contribute to them?

I feel perhaps you are wrong. But I donot know the whole story.

[bina]

The driver thought I was nuts to want to get off telling me that there was literally nothing here. But, get off I did and as I watched the bus moving away in the distance I suddenly thought "Oh no!! You've gone too far this time!!!" After an hour or two, I was sat under the only palm tree in sight, smoking a cigarette and wondering what was going to transpire, when I saw a group of camels coming over a sand dune. They approached me and one of them handed me a tin of peaches. He then smiled and they left, leaving me thinking that this was like something out of a Woody Allen movie. A short time later they returned and took me and my backpack off to their camp. I stayed with them for 3 months and they taught me how to live in their world. Then they gave me the bus fare to Cairo and I was back on the same bus (you should have seen the driver's face when he saw me!!)

right. and then we send out cushi rimon to do a costly search and rescue with heicopters/dogs and donkeys to find u at the bottom of a cliff, dehydrated, robbed by the drug running beduins, and left for dead.... (( yeah yeah, we get some like this every year to read about in the paper... if its not cushi rimon, its the ein gedi search and rescue gys. last week some one crossed over to egypt by accident on a hike on his own, he spent three days in jail before returning home.... canned peaches, right. usually, if u get anything for free from a beduin besides cofee and tea (and grass), its cola.

but yeah, there is something to be said for this type of living. i do it. i came to israel cause it seemed like a good idea at the time; did lots of wierd things, did jobs i wouldnt have imagined that i would do; got divorced. married a thai guy. i have no money to leave the kids when i die(kibbutnik, remember?) but like ian forbes, have taught them to be independant thinking and practical people, willing to take some chance in life.

sitting in a home safe somewhere surrounded by four walls and money makes some people happy and others bored (like me); many many people thought i was a nut case to marry a thai worker (given my countrys attitude to them); but it still seems a good decision despite the problematic side to it. much better then be married to my ex and endure a loveless and annoying marriage that would keep me safe til my death...i know people that are terrified to travel to certain areas here and live in constant fear of new things, new food, new poeple, new rules.... instead of expanding, they are shrinking inwards.

i feel that as i get older, my responsibilites towards things reduces itself. less responsibility towards the kibbutz (less willingness to be on a million committees etc), less to my grown kids (they are responsible for their own lives now/or in the army); freinds have come and gone , things happen to them (illness, financial stuff, whatever), and with time, u have to stand more on your own. a part of life is death and not taking chances doesnt stop u from dying, just maybe keeps u alive a bit longer but even that isnt guaranteed. the point is to put in what u take out , do it with a smile, , and always keep a bottle of water and some GORP (raisins peanuts) in your bag, cause u never know.....

happy birthday.

bina

israel

[norwayeagle]

The driver thought I was nuts to want to get off telling me that there was literally nothing here. But, get off I did and as I watched the bus moving away in the distance I suddenly thought "Oh no!! You've gone too far this time!!!" After an hour or two, I was sat under the only palm tree in sight, smoking a cigarette and wondering what was going to transpire, when I saw a group of camels coming over a sand dune. They approached me and one of them handed me a tin of peaches. He then smiled and they left, leaving me thinking that this was like something out of a Woody Allen movie. A short time later they returned and took me and my backpack off to their camp. I stayed with them for 3 months and they taught me how to live in their world. Then they gave me the bus fare to Cairo and I was back on the same bus (you should have seen the driver's face when he saw me!!)

right. and then we send out cushi rimon to do a costly search and rescue with heicopters/dogs and donkeys to find u at the bottom of a cliff, dehydrated, robbed by the drug running beduins, and left for dead.... (( yeah yeah, we get some like this every year to read about in the paper... if its not cushi rimon, its the ein gedi search and rescue gys. last week some one crossed over to egypt by accident on a hike on his own, he spent three days in jail before returning home.... canned peaches, right. usually, if u get anything for free from a beduin besides cofee and tea (and grass), its cola.

but yeah, there is something to be said for this type of living. i do it. i came to israel cause it seemed like a good idea at the time; did lots of wierd things, did jobs i wouldnt have imagined that i would do; got divorced. married a thai guy. i have no money to leave the kids when i die(kibbutnik, remember?) but like ian forbes, have taught them to be independant thinking and practical people, willing to take some chance in life.

sitting in a home safe somewhere surrounded by four walls and money makes some people happy and others bored (like me); many many people thought i was a nut case to marry a thai worker (given my countrys attitude to them); but it still seems a good decision despite the problematic side to it. much better then be married to my ex and endure a loveless and annoying marriage that would keep me safe til my death...i know people that are terrified to travel to certain areas here and live in constant fear of new things, new food, new poeple, new rules.... instead of expanding, they are shrinking inwards.

i feel that as i get older, my responsibilites towards things reduces itself. less responsibility towards the kibbutz (less willingness to be on a million committees etc), less to my grown kids (they are responsible for their own lives now/or in the army); freinds have come and gone , things happen to them (illness, financial stuff, whatever), and with time, u have to stand more on your own. a part of life is death and not taking chances doesnt stop u from dying, just maybe keeps u alive a bit longer but even that isnt guaranteed. the point is to put in what u take out , do it with a smile, , and always keep a bottle of water and some GORP (raisins peanuts) in your bag, cause u never know.....

happy birthday.

bina

israel

Thank you for sharing pieces of your life with us/me

You got my respect Bina.

It was Good to read! Wish both of you all the best.

[Geekfreaklover]

there is a theory by karl jung about "a causal events", like this one where "some thing tells you" to get off a buss for no reason and then something aamazing happens, and a book about it call "syncronisity" but i cant remember who by; interesting stuff; a sceptic who's never opened thier life or brain might dismiss it as a load of <deleted>, but for people

who have experienced similar thing it could make alot of sense.

although not quite as extreem as your tale i've had many similar expirences. and coincidentally have married and had 2 kids in thailand. i started to ponder how about whats going to be best for my kids and not just myself; basically thinking chance of uk education would be best (even i bumbled along through life and around the world doesnt mean thats nessarcarily what they want) but really didnt fancy going in to the mundane life, one of these fate incidents threw up a chance now and i'm taking it, ; the universe has alligned for my benifit again; all through life event o signposts have , even if i'm not ealise at the time, led through to the good way, lucky.

Things like this and other experience lead me to think of some kind of energy flows and various guides; like the whole world, possably the universe is i full of this energy, like an ocean with many currents and we like the fish can still choose which way to swim, but if we ride the current the journey will be much easier. maybe something to do with magnatism?

I'm not saying you should move back to usa, but for sure you should concider your families prospects, what if u died tomorrow,[ i reckon other people can interupt ones flow like a ruddy great fishing trauller, nothing to do with your own karma, a badman could stab you, and then you rebourn in to a simillar life, not everything in life is from your own karma, karma is being ceated all the time, you could b the victim of someone elses creation of bad], but anyway,,, familly need sumsavings or means like a business or property for rent incase of the worse case sinario, this is my current thinking so we're off to blighty to create an egg.

happy birthday.

b lucky

Synchronicty was by Jung, I believe.

Thanks for the original post, good to read some people are living for the moment. The present moment is all we have, enjoy it.