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Spotting A Future Expat In Trouble?


TAWP

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My gf got a msg (or, several) over Facebook today from a Belgian gentleman that seemed eager to move to the Kingdom.

He first sent a msg asking her where she was from. Upon receiving a reply that she was from Thailand he sent:

Really oh splendid , why , well foorgive me but i gonne explain a little thing about me .

Now i live in Belgium , in june i was in Bkk i stayed in PP House Phra Khanong , in december im back there , i had a relation of 10 years , she was cheating on me so i went straight to my home where my mother lives with me , she 87yo , in the future when i comming to be allone i move to Bkk , it stole my heart " the city & the people " . So as you know i'm single i have no kids & i'm looking for a GF from Bkk , caus at last thats where i'm going to live for now i vsit Bkk 3 times a year .

My future gf , well i know Thai girls are not like the European , Belgian , a lot of difference's , thai girls are so sweet , they do understand the word love , me i'm gonne tread my future gf as a princess , i'm not like mosr Euopean & American man and i dont see Thai girls as a toy ( sextoy ) no i dont , what i like is to spoil them , care about them , you're all human with a heart & i dont play with feelings ! .

Thats why i asks you if im there in december or end of november , i dont know the exacte date , i stay 3 weeks thats sure , if we can meet some day ?? , we could go shopping to MBK & eat something , we can go for a drink , have fun etc..., please believe me when i'm saying i'm not a butterfly !! .

I hope you accept these , we can learn to know each other and see what happens , after all we are friend on here so why not meet some day in real , what know " i explained allready the ine who become's my gf is save in everything " , if you wants i can explain further then that for example living in my studio when im not there etc...

Your friend [Name]

Belgium

At this point my gf rolled her eyes and told me to reply to him.

Now, we all know that there is some great girls out here.

But we also know that there are literally thousands that isn't.

How do I break the news to him?

(See the underlined section.)

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I believe in Facebook there is a tab field where your girlfriend can change her status from "single" to "in a relationship" or something similar, it might help avoiding such requests or broken hearts....

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How does one break this news to OP?

When males on Facebook write things like the underlined to Thai females, and OP and his girl friend think it was honest talk spoken from heart, it doesn't necessarily mean that it is the male Facebook writer that is naive and needs news broken.

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At least he's looking roughly in the right places. beats looking for a potential partner on some ThaiFriendFinder site, or in Pattaya. If I was him I would have worded it differently, I would have phrased it as asking if she had any single freinds, etc. That's still polite enough IMHO. Other than that, he may be on a reasonable track.

No worse than most of the people on this site anyway, present company excluded of course. ;)

Edited by WinnieTheKhwai
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The alternative to the guy being naive is that he knows what he is doing and is telling girls what they want to hear. When he comes to Thailand he'll have a few 'good girls' lined up. Odds are he can get a shag from a couple of them.

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Yes i see a future expat in trouble. You will soon be dumped and replaced by a wealthy Belgiam guy who can treat your gf as his princess. :D

I disagree with the posters about him being a sucker etc.

Can't you sniff it...

He is already an expert in the soft hello kitty way Thai girls are.....he will have no problem getting dates like that....

Roblock has got it perfect :lol:

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If he's not the sort of guy Changian is talking about but really is a naive sucker tell him to read Private Dancer and wise up.

Off-topic, but I have to say that Private Dancer is probably the worst piece of writing related to Thailand I've ever read (and I include Stickman and the posts on this forum in that), and Leather seems to have a healthy dose of incest-fantasy going on for himself.

That said, anyone who needs to be told that getting romantically involved with prostitutes is generally a bad idea is likely sufficiently moronic that Private Dancer might actually be on their level.

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Off-topic, but, yes, her status indicates that she is in a relationship and he was approved as a friend some hour earlier hence he could msg her.

Some more msg's was sent after an initial reply pointing her status to him and from his replies I am affirmed in my theory that he is one of many guys that will have a very bad experience if they are unlucky to msg the wrong girl...

Sadely this is only one of many that I have seen that seem to have a bulls-eye painted on their forehead. A good indicator is when they send either a novel-length msg after getting a reply saying basically 'hi, nice to meet you too' or so, or one that sends many msg's and leaves many messages on lots of pictures...even write that they are jelous that others can see the same very pictures that is posted in the albums (...).

But how does one break the news to someone that perhaps they should think more with the big brain and not the small brain?

Would hate to see them lose all their savings to the wrong girl...

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Are you sure the Mrs is passing over all the unsolicited mails she been getting?

In my wonder years not too long ago, I was doing a 'good' girl I pulled off the internet, and her phone kept ringing, she did nt hear the phone, as she is bitchy mouth trash talking screamer. After she recovered her breath and checked her phone, she said it was her husband and would probably be hitting the road ASAP. Well i left before her while putting her number on the call barring section.

If your GF or wife should be on social sites, you are supposed to have unfettered access to her account. Best is not for her to be making friends with strangers.

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Are you sure the Mrs is passing over all the unsolicited mails she been getting?

In my wonder years not too long ago, I was doing a 'good' girl I pulled off the internet, and her phone kept ringing, she did nt hear the phone, as she is bitchy mouth trash talking screamer. After she recovered her breath and checked her phone, she said it was her husband and would probably be hitting the road ASAP. Well i left before her while putting her number on the call barring section.

If your GF or wife should be on social sites, you are supposed to have unfettered access to her account. Best is not for her to be making friends with strangers.

Why not, my wife is on sites like that and chat with guys, I really dont care about it as i do the same thing. But its all about trust, maybe im a fool but i like to trust the one i am in a relation with. I feel that if you ban people from doing things they will find ways around it. You cant force someone to love you and stay with you.

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I know a Thai lady that fools around talking to lots of guys on the Net, in her 40's nice looker, two kids and lots of debt, hence the Net. One guy, retired, came over for the first time to meet the lady for a holidat, within two weeks he had applied for a retirement visa. I met the guy who said it's great here, so different to back home. I said, just be careful and don't get in to deep until you know the setup. After all, l new her motive was the big debts she had accrued.

Month went by and l saw him again, hows it going, l said, he said ,l am a bit worried cos she keeps waking me up in the night asking how my shares are doing, l laughed and said, well l did worn you to be careful.

Haven't seen him since, scuppered off back to blighty.

The net is great for looking and hooking up with girls. I met a few that way when my relation was still open. They even knew i had an wife (like to be honest) and i never paid a dime. I made things clear all the time.

Many older guys fear the net as something evil, people don't need the net to do bad things it does make things easier.

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Are you sure the Mrs is passing over all the unsolicited mails she been getting?

/../

If your GF or wife should be on social sites, you are supposed to have unfettered access to her account. Best is not for her to be making friends with strangers.

I have, and Facebook is hardly some obscure and weird site where one have to be worried that people are registered to. And only a very insecure man would request that the girl closed her account as soon as they started dating or got together...

ask yr gf to reply back to her new found friend and ask for some money for her sick buffalo, and see what happens, dont forget to update us :D

I cannot give too much info, but let's just say that a friend did this, even replied in his girls name at times (as it got boring for her) and several men sent money...

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It seems like most guys that live in Thailand knows the score (if they don't they will soon) but that still many men back in Europe are fairly easy marks for the wrong person. It is just sometimes that one see a train-wreck-to-happen one would like to inform them...but in a way so they actually take in the info and learn from it...

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Are you sure the Mrs is passing over all the unsolicited mails she been getting?

/../

If your GF or wife should be on social sites, you are supposed to have unfettered access to her account. Best is not for her to be making friends with strangers.

I have, and Facebook is hardly some obscure and weird site where one have to be worried that people are registered to. And only a very insecure man would request that the girl closed her account as soon as they started dating or got together...

Twap you are right either a real possessive and / or insecure guy would do such a thing. Maybe Lumumba is not the guy he claims to be else he would not feel threatened by something like that.

I know i don't feel it at all even when the relation was open (for both partners) i never felt threatened by other guys. I am just confident about myself and the relation. Once i felt like that and it went horribly wrong but in hind sight it was a real good thing as she turned out to be a financial and emotional disaster to all guys she meets.

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Off-topic, but I have to say that Private Dancer is probably the worst piece of writing related to Thailand I've ever read

You must not have read very many books concerning the bar scene in Thailand, because it is among the best. Get yourself some of the jewels from Bangkok Books and other publishers who specialize in this stuff and you should see the light. :D

Edited by Ulysses G.
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Call me old fashioned, (OK, you can ), but if a Thai female (married or not) is on the Web talking to farangs, to me it's the same as going into town and seeing my lady sitting in a bar having a cosy chat with a farang and everything that that could lead too. When on the Net reading stuff ones mind isn't a blank, it's working very hard taking in all sorts of stuff. One can talk of trust but l think inevitably one thing leads to another.

Talking to farangs? Well, sure, she does send cute msg to my wall when I am at work during the day...

I think you are perhaps unfamiliar on how Facebook works. Most middle class (and other) girl seem to have a profile and they often have all of their friends linked in. Much as I, and i am sure many other guys here, have all their friends from back home linked up. Including family members. I fail to see what is wrong with that...

If however the person was on a dating site. Without you knowing it. Then yes, that would be a bad sign.

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Call me old fashioned, (OK, you can ), but if a Thai female (married or not) is on the Web talking to farangs, to me it's the same as going into town and seeing my lady sitting in a bar having a cosy chat with a farang and everything that that could lead too. When on the Net reading stuff ones mind isn't a blank, it's working very hard taking in all sorts of stuff. One can talk of trust but l think inevitably one thing leads to another.

You sound a bit insecure about your relation, sure maybe one thing leads to an other. It could happen but only if she isn't happy in her relation. Nobody will force her to set the next step but if it happens it could be a one time thing or a sign on the wall something isn't good in the relation.

Better to work on the relation then to exclude temptation.

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a 419 - Thai Version, come to my mind.

I think you may be right and this belongs in the scam thread.

It so happens that just two days ago, I got an email and phonecall from an old friend in Canada who's been married to a Thai for over twenty years. With his permission, I quote below the email, redacting some of the names:

Hello Thakkar,

I was wondering if you can assist us? We have an emergency situation in Hong Kong.

We have an acquaintance that is detained at the immigration department of the Hong Kong airport. His name is Nelson Morgan.

Here is some background information. He met my sister in-law on the internet and they both wanted to get married. They have known each other for a year, through the internet. As part of Thai wedding ceremonies, there is a dowry involved for the bride. Nelson claims that he is from Britain, and that he has never travelled to Asia before. There was a large sum of British pounds($125,000)and 15 K of gold which was discovered by the Hong Kong Immigration during their routine searches. I did speak with Nelson, but he was very difficult to understand. He had a heavy unknown accent, not British at all, and very similar to French.

He was detained and was not allowed to go through to Bangkok so he can wed my sister in law. He requests that we send an outstanding fine of $1150.00 USD through western union to an address on Nathan Road in Hong Kong. It belongs to a so called “agent”, working on behalf of the Hong Kong Immigration. Do you know if this really exists in Hong Kong? I have never heard of this and I feel very suspicios. They require the receipt as proof before releasing him. The officer in charge, Mr. Chung, says that he will not entertain third parties. Any person, including lawyers, coming to see him at the airport will be arrested for money laundering. He was offered to connect with the British Consulate, but Nelson declined, according to Mr. Chung.

We have sent off an e-mail to the Hong Kong British Consulate. Checking their website, their was a PDF file to download. There does not appear to be anything they can do except to act as a co-ordinator between the detained party and his friends/family.

Please see the following e-mails that I am forwarding to you below. The strange thing is

The e-mail address does not indicate it is coming from the Hong Kong immigration department. Has things changed that much since the hand over to China?

Anyways, we as an outsider are not familiar of the procedures in Hong Kong regarding this matter. If you wish to discuss this further on the phone, I'll call you.

We do not wish to be swindled by a group of potential gangsters. I have attached his photos that he sent to my sister in law.

Your advice is greatly appreciated!

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Call me old fashioned, (OK, you can ), but if a Thai female (married or not) is on the Web talking to farangs, to me it's the same as going into town and seeing my lady sitting in a bar having a cosy chat with a farang and everything that that could lead too. When on the Net reading stuff ones mind isn't a blank, it's working very hard taking in all sorts of stuff. One can talk of trust but l think inevitably one thing leads to another.

Talking to farangs? Well, sure, she does send cute msg to my wall when I am at work during the day...

I think you are perhaps unfamiliar on how Facebook works. Most middle class (and other) girl seem to have a profile and they often have all of their friends linked in. Much as I, and i am sure many other guys here, have all their friends from back home linked up. Including family members. I fail to see what is wrong with that...

If however the person was on a dating site. Without you knowing it. Then yes, that would be a bad sign.

Yep your right, old fashioned, don't know how it works but my thoughts are about ladies talking to male strangers on the Net for ' fun and their men folk think it OK..

Your entitled to your opinion and so am i.. different folks different strokes i guess.

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Yep, makes the world go round. :)

Just one question are you allowed to talk to strange girls or is it just a one way thing for the woman folk and giving the man folk more leeway ? If that is the the case then i don't really think its fair.

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